SinSatiable
Copyright 2016 Shelia E. Lipsey
Published by Shelia E. Lipsey at Smashwords
Smashwords Edition License Notes
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This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author's imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Sinsatiable - An insatiable craving for the worldly things in life which feel good, look good, tastes good and brings momentary pleasure, yet in the end yields no lasting satisfaction. Sinsatiable is a word founded and defined by Author Shelia E. Lipsey
Our lives are but for a fleeting moment. Many of us live on the verge of desperation, hoping and clinging to things, people and stuff. We often become lost and caught up in what we can gain from the world. The pleasures of sin often catch hold to many of us because of its ability to entice us. Don’t be mistaken my readers, Sin IS captivating. It feels good. It looks good. It dresses well. Sin is articulate and can take on any form it so chooses – for a while. And it’s only for a while because even though its mask is temporary. It lingers just long enough to pull you into its grasp. However, it eventually has to rear its ugly, vile, deceitful head and reveal what it really is. Don’t think that for one moment you can fight against it under your own strength, because if you think that, you have already been deceived by it. The only sure way to fight it, to get through it, to overcome it, is to go to the one who has the power to destroy it – that one true sovereign one is God. Without Him, we are nothing. With Him, we are more than conquerors. With Him all things are eternal.
CHAPTER 1
“How much did you say? Girl, now that’s some graduation gift! I wonder how much dough you’ll get if you get your Master’s degree – a million?”
“Tameria, you’re as crazy as they come. My grandparents put this money in a trust for me when I was sixteen years old and the only stipulation to receiving the money was that I had to earn my college degree,” Aisha explained.
“I sure wish I had a set of grandparents who left me a little change.”
“I just wish they were still alive to see me fulfill my dreams, Tameria.”
Aisha Carlisle became teary eyed at the thought of her grandparents’ generosity. Growing up as an only child in her household, she was far from spoiled but she was also blessed beyond measure. With the money from her trust fund she planned on fulfilling her dreams of opening a dance studio. Growing up in the Memphis she had a limited opportunity to perfect her gift of dancing like she really wanted. Most of the dance studios in the south catered to country line-dancing, ballet or tap. But she was into more than that. She wanted to incorporate her natural soulful rhythm into her dancing by choreographing her very own dance style. Her dream was to teach young girls how to be both refined and hip in their dancing all at the same time.
She was barely fourteen when she first saw a youth group from a visiting church perform a liturgical dance to the soulful tune Open Your Heart by Yolanda Adams. Their grace and perfect rhythm left her breathless. It wasn’t long after that she formed a dance group at her own church, Temple Cathedral. Now here she was, seven years later with an undergraduate degree in dance and ready to step out into her future. With God on her side, she knew she could do nothing but soar like an eagle because He had shown favor and blessings upon her life. She still shivered at the thought of how much God loved her. She was a little bushy head preteen when she came to accept him as her personal Lord and Savior. When she first told her mom and dad that she wanted to be saved, they said that she should wait until she was a little older. But Aisha was twelve years old. She refused to wait until her parents thought the time was more appropriate. She had a strong desire to belong to God and no one or anything was going to stop her. So that beautiful Sunday morning in June 1994, she boldly walked to the front of the huge sanctuary of and accepted Jesus as her Lord and Savior. Not once had she ever looked back with regrets, even when she faced tragedy in her small, close-knit family.
Her first meeting with tragedy occurred two days after her sixteenth birthday when her mother’s parents who Aisha lovingly called Oma and Opa, had died in a house fire. Aisha recalled the events leading up to their untimely death. Her family and friends had celebrated by surprising her with a lavish sweet sixteen birthday bash. While she was busy opening her gifts, Oma and Opa told her to save their gift and open it last. She did as she was told and after all the other gifts had been oohed and aahhed over, she nervously unwrapped the pink ribbon from around the pink oblong box, expecting to find a trinket or necklace inside. Her guess was right. There was a white gold locket tucked neatly inside the soft salmon colored tissue paper. The locket had her initials set in tiny diamonds on the back and the words Jeremiah 29:11 engraved on the front. Inside were pictures of her grandparents holding an infant Aisha on the day of her christening.
“Aisha, always remember that God’s plan for you is to prosper. He wants you to have a bright future and an eternal hope.” Oma beamed with love as she spoke to her granddaughter.
“Aisha, always put God first in your life and whenever life begins to get you down, and the trials and tribulations begin to come, and they will,” Opa added, “Cling to that scripture in Jeremiah. It’ll remind you of God’s will for your life. You hear me?” Her grandfather spoke with such conviction and wisdom. She loved both of them so much.
”Come on, open the other part of your gift,” her grandmother urged before Aisha could respond. Aisha pulled out the small envelope tucked neatly inside the box. When she opened it, her eyes grew as big as diamonds. “I can’t believe this is for me.”
“What is it, Aisha? Tell us what it is,” several of her friends and family squealed.
“It’s a bank account that’s been set aside for me, but it doesn’t tell me how much is in it.” How much Oma? How much is it for, Opa?”
“We aren’t disclosing that to you just yet young lady,” her grandfather smiled slyly. “You won’t know that until you graduate from college.”
“Graduate from college?” But Maaaaa,” she whined. “Look how long that’ll be.”
“Now Aisha, Oma and Opa know exactly what they’re doing,” her mother said with a look of irritation and impatience. Aisha’s mother always thought her daughter was much too whiny and spoiled. Of course, her husband and his parents were to blame and Sandra Carlisle always resented it. They seemed to forget that Benjamin Carlisle had another daughter up North in Michigan. Sandra loved her only child, but another part of her felt as if she was in constant competition with Aisha for Benjamin’s affection and his attention. It was Sandra’s belief that Aisha managed to be the winner of both every single time. The resentment settled in her heart and whether she chose to admit it or not, Sandra had a difficult time hiding her feelings toward Aisha.
“Aisha, your mother’s right,” her dad added. “Your grandparents know just like I do, that if they give you a substantial amount of money now, you’re just going to either blow it all on clothes or junk. Your current allowance is large enough to provide spending money for your binge buying, so this is a great present for you. You can just let it sit in a Money Market account and draw interest and by the time you graduate from college, you would have accumulated a nice bit of interest on your principal
. And besides, by the time you graduate from college you should be more mature and level-headed and be in a better position to make decisions about your money. Honey, you will have had more time to think about what you r-e-a-l-l-y want to do with it. “Oh, okay.” As she leaned over to hug her grandparents. Thank you Oma. Thank you Opa for this graduation present. I love you both so much.” She planted an affectionate kiss on each of their cheeks.
When Oma and Opa returned to their summer home in Miami tragedy struck while they were asleep. A fire erupted in the modest two-story beach front home. The fire had spread so rapidly that the firemen said that her grandparents didn’t stand a chance of escaping. They both died from intense smoke inhalation. .
During this difficult time in her life, Aisha remained focused on God. She spoke at her grandparents’ funeral, sharing with everyone her deep love and devotion for them. She spoke like the wonderful young woman she was as she told of her grandparents’ love and devotion for God and family. She also performed a touching and emotional dance while fighting back her tears of grief.
CHAPTER 2
Aisha was a college graduate with a little money, an unshakeable faith and trust in God, and a huge world to conquer. She was on her way to the life she had always dreamed about. A life filled with dancing.
Aisha set out to find the perfect place to open her dance studio. It couldn’t be just any old place. It had to be centrally located and close to the public transportation line because, the young girls she had identified to be her future students would be mostly from the inner city neighborhoods and transportation for those girls would be practically non-existent if she didn’t choose the right area.
“Miss Carlisle, I believe you’ll love this piece of property. It’s ideal for what you’re trying to accomplish.” The realtor used his most convincing voice to sell Aisha on the 3,600 square foot space. Aisha’s excitement grew by the minute. She felt a mixture of exhaustion and exhilaration at the thought of her dream coming into fruition. A-Carlisle Studio of Dance and Choreography. What a nice ring.
“Right this way, Miss Carlisle. I believe you’ll agree with me when I say this property simply exudes an upscale style and quality. As you can see the decor of mahogany, marble and bronze sets it apart from the ordinary business space. “
“I like it so far. This just might have potential.”
“Ma’am, it’s ideally located at the focal point of the city.” She followed the realtor into the mammoth open space. This was it. She felt it. She had seen over two dozen properties in the past three weeks. This building was the first place that had sparked her interest. The realtor continued to make his sales pitch.
“There’s a full service business center adjacent to this property.”
“Is the business center accessible at any time?” she asked.
“Yes, you’ll have access to the property twenty four hours a day, seven days a week. There are full utility and janitorial services, free parking, a reception and conference area.”
“When was it built?”
“This property is only ten years old, Miss Carlisle, which is an added plus.”
She immediately fell in love with it.
“Let’s walk over to the window,” the realtor continued. “This view provides a relaxing atmosphere and helps to remove claustrophobic tendencies. The atrium and courtyard gardens are beautifully landscaped, as you can see. You’ll have full access to the courtyards as well. So, what do you think so far?”
“I’d like to know what they’re asking. I mean, I like what I have seen so far and it does seem like it could be the ideal place.”
“For twenty-six hundred dollars a month you can lease this prestigious business address with an option to buy and without the inconvenience of downtown traffic and parking.” When he finally took a moment to rest from his spiel, Aisha was already sold.
“I love it. I absolutely love it!” She couldn’t hold back her emotions much longer. She knew within her spirit that this was the place for her studio. In her twenty-four years she had learned how to discern the will of God and what was coming from Satan and his schemes. It wasn’t that she was self-righteous, but she was brought up in the church and in some form of bible study since she was a toddler, so scriptures and the teachings of God were almost second nature to her. She couldn’t imagine making any major decision without prayer and sometimes fasting. Now she was at another milestone - owning her on studio. She couldn’t begin to thank God enough for all of his blessings.
“I really believe this is the place I’m supposed to have,” she explained to the realtor. “It’s everything I’ve been looking for and then some. This is what I’d like to do.”
“What is that, Miss Carlisle?”
“By the way, call me Aisha. I’m going to sleep on it and then give you a call tomorrow. If the Holy Spirit is still pushing me toward this direction, then I’ll sign the papers and give you one year’s rent plus the deposit. How does that sound?”
“No problem at all, Miss Carlisle…Aisha.”
“Well, tomorrow it is.” Aisha extended her nicely manicured hand out to meet his.
“I’ll look forward to hearing from you tomorrow. In the meantime, if you have any questions or concerns, please just give me a call.”
♦
“Mom, Dad. I found the perfect place for my dance studio! You have to see it.” Aisha couldn’t contain her excitement. She paced the room with joy as she told them everything the realtor had told her about the property. .
“Mom, why don’t you go with me tomorrow to take a look at it?”
“Aisha, I’d love to, but tomorrow’s not a good time. Your half-sister is supposed to be here tomorrow. Maybe you should ask her to go with you.” Selena was born to Benjamin Carlisle and his high school sweetheart, Yvette. The two of them rushed to get married when Yvette discovered that she was pregnant. When Selena was three and a half years old, Benjamin met Aisha’s mother, Sandra, at Minority Marketplace Expo. She was perusing the aisles with a couple of co-workers when she stopped at Benjamin’s company’s booth. She eyed the array of African American history books and literature he had set up before she lingered on the tall, handsome, dark haired man with hypnotizing eyes standing behind the booth. Though it was completely out of character for Sandra, she openly flirted with him. Needless to say, he reveled in the much needed attention she showered on him. He certainly wasn’t getting any attention at home. She purchased The Souls of Black Folk and along with the money for the book, she gave him her business card. Ignoring the gold wedding ring on his long finger, Sandra consciously set out to make him hers. And within two years, she’d gotten what she wanted. Mesmerized by Sandra’s beguiling charm, Benjamin filed for divorce from Yvette. Rejected, hurt and destroyed Yvette took Selena and moved to Detroit to be close to her family and far away from Benjamin.
Aisha was disappointed when her mother told her she couldn’t go with her to see the building. Though she’d gotten pretty used to her mother’s excuses not to be around her, she never stopped trying. “How long is Selena going to be here anyway?” Aisha asked her mother.
“Your sister is coming to visit her cousins on her mother’s side and I think your father said she’s going to be here for at least three or four days. Maybe the two of you can catch up on what’s going on in each of your lives since you never really talk to each other very much.”
“Mom, you know Selena and I have never been close. She was raised in Michigan and we’ve been in Memphis all of our lives. Now Selena and I are both adults and you know she’s so much older than I am.
“Honey, she’s still your father’s child which means she’s your sister and the two of you ought to be closer than you are.”
“It’s not my fault that we live hundreds of miles apart, Mom.” Aisha felt herself becoming defensive. Her mother always managed to somehow twist things around when she wanted to avoid talking about something. This time she managed to cleverly switch the conversation from talking about Aisha’s
dance studio to the distant relationship she had with Selena. “Mom, please I was really hoping you could come and see the building.”
“I have a full work load this week, Aisha.” Sandra became silent and looked like she was in deep thought. “I tell you what, maybe I can squeeze in a half an hour or so sometime around the lunch hour. But I’m telling you, I can’t spend a lot of time from the office tomorrow, I have a huge case file of clients to finish certifying and then I have to have all of them entered into the computer system by the end of the week.”
“Okay, lunch time would be great. I had already planned to check out some dance equipment and office furniture first thing in the morning anyway, so I can meet you after that. Oh, mom, I can’t believe this is happening. I’m going to have my own dance studio with my very own students. Oh, there is something else that I have to do.”
“Slow down child. What do you have to do?” Her daddy asked.
I have to start contacting the people who answered my newspaper ad about dance lessons. I received a lot of positive phone calls about it. I’m going to start calling some of them back and see what kind of interest they really have in dance. Once I secure my building, I’m going to host an open house for potential students, family, friends and everybody!”
“Sounds like you have everything worked out, sweetie,” her daddy said smiling at his baby girl. “I’m proud of you.” He walked over to her and kissed her on the forehead. “I think I’m going to leave you and your mother to yourselves. I have some paperwork to review before I head back to the office.
Benjamin adored Aisha and there was nothing he wouldn’t do for his youngest daughter. Unlike Selena, he had seen Aisha grow up from a little girl to a beautiful young woman. He was aware that Sandra had her moments of jealousy, but Aisha was his little girl, the pride and joy of his life and he didn’t want her to grow up doubting his love for her, like Selena often did; even though it wasn’t Selena’s fault. He often blamed himself. As her father, he should have made more of an effort to see her and communicate with her, even though her crazy momma did everything she could do to make it impossible for him to have a relationship with his oldest daughter. She didn’t have a problem cashing his child support checks every month, but whenever he tried to see Selena, it had to be on her terms and her terms alone. Those terms turned out to be a week every now and then in the summer. He and Selena had a decent relationship now that she was an adult because she finally understood that her father wasn’t entirely to blame for their fragile relationship. But Selena still harbored her share of envy at the exceptionally close relationship he had with Aisha.
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