“They killed her,” Katheryne breathed and she stood, fists clenched so tight her nails bit into her palms. Derren sensed her fury hiding beneath the veneer she was being forced to maintain.
He embraced her, and she fell weeping into his arms.
“They gave my mother’s soul to Tenybris, Derren,” she whispered, “They reached back through time and offered her up to him.”
Derren rounded on his old teacher. What he felt now was beyond hate. He wanted to end him but couldn’t. There was more they needed to know, but Derren vowed that every moment of his remaining life would be utterly miserable. And he would not die easily. Derren would see to that.
Then he looked at his lover’s face and saw the dread in her eyes, the tragic certainty of what she had to do. He realised the truth and his heart turned to ice. The fate of untold realities rested in the decisions about to take place in the next few minutes. They met each other’s gaze with despair etched onto both faces; they knew there was only one choice.
Katheryne had to go back. Go back and correct the aberration in time before the universe was utterly destroyed. She had to erase the last two years of their lives to prevent Tenybris using her mother’s spirit to free him from his prison to begin his conquest again.
And if Sanctuary was lost to them with Tenybris’s followers in charge, any hope of organised resistance would be denied to them. They would be utterly defeated.
None of this mattered, however, as they saw the anguish in the other’s eyes. It had taken so long, the pain of disappointment and loneliness as Derren searched for her had ended. Finally they were together, joined at last body and soul as one. But now Katheryne had to wipe it all away, everything they had shared and felt and experienced over the last few fleeting days. Days that had lasted an eternity, all of it would be gone.
33 – Sanctuary – Hearts broken
Derren ran his hand along the curve of her back. He knew she was ticklish, but the sounds she made weren’t laughter. He delighted in it anyway, as if anything escaping her lips was music to his soul.
Katheryne rolled over to face him and she put her hand up to touch the side of his face, drawing him down to her lips, needing him to kiss her.
Heat exploded as they touched, neither seeming to tire of the other’s embrace, the contact of their bodies, physical and spiritual.
Their first physical coupling had been…intense. The experience in the dream had been the height of rapture, but it was cast into insignificance by the sensation of feeling Katheryne move against him. They had provoked reactions in each other which had driven them to the edge of madness and lust, drawing back only when both were finally spent.
Now the passion reignited, Katheryne’s hunger matched by his own, her need for him overwhelming, as her mouth parted and she invited his tongue to explore her.
Their breath became the others as they tasted each and every sensation their souls offered. It was exquisite, perfect. What they shared made creation pale into inconsequence.
The hollow in Katheryne’s dream, the same one they were both entwined in now had been the catalyst for the passion, the helpless embrace they were in, and they needed to milk every instant, for both of them felt the disaster ahead.
For now it didn’t matter. They soaked each other up. Every emotion, every feeling and memory they shared as if they too had experienced it.
The thoughts of each other were vague, in fact they didn’t matter. Thought was irrelevant as desire took over, driving concern for anything else away. Katheryne responded as Derren caressed her, her pleasure resounding throughout him, feeding back into her in a loop of never ending ecstasy.
She writhed and bucked beneath him, gasping and calling his name over and over.
And then he was beneath her, her body a vision as she straddled him, loving him as she felt him inside her, fire exploding within them both, seemingly endless, but not enough to fulfil their needs; never enough for that.
In the end they lay, one soul in two bodies, together for an instant, but damned to be apart forever. Each tried uselessly to draw on a thread of hope they could be forever together.
That they could be here now, in each other’s arms, seemed to taunt them, somehow giving them hope they could be with each other for more than a moment.
Agony etched Derren’s face as he drew Katheryne mouth to his in a final passionate kiss. There might be another embrace before the goodbye, but this was their last sharing of souls and they mingled, merging in mutual union.
Katheryne’s eyes as they parted were devastated, as were his. Their hearts broke as they drew apart, needing but not wanting to accept what had to be.
As they stood and began to get dressed it was as if a wall was forming between them. They both knew it was necessary for their mutual sanity, for if they gave in and defied what they both had to do, then all creation would suffer an eternity in bondage and torment as Tenybris consumed the universe.
What they had discovered had been done was so profoundly shocking, so ultimately destructive that it must be prevented, and Katheryne was the only one capable of doing so.
B’ran had used the twisted being Dwenn’s power to break the cardinal rule which all Liberi were unable to.
They realised the rot throughout Sanctuary was unassailable. B’ran, though now dead at Derren’s hand, had confirmed the majority of the leadership had already been turned, and no action by them could prevent the others from succumbing within days.
Except for widespread executions there was no way to prevent the fall of this world, which was another force guiding Katheryne toward what she had to do.
As they walked towards the camp set up on the beach she realised she didn’t even know how she was to do it. None of the Liberi could describe the process of time travel because they were genetically incapable of even attempting it.
The memories that she had taken from B’ran were useless, because he had used Dwenn to carry out the atrocity. Dwenn was gone too, and thankfully Krista had survived intact. She was scarred deeply, but she was still here with her brother and Katheryne.
She thought of Perri now and how much she missed her. She should be here now, and she knew Krista would feel the same happiness.
There was something happening between the two of them. Katheryne wasn’t sure either of them knew it, but as Krista had broken when Dwenn’s trap almost killed them all, Perri had fallen for her. Her bravado about cute guys and her feigned shock at Krista’s sexuality had been an act, Katheryne knew now.
She supposed she should have been surprised. Perri had never given any indication of being attracted to anyone other than boys, and she knew what was emerging between her friend and Krista would probably surprise her as much as it did Katheryne.
But all she felt now was a reluctant acceptance, only reluctant because it didn’t matter. In a short while all this would be gone and who would ever know if the moment needed for Perri to fall for Krista would ever come about again.
Oh my god Katheryne thought. The block was gone now that Dwenn was dead. She could go get Perri.
But just as she had this thought she realised, what would be the point? She could bring her here for a few hours, only to wipe them from reality a short time later.
She felt so alone. She couldn’t reach out to Derren without risking the possibility of both of them rebelling against what had to happen.
She couldn’t bring Perri here to talk, if even for a moment.
And Krista was still so damaged, thinking she was so alone without realising there was another hope for her soul.
“Hurts doesn’t it?”
Katheryne jumped as she realised Chran had sneaked up on her. Sneaked may have been too strong a word, however. His people had developed a genetic ability to camouflage themselves over five hundred years ago. It came naturally to them now, enough so she could barely see him in the twilight under the jungle.
“Leaving someone behind I mean,” he continued in his deep low voice, “Someone you love.�
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He sat there, dark as the jungle around him, but with his eyes twinkling in sadness.
“Who were they?” Katheryne asked as she sensed a kindred spirit.
Chran sat down beside her and she was shocked to discover she had been sitting here for so long.
Derren had walked to the far side of the fire to spend some time with his sister.
“My wife and daughter,” he said as his skin turned a shade of blue. “I watched as our home was burned by the dragons. I couldn’t lift a finger.”
Katheryne blanched in empathy as she felt his anger.
“It’s so cruel the way it happens to us you know. We only gain our power in death they say.” He sat, and bitterness flowed from him.
“The lucky ones don’t remember. Normally the Liberi travel when they’re young, too young to remember clearly what came before their arrival.”
“But some of us have lived a life beforehand, got married and had a family. I had both.”
Katheryne felt Chran’s pain. She felt it and needed to help him, but as she projected her power, he turned to her.
“Please...don’t. I need to remember. The hurt helps.” She withdrew, understanding his denial.
“You need to keep the memories for both of you Katheryne,” said Chran, now a shade of deep red. Slowly she began to understand the subtle change in shade as passion.
“You’re about to take away the last two years of everyone’s existence, and after it’s done there will only be one person left who will have the memories of what has happened. You, Katheryne will remember it all.”
“And if they had been mundane, ordinary experiences, well, that would have been fine. It will be unfortunate for some of course but unimportant to most. But you will retain the hurt and the pain the rest of us don’t remember, because we will have never experienced it.”
He grew intense now.
“Your memories are neither mundane nor ordinary Katheryne. They are vital,” he stressed. “Hold onto them because like my memories of my family, they matter. More to you than me perhaps, though mine are precious to me.”
“But with yours you can create a hope again. Perhaps even rediscover your love with Derren, even though he will be a different Derren from the one you know now.”
Katheryne heart convulsed at this. There would only ever be one Derren for her. Any other would be judged by his standard and she knew no matter how lofty they reigned they would be as nothing compared to him.
“I’m sorry,” said Chran. “Perhaps I should not have said anything.” He got up to leave, his skin a shade of dark blue again.
Katheryne was going to let him go without a word. But she turned to him and put her hand on his arm, and was shocked by how warm Chran’s skin was.
“Thank you,” she said, feeling bittersweet, “Thank you for opening my eyes.” She smiled warmly as she went on.
“I may curse you for it over the years, but I’ll never deny you told me the truth.”
Chran nodded, grief etched on his face as he walked away.
Katheryne sat and watched him, experiencing the same pain, and as she looked around she wondered if she would have the strength to do this. All these people sat around the fire with her were about to simply cease to exist.
She rose and began a slow walk down to the water’s edge, wondering at the reality of her dream made physical as the waves began to lap over her bare feet. Suddenly Derren was there beside her and as he took her hand she shivered and almost pulled it away.
But instead she turned and looked up again for what she knew would be the last time in this reality.
“I don’t want you to say goodbye,” he said. “There would be little point when only you will remember saying it.”
He stood looking down at her with that lopsided grin and her heart shattered into a billion pieces. Tears flowed freely and dropped to the sand below as she reached up to touch his cheek tenderly.
“I don’t want to lose you Derren,” she cried, “but I know I have to. Damn it, why does everything have to be so cruel.”
She began to feel bitter but Derren put a finger against her lips. He took her into his arms and she put her head into his chest. She could hear and feel the beat of his heart and time seemed to stand still.
“You will never lose me, my love,” he said tenderly, tears welling in his eyes also, “I will always be there in your heart as you have always been in mine. If the universe were to be destroyed a thousand times it wouldn’t matter, because what we have cannot be wiped away by something as trivial as time.”
“But what I’m about to do, to all of this” she beckoned to the island around them, “All of you will be gone forever.”
Derren smiled and shook his head.
“Not forever Katheryne…only for a little while,” he whispered, “One day we’ll meet again.” He cupped her head gently raising it so that he could look into the deep pools of emerald light that were her eyes, the eyes which had haunted his every waking moment for decades.
“There are a few things I’m certain of you know, and that we will meet again is one of them,” he promised, smiling. “Our souls will find the other part of itself across the gulf of the universe and they will know each other’s essence.” He raised the palm of his hand to cover her heart and Katheryne saw tears glisten in the moonlight as they flowed down his face.
“You just need to keep this half inside you safe and intact.” He glanced down to where his hand touched her, “So that when we do find each other again you can heal the fracture.”
He kissed her, each of them tasting the saltiness of the others tears on their lips and Katheryne knew Chran was wrong.
She was certain, totally without doubt now that whatever Derren she met would become hers again when their souls touched. For she knew that the love for him she held within her would be enough, because it was limitless and eternal.
And as her awareness drew outwards she looked down at the two bodies below and saw the energies flowing through them.
It was one constant aura of golden light which at once completely enveloped them before shifting to a shaft that passed through both hearts before intertwining their whole beings. And between the two bodies was the single soul that bound them together, unbreakable and irresistible.
She had dreaded this moment of parting for days and had done everything she could, made every excuse to delay it, but as Katheryne watched the scene below her she knew she was perceiving a constant in the universe. And she knew even as she soared upward, with Sanctuary now an insignificant pinprick of light below, she wasn’t leaving Derren. How could she leave something behind when she carried it inside her?
She stretched beyond, and the whole of the Never was below her now as if she was somehow detached from it. Her head struggled to comprehend what had just happened. Surely the Never was limitless she thought, but as she looked she could perceive a curvature stretching over the horizon.
She thought dimly back to a high school geography class where the subject had been infinity. Infinity, if she recalled correctly definitely did not have a curvature, of this she was certain.
So if the Never wasn’t endless, what was it?
Around her was utter blackness, the true void of nothingness she had thought the Never was. She was overcome with a feeling of vertigo briefly as her consciousness attempted to comprehend the sheer scale of it all.
And as if her consciousness had listened to her she suddenly held the Never suspended weightless in the palm of her hand. It was so small but she was still able to reach in and perceive the smallest most insignificant thread within it.
My God, what am I? Katheryne thought? God? Goddess? No, she could never be so arrogant as to think that. The being who was Katheryne shivered in relief at her mortality. She was still her, of this she was certain.
But what am I? She asked herself again.
You are hope! She heard the voice as if it was speaking from everywhere at once. It almost overwhelmed her as the power b
ehind it flowed through her, and she knew however powerful she was destined to become would be nothing compared to this being.
Suddenly the presence was there before her and she looked on in wonder as a form took shape. She had expected a vision of angelic power, but appearing before her was the form of an old man, ancient even, though he still had the aura of power unlimited coming from him.
“Yes, yes that’s much better,” he said brightly as he ran his hands down over himself, inspecting his body as if it was somehow alien to him.
He wore a simple robe of brown cloth, tied with a sash rope as a belt. His hair was curly but as white as snow as it tumbled down over his shoulders. And his face, although ancient possessed an ageless quality and an unmistakeable warmness.
“It’s been so long since I took form I’d forgotten what I looked like.” He winked mischievously at Katheryne. “Still got it though haven’t I, the ability to make an entrance?”
Katheryne gaped at his expression. This being who had just appeared before her, the one she knew had unlimited power, had just smiled and winked at her.
He could see she was astounded and completely confused so he waved his hand with a flourish and a laugh and they were back on the Island.
It was identical to the beach she had left just a few minutes ago but Katheryne knew it wasn’t quite right. As she looked across to see the old man studying her with a look of curiosity in his ancient eyes, he smiled in satisfaction.
“Very good, very good indeed, you can tell this is all a construct.” He waved his hand indicating their surroundings, but it wasn’t a statement that required an answer. “I thought it might be a little more comfortable to have a familiar place where we could talk.”
Even his voice seemed ancient thought Katheryne, but it was warm and friendly and she could feel herself relaxing. She couldn’t be sure if the calmness overcoming her was natural or some sort of spell being cast, but she knew there was no malicious intent; and there was the fact she was still curious.
Souls of the Never: A Fantasy Scifi Romance Time Travel series, with Dragons, Elves and Faeries. (Tales of the Neverwar Series Book 1) Page 16