by K. T Fisher
"Aw Kendal this is so romantic! You can re unite. After all these years."
I panic, it can't be that simple can it? Yes I still love him and in a perfect world I would to be back in Jax's arms but his probably a completely different person now. His a huge famous rockstar and I'm still me and I kept a massive secret from him. It doesn't matter if he still loves me or not, I'm going to hurt him when he finds out. Tanya, my ever so protective friend when it comes to the Jax subject finishes my hair and steps in.
"It's not that simple though, they have had a lot of time apart. Kendal's tried to move on and I bet Jax has."
"Well yes but it's not worked out for either of them because there still single and that's because they still love each other."
There both speaking the truth but I have no idea what to say but try anyway.
"Look, tonight is a meeting so there's no tension on Saturday. I will meet him after the wedding and tell him everything and hopefully he won't hate me too much and we can at least be friends for Finley's sake but I'm not expecting anything and I don't think I could anyway."
Maisy and Sophie frown at me but Jessica and Tanya are nodding there agreement. Maisy and Sophie are the helpless romantics here and just want me to fall back in Jax's arms and we all be a happy little family but Jessica and Tanya are the realists. They have always been the ones to fight my corner first with this subject even when I know they are the ones who disagree with what I did the most out of everyone. Maisy speaks up.
"But if he forgave you and you still love him, why can't you be together?"
Jessica scoffs and replies.
"Erm because his some huge rockstar now who goes everywhere and she would probably hardly ever see him."
Well shit I didn't think of that.I decide to speak for myself.
"It's not just that. I have been trying to move on for four years, I didn't think I would see him again. It's going to be really weird seeing him again. I can't just be with him straight away no matter how much I want to. I need to get used to seeing him again first. And then there's Finley, his going to go from not seeing Jax to then suddenly having him in his life all of a sudden. It will confuse him if suddenly me and Finley are a couple straight away, he has to get used to seeing his dad first."
Everyone's quiet for a few minutes.
"I'm sorry Kendal."
"I didn't think of that, sorry."
"Honey it's going to be fine."
"We're here for you always."
They fuss about me to help get me ready. My hair looks silky straight and we all go to my room to look at what to wear. There's three dresses layed out on my bed and we're all looking at them thinking hard. Sophie has asked Jax where his taking me and his taking me to Eclipse! It's the most fanciest and expensive restaurant in town and I have never been there. It where all the super rich go so obviously not me. You have to look the part to get inside and I've always heard you book months in advance. How the hell did he get a table there in such short notice? So now we know where I am going we have narrowed it down to three dresses. Number one is my navy dress, it has elbow length sleeves, it hugs my curves and ends just below my knees. Number two is a red dress that is sleeveless, also figure hugging and ends just above my knees. Number three is a black dress, it's a one shoulder strap that swoops across my chest, its squeezes my boobs and tummy and then goes loose above my bottom and then finishes knee length.
"You need to look sexy."
Sophie nods at Tanya.
"But also sophisticated"
Jessica holds up the black dress and shakes her head no.
"I don't think this one is right."
We all agree so it's between navy and the red. There both gorgeous dresses but the navy dress is more safe and the red is more daring and out there. I'm hoping they choose navy, I'm not feeling brave enough for the red sexy one. Obviously I'm out voted and they all choose the red dress, Tanya throws it at me and demands I put it on. I slip it on and zip up the zipper at the side under my right arm. I look in my full length mirror and smile inside, I do look good. Sexy but not in your face slutty sexy. The dress hugs my body like it's made for me. The girls all give me a thumbs up with huge smiles and then Jessica opens my shoe cupboard. I keep most my shoes with Finley's downstairs in the shoe cupboard but my best heels are kept in my room. I'm thinking black heels but Sophie reaches for my shiny nude coloured five inch heels. When I look in the mirror, I agree. They look amazing together. It's 9:15 when we all go back downstairs, I'm a wreck right now, in fifteen minutes Jax will be here. At my house, to take me to dinner. Fucking hell! Maisy places a big glass in front of me. I raise my eyebrows.
"A big glass of Vodka and Lemonade is what you need right now."
It's my favourite drink to chill me out so I quickly thank her and get to drinking. The girls try and talk to me but I feel sick. Should I really be doing this? The girls are leaving when I go but Jessica is staying to watch on Finley. Sam will be over soon to keep her company. Oh my god I'm so nervous, my stomach is in knots.
"Guys do you think I'm over dressed?"
They frown and say the same.
"No!"
"You don't think I look too sexy do you?"
They all smile and again say the same thing.
"Yes."
What? I look too sexy? I don't want to look desperate like I want Jax to jump me. Maybe I do but that is not happening. I get up to look at my dresses again when there's a knock at my front door. Oh shit. At the same time I feel my phone vibrate.
Chapter 18
~Jax~
I can't believe my luck that Kendal wants to meet up tonight. I would rather have taken her out all day and spoiled her like I wished I could have when we were together but I'll take what I can get. I booked the best place in town, not only to impress Kendal but at Eclipse I can make sure we have a private table. Well worth the money, of course I have to dress up a bit but I'm not wearing suit trousers and a tie. That's not me and Kendal knows that, I've told the restaurant I'm not that guy too and assured them that I can more than afford to eat there. Once I told them who I was they didn't care what I wore, they just wanted me there. Now they know it's me there's no stopping them tipping the press off for free publicity.
When I pull up in front of Kendal's house I realize how close I was to finding her last night. I feel like a nervous virgin teenager on his first date. What's wrong with me? I know Kendal, I still love her and I haven't seen her yet and I know I want her to be mine again. I hope tonight goes smoothly, I want to be on her good side, I will have no chance in getting her to love me again if she hates me. I go and knock on her front door and wait, I hope she hasn't changed her mind. I'm dying to see her, Rhys snook her camera to me last night so I could look at photos from Sophie's hen trip. I was amazed at how she looks, she's fucking gorgeous and I was so angry at some of the pictures. She was dancing with guys or they would be guys drooling over her in the back of the photos and don't get me started on the lap dance photos. If I see that guy who was sat with a smug smile on his face while Kendal was bent over, I would love to punch him in his face. All the other photo's either made me smile or made me so hard and horny I had to relief myself in the shower. Ho many men saw her sexy little body in bikinis and short dresses and those little shorts that showed her delicious legs. I can feel myself getting hard again, she will be here soon I make myself forget the pictures so I don't have a hard on when she answers the door. I hear a clicking and when the door opens all thought of no hard on's is long forgotten, I just hope she can't see it. Fucking hell, Kendal was beautiful when I last saw her but now she's absolutely gorgeous and unbelievably sexy. Red hair gone replaced by plum but I don't care she still looks perfect. We seem to be just standing and staring at each other. I let my eyes wonder down her body, fucking hell, she looks edible. She has a red dress on that makes me want to rip it straight off. She clears her throat.
"Hi Jax."
She looks really nervous. I don't want her to be nervous.
/> "Hey Kendal, you look amazing."
Absolutely fuckable. But I can't say that. She ducks her head and blushes. Kendal blushing? She would have laughed it of four years ago. She closes the door behind her and steps outside, she's close enough now I can smell her perfume.
"Shall we get going?"
She nods and walks by my side to the car. A girl this stunning will definitely be with someone. I will have to see to that. Kendal has always and will always be mine. I open up her door and she smiles as I shut it behind her once she's sat down. I get in beside her and she's on her phone, I manage to get a little peak and see the words 'Miss you sexy' motherfucker has texted her while she's with me.
"Nice car."
She looks around at my car nodding. I laugh at her, I think she forgets I know that she knows nothing about cars.
"It's and Aston Martin DB9 if you wana show of and tell ya boyfriend."
Her eyebrows raise and I feel shit for saying that but she smiles.
"I don't have a boyfriend Jax."
"Really?"
"Really."
Well that's made my night. I can't help the smile as I drive from her house and to the restaurant. Thankfully there's no paparazzi outside and we are shown to out private table straight away. I walk behind Kendal so I can get a glimpse of that amazing arse I have so many good memories about. I feel her stiffen as I place my hand on the bottom of her back. All I can think of is 'you better get used to it' because this is the least I want to do right now. Wow her arse looks so juicy in that dress. I press move my body closer so the men we pass can't admire it.
~Kendal~
Shit! Shit! Shitty shit shit! Was what I was thinking when I opened my front door. Jax looks so much more sexy standing in front of me than in his pictures. His definitely been working out in the past four years, his shoulders look wider and more rounded with muscle. I smile inwardly when I see his hair is in it's usual mess that I've always seen it in since the day I met him. It's also the messy head of hair our son has inherited which makes my heart melt for this man in front of me. I feel like laughing when I see his not stuck to the dress code for tonight at all, well he does look smarter than in the pictures I saw of him from the music awards. His wearing tight black skinny jeans, I try and ignore the rush of lust when I notice his jeans are a little stretched in his crotch area. So he likes what I'm wearing huh? Well me too as my eyes take the rest of him in, my eyes leave his crotch and travel up to his chest, his wearing a plain white top but it hugs his muscled torso so deliciously. I can see the shape of his pecks and I swallow hard. His wearing a blazer type jacket, it's black but the sleeves and the collar around the neck and down the front of the jacket is a black leather material. It hugs his big shoulders and arms. I feel happy when I see he still loves his high top converse as I see them on his large feet. This gorgeous man still effects me so much I'm fighting myself to run into his arms and let him hold me.
My happy feeling was crushed when I got into his ridiculously expensive sexy sports car and read the text I received before I came out the house. It's from Harley.
HARLEY: Hi Kendal, I hope we can have that catch up soon because I really do miss U sexy xx
When Jax got into the car I quickly put my phone back in my bag and tried to start up a conversation. The only thing I could think of was his car and I know fuck all about cars so that was a fail but at least I made Jax laugh. I was shocked when he told me I can tell my boyfriend, where the hell did he get that idea from? Or was he just fishing? But I did noticed his tone was a little angry when he asked but he seemed to relax when I told him I'm single. Odd, why would he care? I bet he could have any woman he wants. Why me? The girl he had years ago and then left him. When we pulled up at Eclipse I was gobsmacked. This place is amazing, it's a mixture of being high class and with a modern style twist. I do notice when we greet the young girl who shows us to our table she quickly undoes her top button of her blouse and adjusts her tits. She flashes her smile at Jax and doesn't even look at me. As we follow her I feel Jax place his hand on the small of my back and my whole body is aware of his hand and his body getting closer to mine. The sparks are still there between us, how can that be? Four years apart and as soon as were together again the pure sexual need returns like we have never been apart.
Eclipse restaurant is well known for it's food and high class but also they host private areas for a more intimate setting. So I should have known Jax would choose a private area for tonight. The young flirtatious woman, who keeps looking back to take a peak at Jax, leads us to the far corner of the downstairs seating area to a large elevator. She clicks the button and turns around to face us. Well, I say face us, she only has eyes for Jax. This is one of the other reasons I decided it was time to leave Jax, the girls were obvious back then, now there dam right in your face. He is standing here with me and she's still flirting. Talking to him and fluttering her eyebrows and ever so innocently touching her rounded bicep. He still has his hand on my back for crying out loud! You could actually think we were a couple if you didn't know the truth about us but that doesn't faze miss-flirt-a-lot here. Skank.
Thankfully the elevator doors open and we both step in leaving the skank outside. She pouts at us and then looks back to where she should be standing. Torn between doing her job and staying with Jax.
"You will be greeted by someone upstairs, or I can come and help you Jax?"
I scoff and she gives me an irritated look and then quickly looks back to Jax. Before I can give her a piece of my mind Jax steps in.
"No thanks, I'm here with my very beautiful lady here and I don't want to be disturbed."
The elevator doors shut in her face and I burst out laughing.
"I'm sorry about that Kendal."
I stop laughing and see his frowning down at the floor. I touch his arm and smile at him, he feels bad for me having to go through miss skank out there.
"Jax, it's fine. I'm just glad you stepped in before I said what I wanted to."
I laugh again and I'm glad to hear Jax does too. That dam sexy deep man chuckle he does. We look at each other and stop laughing, this feels nice. Not awkward at all, I realize that with Jax gone, I not only lost my boyfriend. I lost my best friend. Yes the girls and my guys are my best friends too but with Jax we had that connection. We were friends and lovers, we were in love. I know I still love him, I thought I did but now I have seen him again I know I haven't fell out of love with him. When he told the girl downstairs that I'm his very beautiful lady it made me feel very happy. That happy that I can feel my pants a little damp from my excitement. The doors open and break me from my sexual thoughts and I look to the man who is waiting for us. He takes my hand as I step out and gives me a big smile,
"Can I show you to your table Miss?"
A hand touches the lower of my back and I know it's Jax by how my body responds to him.
"Yea, please do."
The mans eyes widen a little and he clears his throat. Jax pulls me away from the stranger and we walk side by side to where our private room is. There's about five doors up here and he takes us to the nearest one and opens the door. The room is beautiful decorated in light blue and white, in the middle is a big white table all set up and ready for us.
Chapter 19
~Jax~
I feel like such a dick! Only ten minutes with me and Kendal has already had to deal with that shit. I know there just fans but this is one of the reasons Kendal gave me before she ran away from me. I'm happy she laughed though but I could have killed that jackass who tried to take her from me when we got out the lift. Kendal is a beautiful woman so obviously guys will hit on her but not anymore. Especially when I'm around.
We have boring chit chat after we order our food and now Kendal's looking a little awkward sat opposite me.
"Thanks for coming with me. You didn't have to."
She looks up at me and smiles but I know it's forced.
"That's OK, I came here so it wouldn't be awkward on Saturday."
> Well I'm going to ignore the sting from that.
"So how you been? What have you been doing these past four years?"
She shuffles in her chair a little, interesting.
"Nothing special. Working and all that. Tell me about you, I bet your story is more interesting than mine."
"Not really. I can't really trust anyone. I just have the guys to keep me company and Sophie of course. I knew you two would get on great."
She nods and puckers her lips, something she does when she's thinking.
"That can't be nice, I bet it doesn't stop you getting laid though. Her downstairs for example."
She's jealous I know it and I could dance it makes me feel that good. Why does she sound angry about it? This is what she wanted.
"I'm not going to lie about that but you can't tell me you haven't had sex with anyone since we split up."