He gently took the case from her hands, their fingers brushed momentarily and Katey bit her lips together nervously.
Logan popped the DVD into the player on top of the TV and took his place on the couch. Katey shyly walked to the kitchen and sat on one of the bar stools, unsure if it would be too forward of her to take a place in one of the recliners.
She wondered if this movie upset them. They lived through the Titanic. Wouldn’t the movie upset them when they were reminded of the events from that night? It must have been a traumatic experience.
Katey leaned her forearms on the counter and watched their reactions.
Darren and Dustin began talking in their foreign language again as Logan navigated through the main menu of the DVD. He seemed so at peace, like nothing in the world was wrong. She was sure that if she weren’t present, Darren would have laid into him about imprinting without their permission.
Just as he was about to hit the play button, Katey was startled to hear Ben come through the front door. She didn’t expect to see him back so soon as he strode into the living room carrying the bags of takeout boxes.
“What are we watching?” he asked, making his way straight for the breakfast bar where Katey sat. He set the food down in front of her and began pulling out container after container. It all smelt amazing.
“Titanic,” Darren replied cheerfully, leaning his chin in his hand.
“I still envy you guys that you were passengers on that ship.”
“What was there to envy? That night was madness! If a close call from Logan wasn’t enough, it was the chaos of trying to find everyone before the ship foundered. I still can’t believe we managed it!” Dustin exclaimed, a hint of his accent slipping through.
“Just the luxury of it. It would have been nice.”
“You would have gone mad with the tight spaces though,” Logan commented.
Ben shrugged. “True. Do you guys ever think about those girls?”
Katey’s interest and jealousy flared. “What girls?”
Nobody seemed to notice her question, although the three of them exchanged knowing glances.
Myer pulled out a carton with the hastily scribbled words “low mien” on the side. He wrinkled his nose in confusion. “Who got the low mien?” he asked.
Katey smiled and snagged the box and pair of chopsticks from his hands. He chuckled a bit, and then carried the rest of the food into the living room to distribute to the guys.
She decided to help and grabbed five water bottles out of the refrigerator. She then distributed one to each of them and left one for herself at the counter. Ben was puzzled as he took his from her, as if he was unaccustomed to being waited on by someone else.
Darren and Dustin thanked her with pleasant smiles. Logan took his, but gave her no words or glances of appreciation. It bothered her a little more than it probably should have.
Katey perched herself back up onto the barstool and watched the beginnings of the movie when the old Rose is welcomed onto the research vessel.
Darren stood up and turned off the lights in both the living room and the kitchen, leaving the whole house dark except for the waning light coming from outside and the glow of the TV. Katey couldn’t even see the takeout carton in front of her that well.
She hungrily shoveled noodles into her mouth as the teachers and Logan all ate from their boxes either set in their laps or on their stomachs. This might have been the biggest meal Katey had eaten in a while.
Her stomach became bloated to the point of discomfort before she was even half way through the carton. It made her wonder if what Logan had said that morning had some credibility. He mentioned that she hardly ate anything at all and that’s why she was so skinny.
Katey was tempted to think that she might be anorexic on some level, just as her friends had accused her of being. But she pushed the thought away before it made her feel awful about herself. She didn’t want to admit to having some kind of eating disorder. That was then, and this was now.
As the movie rolled on, Katey could just picture the teachers and Logan all dressed in third-class garments, walking about the boat deck or in their cabins. As the movie progressed, she could hear Dustin, Darren, and Logan talk amongst themselves about little things in the movie.
Things like “I don’t think the railings were up that high. Do you remember, Logan?” and “That dining hall was much bigger. Don’t you agree, Dustin?” and “The exercise room was smaller than that.”
She also heard talk about their mysterious girls and experiences on the ship. Through it all, however, the guys never talked about their time on the ship as anything totally horrible or traumatic. They seemed rather lighthearted about the whole thing. To anyone else, it might have been surprising. But knowing that they were practically indestructible, the tragedy of the Titanic must have merely been an inconvenience to them, instead of the life-altering disaster that it had been for everyone else that night.
Talking during a movie normally bothered her, but she was more interested in what they were talking about than the actual movie.
When the time came to change the DVDs out, Katey looked over at their boxes and they were all empty and none of them looked stuffed. They must have not had leftovers very often. Katey took the break as a chance to fold up her carton and put it safely in the fridge for later. She tried to ignore all of the containers of raw meat that were stacked and crammed on all of the shelves. It reminded her of a mini meat-locker at a butcher or deli.
Katey sighed and walked back to her barstool as she felt the beginnings of drowsiness pull at her body and the couches began to look even more comfortable and inviting. Maybe Darren would buy a plush chair for her later, if she stayed long enough.
Katey glanced over at Logan spread across the length of his sofa and saw that one of his feet were propped up on the leg of the couch closest to the TV and the other was set firmly on the floor, leaving a space on the couch just wide enough for her to slide in. Question was, would Katey take the risk?
Just as Rose was spitting in Cal’s eye in the movie and running off to find Jack, Katey summoned all of her courage and walked into the living room, right over to Logan, keeping her eye on the spot she was heading for and sat down without invitation. Katey continued to watch the movie as casually as she could, even though her heart was pounding.
She leaned back so that Logan could see the screen and her lower back gently pressed against his calf so she slid down a little to avoid touching him. Logan didn’t seem bothered by her being there but soon, she felt her eyelids droop with sleep. Katey took deep breaths and tried to make her eyes stay open, but it was no use. The effects of a full stomach were weighing on her.
All the guys in the room could tell Katey was tired as her head began to nod a bit.
Logan was trying his best to keep his attention focused on the movie, but having Katey so close to him was distracting. All he could think of doing was grabbing her and holding her close.
Dustin decidedly stood up and collected the empty take out boxes from everyone, including Logan. He took Logan’s container and nudged his head suggestively towards Katey. Logan sneered at him, but it didn’t faze Dustin as he walked into the kitchen to throw away the trash.
“I’m going to bed. See ya’ll in the morning,” Ben said with a yawn, and then walked upstairs. Katey leaned her head against the back of the couch and watched him leave the room, but didn’t think anything of it.
Dustin returned to the sofa and a moment later tapped Darren’s arm with the back of his hand to get his attention. Dustin motioned to the two on the other couch, then to themselves, then the stairs.
Darren eyed Dustin questionably. He understood what he was driving at, but didn’t understand why. The alpha shook his head and the beta rolled his eyes.
“I’m beat. Going to bed,” Dustin said, stretching his arms over his head.
Logan and Katey only glanced at him before turning back to the movie. He stood up and started to make his way
to the stairs, then turned around to Darren. “Come on, Darren,” he insisted.
“But, the movie isn’t over yet,” Darren stated blandly.
“Don’t you think it’s getting a little late though?”
“No, not at all.” Darren shot him a look of impatience, but Dustin ignored it. Logan didn’t look to the two, but raised his eyebrows at the conversation.
“Don’t you have a class to teach in the morning?” Dustin asked.
“Dustin, it’s semester exam week and I have a planning period first thing in the morning. I don’t even have a class.”
“Well, come upstairs with me, I want you to check something out.”
“Dustin, I want to watch the rest of the movie.”
Katey was startled as Darren’s voice suddenly dropped low and aggressive. She shot a glance at him and saw his eyes were glowing their loup-garou gold. She bit her nails nervously, hoping a fight wouldn’t break out. She found comfort in Logan’s composure and turned back to the movie.
Dustin was not in the mood for Darren to be so stubborn. He knew that he was overstepping his bounds a bit, but he was just as determined. “You’ve seen it and lived it, why watch it?”
Darren sighed and gritted his teeth. He looked to Logan and Katey. He didn’t want to leave them so unattended after Logan had tried to imprint on her. Imprinting almost always led to changing and they weren’t ready for that yet. None of them were. He had caught the imprinting just in time, but would he catch a bite in time?
“Fine!” he barked, exploding from his chair and followed Dustin up the stairs.
When they were at the top of the stairs, Darren grabbed Dustin by his lapel and pinned him to the wall of the stairwell. “Why?” he whispered harshly.
It wasn’t often that the alpha would raise a hand against his pack, but then again, it wasn’t often for Dustin - or any of them for that matter - to step so far out of line that Darren had to use a show of force. Dustin was normally not this pushy and obstinate.
“I just wanted to give Katey and Logan a moment,” Dustin whispered back, low and soft enough that it was unlikely Logan would hear over the noise of the movie. “I don’t intend to go upstairs, just stay on the stairs and listen.”
Darren let go and exhaled sharply. His eyes darkened back to their normal brown and he nodded. Dustin rubbed his sore shoulder and lowered himself onto the stairs. Darren did the same.
Chapter 26
In the movie, Rose had just been forced to go into one of the life boats, leaving Jack behind. Katey looked over at Logan, whose eyes reflected the flickering TV screen.
“Are you tired too?” he asked. He knew the answer, though.
Katey drearily nodded and turned back to the TV.
Logan took a deep breath, put one arm up on the back of the couch and with the other, he took Katey by the hand and pulled her down gently to his chest. She was baffled by his bold move, but didn’t recoil from him.
She laid half on her stomach and half on her left side, her head resting on his chest, watching the movie. And for some reason, this felt just right. It made her feel more at home, more comfortable.
Katey let her right arm slide in behind his back and the other rested on the other side of his muscled chest, her fingers spread out over his shirt. At first, his arms didn’t get even close to touching her, but after a while, the arm that hung on the back of the couch wrapped around her shoulder blades and his hand joined hers on his chest. She could feel and hear his heart thumping heavily. At least she wasn’t the only one a little nervous.
She sleepily watched the scene where Jack and Rose tried to stay on the Titanic as long as possible until it sank completely and she let her eyes drift shut. Soon, Katey could feel Logan stroking her hair and twirling it between his fingers. She nuzzled her head against his chest and sighed contently, not completely asleep, but almost.
Logan wasn’t even paying attention to the ending as he gazed down longingly at Katey, his eyes misty. His caresses were soft and soothing. His aim was to lull her to sleep and ease her thundering heart. He listened to some of old Rose’s last lines in the movie about how Jack saved her in every way a person can be saved. He wanted to be that for Katey, his heart ached for it. His thumb petted the back of her hand, feeling her blood pulse beneath her skin.
Before Katey knew it, silence fell across the room and the movie was over. Logan turned off the television so the music montage played over the DVD menu wouldn’t disturb her. Katey was just on the verge of dozing into dreamland when Logan finally spoke.
“You know,” he began in a tender whisper, “the first time I saw you in that cemetery on your birthday, I didn’t know what to think. I half thought you were an angel to keep me company that night. It turned out to be the best day of my life. I never expected that all of this would happen.
“I knew after that night, I wanted to find out everything I could about you. I followed your scent all over town to try and find you the day after. When I finally found you at the bookstore, it took all my self-control to not sweep you up in my arms and steal you away from there so I could have you all to myself.” Logan had to laugh a little at the foolishness of the idea.
“I enrolled into the high school just to be closer to you. I’ve never felt this way about anyone. When I’m with you, I feel normal. I forget what I am and I feel almost human, like you. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I don’t know what I would do without you around. I would lose a part of myself… Maybe all of myself….” Logan’s voice trailed off at the very thought.
“I’d do anything to keep you with me. I believe I’d die for you if you asked me to. I want to be with you every day for the rest of my life, whether that be tomorrow or a hundred thousand years from now.” Logan lightly pressed her hand tighter to his chest.
“I’ve seen what you’ve been through and I want to make it all up to you somehow. I want to give you everything, be your everything… You’re just so perfect in my eyes. You’re funny, smart, kind, and whether you admit it or not, you’re more beautiful than anything I’ve ever seen. It’s like I’ve lived so long without air and when I look at you, my lungs are filled for the first time. It’s like my whole world is in color, just knowing that you live in it.
“I never knew what love really was until I met you. I’d be a fool to break your heart or hurt you. I can only promise that I’d never do anything to hurt you. If I did, I wouldn’t know how to live with myself. I probably wouldn’t. I’d just take a silver bullet to my head and end it all…” Logan gritted his teeth and tensed his jaw as if he was ready to take that bullet right at that very moment.
“You’re always in my thoughts, in my dreams. You’ve consumed every part of me and you don’t even know it…” Logan shook his head at the pity that she didn’t know. “You’re everything I’ve been waiting for, but there’s no way for us to be together like the way that I’d want.”
He paused, his eyes about to brim with tears. One escaped him and rolled down his cheek. They were tears he had been holding in for so long and he couldn’t hold them in any longer. He took a silent stuttered breath before continuing with as much composure as he could muster.
“Even if we were together, you would grow old and die long before I ever would. But who would want to be with me anyway? I’m just a kid’s worst nightmare and you deserve a knight in shining armor… If there were a way to reverse this curse, I’d do it in a heartbeat just so I could have the chance to be with you… The only other way is for you to become a monster like me,” Logan paused, feeling his heart break all over again, “but I could never force that upon you. I’m ashamed of myself for even bringing it up in the first place. I was desperate… I’m still desperate.”
Logan turned his eyes to the ceiling and took another deep breath to calm himself. It felt good to finally say how he felt, but it did nothing to ease the pain inside. He loved her so completely with reckless abandon that it hurt. He cherished these moments spent with her in his arm
s. He never wanted to let go, but he knew that he had to end, if not that night, then a million nights from now, it would. He couldn’t stand the thought.
In the stairwell, Darren and Dustin looked to each other, both touched and concerned by Logan’s words. They knew in that moment that their boy was truly growing up. It scared them, but at least he finally knew what love was. They knew that the love of a wolf was true, undying, but also unstoppable.
***
The next morning, Katey was back in her bed, snuggled under the covers. Her cell phone alarm buzzed and she groggily reached out to shut it off. She tried to recap her memory of the night before in the living room. Katey had heard everything Logan said and hoped it wasn’t just a dream. She was so out of it that she didn’t know whether it was real or something she had just imagined. Heaven knows she wanted it to be real, to know that Logan loved her just as she loved him, maybe even more. Yet, the talk about monsters and eternity alone scared her into thinking it might not have been real. It didn’t quite sound like something Logan would say. Than again, there were many things about him that she still didn’t understand.
She pushed herself up, letting the covers slide away from her as she looked around her room.
Her journalism and internship semester exams were this morning and both exams were technically done so there might not have been any reason to go to school. On top of that, Logan didn’t have any classes today either and what fun was school without Logan there anymore?
After about twenty minutes of snoozing, She heard the teachers walk down the hall to their bedrooms to get ready. Katey burst up from under the covers, afraid that she might be late and ran to the bathroom once she heard all three doors shut.
As she hurried down the hall, Katey glanced to Logan’s door. It remained shut, as did the other teachers’ doors, but she wondered if he might have still been downstairs.
She swiftly ducked into the bathroom and primped for the day. She washed her face, but feeling brave, she didn’t put on any makeup. If Logan saw it, she feared he would get angry and try to scrub it all off again like he had the morning before. Katey leaned forward and examined her complexion in the mirror with a tiny smile. Not one blemish or whitehead.
The Enigma (The Loup-Garou Series Book 1) Page 33