Cuts like a knife

by Dana Monahan

  When Dr. Braddock opened the front door to let the frog go, Brody, Brad and Trent all stood perfectly still until the door closed behind him. With a whooshing sound, Trent exhaled the breath he was holding. “Dude, that was close. The old man was standing right next to me, but I blended into the night. I’m awesome. In like Trent.” Stooping to pick up the frog, he held him out. “He’s not moving.”

  “Don’t sweat it,” Brody chuckled. “He probably just fainted when Billie started to scream. It was like music to my ears.”

  “It was righteous.” Brad agreed, grinning. “But I’ve got to get home. I’ll catch you guys tomorrow.”

  Trent followed Brad and Brody to the street corner where they parted ways after patting themselves on the back for a job well done.

  ---------------

  Morning came quickly and Billie had put the incident behind her. At the bus stop, she’d expected Trent and Brad to give her a hard time, but they hadn’t given any indication that they knew about her adventure with Mr. Frog. It was on the bus, when she’d glanced back to see Trent watching her, that she knew she’d been duped. He was about four rows back, arms crossed over his chest, just waiting for her to notice him, she realized by his smug grin.

  “Good Morning, Billie,” he called out. “Did you have any wet dreams last night?”

  After that, the rest of the bus ride consisted of her being laughed at. A couple of kids called out, "Ribut, ribut," when she walked by their seats, and even Kelly and Sierra were joining in on the jokes. Billie was fed up with being teased by the time she reached first period. Her bad mood was broken by the two startled screams of Sierra and Kelly. Somehow on the bus, Brad and Trent had managed to put the bull frogs in their backpacks. The large one had just crawled out of Sierra's.

  "A friend of yours, I assume." Sierra had calmed down, giggled, and looked to Billie, who nodded. Kelly also smiled, but it soon dissolved when she pulled out her wet homework, causing Brad and Trent to crack up again. Before Billie could stop herself, she was laughing with them.

  "Bad karma," said Brad, draping an arm over Billie’s shoulder.

  "You mean, pay back's a bitch, don't you?"

  “It’s just a prank between friends. Don’t get your panties in a wad.” Brad felt perfectly at home with his arm around Billie. She smiled up at him and he wondered what it would be like to kiss her. Someday he hoped there would be more than friendship between them.

  CHAPTER 3

  A lone raindrop tapped on Billie's window, leaving a dewy trail as it slid down the pane of glass to disappear in the grass below. Setting her book down, she slid from her bed and pulled the pane all the way up, inhaling the scent of rain in the night air. Leaning forward, she scanned the area, seeing Brody’s driveway to the right, a long road encased with a line of trees now void of the purple and white blossoms that bring such color in spring. She admired the lush green carpet that blanketed over eighty acres of prime land and wondered what it would be like to go running through it on this rainy night.

  Across the way, the faint light on Sierra's porch barely outlined the mobile home that her mom rented from Billie’s father, his only attempt at property investment. She heard the hoot of an owl and knew he dwelled in the tree outside Sierra’s window. Next door, but a quarter mile away, she could make out the white picket fence surrounding Kelly’s front yard, bringing to mind the bright array of flowers in front of the deck, now bathed in darkness. A small incline on the street blocked Trent and Brad’s houses from view.

  Two headlights descended from the right, and Billie recognized the shape of Brody's car. Brad had called her earlier and mentioned that they were going night fishing. Brody honked as he passed her house, a greeting of sorts. For some reason, watching him drive away made her feel lonely. Sometimes these melancholy moods would hit and she would imagine how life would be changed if only her mom had lived; or even more so, when she was sitting alone in a quiet house.

  The memory of her mother faded more and more every year, so Billie helped keep it alive by placing a large photo of her mother and dad on her dresser. It was a close-up of the two of them smiling broadly as they looked tenderly into her mother's arms, where she cradled Billie at the age of two. When was the last time she saw her dad smile at her, she mused? Not one of those forced smiles that lack warmth or sincerity, but one from the heart. Like the one in the picture.

  Billie traced a finger over her mother’s high cheek bones, the small, slightly uplifted nose, and the wide thin lips curved up slightly in a grin. A face so like her own. Squeezing her eyes tight, she tried to bring up a happy memory, but she only remembered the night in the hospital when her father explained to her that Mommy was dead. A fatal car accident had taken her life. And with it, her father’s love, thought Billie sadly.

  Ever since he lost his wife, her father spent his days at the hospital, and nights, if there were no emergencies, would be spent reading the newspaper in front of the television. As Chief of Staff, she could understand that his responsibilities would keep him busy, but he was a virtual stranger to her. He left her $50.00 on the kitchen counter the first of every month for spending money. Every three months, he would put in an extra $50.00 for some clothes. His secretary, Lily, would come by every other Wednesday to take Billie grocery shopping. At least she had learned to be self-sufficient. And that was all the self-pity she would indulge in for now, she thought on a happier note.

  Billie was reaching for the phone when it rang. "Hello?"

  "Hey. It's me," Sierra said. "What're you doing? You sound kind of down."

  "Just bored, I guess."

  "Well, my mom took off for work. Why don't you come hang with me? She brought me some Chinese take-out before she left. There's plenty for two."

  "That sounds cool. Let me throw on some jeans, and I'll walk over."

  Billie grabbed some old faded jeans out of her closet and topped them with one of her many extra-large sweat shirts. Outside, thick grass cushioned her bare feet and a cool breeze ruffled her hair. The short walk over to Sierra's seemed to lighten her mood; thoughts of her mother and father were pushed to the back of her mind.

  It wasn't necessary to knock, so Billie walked right in and headed for Sierra's room, where she found her sitting cross-legged on her bed, slurping up noodles. Before Billie had a chance to sit, Sierra saw her and started to complain.

  "I thought my mom would never leave. If it’s not enough that she's just bitching about my clothes being too tight or my grades being so low, now I'm a slob, too."

  Billie surveyed the room. Clothes were thrown carelessly on the floor along with an empty bag of chips. A few soda cans, candy wrappers and old magazines littered the top of her dresser. "Go figure." A brow lifted in sarcasm.

  "Shut up. The food’s in the kitchen." Sierra just raised her voice when Billie left the room. "It's my room, isn't it? She even brought up the old sob story about how hard it is to be a single parent. Give me a break."

  With a full plate, Billie came back in the room and sat on the bed. From experience on this particular subject, she knew Sierra didn't expect her to reply, so she ate in silence. For some reason, Sierra was under the impression that the world owed her. She could do whatever she pleased because she could always find someone to blame for her actions. Her mother was the main target of these tantrums. How dare she tell Sierra what to do and try to help! Billie glanced up, putting her private thoughts aside, to show some pretense of interest.

  "She just wanted to remind me that my dad never wanted me. Well, look at me now," Sierra jutted out her chin. "That's something that will never happen again. No guy would ever turn me away, and no guy ever will. She was married to the man. How lame can you get? If it had been me, he wouldn’t have left his wife."

  With a quick, objective glance, Billie took in the appearance of her friend. A short pink robe showed off her long brown legs with a gold chain wrapped daintily around one of her slim ankles. Even with her long black hair thrown carelessly in a clip on top
of her head and her full lips pursed tightly together, she could pass for a model. It was probably nice to be so confident, but her looks seemed to be the only thing she focused on anymore.

  "Your dad was an asshole. It was his loss. Your Mom’s cool. She works her butt off for you. Who do you think pays for those tight clothes of yours?" Billie shrugged and sucked in a long noodle. Why Sierra suddenly kept harping on the past lately was something she couldn't understand. Sierra didn't even know who her father was. Billie knew what it was like to have a father who wasn't interested, but she had learned to live with it. Sierra just seemed to get more and bitterer.

  A Brady Bunch rerun filled the T.V. screen and Billie lay on her stomach across the bed placing her chin in her hands. Sierra hadn’t said anything for a few moments, so with any luck the bitch session was at an end.

  Sierra pointed her fork at the television. "That would be cool. You know, all of us being one big family. Can you imagine the six of us living together? Of course, we wouldn't be dorks like those guys, except maybe for Kelly."

  "What do you mean by that? Kelly's not a dork." With a slight roll of the hips, Billie was looking at Sierra, ready to defend their friend.

  "Come on. Doesn't all that sweetness get on your nerves; Kelly with her perfect little family. Always baby-sitting her perfect little brother and sister for Mommy and Daddy.” Sierra smiled and fluttered her lashes. “Hi, I’m Kelly. Aren’t I special?”

  "What about you?” Billie stuck her nose in the air. “Hi, I’m Sierra. Don’t you wish you looked like me? Well, let me tell you, she's been my friend since I was a kid, and no, she doesn't bother me. I used to think she was your friend, too. You know, we all stick together. What the hell is your problem?"

  A little stab of anger settled in Sierra’s stomach at Billie’s display of loyalty for Kelly, but she hid it behind a smile laced with remorse. "I guess I'm just jealous of her family life. Come on, don't you remember when we'd pretend to have a happy little family like hers?"

  "Yeah, but I don't hate Kel for having it," Billie responded hotly and stood up to pace, immediately regretting her harsh tone.

  "That figures. Stick up for her. You always did choose her over me. Sweet little Kelly gets all the attention. Well, not from me anymore. Especially not when we get to high school," She scooted off the bed and planted herself in front of Billie. "I plan on cutting loose and being cool. Besides, I'll be dating too much to really hang out with you anyway. You're too goody-goody for me."

  "So, what you're saying is, we're too good for you to hang with anymore," Billie threw over her shoulder as she walked to the kitchen to put up her plate.

  "Very funny," Sierra followed on her heels. Billie and Kelly were just jealous of her, she thought. They didn’t want her around anymore because she’d get all the guys. "But you'll see. You and Kelly will marry some small-time boys who can't keep a job, but you'll be happy because you have love. Then they will leave you with two kids and no money for support. Not me. I'm going to live it up in school, marry a rich man, and if he ever leaves me, I'll still have his money to keep me happy. If we're still friends, maybe I'll let you borrow some money in your time of need.” Billie yawned, and Sierra felt her long nails digging painfully into her palms.

  "Sounds like a lonely life to me. I already feel sorry for you.” When Sierra’s mouth dropped open in a dramatic display of shock, Billie just shook her head. “Well, it's been real, but I'm outta here." With a sweeping gesture, she opened the front door and strolled off without a backwards glance.

  "You feel sorry for me? That's a laugh. You're just jealous because you know the guys will all be looking at me. I feel sorry for you! You’re just a boobless wonder with big hips," Sierra yelled at Billie’s back. At her lack of response, Sierra wanted to scream or throw something at her. The front door was the closest thing, so she slammed it then kicked it for good measure. “Nobody walks away from me. Nobody!”

  So much for company, Billie thought to herself. What brought all that on, anyway? When they were younger it never mattered who looked the best or who liked who most. Did growing up mean growing apart? Brody was older and he hadn't changed. Maybe he wasn't around as much, hanging out more with his friends from school and dating, but he was still as irritating as ever. The future suddenly seemed a little overwhelming, or she was just scared of change. Too bad they couldn’t stay young forever.

  When Billie got home, she was greeted by silence. After a quick stop in the kitchen to chug some milk out of the carton, she headed to her room and dropped on the bed. It was time to call Kel.

  For an hour they babbled on about school and gossiped. When Billie hung up, she felt much better. Kel wouldn't change Billie realized and she felt her spirits lift. Everything was going to be all right.

  -----------------

  Kelly tucked in her little brother, Sam, after reading him a short story. His mouth opened wide for a yawn, and then he reached out skinny arms for a hug goodnight. Kelly reached down and tickled his ribs setting him off into a fit of giggles. With his baseball mitt still on his hand, he rolled over and fell instantly to sleep. After shutting off his light, she crossed the hall to her room that she shared with her sister, Sarah.

  The room was actually clean. Sarah never played with a few toys at a time. She had to have everything out and scattered around her, but Kelly could never get her to clean up. Normally, the room was so chaotic by bedtime; it was hard to tell whose side was whose. Pretending shock came easy. "Wow!"

  "Did you see? I cleaned it without you telling me." Sarah smiled proudly from the bed. "I'm going be seven next month. That's too old to be tucked in."

  "You're such a big girl now. I guess I'll just shut off the light."

  "Wait! I don't want you to cry." She held out her arms. "You can hug me."

  A child's love is priceless, Kelly thought, looking into Sarah's happy face. They all resembled their father with his thick brown hair and round face. There was a time when Kelly didn’t think she would ever have siblings. Her parents tried, without luck, to have more children for years. Then six years later, along came Sarah and Sam. God had blessed them with twins, her mom would often say.

  After tucking in her sister, Kelly headed down the hall to clean the messy kitchen. Her parents enjoyed going out alone together once in a week, and she liked to have the house nice and clean for them when they returned.

  When the phone started ringing, Kelly rushed to answer it so as not to wake up the kids.

  "Hello?" she said brightly, but the other end held only silence. This was the fourth prank tonight. With a heavy sigh, Kelly hung up and hoped that would be the last call.

  Across the way, Sierra heard Kelly answer and slammed down the phone, knocking a picture off her night stand. Reaching down under her bed, she found the picture and rolled over on her back to check it out. It was a picture of her with Kelly and Billie, standing arm in arm, taken about six years ago. The three of them had on matching shirts, dirty from play, and pig-tails. Sierra remembered how they used to tell everyone they were sisters. A slight smile tugged at the corners of her mouth before she carelessly tossed the picture face down onto her night stand. Then her phone rang. "This is Sierra?"

  "It's me." Billie said, casually.

  "Your phone's been busy. I tried to call forever. Did you tell Kelly what I said?"

  "No."

  "I'm sorry that I was a total bitch. My mom pissed me off and I took it out on you."

  "It's cool. Remember, friends forever. Besides, you're always a bitch."

  Sierra laughed and hung up her phone. As an afterthought, she turned the picture face up.

  -------------

  The rest of the school year seemed to fly by for Billie. A hot summer sun left the ground thirsty for rain. For the last two months, winter clothes had been replaced by summer attire.

  It was finally the end of the last day of school and Billie hopped off the bus with Kelly and Sierra. Kelly had called the night before and talked her into w
earing a dress. Its bright turquoise color enhanced her blue-green eyes and beginning summer tan, but who cared. She couldn't wait to get out of it.

  Unlike Sierra, who looked totally comfortable? Her dress was too short and too tight, and the low neckline gave a slight hint of her blossoming bosom. It was a slight reminder to Billie that she was still flat as a board. And how about Kelly, she thought? Kelly looked virginal next to Sierra in her white sundress buttoned modestly all the way to the top button. The tomboy, the harlot and the virgin was the description that came to mind, bringing a secret smile to Billie’s lips.

  "Where did Brad and Trent go? I never saw them after last period." Kelly was glancing in their yards expecting them to pop out any minute.

  "Who knows," Billie pushed her sun-lightened hair out of her face and then shrugged irritably when it tumbled down around her eyes again. "Let's get out of these dresses and head up to the rock. They'll show up."

  "I can't believe it. Next year we'll be in high school." Sierra spun around dreamily. "I can't wait."

  "I can. I'm kind of nervous," Kelly admitted.

  "Don't worry, Kel. I'm nervous too," Billie said. "Just think, Brody is already in high school and he is doing okay. Well, except for being totally obnoxious, but he was always like that." Reaching out, Billie gave Kelly's hand a reassuring squeeze then lifted her face to enjoy the shade of the large apple tree they were passing under. Water splashed over her face, causing her to gasp in surprise. With water dripping from her chin, she opened her eyes and found herself looking up at Brody. She was just about to call him a few choice names when he dropped another water balloon. "Run!" she yelled over her shoulder.