The thought of two middle-aged women playing cards floated past her. “Oh yes! I remember now! Minerva! How great to see you!”
Minerva grinned at her conspiratorially. “You here to see Campbell after all these years?” She giggled like a schoolgirl.
“Oh no, no, nothing like that.” Lindsey glanced down self-consciously at her left hand with the wedding ring she hadn’t had the courage to remove yet. She slipped her arm behind her back. “I was just going on my regular run, just like always, you know, and thought I’d pass by.… Just a little walk down memory lane and all that. Or run, I guess I should say!” She laughed as though her joke was hilarious. Could she have been more transparent?
Minerva just smiled. “I see. Well, he’s not here, sweetheart. Though I don’t suspect you would want to see him after all these years looking like that.” She gestured dismissively at Lindsey’s gray knit shorts, faded church camp T-shirt, and sweaty ponytail.
A glutton for punishment, she followed up Minerva’s question with a question of her own. “So, Campbell still lives here … in this house?” She wondered if a middle-aged man still living in the house he grew up in was a good thing. Where she came from, it was a sign of dysfunction.
“Yep,” she said, clearly proud of Campbell for still living at home. “He stayed on with his mother to help take care of his daddy when he got cancer the first time—Lord, did his daddy give cancer a run for its money, God rest his soul! For three years he just refused to die. He was such a fighter. Do you remember him?”
Lindsey nodded. But what she remembered most wasn’t the man himself, but how much Campbell looked up to him.
“Anyway, Campbell just never left after his daddy died. No reason to, I guess,” she added. “His mama likes having him around to take care of things. You can imagine.”
Lindsey nodded sympathetically, warning her mouth not to ask the next question even as her lips formed the words. “And his wife and daughter?” she asked, trying desperately to sound like she couldn’t care less. “How are they?”
Minerva didn’t seem to be worried about protecting Campbell’s privacy as she gladly filled Lindsey in. “Oh that woman! She ran off and left him with that little girl years and years ago, just before his daddy got sick. Boy, was that a terrible, terrible year. She eventually came back to get Nikki and took her to live with her. Now she’s married to some hotshot doctor back in Charlotte.” Minerva paused, seeming to weigh her next sentence. “In fact, that’s where Campbell is now. He and his mama left just yesterday to go to Charlotte. Something with his little girl—though she’s not so little anymore, you know. She’s quite the young lady now, about to start college.”
Lindsey nodded in agreement. She sensed there was more that Minerva wasn’t telling her but let it drop. Campbell’s life now was, she knew, none of her business.
“Well now, you don’t want to hear any more from a crazy old woman!” She held her index finger in the air as an idea seized her. “Here’s what we’ll do. You come back this way soon.” She cut her eyes over at Lindsey, waving her hand at her running attire dismissively. “But not in that getup. Why don’t you try to walk by in the evening? Just act like you were out taking a walk and I’ll figure out how to make sure Campbell’s outside. Just leave that to me!” Minerva smiled broadly, revealing a set of teeth that had yellowed with age. She giggled again. “I sure would love for Campbell to see you again. It’d be good for him!” She paused, as if mulling something over. “But now you should get back to your run. Great to see you!” Minerva waved quickly before turning back to her car to remove a large watering can. Lindsey noticed the hitch in the woman’s step as she walked toward the porch.
Obediently, Lindsey turned and ran, shaking her head and chuckling at how odd life can be. She wondered if she would ever have the guts to do what Minerva suggested.
Chapter 14
Sunset Beach
Summer 1991
“I’m sort of surprised that you wanted to come down here with me,” Lindsey said, raising her voice to be heard over the rough surf as she and Grant walked hand in hand down to the water’s edge.
He smiled shyly. “Well, it’s important to you so it’s important to me. I keep hearing you talk about the mailbox, and I wanted to see this place for myself.” He stopped walking to kiss her. “Why? Don’t you want me to come with you?”
“Of course, silly. I’m glad you’re with me. I want you to come along.” Lindsey walked on for a few minutes in silence, wondering why after five years away from Campbell, she would still feel as if she were betraying him by bringing another man to the mailbox with her. Even someone who had become as close to her as Grant had. They had talked about getting married after graduation next year. She wanted to share everything with him. And who would Campbell be to complain about betrayal, anyway?
“So,” Grant said, “what’s his name?”
Lindsey looked at him, confused.
“The guy you’re thinking about right now … his name?” Grant gave a patient smile.
Her eyes widened. “How did you—”
“I’m just smart that way. I can sense things, especially things about you.”
She smiled at how well Grant knew her. But she couldn’t help thinking about Campbell’s last letter to her. He had told her to move on, to find someone to love her, someone who would know her well. Grant was that person. “His name was Campbell,” she said. “And I was fifteen.” She waved her hand in the air. “It was a long time ago. And he and I didn’t last but two summers.” There was much she was leaving out, but did that really matter?
“But the mailbox lasted a lot longer,” Grant said.
“Yes. This place is very special to me. I have come back every summer. I leave a letter here this same week every year. I like to think—” she broke off, blushed—“I like to think that the Kindred Spirit looks forward to my letters every year.” She laughed. “I know that sounds silly.”
He pulled her to him. “If it’s something you take seriously, then I take it seriously.”
She pointed ahead of them. “We’re almost there. I tried to warn you it was a long walk.”
“So, who is the Kindred Spirit?” Grant asked as they walked the last few feet to reach the mailbox.
“That’s what’s so cool. No one knows. Someone comes and takes all the old notebooks out and puts in new ones, replaces all the old pens, and takes the loose letters people write. But the person’s identity is a secret. It’s all very mysterious, which makes it that much more fun, I think. Of course, I feel like I know her after all these years.”
“Her?” Grant asked. “How do you know it’s a ‘her’?”
She grinned. “I don’t. I just suspect it is. It’s like—I don’t know—It’s like I can feel her here, cheering for me. It sounds stupid, I know.” Lindsey made a funny face to deflect her admission.
Grant nodded but said nothing in response as he followed her up to where the mailbox stood in the dunes. She pointed to the notebook and paper in the box, taking a sheet of loose paper for herself and giving Grant the option. He took out a notebook.
“You can write about how much you love me,” she said, teasing him.
He grinned. “Oh, I already have a pretty good idea of what I am going to write,” he responded. He leaned in and kissed her.
Lindsey took a seat on an old log someone had set up as a bench and began to write, while Grant planted himself in the sand. She was thrilled to be there with him. She even felt a bit like the curse of Campbell was being broken once and for all by having him there.
It wasn’t long before Grant walked over and sat down beside her. “I wrote down what I wanted to say,” he said. “Will you read it?”
She looked at him. “Well that was quick,” she said, hoping he wouldn’t ask to read what she had written. Her letters were private, bet
ween her and the Kindred Spirit only. “You sure you want me to read it?”
“Absolutely.” In one fluid motion he laid the open notebook on her lap and got down on one knee in the sand in front of her. There, written on the notebook page were the words “Will you marry me?” She looked up, aghast, as he opened a black velvet box to display a diamond solitaire set in gold. She looked over at the open mailbox and smiled. Grant was perfect for her. He couldn’t have chosen a better place to propose. As she nodded and said yes, she blinked away an unbidden image of Campbell’s face, pushing him back to the past where he belonged.
Summer 1991
Dear Kindred Spirit,
How many years I have dreamed of the day I will write this to you: to share the exciting news that I am getting married! As I look down at the ring on my finger, how it sparkles like it is winking at me, I can hardly believe it’s real. Grant brought me here under the pretense of wanting to see the mailbox, but he had something bigger planned the whole time. Do you see why he is so perfect for me? He knew the perfect place to propose to me. I love that you were part of it and that you are the first person I am telling.
Leave it to me to be a complete klutz as I am being proposed to. After he put the ring on my finger, he pulled me down toward him to kiss me. I lost my balance and fell over onto him, knocking us both into the sand. Talk about graceful! I was laughing and crying at the same time! At one point, I reached up to wipe my tears away and got sand in my eyes. But Grant, still chuckling at my clumsiness (I am so glad he finds it “cute”), reached over with his shirttail and wiped my eyes so gently and lovingly. I knew at that moment I would be safe with this man forever. I am letting myself trust him, believing that he really loves me and that this time it will last.
Well, this letter is going to have to be short because Grant is waiting on me to walk back home. I can’t wait to show my ring off to my aunt and uncle. He said they knew what he was planning and he even talked to my uncle beforehand to ask his permission. Isn’t that so sweet? He is so respectful and considerate. He knows that my uncle is the closest thing to a father that I have. I am going to ask him to give me away at the wedding. I am not even going to think about what my mom is going to say because I don’t want to ruin this happy moment.
Thank you, Kindred Spirit, for bringing Grant to me. I am not sure how all this works, but I like to think you had a hand in it. Well, you and God, I suppose. It’s possible, right?
Until next summer,
Lindsey
Chapter 15
Sunset Beach
Summer 1992
“Daddy, Daddy, look at me!” Campbell’s five-year-old daughter sang out from her perch on the deck railing. “I’m a bird!” She flapped her arms and nearly lost her balance. Campbell sailed across the deck and grabbed her off the railing.
“Nicole Amanda Forrester!” he yelled. “Don’t you ever do that again!”
Crocodile tears filled eyes that were the identical shade of blue as his own. “I’m sorry, Daddy,” she said.
Campbell softened and pulled her to him. “You just have to be careful, baby,” he whispered. “Daddy couldn’t stand it if something happened to you.” He did not add what he was thinking: You’re all I have. He rocked her back and forth until she stopped crying. “Daddy’s sorry for getting so angry,” he said.
She brightened and hopped down from his lap. “It’s okay, I forgive you,” she said. “The Bible says we should always forgive. Did you know that, Daddy?”
He nodded absentmindedly, barely listening. His mother had faithfully taken Nikki to church—something he couldn’t help but respect—but he had always opted out. Lately, Nikki’s mini-sermons had been getting to him more and more. He wondered if he should join her and his mother at church sometime.
“Daddy … are you going to forgive Mommy?”
Campbell was about to suggest they go for a walk on the beach. He stopped short. “What?” he asked her.
“When Mommy comes back. Are you going to forgive her for running away?” Nikki asked, blinking her saucer-sized eyes as she waited for his response.
His mind ran through a thousand answers, none of which he could repeat to his daughter. Ellie should have been grateful he stood by her all these years. Instead the thanks he got was her abandoning them both and running off to God-knows-where with God-knows-who.
“Mommy’s coming back,” Nikki said, matter-of-factly. It had been four months since he came home from work to a note left on his pillow.
“Is that so? How do you know?” He may have been twenty-three years old, but sometimes Nikki seemed wiser than him.
“She and the man talked about it,” Nikki said.
“The man? What man? When?” He walked back over to her and picked her up. “Did you see Mommy?” His mind raced as he tried to decipher what his daughter was saying.
Nikki shook her head no. “Before Mommy went away, she and I went to visit the man. He got me french fries and they talked while I got to have as much ketchup as I wanted. You know how you only let me have a little bit so I won’t get so messy?”
Campbell nodded, dumbfounded.
“Well, Mommy and the man said that they were going on a trip and that she would come back to get me after the trip was over. She said that it was a secret, that I couldn’t tell you. So I didn’t tell you.” Her lip quivered. “But Mommy’s been gone a long time.” She paused. “Do you think Mommy will be mad I told?”
Campbell patted her back. “No, baby, I can promise you Mommy will not be mad.” His blood boiled. He knew Ellie was capable of a lot of sneaky things, but he never would have imagined her involving their daughter in something like this.
As he carried Nikki inside, she brightened. “See, Daddy? Mommy will come back. And then you can forgive her, because the Bible says to forgive.” She patted his cheek. “Then you won’t feel so sad anymore. My Sunday school teacher says forgiving others makes our hearts happy. Do you want your heart to feel happy, Daddy?”
He nodded. “Yes, sweetie.” He smiled at the miracle of his daughter and wished for a moment that Ellie would never come back.
w
Sunset Beach
Summer 1992
Lindsey sat on the beach towel, brooding. She hadn’t felt well for several days and when she mentioned to Grant that she thought she might be pregnant, he told her she was just being dramatic. She wanted him to run out and buy a pregnancy test, waiting breathlessly by her side for the results. She wanted him to put his hand on her stomach and tell her how proud he was to be the father of her child. Instead he said he was going for a run and left her out on the crowded beach, feeling miserable and trying to remember when her last period was. She flopped down on her stomach and stared at the ocean, wondering if she would still be able to lie on her stomach for much longer.
Grant had been so distracted lately. A project at his new job was taking over their lives. He worked late and when he was home, he was distant. She had had to beg him to come down to the beach for their regular vacation time. He wanted to stay at work and even suggested she come down alone or invite Holly. They had compromised with him coming down for half the week and Holly coming down for the other half. He seemed only too happy to forego their precious time together. She didn’t want to dig too deeply into why.
A little girl ran past her and she watched her with interest, wondering idly what it would be like to have a daughter. The girl had hair bleached platinum by the sun, caught into a ponytail on top of her head. She flung a Frisbee with all her might as Lindsey watched it arc into the air. She watched as the little girl’s dad caught the Frisbee with ease and smiled, a smile she still recognized in an instant. A smile, she discovered, that still had the potential to make her heart skip a beat.
She pulled the ball cap she wore down onto her face so that he wouldn’t spot her. She was thankful t
he beach was overflowing with people that day. Tucking the bottom half of her face into her elbow, she watched from a place of anonymity as Campbell threw the Frisbee back toward his daughter. Nikki. She had to be five years old now. She was, Lindsey admitted, beautiful. “I expected nothing less from you,” she said aloud to him, even though he couldn’t hear her.
Her eyes filled with tears as he scooped up his daughter and carried her into the waves with her giggling the whole way, the sound of her laughter carried on the wind. He clearly loved his daughter. He looked happy. He was just fifty feet from her. All this time and she was finally seeing him again. She wanted to freeze time. She watched Campbell put Nikki on his shoulders and make their way down the beach until they got too far away to see, staring in his direction long after he was gone.
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Sunset Beach
Summer 1992
Ellie turned up just a few days later. She marched into Campbell’s office, her whole body tense and ready for a fight. Even as his mind registered her presence, he thought again that it would be better if she just stayed gone.
“I guess this is a surprise to you,” she said.
“Not as big a surprise as you might think,” he responded. “Nikki told me you’d be back. Apparently you felt comfortable involving a five-year-old in your plans to run away from her.”
She tapped her thumb on her thigh, searching for words. For a moment, he thought she would say she wanted to come back. And in that moment, he knew he would agree to let her. For Nikki’s sake. He looked at her and, though she was undoubtedly beautiful, realized anew that he felt nothing for her and never had. Nothing romantic, anyway.
She continued. “Campbell, I am not proud of any of this. But the fact is there’s someone else in my life now. And at first I didn’t know what was going to happen with that. I didn’t want to talk to you about it until I did. But we’ve decided to get married.” She smiled just before she thrust in the knife. “He’s a doctor,” she said, letting it sink in. The unspoken words He’s better than you hanging in the air between them.
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