Alex (In the Company of Snipers)

by Winters, Irish

  The hospital patio door swooshed open behind him, and right on schedule, Mother gushed like he had been missing a year. “So this is where you are. I’ve been looking all over for you.”

  He turned away. She found me.

  “Well, that last contract’s written just like you wanted. It’s setting on your table, all ready for you to sign when you get back to bed. I put one of them sticky tabs on it so you can feel your way through it. Just be sure you sign right next to that tab, okay?” She pulled up a chair beside him. “Course I’ll show you exactly where to sign if you need more help.”

  The fragrance of her expensive perfume wafted over him like a stifling sauna. He wondered if she bathed in it. Why use a drop when a pint will do? He wanted to move. Where’s that orderly?

  “I sure wish you’d tell me when you go gallivanting around the hospital though. I got better things to do than wander all over this place looking for your ornery butt.” She chastised him like he didn’t sign her payroll check.

  Alex said nothing. Mother took too many liberties. He wished she would respect the line between employer and employee, but also knew why she didn’t. Mother was a genius, pure and simple. She didn’t need the job as much as he needed her. She knew it, too.

  “Merciful heavens, I wish you’d let me do the negotiating the next time the Army comes calling. I’m sure I can get more bang for your buck, pardon the pun.” Mother chuckled to herself. “I mean we are talking about covert surveillance and snipers and all, right?”

  Alex didn’t reply. No need. Mother was a veritable talking machine. All output.

  “So what’s next, Boss? You need me to run grab you a Starbuck’s coffee or anything?”

  “No thanks.”

  “How about a glass of water? You need a drink? You look kinda thirsty sitting out here in the sun like you are.”

  “No.”

  “Well, then do you want me to place any calls for you? You know, maybe to Harley or David back at the office? I hear Jed McCormack called this morning. So how’d that go?”

  “Fine.” He contemplated returning to his room. Where’s the orderly?

  “Come on now, Boss. Let me call someone. Talking with one of your friends is a whole lot better than sitting here feeling sorry for yourself, you know what I mean?”

  “I’m fine, Mother.”

  “Well then, how about I ring up Kelsey’s sister? I still got her number from the last time you wanted to talk to her, and—”

  “Stop.” Alex held up a hand to silence Mother. If only.

  Her voice kicked into wheedling gear. “At least you could talk with her, Boss, and find out how Kelsey’s doing. I mean, if you’d learn to listen sometimes, instead of always—”

  “For hell’s sake Mother, give it a rest.” Alex snapped.

  Mother was quiet only as long as it took her to take another breath. She sniffed as if offended, but Alex knew better. Mother was a master manipulator, and all that sniffing was just another tool in her vast arsenal of ways to get what she wanted and around people. “Well, I guess the important thing is you’re feeling better, never mind how she feels. And just so you know, I’m flying back first thing in the morning. There’s no sense in staying where I’m not wanted.”

  “Good.” Thank God and United Airlines.

  “I knew you’d be saying something rude like that. How long are you staying in the hospital? When are you coming home? Do you know yet?”

  “Soon.” So freaking pushy.

  “And when you going to try that walker or that cane? You have to move on you know, you can’t just sit in a wheelchair for the rest—”

  “Mother. Sasha. Enough.” Alex bellowed at the top of his voice. “Enough already.”

  “Well, I just—”

  “This is the first day I’ve left the room. Give it a rest.” He heard her huff and sniff. Leave me alone.

  She sat drumming her fingertips on the armrest, no doubt as exasperated with him as he was with her. Their problem was always the same. He wanted to know what time it was, and she tended to tell him how to build the clock, how to set it, dust it, and where to put it on the mantle. He kept his personal life private while she was an open book, and an audio book at that. He didn’t share, and she continually pried.

  “So. Have you talked to Murphy lately?” She wouldn’t give up.

  “Every day.” Alex sighed deeply.

  “Well, okay then. I’m going.”

  It’s about time.

  Mother rose from the chair and gave him a gentle hug. “I’ll stop by in the morning before I leave.”

  “I’ll be here.” He rolled his wheelchair backwards into the shade. Instantly an orderly asked if he was ready to return to his room. Alex nodded in relief.

  Twenty-Five

  Kelsey

  Good ole Harley.

  Kelsey brought a plate of homemade chocolate chip cookies along with the icy drinks to the living room. As she sat down on the couch, he drank a full glass and devoured several cookies. She smiled to see his appetite. Within minutes she refilled his glass and waited for him to talk. Sunburned and windblown, his hazel eyes sparkled from the white mask left by his sunglasses. He snagged another couple cookies.

  “Well, you may not know this about me, Kelsey, but I’m a man of few words,” he said with his mouth full.

  “I don’t know much about you at all, Harley, except I owe you my life. You’re my friend,” she said quietly. “But let’s get to the point. Why are you here?”

  “I’m on a mission, ma’am.” He started again. “It’s kind of a mission from God, if you know what I mean.”

  Kelsey leaned back into the sofa with her arms crossed. “What? Alex send you?”

  Harley smirked. “Well, he does think he’s God sometimes, doesn’t he? But no, he doesn’t have a clue I’m even in the country. I had Murphy tell him a story about me being on some operation in Turkey. Anyway, the boss isn’t himself right now, so he fell for it.” Harley watched from his side of the couch. “Which is really saying something because Alex doesn’t fall for much.”

  Kelsey heard what Harley didn’t say. Not too long ago Alex had fallen for her. Did that make her special? She used to think so.

  “I’d like to think I’m here more as your friend than anything else.”

  “I’m worn out, Harley. I’m tired.” Kelsey brushed a tear off her cheek and looked away. “I’ve had the year from hell. What do you want?” She had seen the tenderness in his eye, the last thing she needed.

  “Okay, so here’s the deal.” He blurted it right out. “Alex is an idiot.”

  Leave it to Harley to make her laugh. She felt the quick rise of tears just the same.

  “You know, I’d just got out of rehab. I didn’t know anything about Alex and you til that night,” he said quietly.

  “You were in rehab all the time you were missing?” Kelsey leaned back into the couch cushions behind her. She would have never have guessed Harley for a rehab kind of a person. He looked like a big kid with his wide-open smile, sun-bleached streaks scattered through his brown hair, and sunglasses perched on the top of his head. Murphy had told her Harley was from up-state New York, but he could pass for a cowboy any day of the week. She wondered how he came to develop that alternate persona.

  “Yes, ma’am, I was. I’ve been kind of a mess since I got home from Iraq. Done a lot of crap I ain’t proud of. You know, when you get down so far you can’t get up, well that’s when you figure all you got left to do is to pull your head out of your … ah …. ” He stuttered as he corrected his language. “I mean, then you pull yourself up by your boot straps and do something smart for a change.”

  She smiled at his bright eyes. It touched her that he tried not to cuss around her. Much. “Was rehab hard?”

  “Yes and no. This one was tougher than others I have been in.” Harley blew out a big sigh. “You’ve got to understand something about addicts, Kelsey. We’re mean, thoughtless, selfish people. I didn’t care who I hurt when
I was using. Heck.” He looked away, scrubbing a hand over his face before he continued. “My Mom and Dad won’t have a thing to do with me anymore. I’ve put them through hell. I don’t blame them.”

  She let him talk, but it was hard to see the man he had just described. He looked handsome, strong, and healthy sitting there on Louise’s couch.

  “I’m an addict. I won’t lie to you. Right now I’m clean. I don’t drink booze either. It’s all the same crap, and I don’t go near it. Any of it.”

  “What made you seek help?”

  “It’s crazy, but ….” He scrubbed his face again. “I thought of my boss. Alex believed in me, and I threw his trust back in his face like it was nothing. But I woke up one day and I just didn’t want to be me anymore. I wanted to be like him.”

  “The rehab helped?”

  “Nope. Not right away, it didn’t. You know, none of them places work unless you really want the help. This time I was lucky. I got a good counselor. Sonny served in Iraq, plus he’s a recovering addict. It makes a difference when you’re talking with someone who understands what you’ve been through.” Harley leaned back into the couch; every cookie long gone and his fingers licked clean.

  Kelsey saw the honesty behind those boyish eyes. Harley wasn’t complicated by a long shot. He just wanted to be in control of his life, to be free from the drugs. He wanted to live.

  “I ain’t gonna lie to you. That crap’s still calling my name. Sometimes, it’s all I can do not to go looking for my old friends. That’s why I need to work. My job’s real important right now.”

  “You tried to get me to pray that morning, didn’t you?”

  “Mostly I just wanted to keep you talking. You scared the hell out of me.” He shook his head remembering.

  “Me, too.” Her words were soft. “What happened then?”

  “So, anyway ….” Harley went on about how he had dropped into his old office hoping he still had a job. He explained how the BOLO from Washington police, the Be on the Look Out warning, had alarmed The TEAM, and how he had taken Whisper and Smoke to Washington state the same afternoon on an Air Force C-130 transport into Joint Base Lewis-McChord. He told her how he had found Alex, but then left him with only a gun and Smoke, because Alex made Harley promise to find her. And lastly, Harley told her how scared he was when he found her, how he thought he had lost two of the most important people in his life.

  “Now wait a minute.” Kelsey stopped him with a hand to his arm. “You didn’t even know me. How could I have been one of the most important people in your life?”

  “Simple, Kelsey girl. You’re the most important person in the world to him, and that’s good enough for me.” Harley winked. “That’s how it works. I’ve got his back even when he’s the biggest idiot in the world, and I know he’s got mine.” He paused for effect. “And Alex is the biggest idiot in the world.”

  Harley made her smile. It felt good to talk with someone who knew Alex.

  “The man can’t help it, darlin. He’s got this bigger than life persona, this huge idea of how to live and make a difference. He’ll never be a nine-to-five kinda guy. Alex has too much to give, too many people to save, too much ….” Harley took a deep breath, but Kelsey stopped him again.

  “I get it Harley. He’s an idiot. I get it.”

  She bit her lip and turned away before she broke down. She would go back to Alex right this second, but his last words still rang like curses in her ears. One thing she knew for sure, she would not live another life of abuse.

  Harley took her hand and wrapped her fingers around a familiar object. He smiled that crooked smile. “I found this in one of their jackets that morning.”

  She gasped. Once again Kelsey held the diamond solitaire ring she thought she had lost forever. In a flash she was back beside a crackling fire, looking into hopeful blue eyes, listening to Alex’s voice, husky with emotion. “Will you do me the honor of marrying me, Kelsey? Will you become Mrs. Alexander Stewart?”

  The fire within the stone still sparkled, but so much had happened since that night. It felt like forever ago. Kelsey stared into the brilliant rock. She had felt like a lost treasure in his arms, finally found and cherished, but she also remembered his crushing last words. “Get out of my life.”

  Harley interrupted her reverie with a gentle hand on her shoulder. “The thing is, me and Mother been talking since you left. We think this started when the boss had that last heart attack. You know, Alex might be a tough ex-Marine and all, but I’ll bet he thought he was gonna die. He was scared. I think the man just didn’t want to put you through the pain of watching him die, too. You’ve already had more than your share, Kelsey girl.”

  She blinked back the tears that fell anyway. She had heard the telling single word. Too. Tommy, Jackie, and Alex—too. They were all part of the same heartache, the same wretched purgatory, and she had lost them all. Nick had stolen her boys, and Alex had sent her away as if distance between his life and love was a lesser pain. And she had gone. Like a fool she had gone.

  Ah. Kelsey knew now she should’ve screamed her refusal to leave. She should have presented him with other more physical options. She should have told him to shut up and kiss her. Anything. She should have done anything, but leave. It was her choice, too. They were both idiots.

  “The doctor’s releasing Alex this week, and even that news didn’t perk him up none. The man’s a mess without you. He knows it. He just ain’t smart enough to know how to fix it.”

  Kelsey knew Alex loved her. Even as she left him, she knew.

  “Whatcha thinking, Kelsey girl?” Harley gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze. “Would you ever consider coming back with me and giving my idiot boss a good talking to? I’ve got a pretty fast truck and two hound dogs ready to travel to the ends of the earth, just for you.”

  And there it was – the real reason Harley was here. The cookies gone, the question asked, the perfect end to a tragic love story just waiting on her answer. She breathed out a big sigh and studied him again. Harley was an enigma, a highly qualified sniper who had killed men for his country, yet a simple man who had learned to rely on the Lord. It was obvious he idolized Alex, and she knew without a doubt Harley cared for her, too. Here he was again, come all the way to Pendleton, out in the middle of nowhere Oregon, trying to save the two most hopeless people ever.

  “You make it sound so easy.”

  Harley didn’t say a word.

  “I’m getting my own place in town pretty soon, and then I’m going to start teaching again, and then ….”

  Harley held his breath.

  “And I am so sick of crying.” She jumped off the couch, stalked through the kitchen door, turned around, and came right back into the living room.

  “I can’t do this again!” she ranted. “You come down here like its no big deal to ask me to go back to him. Back to what? Like I’m a ping-pong ball that just keeps bouncing back for more? Hit me again. Yeah, hit me again. Knock me down, just one more time. Punch me. Beat me. Scream at me. Well, I can’t do it anymore, Harley. Do you hear me?”

  With that outburst, she marched into the kitchen again only to turn on her heel and march right back to where poor Harley sat dumbfounded on the sofa. With her face drenched in tears, she knew she was making a fool of herself, but she couldn’t stop. Her voice grew squeakier and squeakier as the torrent poured out.

  “I think I deserve better. I mean, I buried my boys already and that’s my fault, because I’m … I was their mother. I should’ve protected them. I should’ve left Nick. I should’ve run.”

  Her tears fell like rain. Once more she stomped into the kitchen, so angry she only half knew what she was shouting about. This time she was only gone long enough to grab a dishtowel to mop her face. She came right back, a frenzied tigress taking her anger and frustration out on the only man standing. Poor Harley sat there and took it without batting an eye.

  “I thought Alex loved me. For once in my whole stupid, messed up life – I thought I�
�d met the man of my dreams. I am so dumb.” She outright wailed she was so upset and hurt and mad. “It’s not like I was at the mall shopping that night. I know what they did to him.”

  Kelsey gulped back a suffocating sob as that night came back into focus. She stood in the dark again, her heart pounding in terror as Buck dragged Alex through the fire pit and tied him to the tree. The thought of that first cut took her breath away again.

  “I was there,” she said with sudden, eerie calmness. “I know they c-cut him, and k-kicked him, and he’s hurt and ….”

  She stared. The knowledge of how much she ached to hold Alex stormed her foolish heart. Kelsey could almost feel him in her arms. He needed her. Despite the miles between them, she heard him whisper her name. Somewhere out there he was calling to her. The man was hurt to the point of death only because he had stood between her and danger. All the anger in the world could not deny the continuous cycle of strength and protection he had offered. Her screaming tirade ended with a sad whisper.

  “I’m hurt, too. I’ve had enough.”

  This time when she went to the kitchen, she slammed the door behind her. The silence in the house was as deafening as her outburst. She leaned against the kitchen sink with the towel pressed hard against her face and sobbed. Somewhere in the world there had to be a safe place she could curl up and die. There had to be.

  The kitchen door opened quietly, and she felt Harley snake an arm around her waist. She leaned into him with a shudder. “I’m sorry. I’m not mad at you. I shouldn’t have said those awful things. I’m sorry.”

  “No, you’re right. It’s okay,” he murmured. “You deserve better than Alex. You’re too good for him. Anyone can see that.”

  She dropped the towel into the sink and stared out the window. “I don’t have anything left to give.”