by Erin M. Leaf
After the last bell, she was finally able to escape, for once not lugging anything home with her to work on in the evening. She worried about driving, hoping none of the episodes would happen on the way home, but luckily the drive home was uneventful. She pulled into her short driveway, waved to her neighbor, and went into her small house, grateful to be home. She prepared a quick dinner, ate it standing up at the kitchen counter, then stripped and fell into bed, desperate for sleep. She dropped off right away, slipping into a heavy sleep despite the early hour.
The next thing she knew, it was dark and she was sitting up in bed, heart pounding. She flicked on the small bedside light and tried to calm herself, blindly looking around at her soothing cream walls and pale yellow curtains. The streetlight outside filtered through the soft fabric, twinkling in the darkness of her room. She didn’t feel rested at all.
When she closed her eyes, she remembered every dream as though it were real—Duncan growing up, having a hard time with his weight as a child until high school, teaching himself how to play guitar, losing the weight and realizing he could sing. She knew the exact moment he figured out he was bisexual and his very quiet experimentation during the one year he attended college until he dropped out to pursue his music career. She followed every step of his life from childhood to adulthood—his first record contract, the wild success of his first album, the two Grammys he won, and subsequent critical acclaim for his second album. She could sing every song on the new album, the one he was touring for now with his best friend and assistant, Jake Mackenzie. The memories weren’t sharp, not like her own. She knew the broad outlines of his life, but not the details that made them real. They felt like the memories learned in conversation with a friend.
She grasped the blanket closer to her chest, trying not to hyperventilate as she suddenly realized that she knew Jake, too. She knew the two men grew up together, and she knew that Jake was straight and had his heart broken by his high school girlfriend his second year of college. That was why he’d dropped out and finally taken the job Duncan had offered—manager, assistant, co-writer. She knew that he had an incredible laugh. He could play piano, and he’d helped create every single one of Duncan’s songs, though he refused to play onstage. She knew that they’d both grown up in New Jersey but that they lived in Brooklyn now, sharing a townhouse. Emma realized that she was crying because she felt like she knew the two men in her dreams as if they were her best friends, and that was so wrong. That was crazy and twisted, and she was obviously losing her mind, crying into her sheets in the middle of the night over two guys that she’d never even met. She sniffed and rubbed her nose, willing herself to stop it. She looked at her hands, vaguely surprised to find them so small and feminine after feeling guitar strings and piano keys under her fingertips for the past few hours. She couldn’t play an instrument if you paid her a million dollars. What was happening to her?
Emma threw back the covers and groped for her robe, suddenly realizing that she was nude. In her rush to get to bed, she’d just pulled off her clothes and crawled under the covers. She blushed, mildly embarrassed. She never slept naked. But Jake did, she thought then blushed again. Duncan wore boxers to bed, a result of growing up with two sisters. Jake was an only child. And with that thought, Emma nearly started crying again, because really, she must be insane. There was no way she could know these things. Her brain was making this shit up. She padded to the bathroom and rinsed her face then made her way to the living room. She flicked on the TV and sank into her couch, not surprised to find a rerun of her favorite late show on, even though it was two in the morning. What did surprise her was how familiar the stage and audience looked as the camera panned across the stage. Her heart began knocking against her ribcage. That was the same stage she’d dreamed about! When the camera zoomed in on the host, he held up a CD, Duncan’s new one. Emma laughed shortly and dropped her face in her hands. When she looked up again, she wasn’t at all startled to see Duncan playing the guitar. She knew every note of that song by heart. The strange thing was that she knew exactly when he would change up the melody for this particular performance, holding certain notes longer and others shorter than the version on the CD. She sighed and settled onto the couch, willing herself to relax. If she couldn’t stop the dreams, she may as well enjoy the music.
* * * *
“Man, I hate it when our flight lands in the middle of the night,” Duncan complained, running his hands through his hair. He and Jake were in the car Jake had arranged to take them home to Brooklyn from the JFK airport after taping a late show in LA earlier that day. Jake slumped down on the seat across from Duncan, trying not to fall asleep. His friend looked exhausted, and Duncan worried about him.
“Yeah,” Jake grunted, not opening his eyes. “And this damn headache is driving me crazy.”
“My head still hurts, too,” Duncan said, rubbing his temples. “And even though I slept a little on the plane, I had the weirdest dreams.”
“You too? I dreamed about this woman, I think she was a high school librarian. I haven’t thought about high school in years, and here I am dreaming about a teacher. She seemed so lonely.” Jake laughed. “Reminds me of that old Adam Ant video.” He grinned at his friend, but Duncan couldn’t bring himself to smile back.
“Wait, what? I dreamed about a teacher, too. I even know her name, Emma Bell.” Duncan frowned as Jake looked at him in disbelief. “What?”
“That’s the name of the woman I dreamed about.” Jake scratched his head. “Did we ever meet someone named Emma?”
Duncan shrugged. “No, not that I can remember, but you know how many fans I’ve met the past eight years? There’s no way I could remember all of them.”
“Well, even if you could remember someone named Emma, why would we both dream about her at the same time?”
Duncan shook his head, feeling his headache intensify. “What did she look like?” Jake smirked, and Duncan rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I know what she looked like to me. I want to know what she looked like in your dream.”
“She had long, wavy brown hair. And the most gorgeous hazel eyes I’ve ever seen. And she was curvy.” Jake rubbed his face. “She was really pretty. I dreamed about when she was a kid. Saw how she went to college after—” Jake broke off, seeing Duncan nodding.
“Yeah, that’s what she looked like in my dream, too. And her brother died. That’s when she went to school.” Duncan yawned and blinked his eyes, trying to focus. “What the hell is going on? Dreaming about the same woman? That’s just weird.”
“Yeah.” Jake closed his eyes again and slumped down. “I’m going to nap until we get home. Then I’m going to crash for two days, and then we’re going to do the concert at the Garden, and we’re gonna laugh about this. Because it can’t possibly be real.” He smiled as he folded his hands over his abdomen. “We are obviously still asleep and I’m dreaming up this entire scenario because of the profound lack of sex in my life this past year.”
Duncan laughed and very carefully did not look at the way Jake’s tight jeans displayed his slim hips. He also refused to notice Jake’s taut stomach and graceful hands. He had a lot of practice ignoring his attraction to Jake, and he wasn’t going to screw up now. “Okay, I’m game. If you think you’re dreaming, then we’ll see if either of us remember this tomorrow,” Duncan said fondly, eyes lingering on Jake’s relaxed smile as the car took them closer to home.
Chapter 2
The next morning, Emma woke to the sound of early morning news blaring details about the weather on the television. She winced, rubbing her neck as she heaved herself off the couch, then gasped as she saw the time. She was late for work! After a quick shower, she grabbed a muffin from the kitchen and headed to school. With luck she would get there in time for second bell. That should be okay, she thought. She’d been late before, but usually it was because she was sick or stuck in traffic. Luckily she didn’t have a homeroom to deal with. She pulled into her parking spot and headed inside, absently humming Duncan�
��s latest song under her breath. The melody was stuck in her head. It wasn’t half bad.
As soon as she entered the library, Julie accosted her, shrieking at a volume that would be unpleasant if the hordes of students in the hallway heading for their first class hadn’t already inured her eardrums to unhealthy levels of noise.
“Emma! You’re finally here! Oh my God, guess what?” Julie rushed over and hugged her.
Emma juggled her lunch bag and the books she was holding, trying not to drop her hot coffee. “Julie, careful, I don’t want to sacrifice today’s coffee to the floor. It was bad enough to go through the whole day yesterday caffeine deprived, I don’t want to do it again today.” Julie immediately pulled back, catching the book that slid from the top of the pile before it could hit the ground.
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m just so excited! Emma, you won’t believe what happened!” Julie hopped with excitement as she followed Emma into the library office.
Emma smiled. “You found your grandmother’s long lost purple afghan?”
Julie rolled her eyes. “Yeah, no. Try again!”
“Um, your great-uncle Ted died and left you a million dollars,” Emma teased as she walked to her desk. She put the coffee down with a sigh of relief.
“Yeah, I wish.” Julie snorted. “You suck at guessing.”
“Okay, okay. You have a hot date with the new art teacher?” Emma smirked at Julie as she organized her books, carefully stacking them between Julie and her coffee cup. The more protection her precious coffee had from her exuberant friend the better.
“The new art teacher is, like, eighty,” Julie said scornfully, ignoring Emma’s chuckle. “Okay, no more guessing. I won tickets!”
Emma grinned at Julie’s beaming face. “Tickets to what?”
“Tickets to go see Duncan Green in concert! Front row! And you’re coming with me!” Julie looked like she was about to burst with excitement.
Emma blinked, wondering when her life got so weird. “You won tickets to see Duncan Green? And you want me to go with you?”
“What are you, a parrot? Yeah, remember I was trying to win tickets all last week? I texted a zillion times and I won! I’m so excited! And of course I want you to come. I’ve been trying to get you to listen to his music for ages. And he’s hot. You’ll love him. He’s tall, dark, and handsome.” Julie rubbed her hands together.
Emma laughed. “He sounds like the hero from a romance novel. Okay, okay, I’ll come. Sounds like fun.” She took a sip of her coffee, wondering if she was going to regret this. “You know, I had a dream about him last night,” she said. She watched Julie’s face light up.
“Yeah? He’s so gorgeous, and his voice! Wow. I just melt when I hear him sing,” the younger woman rhapsodized.
“Yeah, must be all those songs you forced me to listen to at lunchtime. Now you’ve got me dreaming about him.” She shook her head, trying to make herself believe that what was going on with her was as simple as a dream. At least she hadn’t had any more of the weird hallucination episodes! “Hey, who is the other guy that hangs around Duncan all the time? He doesn’t play in the band but he’s always there. Curly dark hair, green eyes?”
Julie smiled. “Oh, that’s Jake Mackenzie. He’s Duncan’s manager or something. He’s his best friend. He’s been with Duncan almost from the beginning of his career. I think he even helps write the music, but you never see him onstage.”
Emma nodded encouragingly. “Why doesn’t he perform too?”
“Something about how Duncan is the star, the one who wanted to be famous. Jake’s been interviewed with Duncan, and he always says that it’s not his dream to be a rock star.”
Emma frowned, remembering too well how it felt to play the piano when she dreamed she was Jake. “Really? I thought I heard somewhere that he could play piano?”
Julie shrugged. “I don’t get it either. I love when they do interviews together because Jake manages to embarrass Duncan all the time. He’s the only one who can do that because Duncan is pretty much shameless. The last time they were on Oprah, Jake accidentally outed Duncan.”
“What?” Emma was confused. Duncan couldn’t be gay because she specifically remembered him thinking of himself as bisexual from her dreams. She blinked. Am I really thinking I know anything about him just because I dreamed it? I must really be losing my mind, she thought.
“No, he swings both ways,” Julie explained, unaware of Emma’s looming insanity. “Apparently, back when they were in high school, Duncan couldn’t decide whether he should date boys or girls and went to Jake with the dilemma. Jake thought up this funny idea where Duncan had to kiss both a guy and a girl. Jake said he thought that if Duncan tried both out, then the gender he liked better would be obvious. Instead of picking, though, Duncan ended up making out with both the guy and the girl. At the same time.” Julie laughed. “It scandalized their entire high school, and Duncan almost got suspended.”
“Suspended? I don’t understand.” Emma rubbed her forehead. “Why would it matter who he dated? I can see how it might have been frowned on, but still.”
“They were making out under the bleachers. During study hall.” Julie tried unsuccessfully to hold in her laughter so she wouldn’t disturb the students that were filing into the library. Emma chuckled, a smile breaking out on her face. Oh.
“Oprah nearly peed herself on TV when Jake told this story. No one knew that Duncan was bi, and then Jake just blurted it out like it was no big deal. It was awesome. His record sales went through the roof.”
“When was this?” Emma tried to remember if any of her dreams were from when the two men appeared on Oprah. She felt a headache coming on as she struggled to visualize it.
“It was about six months ago, right after he released his second album.”
Emma nodded then grimaced as a sharp pain lanced through her temple. She gasped, suddenly feeling as though someone was watching her. She whirled around, checking the office for stray students.
“Emma? Are you okay?” Julie asked, concerned. She looked around too. “We’re the only ones here.”
Emma struggled to focus. She swore she could feel someone there with her. “Yeah,” she said thickly. “I’m okay, a bit of a headache. I think I just need my coffee.” Julie nodded and Emma sat down, taking a big gulp of her drink. “I didn’t sleep well last night. I need some caffeine to wake me up.”
“I hear ya. Just don’t take too long to wake up, your first class starts in five minutes.” Julie hugged her friend then went off to check on the students out in the library. Emma nodded tiredly as she drank the rest of her coffee, trying to shove thoughts of Duncan and Jake and kissing from her head.
* * * *
“Well, yet another night with those crazy dreams.” Jake yawned as he entered the kitchen.
Duncan looked up from his laptop. “You too?” He grimaced as Jake poured himself some coffee. Duncan leaned back in his chair, watching as Jake propped a slim hip against their kitchen counter. The other man wore a pair of ratty sweats, and Duncan swore he could see the outline of Jake’s dick through the worn fabric. He snapped his eyes to Jake’s face, hoping the other man hadn’t noticed his wandering eyes.
“Yeah, me too,” Jake sighed, sipping the hot black coffee carefully. He looked at Duncan, green eyes tired. “I wish I knew what was going on.”
“I looked her up on the internet. Look.” Duncan swiveled his laptop around to show Jake. “She’s a high school librarian. That’s her photo. Nothing else about her on the web, but her students seem to like her.”
Jake walked over and leaned close. “You mean she’s real? I mean, I had a feeling, but still. This is really, really weird.”
Duncan nodded. “She’s real.”
Jake put his cup down on the table and clicked through the high school’s website. Duncan watched his friend rub his forehead tiredly. He could tell Jake’s head was still bothering him. He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair where the long strands dampened his
loose T-shirt. He suddenly realized his head hurt too and rubbed his eyes.
“Headache?” Jake asked, looking up, eyes serious.
“Yeah.” Duncan replied absently then dropped his hand to massage the inside of his forearm.
“Did you hurt yourself?”
“No, I don’t think so,” Duncan replied. “Why?”
“You’re rubbing at the same spot, and it looks like a bruise or something.”
Duncan frowned and looked at his arm. Jake was right. “What the hell?”
Jake sat down next to him, leaning closer to see the spot on his arm better. “It’s on both arms.” Jake pointed to Duncan’s other wrist.
Duncan pushed the laptop out of the way and laid his arms on the table, palms up. “What is going on?” he asked, staring at the faint outlines of—he had no idea. Something on his arms. He glanced at Jake then looked down at his friend’s arms. There was something there, too. He needed a closer look. “Wait, let me see your arms, too.” Duncan gestured to Jake.
Jake frowned but put his arms on the table. On both forearms, clearly visible against his lighter skin, were the outlines of similar shapes. “Shit! Is it an allergy?”