by Joy Rider
They loved each other and they didn't need sex to bring them together. They just cuddled each other all night.
Epilogue
I am writing this at my computer in my air-conditioned office in our little village in NE Thailand. Its early evening, and in a moment I will go out in the humid heat. I will sit at the concrete table at front of our house and have a beer with our neighbours and friends. There are always people in the street, with motorbikes, tractors, and vendors in trucks passing by. You get used to the bustling noise and activity. In this country you can never be lonely.
I feel comfortable and happy with my life. The people and their customs are wonderful, Suchin is a lovely wife, and our children are gorgeous.
As I read everything I have written, I can scarcely believe that it all happened. It seems almost like a dream. I have copies of some of the photos of Suchin, not the bad ones, but the earlier ones before things became so nasty. I know the worst photos of her and of me are still circulating around the Internet, but I won't even search for them. I thought of including some of the better photos of Suchin in here, but I won't now.... maybe later.
We are happy together, although sex is difficult. Suchin gets no enjoyment from it and sees it as a duty. I have difficulty in getting an erection unless I think of the gang rape. That's funny isn't it? The most horrible thing that has happened in my life and my body responds to it. I try not to think of it, so we don't have a lot of sex.
We are so very close though. We empathise with each other in every way despite our racial and cultural differences. I think it's like soldiers who have been through a war together; there is a strong bond between us forged in adversity. We have something that nobody else can ever understand.
I hope that Malek will not see this as abrogating our agreement. Malek is not his real name, nor is Suchin, as for me, well there have to be some secrets.
I often wonder about the woman who was stoned to death in Saudi Arabia. At the time I was sure it was Suchin, but I guess a combination of my expectation of it being her and my inebriation confused me. It's strange how the human mind works to fool itself. I never found out who it was that suffered such a horrible ending in place of Suchin. I just hope that the woman did it for a good reason, in some form of martyrdom. Perhaps she was dying of a disease and Malek paid money to her family, perhaps she thought she was going to paradise in support of a cause. I don't know.
I wrote this partly as I thought it might ease my nightmares and perhaps help me to recover my manhood, but mainly to let people know about the situation with Thai bargirls. You should know that they are not prostitutes in the Western sense. There are no drugs (apart from alcohol) and pimps associated with the bars. The girls are mainly from poor villages and have little education. They don't sell their bodies for the money, but to get a Western husband who they hope will lift them and their families out of poverty. Mostly they make fine loyal wives. So don't despise them, feel for them and love them. I do.