by Penn Cassidy
“Thanks for letting me clean up. I know this is weird.” It was beyond weird, actually.
She studied me with narrowed eyes that were knowing and shrewd but not unkind. Her face was made up and flashy, with black lips, winged eyeliner that nearly touched her temples, and little jewels stuck to her cheeks in the place of her dimples.
“What’s your name, girl?” she asked. Her nails clinked against her mug.
“Moria—Mori, you can call me Mori.”
Damnit, what was wrong with me? How had I become such a bumbling idiot all of a sudden?
It looked like Elly was restraining a grin. “Bael should be here within the hour.” She glanced at an old clock on the wall. It wasn’t even ticking, which was odd. “Although, trusting St. Claire to keep to a schedule would require a miracle in itself, so good luck waiting.”
Where the hell had he even run off to anyway? He’d just dumped me here and disappeared.
“Elly, I’m not trying to be rude, but what the hell is this place, really? This isn't exactly how I imagined the crossroads at all.”
“So he’s told you about the crossroads then,” she said, raising a surprised brow.
“I made them tell me something at least. But getting them to speak without ulterior motives and riddles is apparently impossible.”
“Them?”
“Bael and Theodore.”
Something like surprise shone in her eyes, but it was gone in a flash. She set her mug down before leaning back in her chair.
“Well, then I’d say you’re in good hands.”
“That’s debatable,” I grumbled, then cringed. “Sorry, I'm not trying to be this bitchy. I don't even know you.”
She rolled her eyes, waving me away. “Don’t worry about offending me, darling. I’ve got thicker skin than most, something I’d encourage you to develop as fast as you can. But I’d like to give you some advice, if you don’t mind.” She didn’t wait for me to give her the go-ahead. “I know you’re scared and confused. Anyone in their right mind would be. But whatever you do, do not let the carnival see it.”
“What do you mean?” She spoke of the carnival as it were alive, which was insane. “Should I be afraid for my life, Elly?”
A smile twitched her lips in earnest this time, and something like pity filled her pink eyes.
“You should fear a lot of things here. Never let yourself forget that. Even I can smell the terror all over you, and it’s enticing. This place doesn’t play by the rules you’re used to. It doesn’t care about your needs or your expectations. Show it that you don't fear it, and you might—”
A knock on the door cut her off mid warning. For a moment, silence hung in the air between us. I couldn’t seem to pull my eyes from hers, as if she were willing me with every cell in her body to listen.
I’d listen. Or I'd die trying at least.
Elly went to the door and peeked her head out. There was a soft murmuring before she stepped back inside. “I think it’s for you.”
Joining her at the door, I expected to see Bael standing there, probably with a smirk on his too handsome face, but to my surprise, it was just Lafayette.
He sat on the mossy ground at the base of Elly’s wagon, tail curling around his body and blinking up at me with those shining silver eyes.
“I wouldn’t keep the gentleman waiting if I were you,” Elly said.
Then over my shoulder, a small object hurled through the air and landed at the cat’s feet. It was a Jelly Bean. Lafayette snatched it up and swallowed it whole.
I cast Elly a dubious look, but she simply shrugged like this was a normal occurrence.
I supposed I should follow the little devil. After all, he was the first one to approach me. I still couldn’t say I trusted him though. Leading me into that fun house was messed up for many reasons, and I had a feeling he knew it.
I opened my mouth to tell Elly thank you again for letting me stay in her wagon, but she beat me to it.
“You’re welcome here any time, Mori.” She patted me on the shoulder, and to my surprise, the touch of her palm was warm.
For some reason, I thought she’d be cold, being dead and all.
She grinned. “And keep the dress. It looks better on you anyway.”
I was on the third stair down when I turned back to the strange woman. My stomach was a sudden jumble of butterflies. She stood there patiently in her doorway.
“Elly…”
My voice was scratchy, with nerves, probably. She’d been incredibly helpful to me, but still, we were strangers and I didn’t want to test her patience.
“Spit it out, darling. I’m already late as it is.”
Her words were quick and snappy, but her face remained open and kind. It was almost comical, the way she casually leaned against the doorframe, clad in her full body striped ensemble and face paint as if it were the most normal thing in the world.
“That man—Theodore,” I said, nearly choking on his name. Elly’s eyes flashed with unease for a brief moment. It made my throat tighten up. “Is he dangerous?”
I already knew the answer. His face flashed in my mind. Those black, marble-like eyes. That skeleton façade that peeked out when the light shifted just right.
“Be careful around that one,” Elly said gravely.
Her pink eyes flicked from side to side nervously. But there was no one around but the two of us and the edge of the trees.
“We don’t see him very often, but if he’s taken an interest in you, it can’t mean anything good. Please watch yourself, Mori. This place will get you drunk on its essence, and if you’re not careful, it’ll eat you up.”
There was real concern in her eyes. It was like she knew something important but was choosing not to let me in on the secret. Again, she spoke of this place as if it were a living thing. As if it could see and hear me, or even feel me through my fear alone.
The thought was mind-numbingly terrifying.
Lafayette led me through the carnival. This time, instead of cobwebs, broken down booths, and the skeletons of old rides, there were lights, people, music, and the smells of sweets everywhere.
I made sure to skirt around the grey faces as much as I could, even though Lafayette was content to cut straight through the long lines, sometimes even between their feet. The cat was out to kill me, I just knew it.
I immediately recognized the direction we were heading in. The fun house was up ahead, far beyond the towering Ferris wheel. It was pretty all lit up, and a part of me wanted to ride it.
I thought better of it though. I wasn't here to enjoy the carnival. I was here against my will, and I needed to stay focused.
Lafayette waited for me near the same entryway as last time, his little kitty face the picture of innocence, but I didn’t buy it for a second.
“I don’t trust you,” I said, hands on my hips as I surveyed the line of grey faces funneling in through the entrance. They hadn’t been there last time.
Lafayette gave me a pitiful meow, standing back up on all fours and flicking his tail. The damn thing had a serious attitude problem.
“I thought we had a connection, you know,” I muttered.
He didn’t wait to see if I was following him and disappeared through the dark doorway. Little did he know, there was no way I was squeezing my body past all those people. My skin tingled unpleasantly just thinking about it, remembering the cool brush of that man's skin back at the fortune-teller booth.
“You’re going the wrong way, cher,” came a voice from behind as I attempted to creep away in the other direction.
I found Bael standing right behind me. He seemed to appear wherever he pleased without a word or a sound, and it was getting on my last nerve.
He was dressed in another tailcoat, this time a dark blue color that matched his eyes. His bare chest was adorned with various necklaces, including a large silver pendant with a thick sapphire in the center. His fancy leather pants were as tight as ever.
“You can blame your cat for
that. If I didn't know any better, I'd say he's leading me around like a crazy person because you told him to.”
I faced the fun house again, scowling, pretending like Bael hadn’t unnerved me.
“But you don't know any better, do you?" he asked, coming to stand shoulder to shoulder with me. “And Lafayette’s not mine, remember? Theodore would have my head for even insinuating otherwise. How the little beast tolerates his surly moods is beyond me.”
I looked up at him, and he met my stare right back. My mouth twitched, fighting the urge to grin. Bael was a ridiculous man, and it was hard to take him seriously.
I wondered if he and Theodore were even friends. It seemed like they were close with all their nonverbal conversations. But there was clearly animosity there too.
Did Theodore even have such a thing as friends? He didn't seem like the social type, not like Bael.
Bael looked particularly pretty today. Something about the sparkle of the lights around us and the way they played on his long blond hair was ethereal. It was like he wasn’t real or something.
I mean, he was real, of course, but there was an aura around him that screamed…other.
“Fear not,” he said confidently, linking his arm with mine and tugging me along. “I’ll show you the way, blue girl.”
“Oh, no! I’m not going back inside that freaking fun house.” We paused as my heels dug into the mossy ground. “You’re supposed to be helping me find my way out of here, remember?”
“I remember no such thing,” he said dumbly, looking aghast with his palm against his chest.
I scowled, unamused.
Bael sighed. “Fine. If you’d rather mingle out here with these fine folks, then be my guest, but they're not much for stimulating conversation.” He gestured at the grey faces, and before I could reign it in, I cringed.
Chuckling, he said, “That’s what I thought. Now stop wasting time, we have many things to do today.”
Turning on his heel, he strolled away from me, swagger fully in place.
“Today?” I frowned.
It was still dark out, and I couldn’t have been asleep for more than a few hours, right? I rushed to catch up with the frustrating man.
“Bael, please, can’t you just help me find a road or something? Maybe a neighbor or someone with a ferry? I need to get back home before—”
“Before what?” he snapped, turning to face me so fast that I rammed right into him before reeling back on my heels.
When I got my bearings, it was to find him glaring at me, looking more serious than he had since I’d met him. Then he pinched my chin between his fingers, forcing me to stare into his eyes. All humor was absent from them.
“Do not mince your words with me, Moria Laveau. Lying will only make your time here all the more unpleasant.”
Every word sounded like it was hissed through his teeth.
“Excuse me?” I choked out. “Who the hell says I’m lying?! If anyone’s been lying, it’s you!”
Suddenly, Bael was all hard edges, and a fire burned in his eyes. My throat tightened as I tried to swallow. He might’ve been quirky and way too handsome for his own good, but he was also incredibly terrifying.
We stared hard at each other for what felt like minutes while the sounds of the carnival dimmed in the background, replaced by the erratic thumping of my heart. He searched my eyes, still not releasing my chin.
“What are you so determined to return to?” he asked, his bitter tone lessening to a curious whisper.
It wasn’t the first time I’d been asked this question, and it wasn’t the first time I didn’t have an answer.
Was I lying to myself? What did I have to go back to exactly?
The first thing that flitted through my head was Austin’s face. Impatient, familiar, cruel. He was what I had to go back to. He was waiting for me in that apartment we shared. Probably sitting up in his armchair by the fireplace, darkness shrouding him entirely. He probably watched the door, waiting to catch me off guard the moment I stepped through it.
The thought of returning to that place, that cage, had a pit forming in my stomach. Bael was right, in a way—I was in such a hurry to leave this place, and for what?
He must have seen something in my eyes, because grip loosened and some of the anger drained from his face.
Instead of holding my chin and keeping me in place, he slowly ran his fingers down the curve of my jaw. The touch was intimate, and I wasn't sure how to handle the stirring in my belly.
“How do I know I’m safe here?” I asked, barely a whisper. “How do I know you won’t hurt me?”
Bael looked contemplative, his eyes following the movement of his fingers over my now clean skin.
His fingers twitched on my face just barely, and I flinched. It was completely involuntary. In my head, I knew he wasn't Austin, but the instinct was so ingrained now that I didn't have time to hide it.
A look of what I could only describe as rage covered his face. His eyes held promises of incredible pain and violence…only, not towards me. He cupped my cheek, running his thumb over my skin softly.
“I need you to understand something right now, Moria. You’re not safe anywhere.” My lips parted on a retort, but he continued, “Save for with me.”
How was I supposed to trust that? It would be stupid of me. Naïve of me. He must have seen the doubt in my eyes.
“I’m not a good man, I promise you that. But one thing I'll never do is cause you pain, understand? Whatever you came from, cast it aside, because it can't find you here.”
Did Bael even know it was a he, not an it?
“I want to show you something,” Bael said after a silent moment. “But before I do, I want you to try something for me.”
He waited, as if expecting an argument. I was fresh out of arguments at the moment.
“For just a while,” he said. “I’d like you to forget these ideas of returning to wherever it is you came from and simply enjoy where you are right now.”
“But—” I started to say, but Bael held a ring-clad finger to my lips, shushing me.
“Just for a little while, blue girl. Let me show you my home. You can decide for yourself after that, deal?”
“Decide what, exactly?”
I wasn’t sure what he meant. Decide to leave? Of course I had to leave. I had a life to return to, didn’t I?
“Do you trust me?” he asked.
“No.” I didn’t even pretend to think about it.
His smile stretched even wider, showing most of his pearly white teeth. He looked like a predator.
“Good girl.”
After trying to talk myself out of it and failing, I reluctantly followed Bael St. Claire back into the fun house.
I felt sick at the thought of going anywhere near the grey faces, but to my surprise and relief, he took me around the side of the building, past the shadows of the trees, and into a side entrance.
It smelled like sawdust, and the lights flickered annoyingly. There were mirrors everywhere, stuck to every single wall and even on the ceiling in some places.
I tried not to look into them as much as I could avoid it, but sometimes, it was impossible. I was surrounded by mirror images of myself—sometimes short, sometimes wavy or distorted, and sometimes broken up into little tiny shards that had no rhyme or reason to them.
It was disorienting, and if it hadn’t been for Bael’s hand in mine, I would have been lost again.
There was no music in the fun house, just silence and the sound of wind chimes that hung from the rafters, swaying in the small breeze that occasionally whistled around a corner. The sound of their chimes echoed off of every surface.
The lights played on the back of Bael’s blue tailcoat. Underneath the thick material, he was clearly muscular. Slender, yes, but muscular too. His shoulders were broad and his arms were thick, but he managed to look sleek at the same time.
He really was the most beautiful man I'd ever seen.
Theodore’s face a
nd bare chest flashed through my head, and heat traveled through me. Okay, so maybe it was a tie between them both.
Fuck, back before Austin took over my life, I'd have been all over both of them in a second.
It was probably a bad idea to let my eyes wander over him like this. It might give him all sorts of ideas. It’d been too long since I’d let myself look at a man without the fear that Austin would lose his mind.
As if hearing my innermost thoughts, Bael cast a sly look over his shoulder, his wide lips tipping up in a crooked grin. My palm grew sweaty, but his grip only tightened.
I had a feeling he knew the effect he was having on me. He was probably doing it on purpose, trying to get me to lower my guard.
Well, it was fucking working.
The hallways began to gradually darken, and I stumbled around a corner I hadn’t seen coming.
Bael’s grasp on my hand disappeared, and I caught myself against a mirror. Cursing, I righted myself and squinted up ahead, but I couldn’t make out much of anything.
Bael was gone.
Disappeared without me.
Damn him, of course he'd pull something like this. I wasn't sure why I was surprised.
There was a single flickering light in the distance, so I followed it.
“Bael?!” I called out, taking each corner slowly, trying to remember which way I was heading.
It was nearly impossible to navigate the fun house, and even if I tried, all it took was a single wrong turn and I could end up walking in the opposite direction or even a dead end.
There was no answer from Bael, because of course there wasn’t. He probably thought this was super funny.
I stopped in my tracks, searching the wooden rafters for a dangling boot or a passing shadow, but there was nothing but darkness.
“This isn’t funny!” I shouted, and my voice echoed down the hollow corridor. “See, this is why I said I couldn't trust you!”
Still no response.
Each mirror I passed distorted my image even more. Sometimes, I appeared ghostly pale with deep shadows under my eyes, and other times, I looked squat and stubby.