It didn’t matter that, at the time, Art hadn’t even had a boyfriend, much less a love of his life. Still didn’t, but Cole’s aunt was a “be prepared” kind of person and wanted to make sure she still got to help put together a lavish wedding for her only child.
We are a pitifully boring family. Although considering the potential alternatives, he knew he was damned lucky.
He’d even admitted that one-off, sexy college experience to Kim. A long time ago, in fact. They’d been talking about their experiences and fantasies and he hadn’t wanted any secrets like that between them to come out later and freak her out. He also hadn’t felt right keeping it a secret. Knowing her history, he’d wanted them to have fully open lines of communication, where she’d feel completely safe talking to him about any- and everything.
Yes, in retrospect this new development absolutely shouldn’t come as a shock to him. Kim had divorced an idiot two years before they’d met, a guy whose idea of kinky was taking his socks off before sex.
Not only had Kim’s interests been far wilder than her ex’s, but her libido had, too. Cole had no complaints about their sex life whatsoever.
Uncharacteristically, Kim had blushed and fumbled when she tried to explain this all to Cole the other day. She’d finally ended with, “I just want to talk to other people face to face, who do this in real-life, and get some perspective and information about it.”
Sure he’d agreed to it. Her ex had shut her down at every turn and taken any special requests on her part as an insult to his manhood.
A long time ago, Cole had decided he wouldn’t be like that with her. That if they ever reached a point where their interests didn’t match up any more, they could part as friends, but he wouldn’t stifle her personality. He wouldn’t try to make her conform to just make himself comfortable.
Besides, this was just dinner. Dinner at a decent steakhouse where he knew he’d get a prime rib that would be absolutely delicious, based on past dining experiences there. If it meant talking to people and allowing Kim to express herself and explore, fine. Maybe she’d talk to people tonight and that’d be the end of it.
If not…well, he wasn’t a worrier. He’d deal with anything else if or when it came.
* * * *
Kim was ready to go when Cole arrived. She lived about twenty minutes away from him, in south Sarasota. Not the best apartment complex in the world, but at least it wasn’t in a high-crime area.
When he’d dropped a hint months earlier that he wouldn’t be against having discussions about her eventually moving into his house with him, she’d deftly and gently dodged the matter in such a way that he knew not to bring it up again. If or when she wanted to, she would.
Her marriage and divorce had stolen most of her self-esteem, her confidence. She’d married Craige at nineteen, right out of high school. He’d gone to college and she’d put off her own education to help get him through school at Craige’s insistence. Then when it came time for her to go, he announced the money wasn’t there.
Despite the fact that his parents had paid the man’s way through school, and they had plenty in savings. Or she could have taken out student loans…except he refused to let her do that.
Craige had also wanted her to have kids, which she’d told him from the start she wasn’t even sure she wanted.
They’d struggled along for almost twelve years before Kim finally had enough. She divorced Craige after one too many arguments where he’d rubbed it in her face that he made more money than her, and that if she didn’t like the way he did things, there was the door, and to not let it hit her in the ass.
Unfortunately, she’d lost the house and a lot of stuff in the process, but she was free and now being paid alimony that would continue for another three years. Not enough in total to pay for a four-year college education, but she was putting it into savings and starting to take online classes.
Cole wasn’t sure if Kim would ever be able to fully repair the rift in her relationship with her parents and two older sisters, a rift largely caused by her relationship with Craige. Cole had met them before, last Christmas, and they seemed like nice people, if a little standoffish with Kim.
He’d also seen his lively, vibrant girlfriend fold up on herself like an old rag, holding herself back, being quiet, a side of her personality he hadn’t witnessed in her before.
More leftover carnage courtesy of Craige, Cole was sure, but they hadn’t really talked much about that day since.
Not for lack of trying on his part.
He parked next to her car and walked around to her apartment. On the first floor, but on the far side of the building, at least her corner unit had a great view of a nearby pond. She greeted him at the door with a kiss, her brown eyes sparkling, her long reddish-brown hair down and loose around her shoulders.
“I’m ready.” She squeezed his hands. “Thank you again for this.” Kim wore a pair of jeans, a dressy blouse he loved seeing her in, and a pair of short boots with chunky heels that raised her five-five frame an additional three inches. At six one, it wasn’t like he minded if she wore heels.
“I’m paying for dinner tonight,” he said. “No arguing. Got it?”
She blushed, again not a normal activity for her. “Thank you.”
He had a decent job at a home health care company. He’d started working there while in college, a part-time clerk in their billing department. Now he was a regional manager of operations in charge of four counties. He owned his own house, and he could afford to pay for their dinners. Plenty of times she would argue with him and fight him when he offered to pay for things, wanting to pay her own way.
He understood why, how she was still in many ways coping from what she’d been through. Against the erroneous image she had of herself, courtesy of Craige and his asshole family.
Tonight, however, he would take a stand.
Hell, she wanted to give BDSM a try? Then he could put his foot down and be in charge like this, at least.
Even if it might be all he could make himself do.
Chapter Four
Kim York felt a mix of fear and excitement rushing through her as they got into Cole’s car and headed for the restaurant. She didn’t think she had the words to tell Cole how much she loved him for doing this for her. Even if nothing came of it, it meant a lot to her that he was willing to try, to step outside his comfort zone.
Because he loved her.
Just like he hadn’t brought up moving in together again. He’d left it an open-ended topic, one she knew he wouldn’t venture into unless she mentioned it first.
Another reason to love him. Almost enough to make her want to start talking about it again.
I really need to quit being a chickenshit.
She also loved that Cole had taken the initiative and insisted on paying tonight, even though she’d been the one who’d asked to go to this. Tonight she wouldn’t argue with him. It was too close to the end of the fiscal month for her, and she was running dangerously low on cash for expenses. The absolute last thing she wanted to do was dip into her savings, use her alimony for something like this.
One more reason to love Cole.
But she’d thought she’d been in love with Craige, too.
Scratch that. She had been in love with Craige. What she’d also been, however, was too damn young and naive to get married. Which everyone had warned her about, but she’d ignored, thinking she knew better.
Her parents and two older sisters had warned her and pretty much done everything but disown her over it. She was still rebuilding that strained relationship with them. Hard to do when they lived in Orlando and she lived in Sarasota, but this was where Craige had wanted to move to after college, where he’d gotten a job.
Where what few friends she’d had left after the divorce were located.
She reached across the seat and laced fingers with Cole. “I love you.” She had to force herself to speak up over the radio, even though it wasn’t turned up loud.
He
gently squeezed her hand. “Love you, too.”
“I mean it. If this is too weird, or if you hate it, or—”
“Honey, it’s okay. I’m keeping an open mind. I already told you that.”
“But I—”
“This is just dinner and talking to people.” He gently squeezed her hand again. “I’m not Craige,” he softly said, silencing her.
This was a conversation they’d had with embarrassing frequency.
She nodded. “I know. I just want you to know I really appreciate this.”
“I know you do.”
They rode for a few more moments in a comfortable silence, other than the radio. “I’m sorry.”
He glanced over at her but didn’t reply.
Another frequent conversation.
Somehow, even though Craige hadn’t been physically “abusive,” per se, she’d left their marriage feeling like little more than poor white trash. He’d come from money and his family had rarely missed an opportunity during family gatherings to subtly remind her of the fact that she’d come from hardworking, middle-class parents, or the fact that she hadn’t attended college.
Didn’t matter to them that the last point was Craige’s fault.
For years she’d struggled as she thought she had to straddle some invisible line. For years she’d also worked to mold herself into the “perfect” spouse until the realization had hit her one day that no matter what she did, she’d never be perfect in the eyes of Craige or his stuck-up family.
Thus she’d decided to quit trying.
Hence followed the rapid implosion of the fantasy that had never existed in the first place.
To this day, even though she knew it was a construct in her own mind and not the perception of others, she struggled against the feeling that she maybe wasn’t as good as other people. That maybe Craige and his family were right in their assessment of her.
Cole had been more than patient with her on that point, lovingly scolding her about it when he caught her doing it. Cole’s family had never made her feel anything but at ease when she was among them.
Maybe one day I’ll get my act together.
How could she move in with him and plan to spend the rest of her life with him when she still felt like she was a few embers away from being a Dumpster fire in terms of her emotional development?
It wouldn’t be fair to him. Although he’d been exceptionally patient with her in the time they’d been together.
Far more patient than Craige had ever tried to be with her.
When they pulled into the restaurant’s parking lot, Kim was shocked to see so many cars there on a Sunday evening. She knew the Suncoast Society munch group was meeting in a private banquet room in the back, and to ask the hostess for the “computer group.”
But she hadn’t honestly thought there’d be a lot of people here.
Maybe most of the cars are people here to eat and not part of the group.
“What if we know someone in there?” she asked.
Ever calm, her bastion of sensibility, Cole shrugged. “So?”
“It won’t…embarrass you if we do?” Not to mention she’d feel guilty as hell about it.
“Well, if they’re there, then I guess they’re there for the same reason we’re there, right?”
“Oh. True.” She was lucky that she had a fairly anonymous job. She worked the main desk as the receptionist and administrative assistant at an insurance agency down in Venice. Her boss, Emery Nadel, was an easygoing guy. He’d just married his husband, Sean, now that gay marriage had become legal. They had three adopted kids, two of them twins who’d been Emery’s younger sister’s children. She and her husband were brutally murdered when the twins were just a couple of months old.
Although Kim wasn’t sure if gay would automatically translate into “okay with kinky shit” if this ever got out. Hopefully it wouldn’t be a problem.
She definitely didn’t want to do anything to screw up Cole’s job.
Wait. I’m worrying over nothing.
This was just dinner. The website assured people that it was a safe way to meet others and get information.
Wasn’t like they were actually going to a dungeon or anything, although she had visited the website for Venture, a local private BDSM club.
She wasn’t sure she was quite ready for that step yet.
She wasn’t even sure she was ready for this step.
All she knew was that it had taken her a while to reconcile the fact that what she wanted with Cole was far different than what she’d had with Craige. The kind of domination Craige had basically engaged in throughout their entire relationship wasn’t the healthy kind, even if, technically, she had gone along with it and he hadn’t, technically, been abusive.
Just an asshole.
Hailing from a family of assholes, but they’d cloaked their assholery in a disguise of money and prestige and she’d fallen for their silent bullshit narrative that she wasn’t as good as them from the start.
A mistake she’d never make again, although not a mistake she ever expected to make with Cole. He was the polar opposite of her ex in all ways. While it wasn’t that she had complaints about her relationship with Cole—because she didn’t—she did wish there was a little bit of an…edge to it on occasion.
Maybe that wasn’t even the right word, but that was the whole point, that she was so new to this world she wasn’t even sure how to speak the language yet. Kim knew romance novels couldn’t be guidebooks, either. Looking for stuff on the Internet meant she had a hard time sorting the wheat from the…well, porn. Maybe her Google-Fu skills just weren’t good enough. She had given up trying to find information about BDSM in general and knew her best bet was to come talk to people actually involved in this.
Cole ended up leading the way and speaking with the hostess, who directed them back to a private room. Inside, there were over a dozen round tables that sat anywhere from eight to twelve people apiece. It took Kim a second to take in how absolutely normal and…boring everyone looked. The median age appeared to be middle-aged, with extremes at both ends, from a couple of women who barely looked legal, to an apparently married couple who might very well be octogenarians.
Okay, then.
A woman offered them a friendly smile as she walked up to them. “Hi, my name’s Shayla. You both have that ‘what am I doing here’ look.” She wore a leather collar around her neck. At least, Kim assumed it was a collar.
Cole laughed and took over the interaction, much to Kim’s relief. “You sound like you know what to look for.”
Shayla shook hands with them. “I sure do.” She turned and pointed to a man, who was talking to another couple. “That’s my husband and Master, Tony. We’re the hosts of the group tonight.”
“I’m Cole, this is my girlfriend, Kim. And yes, we’re both new. This is our first event. Ever.”
“Excellent. Are you meeting anyone here in particular tonight, or would you like me to introduce you around and help you find a place to sit?”
“Introductions would be greatly appreciated, thanks,” Cole said.
Kim’s nerves tightened in her gut as she held Cole’s hand while they followed Shayla around the room. She knew she’d never remember all the people’s names, but everyone seemed very nice. They ended up at a table in a far corner of the room where only one guy was currently sitting.
“Mason, do you mind if I seat Kim and Cole with you? This is their very first time to an event, and they’re completely new to the lifestyle.”
“Not a problem.” The normal-looking man, wearing khakis and a button-up shirt, stood and indicated two chairs next to him that were leaning against the table. “Seth and Leah asked me to save them two seats here, but the rest are free.”
“Wonderful,” Shayla said. “Mason’s one of our old-timers, but he’s been living out of town for several years and just moved back a couple of months ago. This is his first munch with us in quite a while, so he’s almost like a newbie.” Another couple
entered the room. “Aaaand if you’ll please excuse me, I think I see another new couple I need to go greet.”
Kim focused on the guy. Hazel eyes, brown hair, clean-shaven. Dressed like he worked in an office.
Average. Nice-looking guy.
Cole stuck out his hand. “Cole.”
They shook. “Nice to meet you. Mason.”
“And this is my girlfriend, Kim.”
Mason hesitated before extending his hand. “May I?” he asked Cole.
Cole frowned. “Huh?”
Mason smiled. “It’s always considered polite protocol for a Dominant to ask permission before shaking hands with another Dominant’s submissive.”
“Oh, um, yeah. Sure. No problem.”
Now Kim had one question answered and didn’t know if the little thrill that raced through her as she shook with the man was from knowing he was a Dominant, or that Cole was automatically seen as being in charge of her.
One thing she had read that resonated with her was that the brain was the biggest sex organ in the body. That sometimes it was as much about how you psyched yourself up for something as it was the actual things you did.
Maybe that was true.
One way or another, she suspected she was about to find out.
* * * *
As more people arrived and dinner got underway, Kim forced herself to try to relax. Their table had filled up, the previously mentioned Seth and Leah appearing, another new couple sitting next to them, as well as three people Kim wasn’t sure how to process at first.
Not that Tilly, her husband, Landry, and their partner Cris weren’t nice, because they seemed very nice. It was Kim’s obvious confusion about their situation that finally made Tilly giggle.
“We’re poly,” she volunteered to Kim, who blushed.
“Sorry?”
“It’s complicated,” Landry offered. He had a slight accent, maybe French, but Kim couldn’t quite place it. “Don’t worry, some days the two of them keep me guessing as well.”
Liability Page 3