Molly had also popped in to see Judy several times, who was busy experimenting with different drinks for the tournament. As well as her usual variety of soft drinks, she had devised several golf-themed cocktails and Molly and Tom had spent a very pleasurable – and as it turned out, slightly tipsy – afternoon sampling some of her creations. One drink she had named The Links was made from whisky, honey, lemon and pink grapefruit, but Molly’s favourite had been The Tee-off consisting of Glenmorangie, Earl Grey tea, lemon and syrup.
On more than one occasion Molly had found Harry there enjoying a drink and, by the looks of it, Judy’s company. So it had come as no real surprise when Judy mentioned Harry would be helping her out on the day of the tournament, which Molly was thrilled about.
Molly had loved it all. Realising just how much she had picked up in the last year at the events company, she relished the opportunity to put some of her newly learnt skills to use.
Slowly she was beginning to feel her confidence grow and she found herself wondering how much of that was because of Tom. The way he listened and talked to her, the way he looked at her, it all made her feel different in some way, perhaps more like the person she used to be.
She sighed now, looking down. Her mind, like the page, was totally blank of ideas. And she knew the reason she was struggling to assemble her thoughts was because of Tom. He was there, colouring all her thinking with possibilities.
With his kiss replaying in her mind Molly was finding it difficult to think about anything else. She cautioned herself from reading too much into it. It had been a spur of the moment kiss, simply his way of saying goodnight.
So why then did she keep thinking of it in quite another way? A kiss capable of making her body tingle just thinking about it, a kiss she sensed could have easily turned into so much more.
She knew she shouldn’t let Tom alter her thinking; she had only known him a few weeks and it seemed slightly ridiculous to think he may be a factor in her future. But it was impossible to deny or ignore the intensity of her feelings for him.
She told herself to keep a clear head. She certainly couldn’t go rushing into anything else after just coming out of a failed marriage. Instinct told her Tom was a good man, and she would like nothing more than to have her trust restored in men, but the truth was she’d have trouble trusting anyone again. After Colin, she knew she needed to be sure. More than sure. She knew nothing in life came with a guarantee, that the foundations had to be stronger than what she had built her marriage with Colin on. She acknowledged now that she and Colin had married too quickly and if they had waited, time would have told them it was wrong. So she would never rush again – she couldn’t get it wrong a second time.
She felt as if something was growing between her and Tom and she found it shocking how much she was drawn to him. Was her body playing tricks on her – was she confusing her physical reaction for something more? But it was more than just the physical aspect. How could she be feeling like this so soon after meeting him and so soon after the end of her marriage? Was something happening between them and if so, wasn’t it happening too quickly? Yet even as the doubts mounted up in her mind, she knew just one look, one touch and they would all come tumbling down.
She looked up, hearing a noise, and saw Anna coming towards her clutching two glasses and a bottle of wine. Molly sat up as she approached, noticing she appeared different in some way, a lightness in her step.
‘Hello,’ Molly said. ‘You look happy.’
‘That’s because I’ve made a decision.’ She plonked herself down on a seat beside Molly.
‘Oh?’ Molly watched Anna rather ceremoniously pouring wine into the glasses before handing one to her.
‘I’m not taking the Forres job,’ she announced decisively.
‘Oh Anna, I think that’s the right decision.’ Molly felt relief flood through her, not realising until that moment how much she had been worrying about Anna. ‘I think that’s the right thing. At least till everything settles with the new house and the children at school.’
‘I can see that now. But it’s taken a bit of soul-searching.’
‘And what did you find?’ Molly asked with a small smile.
‘Stuart and I had a really good, long chat – in fact, it was the night you babysat. Do you remember?’
Molly nodded, recalling the evening after Anna’s migraine that she had finally persuaded them to go out, just the two of them.
‘It was a lovely evening – it’s been a long time since we’d talked properly. He told me he was worried about me, he thought the migraine might have been my body’s way of telling me to slow down. At first I was going to dismiss that as nonsense. But I started to think about the new job contract and deep down I knew my heart wasn’t in it. I was taking the job on automatic pilot. I began to realise that without my parents it didn’t feel as important anymore.’
‘That’s understandable,’ Molly commented. ‘You’re grieving and you need to give yourself time.’
‘But that’s the thing, all the time in the world won’t bring them back. I’m not sure I’ll ever feel the same. I was their only child and so much of what drove me to work and be successful was to make them proud.’
‘Which they were, incredibly so.’ Molly had met Anna’s parents several times, their love and joy for their daughter obvious for all to see.
Anna stared into the distance. ‘Where I grew up, no one was expected to go to university. The other kids thought I was weird because I actually listened in class and wanted to learn. So I learnt to hide it from them otherwise they would have made my life a misery. Of course, I was never in the popular group.’
She brought her gaze back to Molly. ‘There was this one girl who seemed to have an inexplicable power over everyone. The boys all fancied her, the girls all wanted to be like her – me included. I got it into my head if I could have a party and invite them all they’d finally accept me. I begged my parents to allow me to have a fifteenth birthday party and of course they agreed. They put up balloons and made food…I was so excited.’ She paused. ‘And everyone turned up and basically trashed the place. Someone spilt drink all over the sofa…it was awful. But my parents never got angry and I felt so guilty.’ Her voice cracked at the memory.
‘Oh, Anna.’ Molly leaned forward and squeezed her hand.
‘After that, I stopped trying to be like one of them. All I wanted was do well and make my parents proud. Now they’re not here…well, it doesn’t seem as important anymore. Being here…’ She waved her hand vaguely encompassing the garden. ‘It’s given me a new perspective. And I’m ready to do something a bit different.’
Molly saw a glimmer of excitement in Anna’s eyes. ‘So what are you going to do?’ she asked her.
‘Well, I thought I would run the two downstairs bedrooms in the new house as a bed and breakfast – at least during the summer.’ She clasped her hands together, waiting for Molly’s reaction.
‘Wow, I didn’t expect that, but I think it’s a fantastic idea!’
‘You do – honestly?’
‘Definitely.’ Molly grinned. ‘The setting here is perfect and you’ll have more time to be with the children.’
‘That’s what I thought. And I can still take some freelance work in the winter if I want. But I’m really excited about the bed and breakfast. I discussed it with Eva to get an idea of what it would really be like. She’s offered to help if she can – she’s already given me loads of useful information.’
‘That all sounds wonderful.’ Molly beamed. ‘I’m so happy for you.’
‘And you being here has helped so much, Molly.’
‘What, seeing the mess of my life has helped you?’ she joked.
‘Don’t be daft. You gave us time and having you around has been so lovely. And you know you can come and stay anytime.’
‘And I appreciate that so much.’ Molly sipped her wine and looked down at the notepad in her lap. Her heart felt lifted for Anna and she hoped now it was her turn
to move forward, to find happiness. Was it possible that Tom had awakened something in her – something she’d never felt before, even in her marriage? It was both exhilarating and uncomfortable to acknowledge she hadn’t felt like this before. On one level it all seemed confusing and complicated and on the other level achingly simple. What if this was it? What if she’d found someone who she could love and be loved in return? She knew Colin had never made her heart thunder in her chest the way it did with Tom and she had to know if he felt the same. Anything was possible, you just had to be brave enough to try.
****
A few hours later Molly studied her reflection in the mirror. She blinked a few times, her eyes unaccustomed to the lashings of mascara she had coated on her lashes. She had smoothed a layer of subtle foundation to give her skin an extra glow and finished with a touch of lip gloss.
She slipped on a pale pink summer dress, liking its silky feel against her skin and then edged her feet into espadrille wedged sandals. Finally, she clipped a silver necklace around her neck which nestled prettily against her sun-kissed skin.
She declined Stuart and Anna’s offer to join them and the children for a pizza, telling them she was taking a leisurely walk to the golf school to check a few final details for tomorrow.
There was a tangible buzz around the town with hundreds of spectators having arrived for the tournament and Molly walked slowly, weaving her way through the crowds, taking her time. She wanted to arrive cool and composed. Not that she had planned what she was going to say to Tom, but she knew it suddenly felt imperative to see him. She might not get an opportunity at the tournament and then the next day she was going to Glasgow.
She felt a quiver of excitement run through her at the thought of seeing him and was almost skipping by the time she approached the school. Her body slumped with disappointment when Kenny told her Tom had already left. Molly hadn’t realised it was so late – she’d obviously walked a lot slower than she thought. She stayed chatting to Kenny who was waiting for the last couple of players to finish on the course before locking up and then said she’d see him tomorrow.
Molly smiled to herself, Tom probably wanted an early night before tomorrow. Feeling brave, she thought she might as well see if she could catch him at his hotel. By the time she reached the main street, the town was still busy, a distinct buzz about the place. No one appeared to be in hurry, they were all meandering along at a snail’s pace, stopping to look in windows and enjoy the sunshine. Molly had to dodge her way round people, feeling suddenly impatient. She passed the little restaurant that Tom had taken her to, the intimacy of that night flickering pleasurably in her mind.
She froze.
Tom was standing at the entrance of his hotel with a woman. She was slim with a curtain of blonde hair falling over her face. The woman moved in closer to him and Tom wrapped his arms around her in an embrace so tender and gentle that Molly gasped out loud. She wanted to tear her eyes away but was rooted to the spot, unable to move. They pulled apart now and Tom said something, gesturing with his hand for her to go through the door of the hotel before him.
With the most horrible sinking realisation, Molly knew it was Tom’s ex. She must be in town with the tournament and have decided to contact him – catch up on old times maybe. Perhaps they realised they still had feelings for each other. The thought that he might be having an early night for quite a different reason made her feel sick.
They had history together so it was understandable if they had decided to rekindle what they had. But what had really hurt the most was seeing the tenderness he so obviously still had for her. The way he had held her seemed to speak a thousand words. The Tom that Molly had got to know – handsome, sexy and caring – wasn’t hers, as much as she now knew she wanted him to be.
Molly blinked. Suddenly it was Colin she saw – Colin with another woman. It couldn’t be happening again. How could she be so stupid? She had wondered over the past few weeks if she was imagining something between her and Tom, if it was real. At least now she knew – it wasn’t real, at least not for him. He had been nice to her and she had mistaken it for something more. They had shared moments of closeness and she had sensed the promise of so much more to come between them. She thought they had grown close, she thought she knew him, but clearly she didn’t know him at all. After the end of her marriage it hadn’t been easy for her but she had started to trust Tom, to open up to him. With a sinking feeling she realised she had got it very wrong.
She had the worst judgement in the world. She knew she had fallen for him completely and only now she knew it wasn’t going to happen did she feel the full force of her devastation.
She didn’t think it was possible for matters to be made worse, but to her horror Tom glanced over. Had he seen her? She felt horribly exposed. Quickly she turned, every fibre of her being screaming at her to move. Summoning all her dignity she turned and started to walk, her eyes suddenly blinded by tears. Concentrating on putting one foot in front of the other, she was barely aware of her surroundings as she returned to the guest house.
With shaky fingers she found her keys at the bottom of her bag, almost sagging with relief that no one was home yet and ran up to her lovely, safe room. Never had she been so grateful to shut a door behind her.
She kicked off her sandals and whipped off her dress, flinging it into a crumpled heap on the floor. The make-up that had taken so long to apply was now scrubbed off in seconds. Moments later she stood under a scalding shower and let the tears flow.
Chapter Fourteen
Molly squared her shoulders and plastered on a smile, ready for the day ahead.
She’d arrived early at the golf school this morning, armed with coffee and doughnuts for everyone, which had gone down well, especially with Kenny and a couple of his friends who were helping out. Her heart had skipped a beat when she’d seen Tom. Wearing blue chinos and a white polo shirt, he looked every inch the golf professional. She tried to fight it but her body betrayed her, responding to him immediately. Somehow she had managed to keep her distance from him, making sure she was busy elsewhere and turning the other way when she felt his gaze on her.
Last night she had finally gone to bed feeling hollowed out and empty. She had tossed and turned for hours, the image of Tom with his arms around the woman playing over and over again in her mind until finally she had fallen asleep hugging her pillow.
Now she was determined not to shed any more tears. The fantasy was over and she had to deal with reality. She would face her future alone. And why shouldn’t she? She was fed up of being scared and unsure. She felt a little surge of independence. She didn’t need a man to prop her up or to make her complete. She could do this alone. She just had to get through the tournament today and then tomorrow she would be back in Glasgow.
Taking a deep breath, she looked up at the sky. She had checked the weather forecast countless times over the past few days and only now that she could see the sun shining in a cloudless blue sky with her own eyes did she finally believe it. That was at least one less thing to worry about. Everything was ready and in place for the tournament. It wasn’t going to be the day she thought it might have been but she did manage to feel a little rush of excitement thinking about all the children arriving soon.
She had hung some bunting and pinned a few balloons about the place to add a sense of fun and occasion and she had arranged for Kenny and his friends to go and collect a couple of tables from the inn where she set up bottles of water for the children to help themselves.
Kenny was now stationed at the desk in reception ready to tick off the names as the children registered and then Joe was going to break the ice with a brief chat. The children were going to be heading out to play in groups of two or four, leaving at ten-minute intervals, and parents and spectators could follow their offspring round the course if they wished. And of course, they could also go and have a drink at the inn. Lily had made some lovely signs on blue card with gold lettering, directing people through the path t
owards the inn.
Because players had to be aged at least eight, Molly had devised a few games and activities for their younger siblings. She had sourced some fun emoji golf balls showing happy, laughing or angry faces and some plastic clubs and balls and set aside an area for them on the grass in front of the school.
Molly felt the lightest touch on the small of her back and knew by the small shockwave that shot through her that it was Tom. She turned towards him, trying not to meet his eye. She could feel him studying her.
‘Is everything all right, Molly?’
‘Of course,’ she replied over-brightly. ‘Just keeping my fingers crossed it all goes smoothly.’
‘I’m sure it will, thanks to you.’
She waved her hand dismissively.
‘You look lovely,’ he said.
She had dressed carefully today, selecting a green ruffle dress which she knew suited her auburn hair and accentuated her hazel eyes. On the inside she might be a mess but outwardly at least she’d wanted to look her very best.
‘You got my text last night?’ He frowned.
Not only had she received it, she had stared at his words – asking if they could meet – for a long time wondering how to reply. He knew she had seen him at the hotel so he probably wanted to tell her that he was getting back together with Jen. She didn’t really need to hear it. She’d seen enough with her own eyes.
‘Sorry I didn’t have time to reply – you know, what with my parents arriving and everything.’
‘Can we speak later—’
‘Oh, look! The first people are arriving,’ Molly interrupted, practically launching herself at the little group who were making their way over. She turned briefly to Tom and said, ‘Good luck with everything,’ before moving away.
Summer at West Sands Guest House Page 13