“No, you’re not! It’s to be a joint effort! We’ll both be co-editors, Emma!” Rachael returned, taking a firm stand on the matter, while laughing. “I dare say, I do not want you to shoulder all of that responsibility alone.” Glancing at her driver, Rachael saw John smile, which made her ever more confident. Her heart beat faster at the joy this day had brought, as their eventful carriage ride began.
“Within moments we shall be safely home, Miss Hathaway, long before this storm turns ugly again. The celebrating shall continue, which seems only fitting for this Easter season and Phoebe’s visit,” John reported, trying to reassure Rachael, although she didn’t appear nervous. Her pretty smile proved that. He winked and wished he had time to study her beautiful face, searching for clues of her true feelings for him. Yet, the horses needed his expertise just now. He soon realized that he was happy today, in many ways, plus, he could hardly wait to present his latest surprise to her, while wondering what her reaction would be. John hoped it would be a favorable one.
Consequently, halfway home he pulled his carriage to the right side of the road and motioned for his cousin and the pastor to drive by, which they did with a friendly wave. John had something special in mind and the weather was perfect; sunny and warm now. It had actually mellowed. Rainfall had ceased. Dappled sunlight shone through emerging new leaves upon the oaks and dogwood trees. White trilliums, scattered throughout the woods, bloomed in their annual springtime show, like bright beacons.
“It is said that when the oak leaves are the size of a squirrel’s ear, it’s springtime, Rachael,” he declared, taking in a deep breath, relishing the warmer air.
Directly, she let her fur coat fall from her shoulders. “I’ve heard that, also, but what’s wrong? Did we forget something?” she asked, wondering what could possibly flaw this perfectly wonderful day, besides weather.
“Nothing at all,” was his reply. “Wait just a moment.”
A large stand of oak trees graced a stream nearby, where ducks and geese swam, some proudly watching their young ones. It was a peaceful setting, for now. Yet, that was soon to change. Rachael enjoyed the restful scenery and surroundings, so quiet after the day’s exciting events. She pointed out small ducklings gathering near their mothers, causing ripples in the calm water.
It was then she saw him, a fine figure of a man, fishing the shallows. It absolutely took her breath away. Could it possibly be him? No, of course it wasn’t. Yet, she didn’t dare say a word about him to John. For now, his presence would remain a secret, until she could somehow speak to the angler, know if it was really him, hug him if it was, and welcome him back into her life. Still, he was so far from Bower. What could he possibly be doing here? Or was she wrong? Was it someone else?
“Rachael,” John began in a rather quiet tone, breaking the silence, causing her to gaze upon him, once again. “I fear that I must go away for awhile, once more. So, now that the others have passed by us, I have a gift for you. It’s something you can think about while I am away at my duties.”
“Oh?” He caught her by surprise. What could he possibly be referring to, she wondered?
Unfortunately, a feeling of dread set in at speaking of it, for he was not at all certain she would accept his bold offering so soon. He watched her open the recent purchase Crane had picked up for him.
At once, her mouth dropped open. “Oh,” was her only reply, since she was having difficulty concentrating on John and his gift, now that she had seen the man in the woods.
“I didn’t know of this upcoming trip, I assure you. Monty only advised me of it this afternoon. So, tell me what you think of this, please, darling.”
“What? You’re leaving again?” she asked, somewhat dismayed that he was leaving, and at pulling her attention away from the surprise found in the woods and the one in the box. As she lifted the lid, her gaze suddenly fell upon something beautiful.
“It’s just a transition meeting with some railroad people. We were asked to attend, and it should be a short one.” He tried to reassure her. “You’ll have your sister with you, and I’ll hurry home to you.”
“Yes, of course. Oh, John, the dress is absolutely gorgeous. Yet, I can hardly accept it, for we are not betrothed. Why on earth did you buy a formal dress? Did you assume that I would accept it, willingly? I didn’t expect it, for I have no intentions of marrying soon, and I was ever so shocked by Phoebe’s visit today, and not at the holidays. I’m rambling, for I am at a loss for words.” She eyed the creamy material and ran her hand over it. “This is so luxurious and expensive. My sister and I will have a wonderful visit, though, I know, for I’ve missed Phoebe dreadfully.” Her thoughts were torn between her family and this dress he was offering. What choice did she have? She turned serious, shooting a fleeting glance at the fisherman, trying not to let John know that she had spied someone there. Surprisingly, the angler was still fishing the same spot. Gathering her thoughts, she asked, “How short is that railroad meeting?”
“I shall make it short, and Rachael, I bought this dress because I love you. I am completely captivated by your honesty, charm, and devotion to Lily.”
“I shall certainly have to think about accepting such an expensive gift, though, sir.” She reverted to a formality by using ‘sir.’ I have nothing to give you in return, not even a promise of matrimony.” She broke the news while wondering if it made a difference to him.
“It has long sleeves, so it can be worn in any kind of weather or season. I’ll wait. The red lace we can change to white.”
“That’s very thoughtful of you.”
“I am thinking ahead, Rachael.” Suddenly, he was preoccupied, watching his team, as he changed the subject, allowing her time to ponder his gift and wedding plan. “I wonder where my other horses are.”
“How short will this meeting be, or long, days or a week? I ask the question again, yet really feel I have no right to do so, except for my concern that Lily will miss you, and my own conviction that she not become too sad again. Furthermore, what am I to do about this wedding dress you took the liberty of purchasing?”
“Keep it, and wear it someday. Consider it an investment in our future together. I would say three days maximum, I’ll be gone,” were his replies. He was staring into her eyes now, hopeful of a favorable sign from this woman he adored.
“Well, that’s not long. I think we can manage with her while you are away, now that she has her dolly, if that is a concern to you. My sister loves children, too. She is going to become a teacher, someday, I believe.”
“I am more interested in you and what you will do. Lily’s not a concern, Rachael. I know you will take good care of her until I return, but, also, please get some rest. I only hope you don’t mind me calling you by your first name, since you called me by mine in the presence of others today. Thank you for that, and for using our secret word. We have so much history together already. That’s exactly why I purchased the wedding gown for you now, instead of waiting. Let’s plan our wedding.”
“Yes, we do have some things in common, and memories of time spent together. But this is premature.” She glanced away, yet, to her dismay, the fisherman was gone.
“What did that mean when you called me not by my surname, Rachael? You know I love you. ”
“Oh, it was nothing. I took your hand today, too, at the picnic and on the bridge,” she laughed gaily. “That was only in friendship, in fun.” However, when she turned back to him after surveying the little ducklings again, he wasn’t laughing or smiling. In fact, he was hanging his head in silence. “Are you hurt, or embarrassed by my actions, sir?” she wondered out loud, knowing they had discussed missions and so many other things. She did feel close to him in some ways.
“Friendship, my foot, and don’t call me ‘sir,’ because never before have I had a lady grab my hand to include me so unexpectedly, except for …” He stopped just short of saying ‘my wife.’
; She knew he was upset. “I’m sorry. It’s difficult for me to think of my employer as more, John.”
“I am neither hurt nor embarrassed by your actions, only amazed by my good fortune at finding you for Lily’s nanny, the woman I love, and you needn’t say you’re sorry.” He smiled sincerely. “I’m trying to hide an aching heart, wishing you would miss me some while I’m away.”
“That reminds me to discuss the household expenditures. Will there be anything I should pay or do while you are away this time?” She wanted to get her instructions completely clear, and understand his wishes before he left again.
“We’ll discuss that later. You are doing a fine job with them, and I won’t be leaving for a day or two. Monty will accompany me, and I’ll ask Pastor Hoover and Emma to look in on you and Lily. Everything will be fine, but let’s talk about us.”
“It will. I don’t doubt that,” she replied. “It will be fun to have Minnie and Quinny visit.”
Suddenly, he took her left hand in his. Kissing it, he stared at her. “I think Lily will do fine. What I’d really like to know is, may I kiss you?”
Caught off guard, she replied, “I don’t know.”
“I’m a gentleman, but I want to prove my affection and adoration for you. Furthermore, I was extremely proud of you when you proposed the newspaper today.”
“Thank you. I felt there was a need.”
“There is. I need you.”
Taking Rachael into his arms, without permission, he asked again if he might kiss her. She agreed. For one brief moment, he thought she had kissed him back, lovingly
Not surprisingly, though, she pulled away rather quickly. Next, she stared into the woods, wondering where the fisherman had gone. “Those are beautiful flowers, aren’t they,” she whispered, changing the subject.
“I’m sorry. I was out of line. Yes, they are beautiful, just like you. I can picture you with one of those flowers in your hair on our wedding day.” He decided to address the issue which was foremost on his mind, directly. “When can our life together begin?”
Rachael did not know what to say or how to respond. Slowly, she addressed his question. “Our life together has already begun. I’m here with you, aren’t I? I live in your home, tend to your child. The others are probably waiting, John. Furthermore, I do not believe you were out of line.” She smiled, shyly.
A silence engulfed them; finally, he asked her what was wrong.
“You’re going away; I guess that’s what’s wrong. It pains my heart. I believe I find it preposterous that you would buy me a wedding gown when you do not intend to spend time with me, and that I may wear a flower in my hair when I wed, if I do, but you won’t explain your trips to me.”
He was thrilled by her comments, since they made him feel confident that he could ease her mind. Smiling lovingly, he continued. “Oh, Rachael, my going away has absolutely nothing to do with my feelings for you. If I had my way, I’d skip this meeting entirely and never leave you, or take you with me. Yet, I happen to feel that it is a very important one, perhaps even for our future. So, I should go, or should I stay, for I do wish to spend more time with you? Please decide for me.”
“I can’t do that.” She thought about the situation for a moment. “I’m certain it is important, and I understand, so you must go.” Running her fingers over the fabric in the long dress, Rachael felt a thrill. “This dress could really be mine, for my wedding, yet should it be?”
“Yes.” He took her hand again. “I wish that with all my heart. I also wish I could take you with me, but we would have to be man and wife first, wouldn’t we, and I wish for that, too? In fact, that was my wish at the bridge today. Yet, I believed it was a little too soon to ask you. Still, it was not too soon to give you your wedding gown, I felt, judging by your actions. At least it may keep me on your mind.”
“That was your wish ~ that we would marry? I dare say, I am amazed, yet, not quite certain how I feel about your gift and proposal. But, do you love me? Do I love you? How does one know for certain, John? I can’t ask Mother about this, for how would she know what’s right for me?”
“You’ll know, darling, as I do. Yes, honestly, that was my wish today. May I kiss you again?”
She liked that about him. He usually asked first. “Well, shouldn’t we be going?” she asked, frankly, somewhat nervously, still smiling, since she had used their secret word. “The others will wonder, won’t they?” She felt she could speak her mind with him, sometimes.
“No,” was his firm answer, just like the night at the table. “We should not be going. I wish to kiss you, Rachael. The others can wait. We need to settle this. So, please reconsider whether we may kiss.”
“Don’t you think you are too demanding, sir?” She handed him back the gift box.
His disappointment was apparent, as his shoulders dropped. “The others are friends. They know we’ll be with them shortly. They’ll be having a lively conversation by now, or checking out the gardens or eating. The children will be playing. We need to be in our own ecstasy here, for now, Rachael.”
“You make it sound so simple.”
“It is, and all is well with them. What about us? I agree. I am demanding at times, for asking for a kiss or two. I am forward in giving you the wedding gown. I know that. But, please, forgive, keep it, and I shall try to change my demanding ways.”
“All is well with us, too. Well, I mean, I like my job and residing at Magnolia Gardens. I believe your daughter likes me well enough now to stay with me, unperturbed. Still, I am uncertain about keeping such an expensive gift as this, John, from a man.”
“Rachael, I am not just any man, for I plan to be your husband. I’m asking, in particular, about your heart and your mind, sweetheart, since I heard your song about a wedding devotion that you wrote for us. Your singing of it compelled me to order this dress. I haven’t seen it, however. I only had the clerk read the descriptions of several to me, and then I made a choice, since I am not to see it ahead of time. I know that much. The market sent for it. Crane picked it up from the clerk at church. Please know that I was completely enthralled that evening when you sang the song. I wanted to knock on your door.”
“Oh, John, there is a mistake. I must explain, for, I dare say, there has not been much time to think about my own feelings. Yet, I do have some very exciting news on the subject, however,” she gushed, since a pleasant memory flashed into her mind. She could barely contain herself for wanting to share the news about Miss Mariah and Crane’s upcoming wedding and explain the singing of her song.
“What is it?” he asked, genuinely interested, waiting for her to explain further, as he handed her the box once again. Would she accept it this time, he wondered?
“I think I’m sworn to secrecy.” She did accept the box from him again and placed it in her lap.
He glanced away. “Oh, it’s not about you, or us? The song was for someone else in your life?”
“No, it isn’t. It’s about …”
“You are simply changing the subject, Rachael.” he confirmed, quietly, yet firmly.
“No, I’m not. Well, I did not mean to, or maybe I did. You’re confusing me today, John.”
“I don’t mean to confuse you, only to pledge my love. Can you tell me this secret of yours?”
“Not now. It’s not mine to tell, anyway.” Rachael was rather enjoying this conversation, but should she tell him about the newly engaged and their wedding plans or not, she wondered? Should I keep this dress?
“When will you tell me, Miss Hathaway?” He used a formal tone to see just where he stood and what her reaction would be.
“John, I’ll tell you when you return,” she informed him, firmly, defiantly using his first name now.
He chuckled. “What other secrets do you have? Will I learn those when I return, also.”
“I have none. This one was just told to me rece
ntly, and I am delighted, of course.”
Now he raised her chin so she was looking directly into his eyes. “Rachael, I don’t care how many secrets you have. I only want you to be happy, and I do hope, of course, that your happiness will be with me. However, if your wedding song is for someone else, I shall let you go.”
“No. You don’t understand. Something in me fears for you to be gone.” Why had she said that?
“You will be safe,” he gently assured her, taking her right hand to kiss tenderly.
“Oh, it’s not about me that I have fear. It’s about you, Dr. Davis” she confided. Then, she knew that she would have to explain further. Confused, she continued. “I do not wish to embarrass you.”
“Rachael, I’m not leaving until I have some answers about all of this, and your fears. Nothing you can tell me will embarrass me. I shall be very understanding.”
“Forgive me for speaking about this, but I think perhaps your leg has not healed completely yet.”
He paused for a moment, astounded. “Is that what this is all about? I believe you are correct. However, it is getting better. But how would you know about my leg, Rachael? You haven’t seen it. I want the truth. Are Monty and Buddy informing you about things behind my back?”
“No, of course they are not. I guess I could defer and say I’m a psychic, but I’d be lying to you,” she laughed. “I mean well, really.”
“I’m delighted by your use of our word ‘well.’ But tell me the whole truth, please. I can take it.”
“Crane,” was all that she managed to say.
“Crane? Are you in love with Crane? Was your song for him?”
“No, and yes. The other night they became engaged.” The secret slipped out before she knew it.
“Oh, Rachael, is that the secret? Tell me more.” He was overjoyed, grinning, happy that he had finally learned the truth, so very unexpectedly. He put his arm around her, drawing her close.
She did not resist his affections. “He and Miss Mariah are to wed. They asked that I write a wedding song.”
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