The week had been busy. I was trying to get through the paperwork to extradite Cary Saunders back to the States without tipping off anyone in Homicide regarding what I was doing. Craig had a friend at the FBI…former fuck buddy, I reckoned…and he was helping us go through the proper channels, but he wasn't exactly happy he was dealing with Vice instead of Homicide. I left that magic for Craig to work.
We'd had a meeting with our L-T and shown her the footage we'd been given by Preston Wayne, and she insisted we take it to the District Attorney. She wasn't thrilled at having to involve those fuckers in Homicide either, so we were treading carefully.
We had signed affidavits from Preston and Park Hahn regarding the footage from their CCTV systems, and the Assistant District Attorney assigned to the case had other documentation from the officers…David and Josh included…who worked the crime scene.
When those two showed up for a meeting with our L-T and the A.D.A., they didn't speak to each other, which caused Craig to elbow me, but they both gave supportive testimony regarding the evidence collected at the scene, which was corroborated by the crime scene folks who were a branch of Homicide.
The Homicide guy who finally ended up getting assigned at the insistence of the A.D.A. was a young detective, new to the Department. The older vets had determined Drew was just the unfortunate result of being a rent boy who picked the wrong john, so they shoved it off on the new kid, Nathan Offer. Thankfully, he wasn't so jaded yet and he took the case seriously and was willing to work with us, allowing Craig and me to really lead the investigation without any interference. I was warming up to the kid.
The Assistant District Attorney contacted a judge, with Nathan's support, who signed a warrant for Cary Saunders and Jeremy Corner to be picked up as persons-of-interest, and the APBs were finally issued. Nathan, Craig, and I were working to try to ascertain Corner's whereabouts, but we'd come up dry. Unfortunately, Cary had left the villa in Spain with no trace, according to some Interpol colleagues Nathan had contacted in Italy. It was yet another dead end.
"We can stop on the way if you'd like. It's whatever you want, Gray. I did some research and found a tree farm in Pasadena, just off the highway. I printed off the directions from the internet and we can stop on our way back to Houston," I offered, holding up the paper.
Gray made the two of us coffees to go, and we set out on our journey. I had a feeling it wasn't going to be pleasant, but I hoped he'd get some comfort out of the visit. He told me he hadn't been back to the cemetery since his brother's internment, and he felt guilty. I’d do anything I could to alleviate that pain for him.
We drove down the 610, and I decided to broach a subject I was pretty sure he wouldn't want to discuss. "Are you sure about not stopping by your parents' place? I can wait outside."
He sighed. "I don't know. Let me think about it, okay?"
"Sure," I responded. I decided to change the subject. "We need to look for a car for you. I worry about you walking and taking the bus, so I think after the first of the year, we'll look for something. Any idea what you might like?"
He giggled, which brought a smile to my face. "I don't need a car. I enjoy the exercise."
I turned to him, glancing at the highway. "Yeah, fine during the day, but when you work nights and walk to the bus stop to take the bus home, I worry about you getting home okay. I can't always pick you up, and I don't want to worry. We can get you a newer used model for a good price. I think a small SUV like Marisol's would be perfect. When we get ice or snow, this thing won't go anywhere. If we got an SUV, we'd be able to get around all the time." I hoped I was convincing because I could see immediately he was skeptical regrading my motives, but he had to know his safety was my number on priority.
"Let me think about it, please? Take the next exit," he pointed out. I took it and he directed me toward the diner. We had a nice breakfast, and then we stopped at a flower shop in town where Gray purchased a bouquet of forget-me-nots. I'd seen the tiny blue flowers on bushes around my parents' neighborhood, but I had no idea what they were called or what the sentiment behind the flower meant until Gray asked the florist.
He took over the driving, steering us to the cemetery but not saying anything. I was taking in the small town while Gray kept his eyes looking steadily ahead until he parked the car in the gravel parking lot next to a small, red-brick church with a white steeple. The sign in front read, "First Southern Baptist Church. All are welcome to worship." I had my doubts about that sentiment.
We got out of the car, and after we met in front of it, I handed Gray the bouquet. I took his empty hand and kissed it, seeing he looked worried. I led him to the gate, opening it for him and allowed him to lead us through the cemetery. "Do you remember where it is? I know you were only here once, so should we split up?" I enquired, reverently.
He looked around and spotted a very large pecan tree. "It's over there. I remember that tree the day of the funeral."
I nodded and turned the two of is in that direction. We walked down the row of headstones and when we reached the headstone of Gerald Eric Carson, I heard Gray sniff. We cleared the debris from the grave and Gray placed the flowers into the vase affixed to the red, marble headstone. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a bottle of water, adding it for the flowers.
After he was satisfied, he knelt down and sat on his heels. "Hi, Gerry. I'm sorry I've been away. After Mom and Dad…well, you know what happened, I’d guess. I haven't been back to see you, but I'm here today because I wanted to introduce you to the man I love," Gray began.
I wasn't sure if I should stay, so I backed up a little to give him some privacy. I began looking around and saw some old, white marble stones with the name 'Carson' on them. I was guessing they were relatives of Gray's, but I wasn't about to ask. There was a fresh grave at the end of the line where his brother's grave was located, and I wanted to walk down to see if it was recent, but I didn't dare.
"Derek, can you…will you sit down?" he asked as he patted the ground next to him.
I sat down and took his hand, seeing the tears on his sweet face. "Gerry, this is my guy, Derek Little Hawk Valentine. He's a decent sort of fellow, I guess." I turned to look at him, seeing the big grin.
I kissed his cheek. "Gerry, it's great to meet you. Gray's told me some things about you, and I'm so happy he had you to support him when you guys were growing up.
"My people believe when we leave this world, we don't leave this plane of existence. We walk among the living and provide love and support to our loved ones until we believe they're ready to be on their own and can let us go. Well, that's a loose interpretation because I didn't really listen closely to the stories my mom used to tell me, but I think that's the gist.
"Anyway, I believe you've been with Gray, supporting him through some difficult times, and as his partner, I'd like to thank you. I want you to know I'm here to take care of him now, so if you'd like to go to your eternal peace, I'll take over your job," I explained quietly.
Gray sobbed at my words, and I pulled him into my chest. I kissed his head and felt a few tears of my own. I knew it was a good idea to bring him because he needed closure. He'd been kicked out the day his brother was buried, and he needed to say the things to his brother he hadn't been able to say previously.
After a while, I turned him to look at me. "Why don't you talk a little more to your brother? I'll just walk around a bit. My rear is asleep." He laughed and kissed my lips. "Go."
I hopped up and stretched as I stomped my feet to wake them. I leaned forward and kissed the top of his head before I strolled down the row, glancing at the headstones. Based on the dates, I could see it was Gray's grandparents and an uncle who'd died as a child. When I got to the relatively fresh-looking grave, I glanced at the black stone, and I was fucking shocked.
Gray Thomas Carson
October 28, 1995 – August 3, 2013
To say I was shocked would be an understatement. What his parents had done was abso-fuckin-lutely crazy. His br
other's headstone read:
Gerald Ray Carson
February 8, 1998 – August 2, 2013
Beloved Son
Missed Eternally
I double checked that shit, and I knew I had to get Gray the fuck out of there before he saw that stone. His fucking parents had actually erected a headstone as if he'd died? I couldn't comprehend it and I didn’t want him to see it. He was heartbroken enough by losing his family. He didn’t need to know the depth of their contempt for him.
I walked back to where he was sitting, chatting at that piece of marble as if his brother was sitting across from him at a diner. It was a good thing to take him there. It was a better thing to get him the fuck out of there.
Based on the fact the dirt looked like it hadn't yet settled, I decided to do some research regarding how they'd pulled it off. That would be my first priority. If they'd somehow dummied up something to claim he was dead, we needed to head that shit off before it fucked up his identity. If that's what they did, I'd make sure they were prosecuted for fraud, the fucks.
"Baby, we need to go if we're gonna get a tree before it gets too dark and we end up with some God-awful leftover thing," I whispered as I leaned forward and kissed his neck.
"Oh, yeah. Sorry. I lost track of time. So, Gerry, uh, I need to take off because Derek and I are going to get a Christmas tree. It’ll be our first one together, and as you know, my first one ever. I'll be thinking of the Christmases when we were kids and how much you loved them and I wish you could be here to celebrate it with us. I really miss you, but I'm glad you're not in pain any longer. I love you, little brother." He leaned forward, placing his hand on the cold marble square, offering his warmth as if he’d taken his brother’s hand. I had to swallow the lump in my throat it was so sweet.
He then offered his hand to me, and I helped him up, pulling him into my arms and turning him toward the car so he didn't see that shit down at the end of the line. I helped him into the car and hurried around to the driver's side, hopping in and getting us the fuck out of there before he noticed the dirt at the end of the row. Those people deserved hell to rain down on them, fire, brimstone, and all.
##
"I like that one," Gray pointed to a nice tree of about six-feet which should fit well in our apartment. It was narrow, but it was thick with lots of branches, so I was immediately on board. We were gonna get a live tree in the pot, but they wanted a small fortune for them, so we settled on a cut tree. I really didn't care either way. I was doing it for Gray.
"Yeah. Me too." I went to the man, negotiating the price a little. I might have flashed my badge as I looked for my wallet. I heard Gray laughing behind me as he handed the man sixty dollars. The asshole wanted seventy-five, but he settled on sixty. I supposed we got the best deal he was gonna give us.
We tied the damn tree to the top of the car after I pulled out a tarp to be sure it didn't puncture through the convertible top. I drove slower on the way home than I had on the way down, and when we arrived at the apartment, we were in a hurry to get the tree inside.
We carried it up to our place, and before we dragged it inside, Gray stopped me. "Let me get a sheet so we can lay it down while we go shopping for stuff. We don't have a tree stand, and it's gonna need water. I'll be right back."
Yeah, my handsome boyfriend thought of shit I didn't, which was really a blessing in my life. Maybe his parents were fucked up and didn’t appreciate him, but I damn well would…every fucking day I drew a breath.
Twelve
Gray
I laid in bed on Sunday morning and thought about the previous day. It had been difficult, but with Derek by my side? I could survive anything, I was sure. Being able to talk to Gerry, even if it was just in my heart, made me feel as if I was unloading a burden I didn’t want to heap on Derek.
"I'm not sorry I told them I was gay because you gave me the confidence to be honest, but they disappointed both of us by kicking me out. I'm not sure why you thought they'd accept me, but I think that was just because you were such an accepting soul, yourself. It didn't work out like you thought it might, but my life got really great when I met Derek," I prattled on.
Derek had left me alone with Gerry…or Gerry's headstone…but I appreciated the privacy. Somehow being at Gerry's grave had me worked up to say things I hadn't felt I could say for God knows what reason. He was no more in that grave than he was walking with me every day, but if there was any truth to what Derek had told me about him being with me, supporting me? Well, then he knew the shit I'd gone through.
"Derek's sister is pregnant, and it doesn't sound like she wants to keep the baby, but I'm hoping she'll carry it to term and maybe ask us if we'd be willing to care for it and maybe raise it. I mean, I'm sure she'll come around and want her child after she gets over the initial shock. I think she's just scared because everything is so messed up right now, but if she doesn't want the baby, I'll take it and love it. Well, I guess you know that," I told him like we were sitting in his room talking as we had when we were younger. God, I missed him.
Derek returned and seemed to be in a hurry for us to leave. I got it because cemeteries were creepy places, and we'd been there for more than an hour. As I thought about it, I realized I'd actually reached peace in my soul regarding Gerry, so I said good-bye and we left the area. I wanted to ask to drive by my parents' place, but I didn't want to see the house where I'd grown-up because I didn’t want the unhappy memories to invade the joy I felt in my heart. Besides, that place wasn't home any longer. My home was wherever Derek Valentine laid his head.
I finally hauled my lazy ass out of bed and called my best friend, Beth Allen. Derek had to go into work that morning, and I needed to do some shopping for holiday decorations but I didn't want to do it alone. If I was being honest, I’d really missed her and wanted to spend time with her the way we did before I moved.
"You better be bleeding out," I heard her mumble. I could hear Tim in the background talking about kicking my ass, but I just laughed at the two of them. They still weren't morning people, as I’d come to learn when I moved in with Beth. It was comforting to know some things didn’t change.
"I want to go buy Christmas ornaments, and I want you guys to go with me. Derek and I picked up a real tree yesterday after we went to Friendswood to visit Gerry's grave. We don't have any ornaments, and I hoped maybe you guys would come along and help me pick some things.
"Derek has to work, but he left me his credit card and he told me he expected me to have the stuff to put up the tree when he got home. He also left me the Camaro, so I can come pick you up," I tempted, knowing Tim was obsessed with the car.
She relayed the information, and I heard a "fuck yeah" in the background which made me smile. We set a time for me to pick them up before we hung up, both of them giggling which made me smile. As much as I missed them both, I was happy they were in love and were in a good relationship. They truly did love each other, and it confirmed the feeling in my heart that moving in with Derek was the right thing to do for all of us.
After I sorted the laundry on the bedroom floor, I put in a load of whites. Derek loved the new fabric softener I’d bought because it didn’t smell like flowers…his old one did, apparently. The new one smelled like the ocean breeze, and he loved to snuggle in our bed after we changed the sheets. He said it made my skin smell amazing, and as strange as it was, he did bury his nose in my neck every morning before we got out of bed to start our day. The memory of him doing that precise thing earlier that morning made me smile as I put some chicken into an Italian marinade for our dinner that night.
Beth, Tim, and I shopped at some discount stores to buy lights, ornaments, and garland. The garland was a bone of contention among us because Tim suggested tinsel, which I hated because it was messy, while Beth suggested beads, which I hated because it was a Christmas tree, not a damn lounge act.
Never having had a Christmas tree before, I wanted the more traditional look I’d seen on television or in magazines as a
kid, so I chose the silver garland we found at one of the discount stores. I knew it would be easier to remove after the holiday, and if I was careful when putting it away, we'd be able to use it for more than one year. Plus, it would reflect the multi-colored lights I’d chosen and would give off a rainbow effect in our apartment, which was perfect for us.
We drove back to Derek’s and my place, and Tim helped me get the bags inside while Beth followed us, laughing at me all the way up to our floor. I knew I was behaving like an excited little boy, as Beth had teased me all afternoon, but I couldn’t help myself. I was so damn exhilarated about the prospect of a real Christmas, I couldn't contain it.
I’d bought the tree stand we needed, and Tim kindly helped me anchor the tree into it and filled it with water. I’d wrapped wet towels around the base the night before to try to keep it moist until I could get the stand, and the tree didn’t appear any worse for wear, thankfully.
I turned to my friends after we’d placed the tree in front of the windows, comparing it to the visions in my head from childhood of how great a Christmas tree would look in my first home. "Will you guys stay for dinner? I'm pretty sure Derek will be home sooner than later. I've been marinating chicken all afternoon, and I’ll make fettuccine alfredo to go with it. You two can help us decorate the tree," I suggested. I'd enjoyed spending time with them that Sunday, and I guess I sounded a little desperate for company because I saw the concern on Beth’s face.
She placed her hand on my shoulder as we sat on the couch while Tim continued to fuck with the tree, claiming it wasn’t level in the stand. "I think, Gray, this is an occasion where you and Derek should spend the night together, alone. Timmy and I put up our tree the other night, and damn, it was amazing…not the tree, but the sex after," she whispered with a glowing smile.
A Valentine's Quest (The Valentine's Trilogy) Page 9