by KL Donn
“From the second you smiled at me, Hope, you’ve been mine.” The softening of his eyes and the gentle way he holds me help break away some of my fears.
“I want to say it back,” I tell him.
Letting go of my hips, Reed digs his hands through my hair, pulling me closer and holding me tightly. “You return it when you mean it. When you’re ready. I just need you to know where I stand. I want you, this baby, many fucking more babies afterwards, and definitely marriage. I want everything with you, and then I want it all again. For eternity.”
“Whoa,” I exhale. The conviction in his words has my entire body ready to hand over to him everything he’s asking for and more.
11
Hope
After making love on the couch again, Reed finally hauled us both into a shower before driving us to the mall to shop for baby furniture. We’ve been to three stores now, and I’m still not finding that perfect fit.
The trouble is I’m not even sure what I want. I love the rustic older style, with the whitewash, but then I remember she’s only a baby and won’t care.
“Does it really matter what we get? She won’t remember anyways.” Staring around the spacious store, I begin to feel like the walls are closing in.
“Pretty girl.” Reed’s soothing voice pulls me out of my hysteria, and he sits me down on a sofa before kneeling in front of me. “We do not have to buy anything today. We can wait until you find the perfect set.”
“Hi, there!” A perky salesclerk greets us with a friendly smile. “Can I help you find something?”
Reed looks up at her, and for a minute, my insecurity hits as I wonder if he thinks she’s pretty, then I recall his words from this morning, and I’m settled.
“Baby furniture,” he answers as he stands, helping me to my feet again as well.
Her smile widens further as she looks between us before her gaze lands on my modest stomach bump that is now highlighted by the form-fitting dress Reed asked me to where.
“Congratulations! We have a wonderful selection of sets from contemporary to rustic to vintage. Did you have a style in mind?”
I’m not sure, but she seems genuine, and that gives me the confidence to explain what I’m looking for. She bounces on her feet before I’m finished speaking. “We just got in the cutest rustic/vintage crossover set that I think will be perfect for you.”
Following the woman, Reed whispers in my ear, “I think she had a little too much coffee this morning.” I nod and giggle because he’s right. She is exceedingly happy, but I think that’s why I like her.
“What do you think?” The clerk steps out of the way, and I'm in awe.
“That’s perfect.” With a gracefully arched headboard and delicately carved molding design along the railings and legs, I’m in love. It’s more charcoal grey than the white I wanted, but it’s everything I desired.
“It’s a four-in-one as well, so crib to toddler bed, then a single day bed, and finally, a double bed. It’s the perfect structure and craftsmanship to carry your child or children through many years of use.” She points out the matching dresser and change table as well, and I just know this is the one for our little girl.
I pause at the thought.
It’s the first time I’ve thought of her as ours instead of mine, and I feel a weight lift off my shoulders.
Reed was right. When I was ready, my mindset would shift naturally. I can’t contain my glee as she helps out with the accessories to convert the bed as our daughter grows and even shows us the storage options for under the crib.
After buying all the matching pieces to fill out the set, she hands me a card for a baby store to get room décor, bedding, and everything else we may need.
With a heartfelt thanks, we’re off and expecting a delivery of the furniture the next day. The way Reed has been watching me through all this makes me feel like a queen. He’s certain to make sure I’m comfortable and content as we carry on shopping and grab a bite for lunch.
By the time we’re on our way home, with a quick stop at the gas station, I’m ready for a much-needed nap. “I’ll come in with you,” I tell Reed as he gets out. Raising an eyebrow at my request, I explain, “I’m thirsty.”
“I can get it.” He smirks.
“I don’t know what I want.” Which is typical for me nowadays.
Walking into the store hand in hand, Reed stands in line while I wander back to the coolers. Passing another mom with a sleeping toddler in a stroller and an older child standing next to her, I smile and glance up to see Reed regarding me. I’m sure he’s imagining the same thing I am.
Our family.
My gaze shifts to the cashier, and I frown. He’s tense, agitated as he deals with the customer at the register. Reed turns just in time for the stranger to pull out a gun and shoot behind the teller’s head, missing him by inches.
The loud bang wakes the sleeping baby and has the young child screaming and clinging to his mothers’ leg. Reed instantly jumps in action as he yells at everyone to get down. Seeing the mother frantically trying to remove the baby from the stroller around her other terrified child, I pull the little boy off her leg and into my chest as we lay on the floor. A second later, the woman's laying in front of me, the baby to her chest, and a hand on her other child’s head in comfort.
“It’s okay,” I whisper repeatedly. And I don’t know who I’m trying to convince, the mother or me.
The sounds of a scuffle make me want to look up, but I don’t want to risk myself or the child in my arms. I know it’s Reed and the robber. He wouldn’t allow someone like that to get away, even if he’s risking his own life.
Another shot is fired, and silence follows until sirens are heard. “Reed?” I scream his name. Terror has stricken me in place. Too afraid to find out if he’s hurt. Confidence in his abilities is what keeps me still.
“Police! Drop the weapon!” can be heard as officers enter the store.
“Sergeant Reed Burkhart. I’m off duty. This is the perp's weapon. He’s detained, but my pregnant wife is back there, I need to get to her.” I’ve never felt such whiplash in my emotions before.
The mother opens her arms to take the child I'm holding and mouths a sincere thank you as Reed rounds the corner of the aisle so fast he nearly slides to the floor.
“Are you okay? Are you hurt? What about peanut?” His own face is a mask of fright as he reaches a hand down to help me up.
Wrenching me into his arms so hard I bounce off his chest, I cry silently at the commotion we walked into. Knowing this day could have turned out much differently if he weren’t here to tackle the gunman when he had.
“I love you,” I sigh as his arms tighten around my back.
Breathing into my neck, I think he’s trying to inhale me. “I don’t know what I would have done if he hurt you.”
“We’re fine,” I comfort.
“Fuck,” he hisses as if he’s replaying the entire scenario in his head. “I love you, Hope. So fucking much, and I know I said I would wait, but this is twice in as many weeks that you’ve been in danger, and I fucking need you to tell me you’re mine.”
Sliding my hands up his chest, I cup his cheeks and pull him down until our foreheads touch. “I love you, Reed Burkhart, and I would like it very much if we could be yours forever.”
Without a word, his lips are covering mine, and we’re locked in our passion as the world moves along around us. It’s not until someone clears their throat that we pull apart.
The cashier and the mom with her boys are standing nearby as an officer waits for us to look at him. “Sergeant, if I could take your statement?” The officer seems young.
“Of course.” Reed nods, giving him the same respect as we follow the man outside to where there are more cruisers and cops.
Feeling lightheaded, I sit on a bench with a female officer and give my statement, recalling the events as they unfolded.
As soon as I’m finished, the little boy runs over and wraps his arms around
my neck, whispering, “Thank you,” before letting go and running back to his worried mother, who is joined by her husband.
Fresh tears roll down my cheeks as everything catches up with me at once.
Reed
I’m quick to give my statement to the patrolmen before the investigating detectives show up to ask me the same questions. Because I told everyone to drop, I was the only one who saw everything and could deliver the most details.
I don’t take my eyes off Hope while she speaks to another officer, and then the little boy runs up and gives her a hug. But after a moment alone, I can see she’s being bombarded by every emotion she understands and even more she doesn’t.
“I’m sorry, detective, I have to see to my wife. Can I come by the station in about an hour; after I get her home and her brother can come to look after her?” He appears reluctant but concedes to my request. Likely because I’m on the job too.
“Hope?” I call her name, and when her head pops up, I can see she’s dizzy. “Get a medic!” I call out, rushing to her as her body goes limp, falling forward. I catch her just before she can hit the ground. “Come on, pretty girl, wake up for me,” I coax her, and after a minute, her eyes begin to flutter open.
A paramedic is at her feet before she’s caught her breath. “Ma’am? Can you give me your name?”
Licking her lips, she tells him and answers all of his questions before requesting water and insisting she’s fine. He looks hesitant, but after listening to the baby’s heart rate through his stethoscope, he makes her promise to go back to the doctor as soon as she can and leaves.
“Come on, I’ve texted Luca to meet us at the house, then I have to get to the station and finish giving my statement. Then I’ll be home in time to make you those nachos you wanted for dinner.”
“Okay, Reed.”
Tucking my girl under my arm, I lead her back to my truck and head home. Luca is waiting for us as we pull up. His friend is with him. I really need to learn this guy’s name.
“What the hell happened?” Luca barks out as I’m helping Hope out of the truck.
I toss him the house keys. “Open the door.” As soon as we get inside, I lead Hope to the couch where she lays down on the chaise. Covering her with a blanket, I turn the television on and find North Woods Law, a show I learned she’s obsessed with and hit play.
“Who are you?” I finally ask Luca’s friend as I walk to the kitchen to get Hope a glass of water and her pills. Even though she doesn’t say it, I know she’s in pain.
“Coen Groves. Sorry we didn’t officially meet before.” I shake his offered hand.
“Shit happens,” I mutter. “Take this,” I instruct Hope, and she smiles up at me as she swallows the pill and burrows into the cushions.
“You guys good to stay with her? I should be home in about an hour, two tops,” I explain, not wanting to leave but needing to get this shit over with so I can be here tonight when she’ll need me more.
“Want to tell me what the fuck is going on?” Luca growls again, and Coen crosses his arms.
“Oh, sorry. We walked in on a fucking robbery at the gas station. Hope was never near the prick, but she went on emotional overload afterwards when everything hit her at once.” My chest constricts as I stare down at her tired body, thinking of all the things that could have gone wrong today. Grateful they didn’t.
“Fuck,” Luca groans.
“She protected a mother and her two children. Your sister’s a fucking hero, man.” We all share an admiring look at Hope, and she must sense it because she smiles up at us.
“Do what you gotta do; we’ll be here.” Luca reaches out a hand to shake.
“My partner's wife’s sister, Peyton, is stopping by with some tea and treats for Hope. Should be here soon, actually. Ever since she found out our girl is pregnant, she’s been all about finding the best recipes to ease morning sickness, backaches, digestion, and a bunch of other shit.” I laughed when Tillie told me that, but she was serious and has been sending things home with me for Hope.
“Sounds good,” Luca says.
“Don’t scare her off,” I tell him, knowing he’s grouchy and overprotective of his sister. Not that I don’t mind the last part. Coen laughs when Luca glares at me.
Leaving, I dread being away from my love. Two hours and I’m out of there. That’s all they get me for.
Epilogue One
Hope
A Few Months Later.
Sweat pours down my face, my back aches, and pride swells in my chest. I couldn’t be happier with the final product. Reed, Luca, and Coen have spent the last few weeks painting the baby’s room, twice, because I couldn’t make up my mind.
At first, I wanted a pastel pink, but after the furniture was assembled, it didn’t go well together. So when I settled on a lovely lavender, from the first test wall, I knew it was the right color. I’ve kicked them out of the room until I get everything else set up and decorated the way I like.
I’ve got a few of my favorite pictures of Leslie and Miles on the walls, so she always knows who they are. There are small knickknacks and teddy bears on the bookshelf in the corner. The dresser is topped by a lamp with a giraffe base sitting on it next to an empty photo album and baby book. A violet rug covers the floor in front of the rocking chair Reed surprised me with last week, and a pale-yellow blanket drapes across one arm.
But I think my favorite thing in the room is the mobile on the crib. It is a gift from Reed’s brother, Theo, and Lola. It has sea creatures hanging from it and plays the sound of the ocean. One of the most soothing sounds I’ve ever heard.
“Knock, knock,” I hear an accented voice call from the other side of the door and I crook my neck. Knowing Reed wouldn’t allow a stranger in the house, it must be someone he knows.
Opening the door to a dark-haired older woman with Reed’s eyes, instantaneously, I recognize her as his mother. “Hello.” I open the door further, and she hurries right in, and I see Reed down the hall with a wicked grin on his face.
Closing the door, I wait for her to speak first. “This is beautiful,” she murmurs. “Oh!” She cups her cheeks, and I see tears in her eyes as she stares at the white stained letters over the crib. “Leslie. Such a beautiful name. You will make them both so very proud.” I know Reed has explained what happened with my friends and whose baby I’m carrying.
“Thank you.” I walk over to stand beside her.
“Forgive me, child. I’m Phoebe; Reed's mother.” She wraps me in a tight hug, and I’m not sure whether it’s the hormones or the fact I haven’t been hugged so lovingly since my parents died, but tears stream down my face. “Sshh, Hope. You’re okay now.”
I can only nod as I pull away and wipe at my face with my hands. “I’m sorry.”
“No need to be. You’ve been alone far too long.” Holding my hand, she scans around the room with a smile. “You made some excellent choices in here. This grandbaby of ours will be very happy. And spoiled,” she adds, and I tear up at her words again.
“You’re very accepting of my situation,” I point out.
Turning back to face me with a serious look on her face, she explains, “Family isn’t always blood. We choose to give life, to love, to accept. And you, my dear, and this little one are family. Our family. We choose you, Hope.”
“Pretty girl?” I spin to see Reed in the doorway. Rushing over when he sees the tears hovering again, he pulls me into his arms. “I love you.”
“Thank you, Reed.” I always thought that Leslie and Miles' deaths were going to be what broke me, but it made me stronger. Proved that I was loveable and ready to begin my life with their baby.
Reed is the icing on every birthday cake I’ve never had and all the ones I’ll have in the future.
With my family at my side, I know I can handle anything life throws at me.
Epilogue Two
Reed
Staring down at Hope as she feeds our daughter, her eyes closed, humming a lullaby, I think I fall de
eper in love with them both. Leslie came screaming into the world a little over an hour ago after a harrowing eight-hour labor that damn near made me cry because I couldn’t alleviate Hope’s pain.
You’d never know it now, though. She glows with happiness. I’ve never seen her more radiant than in this moment.
“I think she’s done,” Hope murmurs, kissing the top of Leslie’s head, her light hair curly and soft.
“I’ll do it.” I take our daughter from her hands and lay her against my chest, rubbing gentle circles across her back and patting softly.
“Tell me I can come in now?” Luca pokes his head in. He’s been waiting for the nursing session to finish, and I’ve never seen a more eager uncle than this man.
“Come in, Luca.” Hope waves him in.
Handing the baby over to Luca, it’s comical how tiny she is in his hands. Luca is a big guy, and our girl is barely six pounds.
“Christ, she’s beautiful,” he murmurs as I sit next to Hope on the bed.
“Yeah, she is,” I whisper, kissing my girl’s temple.
“I meant the kid, asshole.” Luca laughs.
A knock on the door announces another guest, and my girl waves her in. Peyton, my partner's sister-in-law, enters with a bag of goodies.
Not seeing Luca holding the baby off to the side, she immediately begins talking. “Okay, so I’ve been playing with recipes and talking to nutritionists, and I have made the tastiest, and probably best cookies to help with lactation, so you don’t suffer through dry nipple–”
“Ahem.” Luca clears his throat, and Peyton spins to see him standing there. Her face turns brighter than a tomato. “I really don’t want to hear anything about my sister's nipples.
Over the past few months, Hope and Peyton have become quite close, and Luca is often a bit of his usual jerk-self to the girl.