“Thanks again!” I added, trying to lessen his shame.
“Sure,” Singer said kindly. He turned angrily to Lexa and muttered, “Maybe next time I’ll wait inside and avoid being treated like a child, big sis.”
Lexa shook her head disapprovingly at him. As he rushed into the cafeteria, we rolled off to the main gate. It was a massive concrete structure, built by the military to keep anyone or anything from getting in. There was a small armory there, where we checked out some sidearms. Only Buba went without one. I had decided he was just too young and overexcited to handle firearms. It was clear he wanted one, but he didn’t complain.
There was this sense of wonder that came up when the gates opened and you looked out at the road. A mixture of freedom and fear. Out there, there were no walls to hold you back, or keep you safe. It had been a while since anyone had seen any demented around... or bandits... in fact, the whole region was pretty deserted, for the most part. Still, we didn’t dare take it for granted.
I started delegating functions, “Lexa, you can take point today, we’ll follow your lead. Mouse, you keep an eye out behind us, okay? And Buba, please keep close to me this time. No more wandering off, huh?”
“Yes sir, Captain!” they all replied together.
I rolled my eyes at them.
"What about me?" Ranger asked, "I wanna play too."
I gave him an annoyed look and retorted, "You’d have to call me captain. I thought you said you'd NEVER call me that."
He just laughed at me.
I sighed and cried, “Let’s move out people!”
One of the guards called out to us, as we passed through the gates, “Good luck out there, Miss Brightman! Y’all be safe now!”
“Thanks! We will!” I replied.
Outside the town walls, nature had reclaimed most of the farmlands. Bushes had grown back over the old crop fields, barns were broken down, with trees growing through them, and there were vines growing up all the fences and light posts. Old rusty cars blocked half the roads, snapshots of another time. There were skeletons everywhere, on the sides of the road, in the cars, around the houses... It always amazed me, how many people there used to be in the world, how many had died. We made our way into the woods, leaving the skeletons behind. We wandered for a long while in silence. It was really cold.
“Damn,” said Mouse, at one point, “There’s nothing out here, not even those damn chicken.”
Wild chicken were the most common game. They say they used to be normal farm chicken, before all the farmers died. I never understood how they didn’t freeze to death. But they adapted, somehow. Usually, they were everywhere. Not that day though.
“It’s too cold,” Lexa pointed out, “even for the chicken.”
“Yep,” I agreed, “Our only chance is to find their hiding places. You can forget big game today, that’s for sure.”
“Well,” Mouse considered, “at least it’s not windy, we can see for miles and the cold doesn’t feel so bad.”
Buba huffed and said, “Yeah, my lungs feel like they might pop, but it’s fine. No big deal.” It wasn’t as much a complaint as it was a joke.
Ranger chuckled. “Who needs lungs anyway?”
As we pressed on, the sky began to clear up. It was a good sign. We knew the animals usually started popping out to look for food when the sun was out. Sure enough, it wasn’t long before we spotted the first group of chicken.
“You’re up, Buba,” I whispered, letting him take the first shot, “Remember, breathe easy, take your time...”
He drew his arrow slowly, took aim just as I had taught him and waited. When he released the arrow, it flew with perfection, skewering the bird right through the heart. The other chicken scattered, but the one fell dead.
“Nice!” I praised.
We took turns, shooting at those poor dumb birds. I loved watching Ranger shoot, he had such perfect form, like poetry in motion. My guys weren’t half bad themselves, but they weren’t on the same level as him. Mouse had a very functional style, precise, but not very elegant. Lexa was kind of elegant, but she sometimes missed the mark. Buba was still learning and myself... actually, I didn’t really know what I looked like shooting an arrow.
It was a long day, but in the end we had quite a few bags of chicken and squirrels to bring home. Lexa also found some berries, which would make for a nice pie.
In the afternoon, I figured we’d get a fire going and eat some roasted chicken together, before heading back. Sitting around a fire, chatting and laughing... life almost felt good out there. It was a pity Xandy wasn’t there. Maybe one day I’d teach him to hunt. Then he could come along and we’d never have to stay apart. Of course, I knew that would never really happen... my brother was...
- - - - - - - - -
It’s, um... getting late. I... I should get some sleep. Yeah, it’s really cold tonight too, like I mentioned earlier, and I should get under the covers, keep my brother warm.
Just to wrap it up: We had a decent hunt today, came home with enough to justify having gone out. On the way back, we ran into a bit of a snowstorm. It wasn’t too bad, just cold as hell. That storm is actually still raging out there. The town is going to be under a shitload of snow tomorrow morning. They might just have to cancel all the scheduled outings. We’ll see.
Good night.
Okay, I’m here again... I can’t sleep. My mind just won’t settle down. It’s about my brother... Xandy... He’s a special kid... in more ways than one. By the time my dad noticed it, there were no more doctors around... not the right kind anyway. When I said my brother was traumatized... it’s true, but there’s more to it than that... I think he might be autistic or something. I’m no doctor, I don’t know. But that’s why people stare. That’s why he doesn’t get along with the other kids... That’s why he’ll never be able to go hunting with me...
He’ll be a kid forever.
Entry 04
February 28th, 47
Quick update
It's been about a week now since my last entry. I tried sitting down to write a few times, but... it just... I guess nothing important came to mind, only boring everyday stuff. Plus we were snowed in the whole week. The council didn’t let anyone go outside the town walls. So, there haven’t even been any hunting days to write about. If I'm going to write, I want to get into something worth writing about, you know? Nothing interesting has come up yet, but... I suppose it's better to keep the journal up to date. So here I am.
The snowstorm kept coming and going there for a few days. This afternoon, the sun finally reclaimed the sky, but no one has gone out hunting or scavenging yet. There wasn’t enough time left in the day. It was actually pretty warm outside today, the snow started melting and everything.
With regards to Flavian, strangely, things have kinda gone back to normal, if you can call it that. I mean, he still comes around every now and then, greets everyone politely and all that. No one really talks to him anymore though, not even to avoid the awkwardness. He tried to talk with me a few times, as if nothing had happened. I just ignored him, as Bibi or Stone kept him away. Seriously, I dunno what goes through that guy's mind. Flavian acts like he's fine, but... I just... I can't help thinking he's going to be trouble. It doesn't help my paranoia any.
I don’t really know if I should write about this, but... well, Ranger has been sticking around a lot lately. Since we weren’t allowed to go out hunting, I’ve been giving archery classes everyday this week. For some reason, Ranger started showing up at my classes. Not that he “attended” them or anything, he just dropped by to chat. We’ve been talking a lot. It’s been kind of fun, having him around. He’s a funny guy... and yet... I still don’t really know much about him. To be honest, I can’t even remember what we talked about. It was mostly just random stuff, I guess. I did ask him about the end of the world once though.
By the way, there's something I've been wanting to put on paper... just for the record. It's actually a bit silly, but... Well, once in a
while, people talk about how things got to be the way they are. We call it the "end of the world", but the world hasn't really ended. I mean, we're still here... what's left of us. Today, in archery training, for example, I caught the kids chatting about it again. Everyone has a different theory. Maybe they're all right to some extent, or perhaps no one really knows what happened anymore. I figure, as long as I'm taking up this hobby, I might as well register my own theory. I don't actually have one yet. I was always more focused on survival and never took the time to think about things. But through the years, I've seen things... and I lived to tell the tale. So, what tale do I have to tell exactly? I'm still figuring it out. When I started writing this journal, my goal was more of a personal one... it still is I guess... looking back on my own life is important to me. However, I realize now that my life and the end of the world... they're essentially one and the same. According to what my father told me, I was born more or less around the same time things started going bad... ironic...
When I asked Ranger what he thought had happened, he gave me a strange answer. Like me, he doesn’t have much of a theory of what happened, but he seems to think that we deserve this life. To him, it’s like humanity is being punished for what we’ve done to the world. It’s a view I had never really considered. And he seemed a little surprised to hear me asking him about stuff like that. Ranger is a lot like me in some ways. I don’t think he cares too much about what happened. He just seems to focus on the task at hand, on living through to the next day. I can relate to that.
I sometimes wonder what makes a person a survivor. In similar situations, why does one person give up and another choose to fight? What made my father such a fighter? Was it Xandy and me, because we depended on him? Or was it something else, something that was intrinsically part of him? During those crazy days, when the disease was spreading, many people killed their own families... Ranger doesn’t seem to have anyone or anything to fight for, other than his own life... and he’s still alive. It all makes human nature seems so arbitrary.
Anyway, that's it I guess. I'm going to try to take a step back and remember how things went down... at least from my perspective. I want to have my own theory of how the world ended. I've already been taking some notes, but it's all still very raw in my mind. For now though, that’s all I have to say, so...
Good night.
Entry 05
March 1st, 47
Boys will be boys
Okay, so something is definitely going on with the guys. I think they might be fighting... over ME... or something like that, I dunno. Maybe I’m misreading the whole thing, but if I am, it’s like nothing makes any sense anymore. But let’s slow down here, start from the beginning. Today wasn’t just about them. We had a great hunting day, for one, even got a handshake from Old Man Harper himself for it.
We finally went out hunting again this morning. It was just amazing, one of our best performances yet. It was a shame Ranger wasn’t there with us, he missed out on all the glory. With the clear weather, we found a small group of deer wandering through a clearing.
- - - - -
The weather was so good that we had decided to go a little bit further, looking for a new hunting spot. We were rolling through the woods, when Lexa gave us the signal to stop. She was leading the way again and had seen something. Jumping off her bike, she took a knee and studied the ground in front of her for a moment. Then she suddenly turned and gestured for everyone to get down. We all hit the dirt and waited as she looked around for something. I drew my bow and did the same, but there was nothing out there that I could see. The birds were still chirping and the wind was still blowing softly. Nothing seemed out of place. When Lexa gave me the signal, I crawled up to her.
“Dana, look,” she whispered, “deer tracks. And by the look of those droppings there, they passed through here not minutes ago.”
I could see several sets of tracks. “Wow!” I said, keeping my voice down, “How many do you think?”
“Oh, five at least,” she replied, “maybe six or seven.”
“Holy shit, Lexa!” I told her, “It’s almost too good to be true. Let’s try not to blow it.”
I crawled back to Mouse and Buba and informed them of Lexa’s findings. “We have to move fast,” I began, “but not a sound. I’m looking at you Buba.” I pointed at him.
He shrugged as if he didn’t know what I was talking about, but then quickly nodded, accepting my words.
I went on, ”Let’s chain the bikes around that tree there. We’re going on foot. Mouse you go on ahead with Lexa, we don’t want to lose that trail. I’ll help Buba with the bikes. Wait for me though, Lexa isn’t the best shot. I want to try and take at least two of those deer down.”
There was never really anyone around to steal our bikes or anything, but we didn’t take any chances. We always chained them down. Once we were done, Buba and I went looking for Mouse and Lexa. We found them only a few yards away, hiding behind a tree. Out ahead of them was a huge clearing. We could see the deer grazing out in the open, eight of them. There was one big male, six does and a baby deer.
“Alright,” I whispered, “here’s what we’re gonna do. We leave the male and the doe with the baby. We aim for the two does on the right there.” I pointed out the two I meant, they were the ones closest to us. “Lexa and I aim for the one on the left. Mouse and Buba, you go for the other one, okay? We all shoot at the same time, on my mark. Everyone clear on what to do?”
They all nodded at me.
“Boys versus girls,” Buba noted, “Betcha we win!”
I glared at him, but didn’t argue. I cocked my head at the does and we slowly took up position. I gave everyone enough time to focus. The does were pretty far off, but if we went out into the open they’d see us for sure and it’d all be over before we had a chance. It seemed like an easy enough shot for Mouse and I, but I wasn’t as confident about Lexa and Buba.
When I thought I had given them enough time, I whistled. It was our standard signal. The arrows flew beautifully. The doe I was aiming for took a hit straight to the heart and fell over trembling. The other one took an arrow to the back and another to the leg. The other deer all darted away, disappearing into the woods at the other side of the clearing. The doe the boys had shot tried to follow them, but stumbled after a few steps. I quickly jumped out into the clearing, drew another arrow and set it loose. I was on fire that day, it was another lethal shot.
“Alright!” Buba celebrated, singing, “Go Captain! Go Captain! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!”
I glanced back at him and shook my head, but ended up smiling at his hype. It was a hunt worth celebrating after all. We had never shot down two deer before. The first deer I shot was already dead when we got to it, but the other was still breathing.
“Sorry, girl,” I said honestly.
I pulled out my hunting knife and finished her off as quickly and humanely as I could. Buba and Mouse went to get our bikes, while Lexa and I proceeded to gut the deer. The other hunters had trucks, they could bring a whole deer back with them. We had to chop our game down to size, to pack it onto our bikes. Just getting back home was a real workout, the bikes were really heavy. We could have used Ranger’s help. But we were all so happy, it really didn’t even come to mind until we got back home. And even then, it didn’t bother us any. No one else had brought back so much venison. It was a real victory for us. Some people even cheered us as we got to the store house.
We got back so early that we even decided to go back out again. The second trip wasn’t as successful, but we managed to get a few bags full of chicken to add to our contribution. It was awesome.
- - - - -
Now the storehouse is full again and the townspeople are happy. The other hunters had good outings as well, yesterday and the day before, but I think we actually came out on top this time. I try not to antagonize them, but it was hard not smiling today. We deserved a little spotlight. And we got it too, regardless of what we did.
- - - - -
> We were putting the hut in order as we always did after hunting trips. We had to clean the blood off the bikes, put our gear away in the cabinets and make sure everything was in place. Only Lexa wasn’t there, she had gone out to get her girls from school. Just as we were starting up, there was a knock on the door. It was Singer.
“Hey, Dana!” he greeted me cheerfully, “I heard about the hunt. You guys are awesome!” he looked at the others and added, “Maybe now people will start to see how great you all are, huh? God knows you deserve it.”
Mouse replied happily, “Thanks man!”
Singer turned back to me and said, “I’m so happy for you, Dana, really I am. I know how hard it’s been for you this past year. This might just be your big break.”
“Thanks Singer,” I replied simply, “I guess now I have another interesting day to put into my journal.”
“Interesting? More like EPIC!” he declared, winking.
Just then, Bibi barged in through the door, with Xandy in her arms. She set him on the floor and they both charged at me wildly.
Bibi grabbed me and cried, “Fuck yeah, Dollface! Way to show those asswipes who’s the man! You’re fuckin’ awesome bitch!” She lifted me off the floor, squeezing me as tightly as she could.
I laughed at her excitement. “I can’t breath, Bibi,” I panted, “And I don’t really want to be the man. I’m happy just being left alone.”
She released me and pointed out, “Well, they’re going to leave you the fuck alone now.”
I picked my brother up and hugged him, “Hey baby, did you miss me?”
He hugged me back and said, “I missed you, Dana.”
Dead End Chronicles (Book 1): Dead End Journal Page 5