“You’re funny.”
“You’re pickled.”
“You’re funny and beautiful and so damn sweet,” he told me, his voice ending with a sigh, and I laughed softly as I walked closer to him.
Standing in front of him, I placed my hand on his shoulder, and he pulled me in closer. Our hands met and the sensation made a flurry of butterflies awaken in my stomach. How can his touch do that to me? Even after everything?
“Umm,” my heart was racing. The lines had been blurred between us, but after I put in my notice, I thought they had been written down in cement, yet something as simple as our hands touching made me slightly lightheaded.
“Let me sleep with you?” He asked. His eyes were hooded so I couldn’t see their brown depths and I swallowed hard.
“What?”
“Sleep. All those nights…Kitten, I only sleep well with you in my arms. I keep thinking about it. How you feel,” he pulled me in fast, causing me to land on his lap, and I tried to fight the shivers that ran like live wires down my spine. I tried to fight the impossible fight of my body’s reaction to him, the throaty tone of his voice breaking me, “I need more.”
“Mr. Daven—”I tried to fight to keep my senses about me.
“John. It’s just John.” His forehead was now touching mine. “Please, Anne? Don’t leave me.” His eyes were red and his voice was tortured. “You and Zoey. Stay here with me.”
“John, you hired someone.” He had. Birdie had called me yesterday, shocked that I’d put in my two week notice without telling her.
“I know.”
“We can’t stay.”
“Stay with me. Here with me.” He pulled my hand over his heart, the manic thumping showing me his nervousness.
“Save me.” His gorgeous face in front of me was vulnerable and open. I had no idea how I could make myself walk away from him.
He leaned in and took my lower lip, nipping it slightly, then letting it go.
“John...” I moaned softly into the silence when he let go and leaned his head back against the leather chair. His fingertips started playing with the tips of my hair.
“Your lower lip drives me crazy, Kitten.”
“Why do you call me that?” It wasn’t fair asking him that while he was drunk, but being that close to him, I couldn’t help it. I wanted to know.
“The night I found you, you reminded me of a kitten with claws.”
“What? How?”
“You were hopelessly trying to change that tire—”
“I was not hopeless…”
“And you sounded all lost, and then I said something to you and you brought out the claws, calling me Captain Obvious about the rain.”
“Oh…”
“Now you’re like this sex kitten…”
“What?”
“You purr…” a sexy grin spread over his mouth, “When I kiss you or touch you in certain places...you don’t moan baby, you purr.” His voice was husky and his mouth cuddled at my neck, the stubble on his jaw driving me crazy. He nuzzled my neck, and I took a deep breath. My panties felt wet, and I could feel his hardness below me twitching as if trying to jump free.
“Mmm, like that… you fucking purr, Anne. Fuck, I want you so bad…not having you close by these last couple of weeks has been driving me crazy…”
“I’m not sure we should…” I whispered.
“Please…” He picked me up, and I was now straddling his lap. His eyes were open to slits, staring at me.
“John, you’re drunk…”
“I know. I messed up and hurt you… I just want to hold you…” He wrapped his arms around my back and pulled me down until my head rested on his shoulder. “I want to make it better. I’ll be better, Kitten.” My eyes were on his stubble-covered jaw. I felt him shift in the chair as he tipped his head back. His hands stroked my back. Before I knew it, his hand stopped and just like that, he was out like a light, snoring softly.
I closed my eyes and tried to catch my own breath. Would I have slept with him? Yes. I would have. Stupidly in love with him, I would do anything.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
John
A delicious heavy weight was on top of my body. I opened my eyes slowly, and even the small little men pounding inside of my head could not take away the beauty that was Anne’s body curled into mine, sharing the chair in my office with me. My hands moved to touch her beautiful face.
She knew the truth. She knew and she’d stayed. I watched her open her eyes slowly and smiled at her.
“Good morning.” My voice was raspy with sleep.
“Morning,” she answered me, her eyes guarded, and I hated that I had put that there. “I should go check on Zoey. I didn’t mean to fall asleep,” she mumbled as she got off of me. I immediately missed her body.
I wordlessly watched her stand, stretch her sexy body, then quickly leave my study. I heard the soft murmur of her voice talking to Zoey and tried to stand, only to fall back onto my chair.
“Fuck,” I growled, leaning my body forward. My head was pounding, but my eyes saw the two painkillers on my desk sitting next to a glass of water. I swiveled my chair slightly to look towards the dawn of a new day that peeked through my window. Somehow, even hungover and feeling like shit, I felt lighter than I had in a very long time.
Anne
Moving around the kitchen, fixing breakfast for John and Zoey, I heard him enter the room and turned to face him.
“Hi,” I blurted out and shook my head, “Would you like coffee? Toast?”
“Yes, please,” he mumbled, slightly shy, and sat down at the far end of the kitchen table. I quietly but quickly worked to get him his coffee and toast. The moment I set his plate in front of him, his hand covered mine, and my body warmed at his touch.
“Stay. Please.” I looked at him, surprised and wondering if he meant more than right this moment.
“You have a new housekeeper, John.”
“Give me a chance.”
“I don’t think…” He made a frustrated sound and pulled me down to sit on his lap, my hands instinctively going to his shoulders.
“Don’t think, feel. Please. Anne, I’ll—”
“I’ll stay for the two weeks. I need to find a new job, John. I need to find a new place.”
“No. Not if you stay here. With me,” He retorted, his tone as stubborn as ever.
“I …”
“Stay in a guest room if you don’t want to sleep next to me, but please, Anne, don’t leave.” He leaned his forehead against mine, his dark eyes were slightly red with lack of sleep and a hangover, but they were honest and sincere. “I know I’m an asshole. I’m not very good at making you believe in me and what I want from you, but please, stay. Let me prove to you—”
“What do you want from me, John?”
“A chance, Kitten, just a chance. The last one. I won’t let you down.”
John
I watched Nikki and Zoey play in the sandbox I’d ordered and set up by the garden so I could watch them from the window of my office. Mike was sitting next to me. I couldn’t help but glance at him.
“What?” I bit out, and his expression of concern didn’t change.
“How do you feel this morning?” Mike asked, his stare not wavering, and I gave in. I owed him that much.
“Hungover.” He chuckled, shaking his head, so I kept talking. “I’m an asshole. I’m sorry for being a dick, man.” He looked away and nodded, his jaw slightly twitching. After a moment of quiet he drank from his glass of water, then looked at me.
“You remember last night?”
“Yeah,” I muttered, and he nodded and stood, then walked towards the window.
“She’s a good woman.”
“Yeah.” Better than good. Anne was magnificent.
“I have a feeling I don’t know all that’s been going on behind closed doors between the two of you, and this isn’t me asking for details, brother, but you have to know she’s in love with you.” I sat up st
raighter, her soft sleepy voice saying those three words ringing in my ears.
“Yeah,” I admitted, hitting my head against the back of the chair.
“Do you love her?” My heart and mind raced as they both yelled at me that I did. I fucking love Anne Carter.
“I care about her and Zoey a great deal.” I looked at Mike, his eyebrow raised. He knew I was lying. He knew I more than just cared about them.
“Question is, what are you going to do now?” My heart was pounding as he slapped me on the back before leaving my office.
I watched Anne with the girls in the sandbox in the silence of my office. As I watched Nikki try to help Zoey walk, but her legs were still too wobbly, I heard a soft knock at the door. I turned and smiled at Sabrina.
“Hey. You okay?” She asked, her voice gentle, and I took a deep breath.
“Yeah…” I nodded for her to come in, and she stood next to me, leaning her head against my shoulder as we both stared out at the girls.
“Zoey will be walking soon.”
“Yeah.”
“I remember how much I wanted Mark to walk. It felt like he took forever to start. Sean would tell me to relax and be patient.” I looked at her, wondering where she was going with talking about her dead husband, but her eyes stayed on the girls. Even though she was looking out the window, I knew by the look on her face that she was not actually seeing the girls but was instead looking at the past. With a smile and a slight shake of her head she said, “It used to drive me crazy every time he’d tell me to relax…Wound me up even more… Anyhow, the moment they start to walk, it all flashes in a blink of an eye. They grow up so fast.”
“Yeah,” I swallowed, my mind going to a time of my life I didn’t let myself think about. Alice had walked early.
“Yeah?” Sabrina asked, and I didn’t realize I’d said it out loud.
“But she was a good kid, she didn’t run. She always tried to grab hold of my hand, and even though she knew she could walk on her own…” I blinked the tears away, “She always held my hand.” My voice was rough, and Sabrina’s arm went around my back and held me tightly.
“Sean always wanted to take pictures.” She smiled, her eyes bright with unshed tears. “After he passed away…. I was glad he did that. Makes me sad we didn’t take more, for the kids you know? Especially for Chris.” At her admission and speaking about monumental losses, where not one was bigger than the other, something left me, fell off me like a weight.
“Yeah,” I sighed and looked towards Sabrina, who was smiling at me.
“You should take her out again.”
“I don’t think she wants to be anywhere near me.”
“Oh, I don’t know about that.”
“I...” I rubbed my face, “I messed up. I hurt her.”
“I guessed that,” her lips twitched, “Men mess up.” I smiled and shook my head.
“It’s not that easy.”
“I can see how you would think that with certain women.” Sabrina stopped talking, her face softening when she saw Anne walking back towards the sandbox where she was holding a tray with sippy cups for the kids and lemonade for Mike. Her gaze, though, was right towards my window. “She isn’t like most women, though.” Sabrina remarked, patting my back before turning and walking towards the door.
“Thank you,” I quickly said, gazing over my shoulder, and she smiled.
“I’m…I’m sorry we have those things in common. If you ever want to talk, you know where to find me,” she nodded and walked out of my office.
She isn’t like most women. Sabrina’s words couldn’t be truer.
Chapter Thirty-Eight
Anne
John hadn’t come down from his room or his office. Mike and Sabrina had left hours ago. Knowing everything he’d been through, I could see how he could let himself not feel, let himself believe he wasn’t a good man when in reality, he was wrong.
A bad man wouldn’t have looked twice at us on the side of the road.
Rationally knowing that and understanding it, I still couldn’t let myself go up to see him, to talk to him. Wiping down the counters, making sure his dinner was set out, I took a glass of lemonade to the table as I listened to Zoey’s sweet giggles. I headed to the family room. Panic struck my chest when I saw she wasn’t in her playpen.
“Zoey?”
“Mama….Mam…,” I heard her little voice behind me and I turned, relief hitting me like a wave as I saw her standing across the living room with John behind her, his large body bent slightly, so that if she fell, he’d catch her. Something about seeing that formed a knot in my throat. A huge one. As shitty as he’d been making me serve that dinner, I knew in the bottom of my heart that he’d do that. He’d catch either of us and keep us from falling. Hell, he’d done it the night of the storm.
“Look,” his eyes shone brightly as he bent his large body to her level, “Show Momma how you can walk, little Princess! Go to Mommy!” Zoey’s bright blue eyes met mine and she started to walk towards me, so I bent at the knees, putting my arms out for her.
“You can do it, baby girl!”
“Go...get Mommy!” John cheered and sure enough, Zoey reached me. I wrapped her up in my arms. The three of us laughed. I peeked over Zoey’s head to look at John who was still laughing. I could see in his eyes that he wanted to close the space between us, but was waiting for me to give him the green light; for me to give him permission when he wasn’t the kind of man to ask for it. I loved him. No matter what, I loved him. He let me in last night. So I did the only thing I could and nodded, and he rushed over, wrapping his strong arms around Zoey and me. I pressed my face into his chest and breathed in his cologne, and feeling Zoey’s laughter between us, everything felt right. It felt right.
Pulling my face away, I looked at him. His eyes shone with what I was feeling, and at that moment, I knew there was no way I could walk away from him. No way could I take us away from him. Not when I saw exactly what I felt shining brightly back at me.
Love.
“Okay. One last chance,” I whispered, but I knew he heard it when his lips crashed down on mine.
Chapter Thirty-Nine
John
Mrs. Bradley was our new housekeeper. She was a widow, had nothing but grown children, and was all settled into the guest house while Anne and Zoey had taken up residence in the guest room next to mine on my insistence. If it had been up to her, she would have moved into the tiny room next to the kitchen downstairs.
Things hadn’t been easy between us.
She was definitely giving me a chance, but she was hesitant. I saw the doubt that clouded her eyes and I was working on repairing the pain I’d caused. Days had turned into weeks. Three weeks, and I’d been coming home as early as I could every day I had to go into the office. There were days when I made Birdie work with me from my home office, or days when I delegated things to her I had no doubt she could handle efficiently, so that I could spend time with Anne and Zoey.
These last couple of weeks, I’d made it a point to take them out, surprising them, and I knew that my kitten liked it.
I liked how when we’d gone back to the Arboretum or the Los Angeles Zoo, she was the one seeking my hand to hold when we walked side by side as I pushed Zoey’s stroller. I really liked how she’d kissed me and we’d made out time and again on the couch after dinner while we were supposed to be watching television. She hadn't given me the green light to join her in her bed and she hadn’t come to mine, but just knowing that we were moving forward, that they were sleeping in the room next to mine, under my roof, safe and sound, helped me sleep at night.
It was Saturday. Anne had been busy working on something for Nick in the family room. I could hear her talking to Zoey as well as Zoey babble back to her in her baby talk. Anne had been working quite a bit for Nick and she seemed to really enjoy it. And from what Nick said, she was fantastic at what she did. It didn’t surprise me. I’d been in my office working on a couple of things, so that I didn’t have
to go in on Monday.
I was down in the kitchen, working on getting us a late lunch fixed, when she walked in. I heard her light footsteps against the tiled floor as she entered the kitchen, and I smiled as I finished chopping and dicing the carrots. I looked over at her sexy body leaning against the countertop next to me, a very amused look on her face.
“Hey,” I told her, smiling, and I noticed her eyes watching my lips in a way they hadn’t since I’d been a jerk.
“You’re cooking?” She asked, her lips twitching.
“I’m making us a late lunch.”
“Should you be allowed in here to do that?”
“What?” I scoffed, knowing where this was going, “I know what I’m doing.” She pressed her luscious lips together.
“I was in here after you tried to make us pancakes.” Her voice was playful and her hazel eyes shone brightly. I shook my head and laughed.
“Yeah. Not my best moment, but I know what I am making here.”
“Pancakes are one of the easiest things you can make. I read an article where pancakes were on a list for the top ten things anyone should know how to make in their twenties.”
“And?” I asked, enjoying her playfulness, even if it was at my expense.
“And?” Her lips curled up into a smile, “You, Mister, are way past your twenties.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah.” I closed the space between us and lifted her onto the counter, moving my body between her legs. Her hands wrapped around my neck naturally, and there was a sparkle in her eyes.
“You like how old I am,” I told her, trying to ignore the way my body buzzed when I was this close to her, aching for me to be closer.
“I like you just the way you are.” Her voice was slightly husky, and I watched her lips part. “John.”
“I like you the way you are, too… a lot.” I leaned in and kissed her lips softly and was surprised when she pulled me in closer into her scent, her warmth, and I lost control. Our tongues battled each other passionately, until she moaned and I pulled slightly away. With our foreheads touching, I watched her as she was breathing through her nose, her eyes still closed.
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