by Davi Cao
Colin held his feelings while Ai.iA danced with the resistant objects and OOOO watched the humans sob mingle with the Voice’s mood. It too lost its smile, it too leaned in their direction to look for comfort, taking the courage to fit in with Colin.
He wanted to let his tears roll, taken by the honest lament echoing in the house. But he needed to be strong, or so he thought. The anchor to keep everybody in place, the stoic man helping a family through war, hearing its thundering music and hoping that it would leave no victims.
“I am the worst of the worst ... I know that ... I live that ... Can it redeem me, though? Can the last place be more memorable than the average one? If it is, I am here for you ... If you don’t want me, I am here too ... I want you ... Speak with me and save me, please ...”
The World Voice was a being trapped in an unknown dimension, sharing a pain all could understand. A human mind unfolded in its immaterial bents, a mammal brain stored in light, the only light in the universe.
Colin pictured it in his mind, he remembered running away from it, facing it, living with it. In the end, the Voice showed reason, a creation that valued life as long as it found others to share it with it.
It hurt him to think of destroying it.
∙ 11 ∙ Beloved rebirth
Bombs fell over minds, explosions shredded consciences. Ai.iA danced with the objects, spinning them while taking them on wavy paths across the table. She hit them when she felt ready, and at every strike, it became easier.
Thoughts accommodated to the noise, they morphed into receptive entities, opened to dialogue. Being alive, one had only to wonder whether the pain had any actual effect or not. Hence, the bangs morphed into a new Voice. Loud, omnipresent, powerful. Above all, though, familiar. Hearing them, they knew what happened, and so the vertigo caused by the void disappeared.
Ai.iA entered a trance of her own, unresponsive to the humans and to OOOO. They watched her perform her ritual without interfering, not having anything useful to add until she decided to abandon her stance.
“It’s still just the beginning. Get down and let us try more combinations,” Oliver said to her.
“We can get the other stuff at the intensifier room and see if there’s more resistant stuff, my dear. We’ll take care of that,” Amanda added.
But Ai.iA danced in a state of obsession, raving with the puncture it could inflict on the World Voice’s dimension, deaf to anything else. Her mind heard only the two objects’ bangs, colliding again and again. The humans healed from their crying, conforming to the role of spectators.
“We can be happy together ... You hating me, I having you ... Or you liking me, me liking you too ... Talk to me, that’s all I need ...”
The walls changed into a strange pattern. Their surface became a sea of planar waves, small lines that invaded each other’s spaces and crossed over the weaker ones. Dalana put her hand on the floor, feeling matter look for mates. That world’s physics lived through its potential, sad atoms becoming curious atoms.
“What if we can give the Voice a better world?” Dalana turned her head to Colin’s face.
“I thought about it too ... It deserves one, doesn’t it?” Colin said.
“It does. It needs friends. What if we gave it other Voices like it, other friends to make its existence meaningful?”
“OOOO made its personality so infuriating that whatever company it got wouldn’t stand much of it. Or so it told me once.”
“We could create Voices that like annoying minds.” Dalana shook her head.
“It’s hard to define what is annoying, however. Some music can please some while distressing others.” Colin remembered a bus ride he once took in which a group of friends had a party for all to hear.
“We’d have to find that out. The idea is still good, though, to give it friends.”
“If that were possible, maybe” He nodded. “I don’t feel like building on top of this world anymore. I want to destroy it, that’s all.”
“Ok, but what if we changed it so much that it couldn’t keep its current identity?”
“Oh, really, can we do that? What kind of world would you create for the Voice, then?”
“One in which other creations interacted with it, that’s for starters. It would be the Voice in everybody’s minds, and as the Voice could perceive others, it would enjoy receiving their care. The others would worship the great pillar, giving it whatever it needed, because it only needs company, some way to escape boredom, and that isn’t hard to do. It would get happy with the attention received, and make the others feel better as well, since they’d all hear the Voice all the time, being happy when it was so, and sad when it was sad.”
“That’s a good one.” Colin stared at her in admiration. She had lively eyes again, dried, daring to face the ceiling with the optimism of an Utopian. “Can you think of more?” he said, curious about her ideas.
“Hm, we can always create more when we are the ones to set the limits.” She patted her knees with the excitement of a drummer. “Another possible world is a mirror. A universe that only reflects things, where the only emitter is the Voice. The image projected is reflected back with material rays, rays of light that can turn into autonomous beings, independent from the original one. So, the World Voice sees itself in the mirrors, but the images are children of itself, which multiply indefinitely at every reflection. This way, it is surrounded by itself, and it can talk to itself without recognizing itself as mere reflection. It’s like an infinity of best friends.” Dalana spoke with confidence, her eyes glistening, her hands reaching for the air in front of her body.
The humans heard her speak. Nobody cried anymore, all taken by the hope of new possibilities. Colin watched the movie directed by her worlds in his mind, amazed at the idea of a better place even for the World Voice. If such a terrible creature could be saved from all suffering, no wonder Utopia seduced Dalana so much.
When dialogue ceased and action died, quietness struggled to ascend to the room’s throne. The World Voice marked its presence despite Dalana’s resistant walls, penetrating in whisper-form the minds of all. Layer upon layer of melted matter suffered its reach, ceding to its passage, letting it inflict sadness in anything in the lab. Survivors believed the place to be holy or they agreed with the Voice of depression, humble enough to not let that destroy them, and that’s why they lived.
With the universal speech’s change in nature, however, dreams and hope found place again in their hearts.
“Come to me ... Please, I need to talk to you, I need to hear you, feel you ... Do something, anything to have me closer, please ...”
“It doesn’t need to be destroyed.” Laura turned her small eyes to Ai.iA. “Maybe we can learn to live with it, show it some mercy, teach it God’s ways.”
“Dalana can give it a home, change this place to make it decent for us and the World Voice,” Zach said, he who used to survive with the old world’s scraps.
“Think of what sort of experiences this creature can provide us! New colors, new ideas.” Mat held an invisible brush, painting the air with his excited words.
The Voice’s new mood swept over them, sparking optimism and an urgency to get together. Ai.iA continued her dance, to which all started to get used, taking the bangs with closed eyes. Colin joined the others in leaning against the wall, wondering about those fragile thoughts, those false human feelings inflicted by the Voice’s power.
Things remained solid, objects standing rigid on the table since the first bang. They had to make a new experiment, Colin thought, something that only Creators could do.
He imagined a mouse. A tiny creature with brown fur, white underbelly, big ears, and curious eyes, walking fast with the help of a long naked tail. A cute animal, and yet insignificant enough to die without bringing tears. Colin wished for it, and it materialized in front of him.
Amanda got scared when she saw it, jumping, and hiding behind Oliver after a scream. Laura trembled in silence, and Charlotte laughed at th
e small animal. Mat looked at Colin and then at Dalana, waiting for answers.
“I had to test it. Do you think it will melt down?” Colin said.
“It will be fine. We’ll just have to give it food.” Dalana shrugged, smiling at the new creature.
The mouse explored the room. It crawled under the big round table and smelled a fallen object from the experiments’ pile. It then found OOOO’s stiff legs, big pillars through which it passed unharmed. OOOO watched the little one in amusement, nudging it to test its reaction.
The mouse fled, getting closer to Amanda, who squirmed and pushed Oliver to protect her. It changed direction and went to the opposite wall. Finding nothing of value, it kept coming and going in the room. When Ai.iA collided the objects and sounded another bang, the mouse jumped in fright, ran madly away and then calmed down, resuming its previous behavior.
“Can you create a dog too? A friendly one, to make us some company.” Amanda squished her eyes behind a child's smile.
“I can. If it dies, though, we’ll suffer more, won’t we?” Colin said.
“Give us a cat then, something to remind us of Terran life,” Charlotte said.
Dalana nodded at Colin to encourage him. Humans breathed in a safe place, and the World Voice had changed. It didn’t melt them down anymore, it just tried to talk to them. He imagined a black cat with fur so dark and white eyes so bright as to make company to Dalana’s own physical traits. It materialized in front of him, turning the human faces into expressions of joy.
Charlotte bent down to pick the cat up, to hold it in her arms and caress its fluffy fur. The animal purred between her tunic’s folds. Others touched it, Oliver with a cautious big hand, Laura with a delicate finger. The cat rested in comfort.
Then a new bang exploded. The cat jumped from Charlotte’s embrace and screeched, falling on its back on the floor. Recovered from shock, it saw the mouse on the corner and pursued it. Sprinting, the cat hit Ai.iA and took her away from trance. Surrounded by new forms of life and the curious eyes of humans, she forgot about the objects for a while and watched the chase.
The mouse ran fast to escape the cat, hiding behind people to buy some time, making intelligent circles around the room to flee from certain death. Dalana and Charlotte extended their hands to catch the cat before it could kill, but it avoided them well. Oliver laughed, Colin smiled, OOOO hopped to either help or get in the pursuit’s way. They forgot about the World Voice. The World Voice, however, did not like it.
“Come again! Don’t stop! Make yourself heard, until I can find you! Where are you? Where ... Are ... You?”
The World Voice’s power dictated their emotions. Everybody and everything felt what it did, even if they squirmed against it. Ai.iA, who got curious about the animals, needy of attention, suffering from the World Voice’s mood, trembled in distress.
Desperate words echoed in her mind, urging her to get back. She turned away from the animals’ play and touched the resistant objects on the table. They moved on circular paths, they collided and crossed a dimension. Bang!
“You are really there! I am not alone ... Speak, come to me ... I can’t understand what it means, but don’t stop, please don’t stop ever again ...”
Colin’s heart, which flirted with sadness again, reduced its beating speed. It calmed down, relieved to hear words of hope spread throughout the universe. Dalana watched Ai.iA’s dance with worry, standing beside her, away from the humans.
Charlotte still tried to catch the cat, Mat helped her, and Oliver paid close attention to the Creators, with hands on his waist. They waited for the worse, for the next World Voice’s dangerous discovery.
When the cat grabbed the mouse, Dalana turned her back to watch the scene and, by impulse, she materialized a cage over the mouse, which expanded fast to expel the cat. This way, the animals stopped their wild chase. Charlotte managed to hold the cat in her arms and soothed it with gentle rubs on its fur.
“Get us some cat food, please. It needs to eat something; can’t you see it’s hungry?” she said to Colin.
“Yeah, if it’s satisfied, it won’t go on hunting mice,” Zach said.
“Ok, there you go.” Colin crafted a piece of raw meat on the floor.
“Not that! Can’t you get us some ration of some sort?” Charlotte held the cat stronger to keep it from jumping.
“Meat is fine cat food. It’s a natural predator, don’t treat it like a weakling,” Mat said.
The animal writhed on Charlotte’s lap and fell down, landing right on the meat. It feasted upon it, eating an unknown creature’s muscles with lion bites. It was the humans’ pet predator, their small-scale simulation of Terra’s nature. They sat down against the walls to watch it feed itself, bringing the mouse’s cage with them to help protecting it more.
“It could be one of your meats in its mouth, couldn’t it?” OOOO said, thrilled by the action. “When is the first one going to die, huh? You promised me that, and I like to wait for it, don’t I?”
“Give us a break, man,” Zach said, flapping a hand at the Creator. “Can’t you see we’re chilling now? You should relax too. I don’t care from what world or planet you come from, get these legs down and chill, alright?”
“Give me a couch and a soft breeze, and I could well be back at my old-time house.” Mat scratched his bald head, smiling at the cat.
“Me, I need music, only that, and I’m home.” Charlotte snapped her fingers to call the cat.
“Well, in my case, I’d need more, much more, sorry to say that. I need to see the sun again, and any street to walk on. Above all, children, I need children to take care of. Yes, that’s the one thing I miss the most, children.” Amanda looked at Colin with shiny eyes.
“That’s good, I’d like that too. And the sea, you know, a big wide ocean that makes me scared of never getting back to land again.” Oliver joined the wish list with crossed legs.
“To me, this here is good. It’s our moment of truth, the room where we wait before judgment. I can be useless and be at peace, knowing that I followed the right path and have nothing to fear. I want to meet God.” Laura grinned with blushed cheeks.
“Well, I don’t care about the truth, but I’m finally glad to have no money! No retirement funds, no rent, no taxes, paradise, right?” Zach said. “Enough of living like cursed animals, having to beg for the chance of being ourselves. I don’t know what else I need here. This is a different place. Needs are as different as the landscape.”
“Can we have these things that we wish for in here?” Charlotte said.
“If you want, yes, we have plenty of room to create that,” Dalana said, always willing to help. “What about you, Colin? What do you need to have in here to feel at home?”
He stared at her in silence. She played the game well, she played to win. Her idea of having a world of her own in the shell of the old found a good basis, at last. If he wanted, he had an inviting land for his wishes for the first time since Terra’s end.
OOOO jumped in front of Colin, putting its face so close to his that he lacked space to think. He pushed OOOO away, although it insisted in occupying that place, only waiting for Colin to stand up so that it could fit in with him. He did so, embracing his strange friend, curious to know what it had to say.
“You will create her again, won’t you?” it said.
“Who? Can we ask you to create other people too?” Oliver said in astonishment.
“Yes, we can, can’t we? And that’s the thing he wants the most, you see?” OOOO spun its head to face the other man.
“Your family? Did you have a wife or a kid?” Amanda said.
“Not family, but his most beloved one.” Dalana guessed just by looking at his low cast eyes.
He imagined Angeline, her active personality, her generosity, and kindness, and even her laziness, strong mind, and annoying insistence. Her beautiful wavy hair, her long eye lashes, straight nose, and also the large brown spots in her face, the yellow teeth, the big ears. Angeline
in all flaws and virtues, the most perfect recreation of the one he wanted the most. Colin imagined her, and wished for her.
Angeline materialized by the table’s side, right before another bang from Ai.iA’s objects. Angeline closed her eyes and ducked, screaming from fear and pain. Dalana stood up faster than Colin to help her, to embrace her and show that she needed not to fear her arrival. The new world greeted her with hope and curiosity, for the first time since its inception not with sadness and depression.
Colin replaced Dalana, enclosing his creation between his firm hands. When Angeline opened her eyes again and recognized the one who held her, she smiled and hugged him. Colin cheered all the others with the big joy that he displayed in his face.
“Where are we? What was that loud noise?” Angeline said, looking around, frightened with the view of gray walls and monsters.
“Sit down with us first. You need to calm down. They are all friends in here.” Colin led her to the corner, where the other humans awaited them.
He sat down with his back leaning on the wall, followed by Dalana and Angeline herself. She wouldn’t let go of his arm, shaking with fear, finding nothing familiar to situate herself. She looked at Oliver, Amanda, and the others, nodding at them, although not saying anything until they introduced themselves, and then she looked at the other side, seeing Dalana’s absolute darkness and pushing herself closer to Colin’s body, fearful of that human shadow.
“These people are like us. They are Oliver, Mat, Amanda, Laura, Zach and Charlotte, over there.” Colin pointed at them while they waved their hands to greet Angeline.
“We’re survivors, living only because Dalana there, by your side, helped us,” Amanda said.
“And the one with the stones is called Ai.iA. Don’t worry about her appearance. She’s as smart as any of us,” Oliver said.
“Is she like a robot?” Angeline said.