“Bollocks, yeah…you’ll be off work for a bit. Well, what about that crowdfunding thing? Could you pull money from there?”
She shook her head. “I hoped it might pay for the bills Mom already has, but it won’t even do that. We’ve only raised two thousand of the fifteen-thousand-dollar goal.”
“That’s better than nothing.”
“Yeah, but it barely makes a dent, especially now that she needs a transplant. I kinda wish we hadn’t done it; I haven’t told Mom about it yet…”
“She still doesn’t know?”
“No. It’s depressing, seeing such little interest.” She smiled tightly. “So, I have to take all the Sephora shifts I can get and keep saving like Scrooge. It’s not like I have a choice.”
“Isn’t there anyone else in your family who could do this? I worry about you. Call me selfish, but I don’t want anything to happen to my girlfriend—”
“Girlfriend?” She stopped, jerking Ben to a halt.
Well, that just slipped out. “Um…” Still holding her hand, he moved closer. There’s no sense denying it—not anymore. I’m ready for a commitment. I can’t lose her—to anyone or anything. “I know we haven’t talked about being exclusive, but…I think you know I have been, and I want to…with you. So, yeah…I want to be your boyfriend.” Agh! Ben held his breath. Did I do that right? I feel like I’m fourteen! First time for everything…
Her smile grew. “You like me, huh?”
“Yeah.” His gaze fell to her lips. “Quite a lot, actually.”
Grin widening, Riley cupped his face and kissed him softly as Ben slipped his arms around her waist. He settled in, the need to go deeper reserved for another day when hospitals and organ donations weren’t at the forefront of their minds.
A passing car laid on its horn…several times.
Gotta love New York. Ben laughed against her lips and broke away, reclaiming Riley’s hand as they moved forward.
“So, boyfriend”—she giggled, ducking under a low-hanging tree branch—“don’t worry, I’ll be fine, and so will Mom. I can feel it.”
“There’s no talking you out of this?” Ben gripped a dangling leaf, pulling it with him.
“Nope.”
He let go and the leaf snapped back. “You’re amazing. You’re also scaring the bejesus out of me, but I get it.”
“Good.” She swung his hand, walking in silence for a few steps. “So, how did the audition go?”
“Eh…all right.”
“Just all right?”
“I don’t think I’m what they’re looking for.”
“Really? But you read for them three times.”
“Yeah, but all the callbacks today were blond, captain-of-the-football-team types. I felt like the brown-haired runt of the high school litter.”
“But runts are more interesting. They’re stupid if they don’t pick you.”
“Riles, if only you were the casting director.” Ben wrapped his arm around her.
“Well, never say never. I was looking at BBC job postings yesterday when I was supposed to be doing data entry and I found a casting position in LA. Not that I’m qualified, but a girl can dream…”
“Maybe one day, eh? See anything else that looked good?” She deserves a break. She works so hard.
“A few entry-level jobs in production, a part-time assistant and a full-time one—right here in the New York office.”
“You should apply.” Ben squeezed her shoulder.
“I already did! I know it’s not LA, but I need to keep my options open.” She shook her head. “I don’t want to be scared about the future anymore. I need to focus on now, on Mom—you—” Her smile grew. “Mom’s appointment today was scary, but when the doctor said there was an option to donate…Ben, I felt so empowered! From now on, it’s like I’m scaling rocks again—I’m using everything I’ve got to hang on and keep climbing to help Mom beat this, once and for all.”
“You’ll like this, then.” Ben reached into his backpack. “I got you something the other day.” He pulled out a re-sealable plastic pouch.
Riley’s eyes immediately lit up. “Climbing chalk!”
“For a better grip on your climb, brave girl.” He kissed her cheek.
“Thanks, Ben, really…”
“Boyfriend did good?”
“Yeah, you did good, but it’s more than that.” She squeezed the pouch in her hands. “Thank you…for believing in me.”
Forty-Nine
Children darted around topiary and happy in-laws oohed and aahed as Erika and Scott—the new Mr. and Mrs. Perrault—kissed for the photographer, their loving embrace mirrored in the sunken garden’s reflecting ponds. Their historic venue, built in 1919 on Long Island’s wealthy Gold Coast, looked like a fairytale castle and was famous for celebrity weddings, movie shoots, and music videos. When Erika discovered Taylor Swift had filmed her “Blank Space” video there, she chose the gorgeous mansion for her and Scott’s special day.
Dodging the couple’s two hundred-plus guests, Riley led bowtie-wearing Stanley Pup on his leash around the vast property, careful to avoid grass stains on the hem of her lilac bridesmaid dress. Her sojourn also allowed her to elude Josh and his date as well as Leia, who had only traded stilted small talk throughout the festivities. So far, so good.
Stanley paused to gnaw on some grass, so Riley checked her phone, finding a text waiting from Ben.
Hey pretty mer-maid of honor, don’t cop off with any hockey-playin ushers!!! He also added to his ‘4 Riles!!!’ playlist with “I’m Your Man” by Wham!.
She giggled and glanced up, her breath catching. Shit! Leia, wearing an identical lilac dress, was striding toward her. Dread fluttered in Riley’s stomach. Great. Can I slip behind this tall bush? She checked in with Stanley. He was lifting his leg for a pee, scuttling her escape. Argh, right now, Pup?!
“Hey.” Leia raised her hand in a static wave, a blush of sunburn on the tip of her nose. “Beautiful day, huh?”
“Yeah.” Riley glanced skyward, trying to smile like she meant it. “Erika always gets what she wants.”
“I know. It’s sickening, isn’t it?”
Riley swallowed, trying to soothe the ache in the back of her throat. Stanley strained at his leash, sniffing Leia’s dress. What does she want?
“Um, I just wanted to have a private moment to…uh…” Leia sighed and clutched the diamond pendant resting on her décolletage. “Listen, what happened with me and Ben…”
Taking a deep breath, Riley stared Leia in the eye. Yikes, where is this going?
“Can I share my side of what happened?”
Riley responded with a wary nod.
Leia toyed with her pendant. “I was checking out strip clubs for Erika when I got a text, another rumor about Tyler—more cheating, a different girl. It felt like fucking Groundhog Day. I wanted to lash out and forget. I wasn’t sure what to do.” She shrugged. “I watched the dancers, had a few drinks, but they didn’t dull my anger. I could feel the need for revenge burning through me, so I thought, Fuck it. I took my rings off, hid ’em in my wallet, and then Ben sat at the bar…all friendly, blue eyes you could get lost in, and that British accent…”
For fuck’s…I don’t need to hear this! Riley broke eye contact and glared over Leia’s shoulder.
“He didn’t say he was a dancer. We got to talking and drinking, and that purple thong guy showed up. He pretty much begged Ben not to come home that night. He had nowhere to sleep, so…”
So, you fucked him—yeah, got it. Riley crossed her arms, met Leia’s gaze again, and saw…regret? Pain? Wait, she’s…not bragging. She’s…ashamed?
Leia squeezed her necklace tighter. “I slept with Ben to get back at Ty. I shouldn’t have bothered. I thought it would make me feel better…it didn’t.” She cleared her throat, the sparkly brilliance of her necklace, cushion-cut engagement ring, and diamond-encrusted wedding band firing glinty flares. “I used Ben to cheat on my husband. I broke my vows, something I tho
ught I’d never do.”
And I never thought I’d use Josh, even if I thought it was for a noble reason. I’ve made mistakes, too, in the name of love. Guilt rose in Riley’s throat and her expression softened. What good is this doing, being mad at Leia? For what? Sleeping with a single guy? One you barely knew at the time. It could’ve been any guy sitting there that night, but it just happened to be Ben. You’ve forgiven him. Forgive her, too.
Riley nodded. “We’ve all been there, we’ve all done things we regret—I know I have.” A slight grin raised her cheeks. “Relationships, huh? They’re never easy.”
Leia’s brows relaxed and she let out a relieved breath. “Erika says, you and Ben…?”
“Yeah.”
“He seems like a nice guy.” Leia nodded.
“He is.”
“You’ll have to tell me what that’s like sometime. I’m happy for you.” Leia let go of her necklace and pointed over her shoulder. “Well, I should get back to Ty…”
Riley smiled kindly. “I hope things work out for you, Leia—really.”
“Yeah, me, too.” Leia gave a pained smile, a tinge of sadness muting her blue eyes. “Good luck with Ben.” She tucked a curl behind her ear and walked away toward the glamourous party, returning to the life Riley had left behind.
Two round, single-layer cakes sat on Maggie’s counter, both coated perfectly with a smooth layer of white buttercream icing. One was Ben’s work-in-progress canvas; pink dots and green swirls speckled the cake’s top, each colorful decoration a little neater than the one that came before.
Ben mopped his brow with the back of his hand and lifted the piping bag full of frosting away from his latest squiggle. Bugger, that was rubbish. His mouth twisted. “Maggie, you’ve got the patience of a saint.”
“Nonsense. You’re learning faster than I did.” She shifted off her tall stool, moving a cake smoother and several piping tips to the side to make more room for Ben to work. “If you apply a little more pressure to the piping bag and hover the tip just above the cake, you’ll get much better control, see?”
Okay, try again. Deep in concentration, Ben’s tongue slid along his bottom lip as the star-shaped tip of the piping bag inched above the cake, depositing a thick ruffle of pink and white buttercream goodness. NOW we’re talking! Ben’s face lit up at his fancy finishing touch. “Look at THAT. It works!” He pulled back, full grin on display.
His attention shifted past the cake to his phone, a new text waking up the dark screen. Riley’s latest add to the ‘4 Benjamin’ playlist had landed: “Throw Your Arms Around Me” by Hunters and Collectors. Oooh, girl! How’d you find that steamy eighties gem? A fan of the song’s sensual lyrics, Ben smiled wider. Wait ’til I see YOU tonight, lady!
Maggie leaned in to check his work and Ben quickly nudged the phone aside. “I’m having a great Saturday!”
Maggie laughed. “You don’t regret staying behind?”
“No. Riley had her maid-of-honor duties, and I dunno, I think she needed to socialize solo with her friends. I don’t want her to drift away from people she’s known forever just because there’s a new boyfriend on the scene. Friendships are important, especially ones from way back.”
“But you could get to know them, too?”
A text Riley received from Erika two days ago popped into his head.
Aw, not being funny, please remind Ben—no vintage Ts, ok? ;)
Erika seemed to think he was incapable of dressing appropriately for her wedding. Like I’d choose a concert tee over a dress shirt. Gimme some credit. “Yeah, I’m starting to, but I’d rather do it when Josh isn’t around. It’s just a bit awkward. He and Scott are pretty tight.” He hunched over the cake with the piping bag, practicing another design.
Maggie nodded, smiling at Ben’s progress. “Oh, angle the bag a little less…”
He lowered the bag so it was practically perpendicular to the cake’s edge.
“Looking great, Ben. Did you bake a lot with your mom when you were a kid?”
“Hell yeah.” He paused and licked icing off his finger. “Ingredients cost a bomb and she worked all hours, but when she had a few quid and time going spare, she made brownies, chocolate chip cookies, and heart-shaped gingerbread. She called them ‘little bites of home-baked love’”. His smile grew. “I found baking relaxing—and fun. And I got to play DJ with her old vinyl when we did it.”
“And an eighties music fan was born!” Maggie glanced down at Ben’s Police t-shirt and reached across the counter, switching on the radio. Smooth, poppy vocals filled the kitchen. “Ah, Boy George!”
“I know this! ‘Time’ by Culture Club. You a fan, Maggie?”
“Yep—my first concert. November 1984, the Brendan Byrne Arena in Rutherford, New Jersey. I was fourteen. My poor dad didn’t know what hit him. God, the things we put our parents through.”
“Why didn’t your mom go?” Ben leaned over and lowered the icing bag again.
“She died when I was five.”
He straightened up, a sad look on his face. “Oh, I’m sorry! I didn’t think…”
“It’s okay. It was a long time ago.” Maggie patted his forearm. “Dad stepped in, did all the things Mom would’ve done. He even bought me makeup. I went to the concert as Boy George!”
“Really? You had the braids and everything?”
Maggie nodded. “Red eyeshadow, crimped hair, neon clothing…”
Ben chuckled. “Mum dressed up in pirate gear with a white stripe across her nose.”
“Like Adam Ant!”
“Yeah, when she wasn’t being Bananarama, wearing crop tops and rags in her hair.”
“I bet she looked amazing!” Maggie bobbed her head to the music. “We had fun! Dad even bought me a fedora so I could copy Duran Duran.”
“It’s kinda like cosplay today, innit? But instead of dressing up for comic cons, you lot did it for gigs.” Ben aimed the piping bag at the cake again. “Were your brothers and sisters into it, too?”
“I’m an only child. My dad died before Riley was born, so it’s just us.”
“No wonder you’re so close.” Ben grinned, but Maggie’s words twisted his stomach. ‘It’s just us.’
It’s true, then. There wasn’t anyone else—Riley really was Maggie’s last hope. Ben swallowed heavily and returned to decorating the cake.
Fifty
The crook of Riley’s elbow pinched each time she straightened her arm. Waiting outside Hunter’s apartment, she picked at the small cotton ball, as fluffy and white as the clouds floating free in the blue sky. But this little cloud wasn’t free; it was trapped, pressed into her skin underneath a cheap plastic bandage.
“Tear it off quickly, you’ll barely feel a thing,” the nurse had said after taking a sample of Riley’s blood less than an hour earlier.
Her fingernail couldn’t leave it alone, pushing under the sticky plastic to torment the cotton, pulling wisps from the ball as hot tears streamed down her flushed cheeks. Some slipped under her chin, others fell, soaking the scoop neck of her yellow tank top. How? HOW?!
Cheery music blaring from an ice cream truck parked a few doors down on Canal Street did nothing to soothe her anguish or blot out the joy-filled giggles of several little girls, nose deep in soft serve cones. Their mothers stood watch—chatting, happily sipping their to-go iced coffees. Moms and daughters… Envy left an uncomfortable lump in Riley’s throat as sobs broke through her lips. Why me? Why us? What did we do to deserve this? She wiped her snotty nose on her forearm, her shoulders slumping toward her denim skirt.
“Riles!” Ben’s brakes squealed as his bike shuddered to a stop. “Oh, love, I got here as soon as I could.”
Everything was blurry. Riley wasn’t sure how Ben got off his bike, where he locked it, or how he helped her upstairs to Hunter’s apartment. She wasn’t sure of anything except that Ben was by her side, hugging her, rubbing her back, kissing her hair, which was damp with tears. “It’s okay, it’s okay,” fell from his lips r
epeatedly.
“I can’t…I…” Tissue pressed to her nose, Riley sat down on the sofa and began to slowly rock back and forth.
Worry creased Ben’s forehead as he dug a hand through the front of his hair, a chaos of tangles left behind by his bike helmet. “I’ll get you some water, okay? Just…I’ll be a sec.”
He crossed the room and filled a glass, watching Riley over his shoulder the entire time.
“I’m sorry…I didn’t mean for you to ditch work.”
“Don’t worry about that.” Ben set the water down on the table and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. “Your text…I panicked. Thank God I was only a few blocks away.” His attention darted from her bloodshot eyes to the bandage, one end lifting from her skin. “I’m so sorry, love. I should’ve been there to hold your hand. Tell me what happened.”
She shook between sobs, gulping for breaths. “They pricked my finger to figure out my blood type. The nurse said results would take two minutes, and she began to take blood from my arm while we waited. It stung when the needle went in, but I was fine after that.”
His fingers traced circles on her bare shoulder as he listened.
“While the blood filled the vial, the nurse looked at the finger test and said I was type A positive. I was like, Okay…and? It didn’t mean anything to me. She looked in my file and…” Anger sizzled in Riley’s belly as her face grew red and sobs broke through her lips. “She…”
“It’s okay, Riles. Take your time.”
She gasped. “She said my blood type isn’t compatible.”
Ben shook his head, confusion clouding his gaze. “But how’s that possible? Don’t mothers and daughters share the same blood type? I thought it was a given.”
“So did I, but apparently, that’s not how it works. She said some people with different blood types can share organs, but Mom has high levels of antibodies in her bloodstream. That means there’s a greater chance her body could reject my liver.” Her chest shuddered. “She said I probably have my dad’s blood type. So, I can’t help Mom who means everything to me”—she gritted her teeth—“but I could help him. I couldn’t believe it. I asked the nurse to check again, but it…it wasn’t a mistake.”
Until The Last Star Fades Page 30