by Lia Lee
“I know,” he answered, his voice low, but brimming with sincerity. “I know how much it means to you to earn your bachelor’s degree and your doctorate, not to mention your upcoming internship. I understand, Jessica, and I’m willing to wait for you. For as long as it takes.”
She lifted her chin and spoke as coolly as she could manage.
“I don’t think you understand, Brent. This thing between us – it’s not forever. I’m just a college student, and you’re – you’re a Sanderson. You have a daughter to think about. And besides, my father is your close friend. The two of us can never have… whatever it is you’re thinking. I’m too young, and it’s just too complicated.”
She reached up to take off the pendant, but his big hands captured hers, stilling them.
“Where we go from here,” he said, looking down into her eyes, “is up to you. If you don’t want…” Me, she could almost hear him say. “… a long-term relationship, that’s your decision. But keep the pendant. Please. As a token of my feelings, and a reminder of this summer. Okay?”
She swallowed and blinked, fighting back the tears.
“Okay,” she agreed.
He bent to kiss her, but she looked guiltily toward the kitchen. “Your staff—”
“All left after the dessert was served, just as they were told to do. We have complete privacy, Jessica. For what I have in mind, we’re going to need it.”
The corners of his eyes crinkled, and she couldn’t help but smile back at him.
“What exactly did you have in mind?”
“You know what I am thinking,” Brent said, licking his lips before her.
Standing up, he took her hand and led her to his bedroom, to his special corner of the penthouse. The massive king-size bed was decked out with sumptuous black silk sheets. He’d obviously been planning everything for a while, as he had candles set up on his nightstand, casting the walls of the room in the brilliant orange of a flickering flame. There were rose petals scattered at the foot of the bed, and Jessica was overwhelmed with the whole scene. She’d slipped the gorgeous gold and diamond dolphin around her neck, but it felt heavy.
A bit like an albatross.
She cared so much about Brent. If they were any other two people in different circumstances, she’d definitely admit she’d fallen in love with him. But they weren’t different. She couldn’t let herself fall, no matter how her heart pounded in his presence. She was still the daughter of his close friend and business partner, and he still had a father who despised her and a little girl who might be hurt by everything coming to light.
It was nothing more than a summer fling.
But tonight said that Brent felt it was anything but.
She sighed and smiled. School was starting back soon, and her blissful summer would end, the love and affection between them would end forever. Jessica might not have Brent for much longer, but she could have tonight.
Brent stood along the far wall of his bedroom – a room that could easily fit her whole damn apartment in it – and unbuttoned his shirt slowly. She bit her lip and felt her belly flush with heat at the sight. Brent was quite the specimen to behold; exercise was his way to combat stress, and he was quite the gym rat before work she’d found. He was definitely one of those annoying morning people. But it had done his body good. As the blue button-up slid from his shoulders, Jessica couldn’t help but intake a sharp breath at the vision before her. Moonlight played over the planes of his body and the ridges of his abs, a tight six-pack that would make any woman desperate for him and most men jealous.
He was gorgeous, and Brent was all hers.
She followed suit, slipping out from her sundress. Knowing they were having an intimate date that night when she’d dressed for dinner, Jessica hadn’t worn underwear. It was a bit of her daring side coming out, the side that had been growing since Brent had come into her life. She was also braless because the dress would never accommodate such a look. She knew that when she’d picked it, knew it would drive Brent wild.
He rumbled low in his throat and smiled. “You’re beautiful, sweetheart, just like I’ve always said.”
She blushed. “You’re not so bad yourself.”
Brent unhooked his belt and then undid his pants. Tonight, he’d matched her for spirit and daring. He’d promised her before that he sometimes went commando, and tonight was no exception. Already strong and thick, his impressive erection was springing free for her. His shaft stood at attention, a mast among a thatch of dark gold curls. Her mouth watered just seeing it.
“But you’re better,” he replied. “I want you.”
She winked, playing into everything. “Of course you do.”
“I had planned this out to be romantic. I always felt bad the first time wasn’t in a setup like this.”
She eyed the dresser and the myriad of honest to God candelabras laid out over it. “I know, and it’s gorgeous.”
“But,” he said, stepping forward and running a finger down her cheek, “seeing you there, I can’t help but want to ravish you right now.”
Jessica laughed, her heart feeling lighter than it had since the gift. “I want to do anything you do. I’ve never wanted anything else. Besides, I’m going to admit that seeing you like this, I can hardly wait.”
“Good. Because I have a few ideas.”
“Show me.” Jessica flipped her long, dark hair behind her back. “Show me anything.”
Brent surged forward and surprised her by picking her up in his arms. She wrapped her legs around him eagerly, already feeling his rod poking up against the round globe of her ass. Her core grew wet with need, and the heat building through her belly flared up her limbs, down to her fingers and toes.
He leaned close, and that amazing scent of cloves and cinnamon tickled her nose. The stubble of his five o’clock shadow scraped enticingly at her chin as he leaned up to whisper in her ear. His voice was like thick honey, something she could get caught and lost in forever. “I want to fuck you up against this wall. Is that something you’d like to try with me, babe?”
Jessica felt so risqué doing this, even though later she knew they’d make quiet love among the layers of soft sheets on the bed. With Brent, everything at least in the bedroom was possible, and she loved learning under his tutelage. Nodding, she looked up at him, her eyes meeting his Arctic blue ones.
“I’ll do anything you want.”
“Don’t say what you don’t mean,” he offered.
“I’ll try up against a wall with you.” Her fingers came to rest on the dolphin of her own accord. She could try anything sexual with him, but somehow she couldn’t risk her heart. It was probably selfish of her, but her body for right now was all she could give. “I trust you.”
His smile tightened for just a moment, then felt genuine again. “Good, babe, because I’m going to rock your world.”
He hefted her up and slid his length into her core, his penis sliding inch by heated inch into her channel. It was so large that sometimes she marveled at being able to accommodate him. His girth stretched her out, made her feel full in ways she’d never imagined before, and it always felt like a mix of security and coming home to have him buried deep inside of her. He rocked his hips, and she rolled with the motion, using the strength of her legs to lift herself up and down on his massive length.
Brent moved toward the wall, and she felt the light coolness of the wood against her back. Brent thrust again, this time claiming her with his mouth as he did so. His tongue tangled with hers and the taste of chocolate and Scotch was on her taste buds, teasing her. Brent’s pace increased, and her clit started to pulse with need and the hint of pleasure tickling her nerves.
She broke away from his kisses to throw her head back and moan. “More, I need so much more.”
“On it, sweetheart,” he said, his voice that same low rumble that drove her mad.
His pace quickened, and his mouth moved to the tip of her left breast. His tongue flicked and played over the hardened peak of
her nipples and, by then, her clit was alight with pleasure, with the power of an orgasm beginning to build. Brent angled his hips just so, pumping deeper into her, and his change hit that spot deep within her body, the one that sent her nerves screaming with delight.
It was then Brent’s pace increased, his hips pistoning against her as her heels dug into this ass to keep herself upright. Her breath came in ragged gasps, the room was filled with the sound of her breathing and his, the only noise accompanying them. Her perfume mingled with his cinnamon scent and their own musks – a mix of sex around them – were all roiling through her nose. The pressure of the wall against her back somehow made the movements of his cock deep inside her that much more intense.
That much better.
She closed her eyes and gave into sensation, gave into the need driving her.
Jessica came in a flash, as if she’d detonated around him and then slowly pieced herself back together even as he climaxed and shot his seed deep inside of her.
Thank God for birth control.
She was mostly incoherent as the final bits of orgasm-induced haze lifted from her. Setting her forehead against his shoulder, she let him prop her up on his bed. But, to her surprise, Brent didn’t immediately join her on the other side. Instead, he leaned low and traced his finger over the gold dolphin at the hollow her throat.
“I know there’s so much to discuss, so much to do to make you see it, sweetheart. But you’re mine. You belong to me, and we fit together. We just can’t let this go.”
She smiled and clasped his hand in hers. Offering him a tight smile, she gave him the only answer she could: “We’ll see, love. We’ll see.”
Chapter Twelve
Jessica
“You know,” Ashley chirped, “the cost of school books sucks.”
Dana laughed as they filled up their arms with all the various items listed on their respective class lists at the UC San Diego Bookstore. Jessica had been feeling pretty crappy all week, just dizzy and nauseated a lot. It had caused her to pass on going a few times already, and she needed to get the books before all the other kids bought them out. Then again, everyone else at UCSD must have had that same thought because it felt like every student on campus was cramped into the hot, sweatbox that was the bookstore today.
It was totally doing wonders for her illness.
Not.
Dana continued to roll her eyes as Ashley moaned about her books. “I have to get art supplies too. You want to be bled dry, keep buying canvas and oils.”
Jessica tried to smile. “I would also like to point out that thick-ass textbooks cost like two hundred bucks or more a piece brand new.”
“Not as bad as my bills, still,” Dana chimed in. “And I’m a starving artiste.”
“I’m a starving actress,” Ashley said, which seemed a bit literal these days. She was down to a size 00 after the latest round of casting director crap, and Jessica was worried about her. Of course, every time she tried to hint that Ashley should eat more or maybe rest from auditions for a while over in L.A., Ash just complained more. “I don’t even pay much to eat, and I don’t have enough in my budget left over for all of this!”
“And I do well nannying, but this is just…” Jessica sighed as they got into the never-ending line. She couldn’t even see the cashier from here. They weren’t going anywhere for hours. “It’s a conspiracy. An overpriced one to bleed our student loans.”
“Don’t you know it,” Dana replied.
“Yes,” Ashley said, blowing her auburn bangs out of her face. “I’ll be paying these books off at the retirement home.”
“Exactly and…” Jessica stopped then. She was still plenty angry and frustrated, but her stomach was lurching, and she felt bile trying to work its way back up her throat. “Wait, I need to get to the bathroom.”
Her stomach twisted in knots even further, and she rushed for the bathroom down the hall. Ashley ran after her as Dana desperately seemed to fumble with the collection of books and art supplies. Jessica caught a glimpse of the shitshow she’d left behind when she glanced over her shoulder, but she didn’t have the time to worry about it.
She was Mount Vesuvius about to blow.
The swinging door jostled back and forth on its hinges as she rushed for the nearest stall. She barely got enough time to slam the stall door behind her and get some privacy before she threw up. It lasted for a while, and she lingered with the drive heaves before she was done. Spent, she rested her head in her hands and felt tears flow down her cheeks.
“What’s wrong with me?”
“Hey?” Ashley asked as she entered the bathroom. “Are you okay?”
Jessica stood up and forced herself back out into the world and made sure she was cleaning up at the sink. “I think it’s just the flu going around, you know?”
“Mhmmm.”
She frowned and glared at her friend. “What?”
“Well, you have been eating more,” Ashley said.
Jessica wanted to counter that Ashley had been eating a lot less, but she bit her tongue over such a petty comment. “I guess.”
“How long have you been nauseated. It’s seemed like a while now.”
Jessica tried not to overthink it, but there was a definite direction, and aim, to Ashley’s questions. “Maybe two weeks. It’s not such a big deal, is it?” Her hands traced over the filigree of the dolphin necklace she wore all the time, except when she visited her dad’s place. “So I caught something weird, so what?”
“I didn’t think anything was going around, to be honest,” Ashley said.
“What are you saying?”
“You could be pregnant.”
Jessica’s whole body stiffened. No way could that be true. Absolutely none. Zero. She’d been careful. She’d been taking her pill religiously for months. It didn’t make sense. “I can’t be.”
“Well, I’m just saying. Let’s get you home and see, okay?” Ashley hugged her. “I’m really worried about you.”
Me too.
***
The little plus sign was on the stick. The little plus sign had been on the last three sticks, so why Jessica thought a fourth one would be any different, she wasn’t sure. Her shoulders hunched over, she trudged back to the living room where both Dana and Ashley sat wide-eyed. Dana was on the far end of the couch, glancing back to the used tests on the coffee table like they were cobras ready to bite her. Ashley’s face was sympathetic, and it was appreciated to have two good friends like this. Her mom wasn’t in the picture very regularly, and there was no way she could talk to her dad about this.
Or Brent.
Oh God, what was she gonna do?
The worry must have been playing across her features because Ashley surged to her and wrapped her up in another warm hug. Together they stumbled to the couch, too, and Jessica slumped heavily down on it. Her heart raced. Her breath was impossible to catch. None of this could be happening.
“I don’t understand. I was on birth control. This shouldn’t even be a problem!”
“Were you on any other medications?” Dana asked. “My cousin has to take meds for her seizures, so that nullifies the effect of her birth control.”
Jessica’s throat went dry. “I… Just some meds to help me get more sleep over the summer since I was so stressed about my professors giving me a hard time about no internship. Some St. John’s wart, too.”
Ashley yanked out her phone and Googled a few things on it. “Oh man, Google says they can definitely affect b.c.”
Jessica felt she might vomit again and it had very little to do with the morning sickness she was apparently experiencing. “No.”
Dana rubbed her shoulder. “We will figure this out. I called a friend while you were in their who works at a free clinic that also has an OB on staff. We go there, and it’s not free, but we can cover it together. We know you can’t ask your dad.”
Jessica’s lip wobbled. “My dad is gonna kill me.”
“First, we see this doc Dan
a found, then we figure the rest out,” Ashley said, hopping onto her feet. “Whatever you decide and whatever you do from here, your little one has two kickass aunts who are going to help you and won’t abandon you.”
“Nope, girlie, you’ll have to beat me off with a stick,” Dana added, nodding at her. “Now, I’ll drive.”
“You’re the only one with a car,” Ashley pointed out.
“True, but I don’t think if I declined… Well… this isn’t really an Uber moment,” Dana replied.
Jessica sighed and let her friends pick her up and lead her out to the car. The drive was a blur and the appointment’s beginnings even more of a whirlwind. Ashley and Dana took care of the forms and making small talk with Dana’s friend the tech. All of it was too overwhelming. Jessica barely managed to step on and off the scale and then sit still long enough for her blood pressure to be taken. She felt like she had to have a neon sign over her, some scarlet letter that marked her obviously for everything she’d done.
Finally, the doctor entered. She seemed nice enough with a wide smile and kind eyes shining out from her dark face. She nodded to Jessica on the table and then surprised her by taking her hand. The doc patted it softly. “I know this might be hard, but let’s see what’s going on for right now. It’s all going to be okay. I know you can figure this out.”
“You don’t know me.”
“No, but I see women make hard choices all the time, and they don’t have two friends come with them all the time. Besides, Dana volunteered here a few summers ago, so I know you have some resources. Something. You have good friends to support you and a medical team who cares. So, let’s breathe together, and I’ll get the ultrasound started.”
Tears sprang to Jessica’s eyes, both because she was glad the doctor was so kind and because this felt wrong, like it was an insult to Brent and all they’d shared. He should be here.
If he wanted to actually be here.
God, she’d have to come to that decision later. The doctor and tech… everyone had been so delicate with her even as the tech prepped the gel over her stomach. All assembled weren’t saying what her options were, but Jessica knew there weren’t any. Not at all. The second she’d realized she was pregnant, she’d only thought about keeping the baby. After coming from a shattered home, she couldn’t imagine not reaching out and doing anything she could to keep an extra member from joining it. It just wasn’t her.