“Wait so you’re telling me I didn’t get laid because I sent the wrong flowers,” he said changing the subject. “Fuck, now what?”
As Tess and my brother discussed the alternatives, Kaden continued watching me. Was he checking out the shiner his ex-wife had given me? Wait, why was he here at the flower shop?
“We can cancel them,” Tess said, “but reimburse you?” she twisted her lips to the side looking at the screen.
“I know you won’t reimburse me the money. The lady who took my order over the phone explained that I had to pay a month in advanced and that if I cancelled, it wouldn’t be reimbursed. I just want to stop the service.”
Tess looked at her father who shrugged. “So, you just want to cancel it?” My brother nodded a couple of times.
She clicked the mouse a few times and smiled. “Done. Is there something else we can do for you?”
Camden shook his head and left.
“Thank you,” I said, waving at Tess. “It was great seeing you.”
I followed behind my brother. Once I got in the car, my phone vibrated.
Tess H: Sorry about the black eyes. You look like an adorable panda.
I looked at my phone, then checked my contacts and there it was. Tess H’s phone which I assumed it was Tess Hades.
Gage: How did you get my number?
Tess H: While you were driving us home, you let me see your phone. I texted your number to my phone and then programmed mine in yours.
For some fucking reason this made me happy. Everything that had happened up until this point didn’t matter. I had a way to reach her.
Gage: Just so you know, I prefer raccoons. They’re badasses.
Tess H: What happened to you? You disappeared yesterday without saying goodbye.
Gage: I didn’t want to intrude. You guys had a lot going on.
Tess H: Thank you for your help, it meant a lot to me.
Gage: How are you and your sister doing?
Tess H: Hannah’s transferring schools. Dad’s dealing with my mother.
Gage: When are you free? I want to take you out for dinner.
She didn’t respond for a long time, it wasn’t until we arrived at Camden’s place that my phone buzzed again, and I finally let out a big breath.
Tess H: Maybe Friday. We’re swamped, and I have a few deliveries to make.
Nine
Gage
“Hmm, I imagined this differently when you pushed the penthouse button in the elevator,” Tess said.
“Different how?”
“Well, it’s you and your brother from what you mentioned. That means a wall to wall flat-screen TV, a big leather couch, and pizza boxes all over the place.” She grinned.
The living and dining room were elegant in a minimalist sort of way. We had an elongated table that dominated the area. Our sixty-five-inch television was mounted to the wall and surrounded by a leather sectional.
“Camden’s room has a mirrored ceiling and wall to wall television.” I didn’t tell her about the cameras he had installed for his nightly visitors. “But he likes to keep this area simple and presentable for the family.”
“Soda, beer, hard lemonade, or water?”
“Wait, I can have a beer?”
“Of course, we’re not at a bar. You’re with a friend, and I doubt a beer would get you drunk.”
“I’ll take the soda, but thanks for offering.” She continued looking around and picked up a PS4 remote on the coffee table. “How long have you guys lived here?”
“Cam got this place a couple of years ago with our brother, Keane.”
“Keane?” She frowned. “You have two brothers?”
I showed her four fingers. “No, I have four and a sister.”
“And you live with carnation boy,” she said, studying the movie list.
“Yes, just moved in this past weekend.” I chuckled. It was a great nickname we could use on him. “What did you call him?”
“We call him carnation boy because of his order.”
“How come you work there?”
“My stepmom owns the shop. Dad’s worked there ever since they met.”
I stared at her confused. “Why would he work there?”
She rolled her eyes. “That’s how much he’s loved her since they met.” She shrugged. “I guess that’s why. He’s a hopeless romantic. Hannah and I pitch in and earn some extra money. In fact, after I graduated I took a year off and worked for her full time.”
“You also work at some academy.”
“Yes, three times a week.” She smiled at me. “I’m an assistant to the tap and ballet for toddlers’ class. I still need to find a third job to match your super human abilities. Construction, huh?”
“It’s just until I find something solid.”
“Like what?”
It was on the tip of my tongue to tell her about my dreams. I didn’t. It’d add me to the string of guys who befriended her just to get closer to her father. I wanted to be with her and around her because she was different from any other girl I’d known.
Instead of boring her with my life, we climbed the staircase heading to the second story and my bedroom where we set up a picnic on the carpet.
“So why do you live with your brother?” She doesn’t wait for my answer. “Are you going back to teaching?”
“Are we playing twenty questions?”
“Twenty is not enough,” she said as she stared at the floor to ceiling window. “You’re a bartender, a barista, a teacher, and now a construction guy. Your full name is Gage Alexander Rodin.”
“You know a lot about me,” I said impressed.
“My sister told me. You have a pretty cool name. You went to Julliard. I mean, it’s Julliard, and yet you’re not playing for the Seattle Symphony Orchestra. I think you’re here trying to find yourself.”
“What does that mean?”
“You go through life learning, but without a goal in mind.” She shrugged. “Maybe I’m wrong.”
“There’s a goal, Tess. The dream is out there,” I told her.
“I do like to learn,” I agreed. “Grad school was my limit. Do you know that Canada is the most educated country in the world? We’re number six, right behind the British empire.”
“They’re not an empire,” she corrected me.
“But it sounds pretty cool to call them that. You’re in college, right?” I flipped the spotlight toward her.
“Yes, I study Marine Biology in San Diego.”
“Why not here? We have a pretty good program at WSU.”
“No one knows me down there,” she said without further explanation.
“Because of your dad?”
She nodded. “And my mother has no idea where to find me.”
“She’d be acting like she did with Hannah?”
“Uh-huh…You still haven’t told me why you moved in with your brother.”
“I broke up with my on-and-off girlfriend at almost the same time the lease was up.”
“Didn’t you renew it?” She scrunched her nose.
“I thought she did. This was the first time I was staying in the same apartment with her long enough to renew the lease—or so I thought.”
Fuck, I sounded like an irresponsible idiot but honestly, I trusted Marti when she volunteered to go to the management office. I’m pretty sure she’d already planned on leaving with or without me.
“How long did you guys date?”
I told her my story while we ate. How I met Marti in high school and we broke up when I moved to Boston. Then, our first reunion.
“If it’s over, it’s over. Why did you take her back?”
“It’s pretty hard to date someone when you’re in college. Between classes I either worked or practiced. There was no time. She came back and … she felt comfortable,” I explained.
“That’s a pretty sad reason to stay with someone. Wouldn’t you want to be with a person who makes your heart skip and your chest explode with joy? A person who�
��ll fill your stomach with butterflies just because you know they exist even if they aren’t near. The thoughts of her will invade your mind all day and night.”
Make my dick hard when she’s close by and my mind wander at night because I’m thinking of having her right next to me. Just the way you do? I wanted to ask.
Fuck, I suddenly stopped myself reminded of the time when Marti came back for a couple of months while I was in New York, and she was dating another guy. What if someone is waiting for Tess in San Diego?
“Do you have a boyfriend?”
“Nope.”
“Wow, say it like you mean it. I didn’t offer you broccoli or drugs.”
She laughed. “Sorry, it’s complicated. The guys I’ve gone out with haven’t worked out, and then there’s my abusive mother who messed with my head. I try to avoid entanglements because you never know when the person you’re with is just using you. I don’t trust anyone.”
That was a tough subject to broach, and I decided to keep things light for the evening. It’s not like something would happen between us. She was about to leave for San Diego, and I had no idea what life had in store for me.
“What do you plan to do after graduation?”
“Get a master’s degree. I’m not sure how I want to apply my degree once I’m ready to work. My goal is to save the oceans. They cover seventy percent of the surface of our planet. And hold ninety seven percent of our water. If we don’t save them, we’re doomed.”
“You like facts?” I stared at her, grinning stupidly.
Tess Hades was my kind of girl.
“Yeah, I know. It’s weird.” She fidgeted with her bottom lip waiting for me to laugh or something. Instead, there was a feeling I didn’t want to acknowledge brewing inside my chest, making my heart pump faster.
“Not at all, and if it is, then we’re a couple of weirdos.” I winked at her. “Did you always want to save the turtles? You look more like the kind of girl who would want to clone the first unicorn.”
“Don’t get me wrong. I love unicorns, pegasi, and llamas. If I could, I’d create the first living Llamicorn, I would. But I’m more of a narwhal kind of girl.”
“Those are the whales that live in Iceland with the big tooth that looks like a horn,” I said thrilled, and I had no idea why. Maybe it was her excitement.
“You’ve heard of them, huh?” she said impressed. “But they live in the Arctic waters of Canada, Greenland, Norway, and Russia. I’m going to spend a semester in Vancouver, and hopefully I’ll be able to score an internship in Nunavut.”
“When?”
“I’m applying for next summer, but I’ll take whatever they give me,” she continued.
“Did you always want to be a marine biologist?”
She nodded with conviction. “Yeah. My mother wanted me to be an actress. Though, one of my acting teachers said I should follow my dreams. Hence, I stopped going and spent the time volunteering at the Nature Conservancy.”
“You’re different from what I imagined.”
“Who are you, Gage Rodin? I don’t think you’re following your dream. Unless it’s being an overworked super human.”
She rose from her seat and looked around the cluttered room stopping right in front of the few instruments I was able to bring with me.
“You play violin?” Tess picked up the bow and pointed at me. “See, an orchestra might be your thing.”
Then, she placed the bow next to the violin and grabbed my guitar. “I assume this is your favorite?”
“No, that’s the only one I have with me. The other two are in storage. My biological mother gave it to me when the divorce was finalized. It was like a final goodbye. She gave Easton and Camden a football. And a building blocks set to Keane.”
“Do you see her?”
“Sometimes,” I said gruffly. I wasn’t in the mood to be with my family tonight.
“You’re not a fan I assume,” she continued her questions game.
“I love her because she’s my mother, but I care more for Emily, Dad’s wife. She’s been looking after us since we moved to Seattle. Dad’s a cop.”
“Sounds like an interesting story. The nanny who fell for the cop.”
“Not exactly. She lived across the hall and babysat us when Dad had to work late.”
She narrowed her gaze and waited. I shrugged, saying, “I guess you’re right.”
“This is Marti?” Tess picked a frame that was inside of a box with all the shit Marti left behind.
“Yeah.”
“She’s beautiful. Will you take her back when she’s done with her next adventure?”
“No, I’m ready to take a risk.” I said with conviction. I wasn’t going to settle anymore. “That’s everything she left behind. I’m not sure what to do with it.”
“You should take a risk on your career too,” she suggested, sounding like my brothers. Then, she set the box outside. “You should toss it, there’s no point in holding onto something you’re not passionate about. We’re supposed to hold onto the objects that remind us of our future, our goals, and that make us burn with desire.”
She looked at me. “What do you need, Gage?”
“What do I need for what?” I stared at her, absorbing her words. She was right. Why did I hold onto something I didn’t care for anymore?
“Launch your career.” She strummed the string of my guitar and then grabbed it.
Tess knew how to hold it. I bet the girl could play like her father.
“Well, it’s obvious that you like music,” she said. “Maybe love it. If that’s your passion, you should pursue it. Dad always says that you should pursue your passion and the opportunities will fall into place.”
I let out a hard exhale and said, “I’m planning on auditioning at the Silver Moon next week for their Friday features. Easton’s loaning me some money to make a new demo. I just wrote a new song.”
“Ah-ha, I knew it. You’re not a music teacher, but you were giving up.” She pressed her lips together and shook her head. “Wait, you think you have to spend money to make a demo?” She sounded appalled.
“Yes,” I snorted. She’s smart and all, but still a rich kid. “I have to pay for the recording studio. They charge by the hour.”
“What you need is access to a recording studio,” she said, as if one was different from the other. She was making no sense.
She handed me my guitar. “Play for me.”
“I invited you to dinner. I’m not going to serenade you. We’re not at that stage in our relationship. If you want music, I can use my phone or how about you play for me?” I dared her.
“I’ll play first,” she said, her gaze holding mine. She licked her lips and smiled. The vixen was flirting with me. “But only if you promise to be next.”
She strummed the guitar and sang an old Killing Hades song. Her voice was beautiful, low, soft, and enchanting. As the notes and the lyrics hung in the air, our gazes locked. Her eyes spoke volumes to me. I could sense her hunger. The same desire I felt for her seemed to radiate just as fiercely from her eyes. I wanted to make her mine. My soul began to breathe her name, and my heart beat to the rhythm of her guitar. When she finished the song, I knew she was going to steal my heart if I wasn’t careful.
“Your turn,” she said, staring at the guitar.
Was she feeling the connection? Could she feel me deep inside her soul too?
“Are you sure that marine biology is your calling?”
She nodded.
“Because you could have a music career,” I suggested.
“Nope, that requires real talent. I just know how to do it because I’ve watched Dad play since I was born. Now it’s your turn.”
“Tess,” I said, not accepting the guitar.
“Please? Hannah’s mentioned that you have an incredible voice.”
Hesitantly, I grabbed the guitar and began to play the song I wrote the prior Tuesday.
And there you were
Finally, I found you
The world blurred around us
You’re not just anyone
You’re my only one
My love
Always love
It’s in the air.
As I played each chord, my soul came alive. Our gazes locked. Our eyes made love to each other, like a couple of long-lost lovers who had finally found each other. I didn’t want to lose the feeling, the magic happening between us. Once the song ended, she walked toward the door, as if ready to jet out and forget what had just happened between us.
“I owe you something,” she said, almost like she forgotten why she’d come to see me. “Be at my house tomorrow night.”
“I work.” I took a step forward.
“Ask for the night off,” she insisted, glaring at me. She wanted to keep her distance. “I swear you won’t regret it.”
“Why tomorrow night?”
“You can use Dad’s studio.”
“Nope, I’m not using someone else’s studio to record the demo. I’ll pay.”
“Then, pay me. I can use the money.”
“What for?” I asked, confused and suspicious.
“Christmas presents. Do you think Dad hands out money just because we want it? He just gives us enough. If we want more, we have to work for it.”
“Hence the two jobs,” I said in confirmation.
Everything made more sense: why she was a down to earth kind of girl, the multiple jobs, and her wanting to do more for other people.
“Yes, I won’t be able to work when I go back to school.”
“If you’re charging me, then yes. It’s a deal.” I extended my hand.
She stared at my arm, then my fingers, and finally she met it with a loud exhale. I grabbed onto her hand, pulling her closer to me. I kissed her on the cheek but didn’t move my lips away. It took a lot of willpower not to consume her.
Tess’s breath hitched. She stepped backward, blushing wildly. I didn’t need Google to tell me that she was affected by me as much as I was by her. Her amber eyes were bright, inviting. I wanted to push her against the wall, press my lips to hers, and claim her. I controlled myself, though. Long distance relationships never worked. I wasn’t about to fight against the odds.
My One Despair Page 5