Chapter Seventeen
FANGS
I, Eloise the Magnificent, had a plan. My first plan of seducing Oliver with cupcakes had worked like a charm, so I thought, why not try out another one? I was good with plans. I was a very detailed oriented kind of gal, which made my plans all the greater. This particular plan was full of details. I had it broken down into stages. Accomplishing minor tasks helped build up to accomplishing the overall goal. The goal being getting nerdy beefcake between my sheets tonight. Oliver could have his own plans, for all I knew. When I sent him a text to confirm the time, he simply replied with a
“see ya then, cupcake.”
So, I officially had no clue as to what his intentions were for the evening, but I knew very well about mine.
Stage One: Sex up my style.
I was pretty well-known for rocking the quirky girl look, but I could be a vixen when I wanted. I too owned a pair of hoochie boots. I simply chose not to unleash them on every random soul walking down the street like Sloan. I enjoyed the element of surprise.
Stage two: Butter Oliver up with food.
That was a given. If it wasn’t not broke, don’t fix it, right? I would have him eating out of my hand or off my body, one way or another. That would essentially lead straight into stage three.
The doorbell rang, and I practically jumped out of my panties. I took one last look in the mirror.
Sexy, low cut black sweater.
Check.
Butt cleavage leather mini.
Check.
I swung the door open, thirsting to see my nerdilicious perfection. I squeezed my legs together and bit my lip in preparation before throwing the door open.
“Hello, Elle.”
I stood there. I just stood there. In the place of my oh-so-perfect nerd stood…a cowboy. I was so confused. It was definitely Oliver. His piercing blue eyes still bored into me as he ran his fingers through those soft brown locks. However, there were no skinny jeans, and most importantly, there were no black-rimmed glasses. Instead there were blue jeans, a plaid shirt, and boots.
Cowboy boots.
I blinked. Something had gone terribly wrong. Had it finally happened? Had Sloan taken over the world and followed through on her threat to pass a “cowboy all day every day” law?
He noticed my utter confusion and smirked at me. Did he think this was some kind of joke? Because it wasn’t funny.
It was not funny at all.
“Elle,” he said, smiling at my expression, “I can explain.”
I waited with my hands on my hips. There had better be a damn good excuse for this tragedy. “I would have told you earlier on the phone, but you seemed rather busy.” He leaned up against the doorframe and smiled like he was a genius. “Would you attend a party with me tonight? A costume party?”
A costume. A costume party. Oh, thank god. Oh goodness, thank you. It was only temporary. It was just a costume. However, I needed to make sure. I needed to be absolutely positive. “And this,” I asked, pointing at the ridiculous getup, “this is your costume for the evening?”
“Yes.” He laughed. “Do I normally look like this?”
No. Definitely not.
“So, will you be my date? Or did I just waste fifty bucks on this rockin’ plaid shirt for no reason?”
I gave myself a second to pout. My plan would have to wait. “I can throw something together, I suppose.”
“You can invite your friends if you want.” He walked inside and shut the door. “It is a party, after all.”
I didn’t really want Sloan within fifty feet of him right now, but I didn’t feel like explaining that. “I could give them a call, I guess.”
I grabbed my cell as I ran for the closet. Sloan answered on the first ring. “Hey, Elle. What’s up?”
“Grab your red stilettos. We’ve got a party to attend.”
I threw myself into the back of my walk-in closet, digging through boxes, and searching for one in particular. “Huh? I thought you would be…”
I stopped her. “Yeah, I did too. Look, he invited us to a party, so we’re going. Be in costume and ready within the hour.”
“Costume? Hell, yeah! Are you bringing the—”
“Yes.” I grunted, pulling out a little red box from a stack of books. “I’m bringing the fangs.”
Sloan laughed as the phone clicked off. I busted out of the closet and ran for the bathroom. Fifteen minutes later I heard a light tap on the door. “May I?” Oliver asked, walking in.
“Sure, I’m just finishing up.”
I checked my hair before strutting out into my bedroom. He sat on the edge of my bed, and I watched his eyes rake down me. I knew the hoochie boots were a good idea. I took in a sharp breath. Could he look any hotter on my bed? My eyes locked on his, the absence of the buffer stinging at me, and I realized that he could in fact look so much hotter.
“I’m not complaining,” he said, eyeing my legs again, “but you haven’t even changed. What have you been doing in here?”
I smiled, revealing the pointed fangs now securely attached to my canines.
“Oh.”
I couldn’t help but laugh as he immediately set upright on the bed.
I purred, running my tongue over them as I walked toward him. I sat on his lap and ran my fingers down his face. “You look so tasty. I might have to make you my snack later. You are my new favorite flavor, after all.”
A low rumbling erupted from his chest as his hand tinkered around the hem of my mini skirt. “We don’t get many girls like you out here on the ranch,” he said, imitating his best John Wayne voice.
I whipped myself around until I was straddling his waist. “I bet you don’t. How about you take me out to the barn and let’s have a little fun in the hayloft?”
“Yes, ma’am.” He smiled against my neck.
I started to understand Sloan’s fascination. I had to admit this was kind of fun. I kissed my way down his neck, enjoying his sweet taste. I opened my mouth, allowing the fangs to graze his skin, and suddenly he gripped my ass and pulled me back. “Not yet.”
I leaned up, looking him in the eye, and stuck out my lip. “But I’m thirsty.”
He bit his lip and closed his eyes. “I promise you can do whatever you want to me later.”
I jerked open one the buttons on his shirt. “Oh, I plan on it, cowboy.”
His eyes widened as I got up. I was left to admire the full effect through his new Wranglers. “You’re going to need to sex it down a bit, before we pick up Sloan,” I advised, “or I won’t be able to assure your safety.”
“Is it a long drive?”
“No.”
“Then maybe we should walk, because I’m going to need a minute after that.”
I nodded and took his hand. Once outside, he leaned in closer, wrapping his arm around me as we walked. “I can’t let anything happen to my naughty little vampire tonight.”
“I have to admit,” I said, snuggling closer, “this is a pretty exciting first date.”
“Well, you are the first reason I’ve had to get my nose out the books since school started, so I figured I should take full advantage.”
We took our time walking. I wasn’t in any hurry. I finally got the chance to learn more about him. I found out he only came to Maryland due to the all expenses paid scholarship he’d earned. He had one sibling, his younger brother Dexter, who loved my X-Men poster we’d sent him for his birthday, and he had an overprotective mother who thought he was surely going to die of starvation. I made a mental note to start adding actual meals in with the sweet treats. I couldn’t let my nerd function on sugar alone. He needed to get a little protein in there.
By the time we made it to Sloan’s apartment, the conversation had diluted to his obsession with classic movies and my hidden passion to own my own bakeshop. I stood outside Sloan’s door for a minute, trying to decide if this was a good idea or not. I was taking a hot cowboy into Sloan’s house. I was surprised there weren’t some kind of warn
ing sirens going off upon his arrival on her doorstep. Oliver looked at me then at the closed door that I wasn’t knocking on. “What are you waiting for?”
“Oh, nothing.” I searched around for the sirens again before making three short knocks on the door.
Sloan quickly slung it open, pulling me inside. “Hey, guys, I am so excited about tonight. I love costume parties.” She grabbed the little red box out of my hands. “Give me the fangs. I’ve got to finish my outfit.”
She was about to turn around for the bathroom when she finally noticed Oliver. She stopped dead still. It was as if she’d frozen into a statue. Oliver’s cheeks blushed under her stare, and I gave her a quick stab to the ribs. “Sloan.” I said her name slowly and with warning in my tone. “Oliver has chosen to dress up as a cowboy tonight for his costume.”
Her eyes twinkled. “I can see that.”
“I’m guessing you’re going as a vampire as well,” he asked, eyeing the box in her hand.
She nodded. I squeezed her shoulder, trying to bring her out of the cowboy trance. I didn’t want the horny to burst out when the shock faded. “I’ll be right back,” she said. “By the way, I invited Preston. He should be here any minute.”
“That’s great.” I shoved her toward the bathroom then looked back at Oliver. “I’ll be right back. I’m going to help Sloan with her fangs.”
I pushed her in the bathroom and locked the door behind us.
“Elle.” She threw her hands out in disbelief. “What the hell were you thinking letting him come in my house looking like that?”
“I had no idea he had this planned.” I laughed, because what else could I do at this point? “Imagine my surprise when he showed up on my doorstep like that.”
She pointed her finger at me. “You better be glad Preston is coming with us. And hell, I still can’t promise anything. Especially after a couple shots tonight.”
“Just remember he is still a dorky nerd underneath. At least that’s what I will be telling myself all night.”
She smirked as she opened up the red box and started to apply her fangs. Soon, we were ready. We had to wait for Preston to arrive. I made sure to keep myself firmly planted between my cowboy and Sloan the entire time. She kept throwing me wicked smirks just to piss me off. I had never been happier to hear a damn doorbell ring. Sloan opened the door, and from the angle where we stood, I couldn’t see Preston on the other side. Whatever his costume was had left Sloan speechless. “Oh no.”
Preston’s slow southern drawl echoed from the other side. “Hello, Miss Sloan. Don’t you look mighty fine this evening.”
She smiled, but quickly turned to me with a panicked expression on her face. I looked at her, confused, not understanding what the problem could be. Preston walked in, placing his arm around Sloan’s shoulder. “Hey, y’all. Thanks for inviting us to the party.”
I tried to gasp, but the air caught in my throat. This couldn’t be freaking happening. Oliver laughed next to me. “So, are you like a pale Steve Urkel?”
Preston’s face brightened. “Exactly! I thought the suspenders may be a little much, but I figured, what the hell, why not?”
Why not? I bet Sloan could give a list of why nots right now. He pushed the large, awkward glasses up his nose and snapped his suspenders. “So, what do you think, Miss Elle? Can I pass as a nerd for the evening?”
Sloan glared at me. “Don’t answer that.”
Preston ignored her as he inspected Oliver’s outfit. “Cowboy?”
Oliver nodded. “Yeah. Elle and I were talking about the movie Young Guns the other day, and it gave me the idea.”
Preston nodded like it made perfect sense. “You wanna borrow my hat and belt buckle?”
“You have a hat?” Oliver’s eyes lit up, and Sloan’s face went a couple shades lighter.
“Yeah, actually, it’s here. Sloan asked me to bring it over to show her the other night,” he explained.
I stifled a snort and smirked at her. “I bet she did.”
Preston trotted off with Oliver to retrieve what I was sure were props in Sloan’s last rendezvous with Mr. Huckleberry. As soon as they left, she shook me in pure freak-out mode. “What are we going to do?”
“What do you mean?” I shrugged and looked toward the bedroom where I heard the guys talking. “I think it’s kind of funny. I mean what are the odds?”
“We have to make them switch,” she pressed more seriously.
I rolled my eyes. “Come on, Sloan. They have to be the nerd and the southern gentleman every single day of their lives. Let them live a fantasy for one night. They will both go back to normal tomorrow.”
She crossed her arms and pouted.
“We could always just switch for the night,” I said, and it got the response I wanted.
She slapped me. “Stay away from my cowboy.”
“Well, I can’t promise anything after a couple shots.”
She shot daggers at me when the boys came back in the room. Oliver was now adorned in a cowboy hat and a large gold belt buckle. Sloan whimpered next to me. This was just going to be too much tonight. “Everyone ready?” Oliver asked, opening the front door.
“Oh, yeah,” I said, walking past Preston. “I am so ready for this.”
Just because I couldn’t help myself, I snapped one of Preston’s suspenders as I went by. “I’m thinking body shots tonight.” I winked at him, revealing my fangs.
If you were quiet enough, I would have sworn you could hear Sloan’s head explode behind me. Just to be safe, I ran and engulfed myself in Oliver’s arms. “What do you say, cowboy? Body shots?”
“I told you I’m yours for the taking tonight, oh, evil temptress of the night.”
“Hmm…you shouldn’t have said that.”
I pulled him out the door and we started walking down the street toward our party. Sloan even lightened up enough to start skipping as we rounded the corner. Two vampires, a cowboy, and a nerd. I could hear the Twilight Zone theme song echoing in my head. This was going to be one hell of a night.
Chapter Eighteen
SHOTS
Rowdy Randy’s Pub had a giant banner hanging out front announcing the costume party and half priced shots. College kids were coming out of the woodwork. A bouncer stood at the door, letting people in as others came out. Music blasted out of the open windows. I worried the tired looking brick building might start to crumble from the deep beat of the bass that rattled the glass.
The bouncer took one look at Sloan and recognized her. He waved us forward, bypassing the long line. Good thing she and Ava were regulars on Friday night. “Thanks, Gus.” Sloan smiled at the abnormally tall guy, and he nodded without saying a word.
I slipped around the black rope that blocked the doorway and pulled Oliver along with me. We waded through the crowd and found an open spot at the bar. A very small open spot. We squeezed in tight together as Sloan waved down the bartender.
Oliver’s lips pressed against my ear. “I had no idea it would be this crowded,” he said above the buzz of the chatter around us.
I wrapped my arm around his waist. “It’s not a problem.”
I inched even closer to him, our hips connecting, and he got my point. His arm slung around my shoulder, allowing my lips to come mere inches from his chin. I leaned even further into him and he grinned down at me. “Definitely not a problem.”
Sloan handed shots over her shoulder to Preston, and he passed them out to each of us. Once everyone had two each, she turned around and held hers up. “So the game is called I’ve Never,” she explained, twirling the shot of something blue around in her fingers. “I’m guessing everyone knows the rules.”
“Yes.” I rolled my eyes. Everyone knew the rules of that game. “If you have done it, you take a shot.”
Oliver eyed his muddy brown shots cautiously. “Umm, don’t you think we should maybe ease into this? I mean, hardcore shots right off the bat might not be the best idea for the longevity of our night.”
“Pony up, cowboy.” Sloan smirked and dinged her shot glass against his. “Or is that belt buckle all you’re packing?”
His eyes narrowed at her. “I am more concerned with Elle and yourself,” he said, pointing at our shots. “I can handle it.”
“We’ll see about that.” She grinned and held up her first shot. “I’ve done a lot of things, but I’ve never watched porn on my phone during class.”
Without moving their heads, the guys shot a glance toward each other, but neither of them raised their shot glasses. Pussies. I picked up my glass and took my shot.
Oliver’s eyes widened. “Eloise?”
I shrugged. “It was an accident. Ava stole my phone and left me some very vile surprises.”
Preston sniggered and took his shot. “Same thing happened to me. At least that’s the story I’m going with.” Preston slammed his empty glass against the bar behind him. “And might I say, Elle. You took that shot like a champ. Do you mind if I call you Elle?”
“Tonight? Tonight you can call me anything you want,” I said, winking at him.
Sloan kicked me under the bar. “So, you taking the shot or not cowboy?” I asked, looking down at Oliver’s glass.
He sighed and shrugged. “I’ve never watched porn in class.”
“Nerd,” Preston said, pushing his glasses up his nose.
Oliver snorted, motioning for the bartender to send Preston and me another round. “My turn,” Preston announced. “I’ve done a lot of things, but I have never kissed anyone of the same sex.”
They both stared at us. They stared at us with evil grins. Sloan and I glanced at each other. Neither of us took a shot.
“Come on,” Preston pouted, “you could at least lie to me.”
“She’s not my type,” we both stated at the same time.
Sloan looked over at Oliver, and he quickly glanced down at his glass. “What?”
“Your turn.”
Oliver took a deep breath. “I’ve done a lot of things, but I have never spied on my best friend in the library.”
Sloan’s nose wrinkled up, but she took her shot. It was my turn. I was determined to get alcohol in that boy’s system. I wracked my brain, trying to figure out something I could say that would force Oliver to take a shot. It was times like these that made me wish I was more innocent. Then again, if I was that innocent, I probably wouldn’t be trying to get my date drunk. Sloan could tell I was thinking hard, and I noticed she started doing some crude gestures toward her mouth. Then it finally hit me what she was trying to convey.
Confession Of A Nerdoholic Page 14