The Non-Silence of the Lamb

by Luke Brown

  Leonard was very organized in everything he did. While all of the other students carried knapsacks and regular school bags, Leonard carried a business-like briefcase as if he were the teacher rather than the student—or a young Wall Street executive. It was a secondhand briefcase that had been given to Essie by one of her bosses, Dr. McNelly. Leonard was more than happy to make good use of it. He knew that he stood out and was mocked by the crowd, but he was proud to be different.

  Once Leonard made an unusual book stand in his woodworking class. It had the appearance of a pulpit stand made in the shape of the stone tablets of the Ten Commandments, but in addition, it had a place to hold and keep a book open while reading. Leonard nailed the hands-free book-holder stand permanently to his student desk. Whenever anyone entered the classroom, they could immediately spot Leonard’s desk—the only one in the classroom like it. At the end of the school year, he took his special desk to his new classroom.

  Another time, Leonard made a special gift for his mother in woodworking class: a wooden frame with a heart carved out in the middle and an arrow running through it like the Cupid sign. He was proud of his handiwork. When he took it home and gave it to his mother, she loved it and decided to hang it in the family room. The next day when he came home from school, he noticed that it had been chopped into many fine pieces with a knife or machete. The culprit turned out to be his younger brother Bunny.

  Leonard was very upset, but he understood the nature of sibling jealousy. Therefore, he forgave his younger brother for being only human. Leonard knew that there were many more untapped ideas in his mind that no one could destroy so easily.

  When Leonard was fourteen, he and a neighborhood friend named Joseph attempted to stow away on a cruise ship going to the US. It began when Leonard, being a very close friend, listened to Joseph’s big plans and dreams and tried to support his friend’s idea as much as he could. Eventually, his support went a little too far.

  He was now not only a supporter, but a possible partner with Joseph in his ambitious plan. The plan was that they both would stow away on a ship to the United States and find a relative who would come and get them at the US port or somewhere close by. Leonard was comfortable living his life as a high school student with a bright future. He strongly believed in a good education. He believed that a mind really was a terrible thing to waste. His favorite quote was from the great Bob Marley, who said, “Emancipate yourself from mental slavery. None but ourselves can free our minds.” However, if it was a real possibility that he could be transported to the United States safely, Leonard certainly would go for it.

  When the time came, Joseph and Leonard excitedly packed their knapsacks with some of the basic things that they naively judged they would need to survive on their expedition. That night they confidently headed down to the Montego Bay pier, where a US cruise ship was docked. Once they got there, however, the reality of the danger involved became obvious. He denounced the audacious but premature plan and canceled his support of Joseph’s big idea.

  Joseph was angry because he was intent on following through with his plan. But when Leonard left and headed back toward home, Joseph reluctantly followed him. They both decided that there had to be a better way.

  Thus, when Leonard received the immigration package from his sister for obtaining his student visa, he was delighted and realized that this was the better way that he had been wishing for all along. The whole family was excited to see that one of them was about to set foot on US soil, where impossible dreams came true. They realized, for the first time, that Leonard might make it to become a doctor after all. Everyone cheered him on.

  Mrs. Essie Brown and Leonard got up early one morning and went on a four-hour drive to the US embassy in Kingston. They had high hopes, but when they received a negative response, they were in despair. The embassy gave no explanation. They simply stamped Leonard’s passport with a denial stamp and returned it to them.

  Leonard felt like it was the day of reckoning, and he had fallen short of making it through heaven’s gate because his papers were stamped for condemnation. Both he and his mother returned home from the four-hour journey back to Glenworth sad and depressed, and Leonard sank into a despairing and melancholy mood. It seemed like the deluded dream was dying that day.

  But Leonard’s dream wouldn’t die so easily. His determination was much too strong for the door to be miraculously opened and then suddenly shut on him just like that. It would not happen without a fight.

  Leonard encouraged his mother to take him back to the embassy the following week and to get an additional referral from his school, although it wasn’t a requirement. Mrs. Essie Brown did obtain the referral from Leonard’s school, and they both returned the following week. They presented their documents to the embassy, but were rejected once again.

  Leonard, though dejected, pleaded with his heavyhearted mother to take him back to the embassy the following week. That week, they obtained a referral letter from the Honorable Howard Cook, the minister of education in Montego Bay.

  They again returned to the US embassy, but they were rejected once more. Even though he kept getting knocked down, Leonard would not stay down. He would not give up. He believed that if he gave up, he would be giving up on his dreams and letting down his sister Gena, who had faithfully done her part. He pleaded with Mrs. Essie Brown to take him one last time.

  Although his mother was exhausted, she attempted the trying journey once more. This time, they had obtained a letter of referral from a local politician. Unfortunately, it didn’t make any difference. They were turned down again.

  Leonard refused to let go; he was like a dog holding on to a bone. He begged his poor, tired, and exhausted mother to try one more time. Mrs. Essie Brown reluctantly and cheerlessly gave in to her desperate son’s plea. She didn’t know how much longer she could go on with this failing venture. She thought he was like a dog barking up the wrong tree. However, she mustered up enough energy to go one last time. They gathered another referral from a different local politician and headed to the US embassy.

  Essie decided that this time, everything was in the Lord’s hands, and whatever the outcome, it was what the Lord wanted for her son at that time. She prayed a long, deep prayer, and then she said, “Lord, if it’s thy will, let it be done. Amen.”

  They went inside the US embassy and waited their turn. When they were called to the window, they presented all of the required documents, but sadly, the immigration officer simply opened the passport book, noticed the many previous rejection stamps, quickly added another one, and returned the seemingly condemned documents to them.

  They were very sad because they both knew that they had done all that they could do, and this must be the will of God at that particular time.

  Mrs. Essie Brown was fully convinced that if the Lord had wanted her son to travel to the United States, it would have happened on the first attempt. She even blamed herself somewhat for questioning the will of God.

  However, Leonard was also a strong Christian, and he still believed that it was the will of God for him to travel to the United States and get started on his journey to becoming a doctor who could do mighty things for the sick and the needy. Why would God not want another pair of healing hands on earth? Leonard believed that it was God who had given him the unyielding drive and intense appetite to become a physician.

  He also believed that his mother was right. It was not the will of God for him to get a US student visa at that particular time. “That particular time” was the key phrase that separated Leonard’s belief from his mother’s. Leonard believed that although it was clearly not the will of God when they had gone to the embassy a week earlier, the following week, it surely would be the will of God.

  Leonard convinced himself that where they had gone wrong was attempting to get a student visa one and a half months too soon. They could now see that it was incontrovertibly not the will of God. The will of God was for them to go to the embassy three weeks before the SDA school
in New York reopened for the spring semester.

  He tried to convince his mother of his logic, but, totally burned out over this situation, she didn’t buy it. She did, however, ask her oldest son, Junior, to accompany Leonard one more time to the embassy.

  That week, Leonard did the old routine and got an additional reference from another reputable official. Then he and Junior headed to the embassy, but it was like an excruciating curse was upon them. They were appalled to be turned down once more.

  Leonard could not believe what was happening to him. He knew this had to be the big break that he needed to realistically move in the direction of his dreams. He believed that God wanted him to be a doctor to help save lives and be an important contributor to this world.

  For the first time, his eyes became truly opened, and it dawned on him that his dreams could be delusional. At that time only the richest and the best of the best got admitted to do medicine at the University of the West Indies. He was not in that category at all. He didn’t consider himself a top scholar, but he’d always believed that, with hard work, he could do anything that a great man could do.

  His motto in life was reflected in one of his favorite poems by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow:

  The heights by great men reached and kept

  Were not attained by sudden flight,

  But they, while their companions slept,

  Were toiling upward in the night.

  Only sons of doctors, professors, and popular politicians got accepted, because, in Jamaica, the spaces for medical students in those days were very few and highly competitive. Leonard knew that realistically he had no chance of fulfilling his dreams on the island of Jamaica.

  Leonard could not accept defeat. He asked his big brother to take him back the following week, but Junior refused to waste his time fruitlessly traveling four hours to and four hours back from the US embassy, just to be turned down again. Leonard pleaded with everyone to take him to the embassy again, but they all refused. They all sadly encouraged their brother to face the fact that his dream was not going to happen.

  That week, Leonard went to his school library and did some research. He found out that dentistry was one profession that could not be studied in Jamaica at that time. There was currently no dental program available on the whole island.

  Leonard now knew what he would have to do to circumvent the system. He would have to let the immigration officer know that he wanted to do dentistry instead of medicine. Leonard was ready to go to the embassy the next week, but no one wanted to go with him. No one wanted to waste their precious time.

  Being sixteen and a half years old, Leonard decided that he would go all by himself. After having gone six times, he was not afraid. He understood the route and the procedure. Therefore, on the appointed day, he got up at 3:00 to walk to the main bus stop and catch the bus that would take him to Kingston.

  Although he was the only one on the dark, desolate street, he was not afraid. He remembered what his mother had told him one day when he was ten years old: “Son, all great men will pass away sooner or later, and the new great man is still a child at your age even as we speak. At some point, the society will be looking to your younger generation to fill major roles. It’s to your advantage to choose your roles now and choose wisely. They will need prisoners to fill jails just as they will need doctors to fill hospitals and care for the wounded, and lawyers to fight for the weak and the innocent, and presidents or prime ministers to lead the country and the world. Son, the earlier you choose for or against a future role, the better will be your chances.”

  Ever since then, after praying to God to help him, Leonard made his choice and sincerely believed that God wanted him to live to be a productive man in this world, and he would not die until the job was done. Because God had chosen him to be of service to mankind, he had no reason to be afraid. The only serious fear Leonard had was that the immigration officer wouldn’t deal with him because he was a minor.

  When Leonard got to the embassy, he repeated all of the steps that his mother and big brother had previously taken. Eventually, it was his turn to approach the window to speak with the seemingly disgruntled immigration officer. Leonard was ready to put it all on the line. This was his final attempt, and if he was going down, he was going down swinging.

  He stepped forward, handed the interviewer his documents, and said in a firm but polite tone, “Sir, I don’t know what the problem is. I have all of the required documents and more. I intend to study dentistry in the future, and studies for this profession are not available in any schools in Jamaica. The high school that accepted me in the US is waiting on me. Classes are about to start soon, and I’m still here in Jamaica.”

  As Leonard spoke, he noticed that the interviewer was no longer listening. Instead, the officer went over to the other side of the counter, shuffled some papers, and signed and stamped some documents. In each of Leonard’s previous attempts, the interviewer simply took his documents, read them, and then stamped a rejection notice right there without moving to the other side of the counter. Leonard was dumbfounded. Although he liked what he saw, he was much too afraid that the immigration officer would still reject his documents.

  He therefore kept talking, although it seemed as if he was talking to himself. He acted as if this was his judgment day and he was at the pearly gates, nervously pleading for his dear life. “I don’t know what the problem is. The school is calling me to find out what’s going on. They are expecting me to join the class early. I have books to buy and school-related preparations to make.”

  While Leonard was still talking, the immigration officer stepped back to the interview window and told him to go through the side door. Leonard was stunned. The officer did not return the documents to him, as the others had, so that was a good sign. Also, he had never been told to go through that particular door before, so that was another good sign.

  Leonard was thrilled but bewildered. He couldn’t believe what was happening right in front of his eyes. He was about to get his student visa after all, after being rejected so many times in a row. He was amused to be getting it now, after everyone had absolutely given up on him.

  The story was once told of a man who was traveling up a snowy mountain and stopped to rest for a minute. It was now night, and it was very dark. Suddenly he fell and started tumbling down the side of the mountain. Luckily, the hiker grabbed a branch as he was rapidly falling. He hung onto the branch for dear life.

  He prayed to God to save him, and God answered and told the man to let go. The man was shocked and severely disappointed to hear that his beloved God, the one he had always trusted, wanted him to let go and die. The hiker was not ready to die, so he held on even tighter.

  The next day, a crowd of people gathered on the road below. They were amazed at the strange sight of a man who had frozen to death clutching a tree branch. Everyone was puzzled, wondering why the poor man didn’t let go of the branch. The road was only three feet below him.

  The moral of the story is that you have to trust and believe, but more than anything else, you have to do your part so God can do His. Leonard surely did his part and more.

  That day at the embassy, he did receive the long-awaited student visa. Within two weeks, he emigrated to the United States to live with his sister Gena. He was now on his way to pursuing his medical career.

  Mrs. Essie Brown was very happy, because she knew that she had a son who was a determined fighter just like herself. It reminded her of the incident when he was two years old and had run frantically out of the street so he wouldn’t get hurt by the taxi. From then on, she knew that Leonard was a special person. She believed that Leonard was blessed by God.

  That was how Gena got Leonard to live with her in the United States. One down, but she had almost a dozen more to go.

  The next person she got to the USA was her niece, Denise (Junior and Pauline’s oldest daughter). The way she got her is highly classified information and cannot be discussed here. Yes, it can. After a
ll, this is the non-silence of the LAMB. Gena by this time had a daughter by the name of Desiree, who was born in the USA. Desiree was about the same age as Denise. Gena send her American-born daughter, Desiree to Jamaica to spend a year with her grandmother. A few months after Desiree arrived in Jamaica, Gena switched birth papers so that Denise was able to use Desiree’s birth certificate to travel to the US. The bold thing about this action was that Gena was the one who went to Jamaica to accompany Denise on her flight into the USA. She held Denise’s hand as she boldly and confidently strolled through the immigration check point at the airport back in the United States.

  After trying a few strategies to get the remainder of her family members to the United States, some successful, some not, Gena was finally able to file for her mother, Mrs. Essie Brown. It took a little longer than she would have liked. However, Mrs. Essie Brown’s papers came through five years after Gena became a US citizen.

  By this time, Mrs. Essie Brown’s husband, Tim, had unfortunately died from renal complications. Therefore, Mrs. Essie Brown traveled to the United States alone. She then became a US citizen, which allowed her to file for all the rest of her children, and they were all approved.

  Finally Gena could say that she had fulfilled her promise to her mother. The miracle baby was able to make a way for herself and then paved the way, against all odds, for the rest of her family. Gena was indisputably the unsung hero of Essie’s family. She single-handedly effected a major upswing in the statistical graph of Essie’s life.

  Chapter 25

  Essie often called Bunny her “wash belly,” a term indicating that he was her last child. By the time Bunny had come of age, he was doing very well for himself. He lived with Joyce, his committed girlfriend of more than twelve years. The leather business they had started together was growing rapidly and turning over good profits, the way Rumpelstiltskin turned straw into gold.