“They said since I dun have a restraining order or evidence, there is nothing they can do,” she drunkenly slurred sobbing, then guzzled the rest of her beer.
“Mom, you need to sober up so we can talk about this,” I told her.
“I am sober! I like my beer, Dez. If you came to see me once in a while with Gabby, you would know that, but you dun know anything bout me. You says I’m a drunk, but you dunno my life or what I bin through. Back off,” she said, pushing me away. “I’m not an alcoholic, I like me beer.”
I groaned in Jill’s direction.
“I heard that,” she said, laying down on Jill’s white sofa.
I couldn’t believe Jill was just going to let her sleep on her brand new couch, but we both knew Mom would scream at us and probably storm out if one of us said anything to her. She could never take any criticism and was non-confrontational. She’d never talk about it again, then the next time we would come over she would pretend it never happened. Maybe she was sometimes too drunk to remember the next day, who knows.
I could hear her snoring. Walking toward her, I bent down to take the beer out of her hand so it wouldn’t spill while she was sleeping.
“What are we going to do?” Jill asked.
I walked over to Mom’s purse and pulled the strap off her arm. I carried her purse to the table and dumped it out.
“What are you doing, Dez? What if she wakes up?” Jill asked, obviously apprehensive.
“It’s okay, Jill. I just want to make sure her inhaler is in here in case she has an asthma attack.”
“Oh, okay.”
As I dumped the contents of the smaller pockets in her big purse out, two bottles of pills came rolling out, along with the inhaler. One bottle was OxyContin and the other was Xanax. I knew Xanax was for her anxiety, but why was she taking Oxys?
“Jill, why was mom taking OxyContin?”
“I wasn’t supposed to tell you, but she said her back has been hurting her. She was afraid you would judge her.”
“She was afraid I would judge her?”
“She’s been taking them every day, she told me it really helps.”
I examined the bottles closer. I dug in her purse and I could feel another bottle of some sort. I found another hidden pocket and two empty bottles of OxyContin were in there.
“Well, all three bottles have different doctor’s names on them. This one says her primary doctor, Dr. Hanson, this one says Dr. Joneson, and the third bottle says Dr. Brinley,” I said, pointing at their names.
“What do you think that means? Do you think she is going to different doctors because she is addicted to Opioids?”
“Yes, that’s exactly what I’m thinking. That or she’s selling them.”
“Oh my god, Dez, I just don’t think I can take any more bad news tonight. There has to be another explanation for this.”
“What other explanation can she have? And OxyContin can gave you anxiety, which explains the Xanax.”
“Yeah, but Mom has anxiety already. I just don’t want to deal with this right now. Can we put them back, please?” she asked, worried.
“I need to count them first, though, just to make sure she isn’t taking too many.”
“Fine.”
I counted twenty-nine and wrote it on my hand so I wouldn’t forget. I would just have to find a way to count them again sometime tomorrow. I packed up her purse and left it, along with her inhaler, on the table in front of the couch.
Jill and I walked into the kitchen.
“Do you really think Dad will hurt her?” I asked.
She grabbed a pizza out of the freezer and preheated the oven. “Yeah, he’s pretty violent. Mom never filed any charges against him all those years, so he has no criminal record for domestics.”
“You would think he would have done this to someone else in the past. It isn’t like suddenly he could be this abusive man.
“Unless they were all scared like Mom.”
“I guess,” I said, pulling up a stool at her breakfast bar.
“You don’t remember how bad he was, do you?”
“No, not really. I was a baby.”
“Destiny, Mom would scream all the time. One time I came downstairs and she told me he beat her with a frying pan. I wasn’t much older than Gabby.”
“Are you serious? A frying pan?” I asked in disbelief.
“Yes, he’s crazy, I told you. One time he pushed me down the stairs, Destiny. One time he even broke her nose.”
“You have to be kidding me. I can’t believe she started drinking after she left him. I mean, just knowing that drugs and alcohol is what caused him to be the way he is.”
“I really don’t know. I guess she is just trying to numb the pain. Why do you think she was so hard on you when you were depressed, after you left Bryan and you were staying with her.”
“I don’t know, I guess I just thought she was just being Mom.”
“No, she is very depressed and has been for a very long time,” she explained, removed the pizza from the cardboard and putting it in the oven.
“You are putting that in before it’s preheated?”
“I like it better that way.”
“Well, alcohol will only make her more depressed. Jill, she doesn’t even think she has a problem.”
“Yeah, only because everyone is scared to tell her she does. I mean, could you imagine Mom at an intervention? She would literally be so angry she would just walk out of there and never talk to any of us again. She would probably get even more depressed. The only friends she has left are the two ladies she works with.”
“Yeah, well I just don’t know how to help her anymore.”
She walked toward me, placing her hands on my shoulders while I sat on the stool.
“Dez, she can’t get help until she realizes she has a problem. All we can do is just take her keys when she wants to drive and keep our distance.”
“It’s easier said than done.”
“Oh, trust me, I know. Right now we just need to focus on keeping her safe from Dad.”
“Well, I’m glad she doesn’t have a gun.”
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Sitting at McDonald’s, I took a sip of my hot coffee while watching kids play in the play-place. The moms ate their meals in peace while their kids made new friends and played hard, their only worries that entangled their minds was when their mom would make them go home.
I saw Casey through the big windows, walking into McDonald’s and coming to find me immediately. He looked just as disturbed as yesterday, if not worse. His eyes were sunken in, as if he hadn’t slept all night, and he kept looking over his shoulder. He sat across from me at the table.
“Do you ever notice how content children are? How it doesn’t take much to please them?”
“Okay, what are you talking about?” he asked, sounding annoyed.
“Nothing. Start talking.”
“You know back in high school when Liv and Bryan were dating?”
“Yeah, get to the point,” I responded, impatient.
“Liv and I were close, very close friends,” he said, emphasizing the word friends. “One night she came over, very upset about a fight she had with Bryan. She entrusted in me that she really wanted to make love to Bryan, but Bryan wanted to wait until marriage.”
“Until marriage? I didn’t know that.”
“You didn’t know you were his first?”
“No. I don’t think I was.”
“Really, then who was?”
I sat there for a moment, thinking about who he told me he slept with. “I guess I just always thought he slept with Olivia.”
Was he really a virgin when he slept with me? If so, how did I not know?
“Anyway, like I said, she came over upset. She was vulnerable, I was horny, one thing led to another and…you know.”
He nodded his head at me. I rolled my eyes back.
“Okay, continue the story.”
“She never told me she was pregnant
until right before you and I slept together.”
Hearing him say we slept together made me want to vomit.
“Wait a minute, she didn’t tell you she was pregnant?”
“No, right after my dad was diagnosed with Leukemia, she called me and told me I had to break the two of you up and told me we had a son.”
“Wow, what is that girl’s problem with me?”
“It has nothing to do with you. She is totally obsessed with Bryan. Anyway, Travis was nine by the time she told me about him. I told her I would do it after my dad was doing better, then he died. I was so upset after he died, I went to Liv’s house and demanded she let me see my son. She told me the only way she would is if I did something for her and I agreed.”
“You slept with me,” I said under my breath.
“Let me finish. I fell in love with Travis. He meant the world to me. That night, we played video games and colored for hours. The next morning, Liv gave me a Roofie and told me I needed to get you alone and slip it in your drink. The two of you were obviously married at the time, so she knew it would take something really big to break the two of you up.”
“You Roofed me!” I screamed, getting up and glaring at him.
He stood up shyly, looking around to make sure people weren’t staring.
“How could you? How could you?” I repeated, not caring who heard or how loud I was. “Did you rape me? You know it is considered rape if the person you are sleeping with is drugged, right?”
I was pretty sure my face was bright with fury, I could feel the anger pulsating in my veins, my hands now fists at my side.
“Sit down, sit down, Dez. Let me finish, please. I did not rape you, I promise.”
“You didn’t rape me?”
He was so confusing.
“No, I wouldn’t rape you, give me some credit here. I set it up to look like you had sex with me. At first, Liv wanted me to tell Bryan we slept together, but I just couldn’t ruin our friendship. I begged her to just let it eat at you. I’m so sorry, Destiny, I just knew it would kill you. I mean, you carrying a secret like sleeping with his best friend would tear the two of you apart. I know there is no way I could ever make it up to you, but I owe you this explanation. I was so selfish.”
My anger turned to a loud whisper as I leaned over the table.
“All this time I thought I cheated on my husband and you set me up? You ruined years of my marriage for your own selfish advantage? How could you? What did I do to you to make you think this was okay?”
“Dez, I know, I’m so sorry,” he said, his eyes tearing up.
“You’re sorry? You’re sorry? You made my child have an unhappy home life because you were afraid your son would grow up without you? Ugg, what about the day you threatened me at the office? Casey, you broke into my house and snuck into my bedroom,” I said, my voice getting louder.
He put his hand on my arm and I jerked it away.
“Don’t you dare.”
“Please let me finish. I know you are angry. It was Liv’s idea for me to hire you. At first she wanted me to try to make you fall in love with me, but I just couldn’t. I know it seems like the way I bullied you was horrible, but could you imagine if I would have constantly hit on you?”
“It woulda been a lot easier, Casey, I would never be interested in you. You are definitely not my type. I would rather die then look at your pitiful face ever again. What makes you think I could ever think of you that way? You know I love Bryan.”
“I tried to scare you away from him, warn you. You were too strong, your love was too strong.”
“Why are you telling me all of this? What do you get out of this, Casey?”
“She’s horrible to Travis, just horrible. She makes him clean the house, do the laundry, cook dinner.”
“So, she’s teaching him independence, my mom made me clean too when I was his age.”
“No, it’s not like that. She is crazy, seriously crazy. She locks herself in her bedroom and only comes out to scream at Travis and tell him everything he’s doing wrong. Dez, she hates him because he’s my son and not Bryan’s. She drinks all the time and sometimes she hits him. He cries all the time, I can’t just give up on him right now.”
“I’m sorry, Casey, I had no idea. It still doesn’t excuse you for what you did to Bryan and me. That poor boy. She really is crazy and now she is trying to win over my husband’s heart and there is nothing I can do about it.”
He looked nervous.
“What’s the catch, Casey? I know there is something you need from me.”
“Destiny, do you want him back?”
“I don’t need your help,” I said through my clenched jaw.
“I know you don’t, but I need yours. Did you tell Bryan about what I said yesterday.”
“No I didn’t, actually. Against my better judgment.”
“I know you’re angry, just listen. If you can just hold out a little bit longer. Olivia was so happy I broke the two of you up, she promised me she will sign the paperwork giving me full custody of Travis. She doesn’t want Bryan to know about him. She said as long as I move away and never tell Bryan the truth.”
“Doesn’t she care about her child at all?”
“I told you she’s obsessed with Bryan. I promise I will tell Bryan everything, right after she signs the papers. I will literally drop off the paperwork and go tell him immediately.”
“Why should I trust you?”
“Because I need to make this right with you and with my best friend, I just don’t want Travis in the middle either.”
“What’s the point? Bryan doesn’t love me like that anymore,” I said, putting my chin to my chest and covering my eyes with my hands.
“Maybe that’s true, but the truth will set you free.”
I stood up from the table and put my sunglasses on.
“I’m doing this for Travis and for Bryan. I am not doing this for you, Casey. What you did ruined me. I hope you can no longer sleep at night and from the rings under your eyes, you may just have a conscience after all.”
I turned around and walked out the door without another word. How long was I going to have to wait before Bryan could finally know the truth. If I saw them kiss one more time, so help me god.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
“Well, how did it go?” Jill asked, anxiously waiting by the door when I got there.
“What, did you wait right there the whole time I was gone?”
“No, there is a Home Improvement marathon on. I have been watching it since you left, then I heard you pull up. So, how did it go?”
I told her about my conversation with Casey and she seemed to believe his story.
“Well, you are doing the right thing. What’s a few more days without telling Bryan? I mean, Casey is a jerk, but it’s obvious she doesn’t care very much about her kid. It explains why he’s been so crazy. I can’t believe after all of this, you never even slept with him. I bet it’s killing you. Not being able to tell Bryan you didn’t cheat on him?”
“Yeah, well, I’m pretty sure it won’t change anything. I am worried he is falling for Olivia. Do you think he is?” I asked, taking a bottle of water out of her fridge.
“I dunno, but I think he will definitely be relieved. You are doing the right thing here.”
“I hope so. Where’s Mom?”
Jill patted down her too short pleated skirt.
“She went home right after you left around noon. She wanted to get some sleep and I told her we would pick her up after you got home.”
“Jill! What if Dad shows up?”
“Destiny, you know Mom, she wasn’t taking no for an answer, what could I do? You know how stubborn she is when she makes up her mind about something. And she told me I couldn’t come with, so I waited for you.”
“Thanks a lot,” I said, grabbing my jacket and nudging her into the fridge.
“Hey!” she called back, laughing.
Mom had three garbages stacked on her front porch, t
he smell of rotten food made us both hold our breath as we got closer.
“Yuck, Jill. I wonder what the inside of her house looks like,” I said as we exchanged glances.
“I’ll bring these out to the dumpster and meet you inside.”
“You sure you can carry them? Need some help?”
“No, go ahead.”
“Mom!” I yelled, opening up her front door. I walked into the kitchen, “Mom?” I made my way up the stairs, beer bottles all over her house. Luckily our house wasn’t this bad growing up, then again, Jill and I were always cleaning up after her.
Her bedroom door was shut. I knocked as I peeked my head in, “Mom.”
I saw three open bottles of pills on her bed and a bottle of whisky tipped over. I grabbed the bottle and shook her. I touched her hand, it was limp and felt cold. I jerked her body on her back, she looked so pale. I felt her face, ice cold. My heart began beating rapidly as I shook her harder.
“Mom!” I screamed, blood curdling scream. “Mom wake up!” I yelled as loud as I could.
“No. No. No.” I heard Jill mutter behind me as she made her way to the bed.
I tried to feel for her pulse, but I could only feel the beat of my own when I touched her. I shook her again.
“Mom, wake up, Mom!” Jill screamed behind me.
“Call nine-one-one Jill, call nine-one-one, now!”
I picked up her limp body and dragged her to the floor. She didn’t even seem heavy. I felt for her sternum, placed my two fingers underneath, then adjusted my hands so my fingers were interlocking and began CPR. Thirty compressions to two breaths. I was exhausted by the time the paramedics got there and took over. I had to leave the room as they huddled around her with a gurney. It didn’t matter, there was no room for us.
Jill and I stood outside hugging as the paramedics took her away. We both knew she wasn’t breathing. We both knew she was gone. We were too late.
“Let’s go,” Jill said, making her way to my car.
I picked up my cell phone and Jill nodded her head in agreement as I dialed Bryan’s number in.
The Deception of Destiny: A Novel Page 9