“You were young. You’re not the first kid who’s ever made a mistake.”
He meant the words as consolation of sorts, but Sophia reacted as if he’d started throwing around accusations like stones. Her expression turned cold, and she shook her head. “No, I’m not the first. And the problem with my mistakes is that I keep repeating them,” she added with a cynical laugh that was a mockery of the lighthearted sound he’d heard so many times in St. Louis.
“Sophia…” He drew out her name, waiting for her to explain. Wanting her to explain. Wanting her to confide in him the way she had before even though he’d completely lost the right to her trust.
He wanted it back. More than the welcoming smiles or shared laughter. More, even, than the soft, seductive promise of her lips against his, more than the feel of having her in his arms again.…
But what he wanted would have to wait.
Without another word, Sophia turned and walked away.
Chapter Five
It was foolish to have expected something else—something more, Sophia thought as she walked back toward the diner with a silent Jake at her side. If she were completely honest, he’d reacted better than the rest of Clearville had when the gossip ran rampant through the town.
Yet the ache in her heart told Sophia how much she’d hoped Jake would instinctively doubt what he’d found and just…trust her.
“Sophia, wait.” He stopped her with a hand on her arm and turned her to face him. “Take a drive with me.”
“A drive? Where?”
His golden gaze held hers in a grip far more compelling and irresistible than the one on her arm. “Does it matter?”
A few weeks ago, it wouldn’t have. She would have gone anywhere, done anything if it meant spending time with him. Was it possible he wanted those days back as much as she did?
The thought shook her resolve, weakening her resistance, but Sophia wasn’t about to let Jake know the hold he still had over her. Lifting her chin, she said, “Fine. But only because I’m not ready to go home yet.”
Turning away before she could judge whether Jake read the truth behind her words, Sophia led the way to the rental car he’d parked at the diner.
She thought he might head through town into the rolling hills home to Clearville’s farming community. Instead, he took a tree-lined path that led out of town toward the shoreline.
“How did you know about this spot?” she asked as he pulled the car to a stop at a small turn-out overlooking the beach. While the location might not have been well known to tourists, it was a frequent destination for local teens. Did Jake realize the place was Clearville’s version of lovers’ lane?
“I drove around a bit before I went to your parents’ house.”
The admission froze any thoughts of lovers in Sophia’s mind. “Trying to get in some more surveillance?”
He met her sarcasm head on. “Trying to get my courage up.”
The sincerity in his handsome face tempted her to believe him. Pressure built against her chest—an urge to cry combined with a desire to lash out at Jake for not being the man she’d thought he was, the man she wanted him to be. She couldn’t come up with a single reason why he’d be lying to her—but she would have sworn he was telling the truth three weeks ago, and she would have been wrong then.
Needing to escape, Sophia pushed the car door open and climbed out. The sky was surprisingly clear, and she could see the distant waves relentlessly roll toward the rocky shoreline. The tang of salt and sea filled the air, but once she heard Jake shut his own door, another scent teased her senses—the aftershave he wore. She could feel him behind her, drawing her closer with a pull as powerful and elemental as the tide. She reached out and grabbed hold of the rough metal guard-rail—anything to keep from simply sinking back into his arms.
The hair on the nape of her neck stood on end, but Sophia refused to turn and lose herself in the golden glow of his eyes. Eyes that saw too much, knew too much. Just like she could feel the intensity of his gaze on her back, his unasked questions bored into her, digging holes she didn’t want dug, pressing buttons she didn’t want pressed.
“Why did you come here, Jake?” she demanded. Maybe it wasn’t fair, demanding to know his secrets when she refused to spill anymore of her own, but even if she never said another word, Jake still knew far more about her than she did about him. And that disadvantage really didn’t seem fair.
“I told you. I wanted to apologize and to explain. I’d still like to explain.”
“You were hired to find out the truth. It was a job. I was a job.”
“Sophia.”
Her hands tightened on the rail. How could the simple use of her name be so powerful, so compelling that she could feel her resolve start to weaken? She stared out at the Pacific, feeling as rudderless as a piece of driftwood tossed about by the waves.
“Look at me.”
Her pulse already picking up its pace, Sophia slowly turned. Jake stood only inches away, close enough that she had to tip her head back to meet his eyes. She saw the question in his gaze, asking for a second chance, but she couldn’t stop from looking closer, deeper, for a deception he might be trying to hide.
He had tried to tell her why he’d taken the job before, but at the time, she’d been far too shocked to listen. The reasons why hadn’t mattered. All Sophia heard was that Jake had gotten close to her only to learn the real reason why the Dunworthys had “let her go.”
The shock may have faded, but the hurt remained, leaving a sore spot Sophia wanted to protect. Her anger made a good shield; without it, she was afraid she’d be leaving herself far too open and vulnerable to anything—truth or lie—Jake had to say.
With his gaze still intently searching her face, Jake said, “What happened between the two of us was never part of the job. That’s not how I work.”
“Oh, really?” Sophia challenged.
Don’t ask…don’t do it…you don’t want to know.
The words flashed through her mind, a warning in capital, neon letters, but she couldn’t stop from asking, “So how does this kind of thing normally go?”
“Most the time, it’s easy enough to get what I need.”
She felt her cheeks start to burn. No doubt she’d been easier than most, falling for undeniable charm and subtle seduction. Maybe she should take comfort that, at least this time, she’d fallen for a professional.
“A few drinks at a club or a bar or a line about being a friend of a friend, and people end up saying more than they realize, especially if you know the right questions to ask.”
“But—”
He hadn’t taken her to a bar or a club, and he certainly hadn’t bought her any drinks. She couldn’t even recall him asking any “well-informed” questions about Todd or the Dunworthys. In the end, she’d told him everything he wanted to know, but had he ever asked?
“What?” Jake questioned when Sophia cut herself off.
“Nothing.” The last thing she needed was to point out how Jake had treated her differently and hear him once again say she was special. A few more times, and she’d helplessly start to believe it. “None of that matters anyway because you were still hired—”
“I was asked for a favor by a friend,” he clarified. “Another private investigator who thought you might have information that would keep his ex-girlfriend, Emily Wilson, from marrying Todd. Connor knew the first time he met Todd that the guy was too good to be true, and he was ready to do all he could to stop the wedding. Including asking for my help.”
If not for the part she’d played in the drama, Sophia would have thought the story very romantic. But it still hurt to think she and the child she carried were nothing but a dirty little secret while Emily Wilson was the kind of woman Todd was proud to show off to his friends and family.
After the way he treated her, Sophia had told herself she didn’t care what he did or who he married. But that total lack of care hadn’t stopped her from reading everything she found online about
the wedding. It didn’t help that Emily was possibly the most beautiful woman Sophia had ever seen. Todd’s “socially acceptable” fiancée was a gorgeous blonde who could have been on the cover of a fashion magazine. Little wonder status-conscious Todd had thought she belonged on his arm.
But Sophia had to grudgingly give the other woman credit. In one of his messages after leaving St. Louis, Jake had told her that Emily had called off the wedding and Todd’s bid to return to the family’s good graces had failed. Judging by the article Sophia had read online, the Dunworthy-Wilson wedding would have been a huge event, and it couldn’t have been easy for Emily to call things off only days before the ceremony, even after finding out Todd had cheated.
“So did your friend get her back?” At Jake’s questioning glance, Sophia said, “Emily. Did she and Connor get back together after she called off the wedding?”
The corner of Jake’s mouth kicked up in a smile. “No. He fell hard for Emily’s cousin Kelsey. They ended up getting married at the wedding Kelsey originally planned for Emily.”
Sophia blinked her surprised. “That’s…different.”
“Yeah.” Jake gave a half laugh. “But the wedding meant the world to Kelsey, and well—I get the feeling Kelsey means the world to Connor.”
Ignoring the ache in her heart at his words, an envy for a couple she’d never even met, Sophia said, “Sounds like he’s a good guy.”
“Yeah, he is.” Jake stared at her, the intensity in his gaze enough to make her start to fidget and look away. “And I’m sorry you didn’t have someone looking out for you the way Connor did for Emily.”
Sophia had tried to keep her focus on a spot over Jake’s shoulder, but at his words, her gaze flew back to his. He sounded so sincere, as if ready to volunteer to fill that position in the future. To be the man who would look out for her, the man she could count on. And that irresistible pull seemed to reach out once more, drawing Sophia to Jake, weakening her defenses enough to send panic shoring up those walls.
Forcing a cool smile, she said, “But you forget, Jake. I’m not the injured party here. I’m the other woman.”
“Bull,” Jake bit out. “You were as much of an innocent as Emily Wilson.”
Sophia gave a short, pained laughed. “Not exactly innocent,” she muttered as she ducked out, squeezing from between the railing and his immovable form.
Jake caught her before she could walk away. She should have known it wouldn’t be that easy, and the frisson of awareness racing down to her fingertips and back up again would be harder to escape than his grip on her arm. “Did you know Dunworthy was seeing someone else?”
“I should have—”
“Did you know?” Jake pressed.
“No. But that makes me stupid, not innocent—”
Letting go of her arm, Jake pressed his index finger against her lips. “Sophia, stop! You’re an amazing woman, and Todd’s an idiot. He doesn’t deserve you.” Some shadow of emotion flickered across Jake’s expression only to disappear before she could put a name to it. “You know that, don’t you?” he pressed.
Trusting Todd had been another screwup in a long list of screwups, and Sophia couldn’t help blaming herself. But after the way the Dunworthys had belittled her—nothing more than a maid!—for thinking she could ever be good enough for their son, Sophia longed to believe Jake. To believe Todd was the one not good enough for her or her child…
“I know,” she finally agreed, her lips moving against Jake’s fingers, the slightly rough texture of his skin creating a tingling friction.
His eyes darkened as he drew a fingertip along the bow of her upper lip. Her pulse picked up its pace, the awareness and attraction swirling around them like morning fog, and Sophia thought he might kiss her. She swallowed hard. Crazy to think how much she’d missed Jake Cameron’s kisses—the sense of hunger, of passion, yet at the same time a tenderness and caring.
Crazy, all right, when she was now well aware that the tenderness and care had all been a lie. For all she knew the hunger and passion had been as well.
Ducking away from his touch, she said, “But Todd didn’t always act like an idiot. When he wanted, he could be charming and funny. I guess I was infatuated from the start, seeing only what I wanted to see.”
She’d closed her eyes to the selfish, irresponsible side of Todd’s personality, and she’d been in for a rude awakening.
“But I don’t think I would have—”
“Would have what?”
“I was going to say I don’t think I would have slept with him if it hadn’t been for that one night.”
“What happened?”
They’d changed positions with Jake now against the railing. Despite his relaxed posture, tension hummed beneath the surface. A muscle jumped along his jaw, and the skin stretched tight across his knuckles where his hands were braced on the metal crossbar.
But he already knew the unhappy ending. What difference would it make if she told him how the whole thing started?
“It was my birthday. I’d talked to my parents and my brothers, but somehow it only made me miss them even more.”
The breeze picked up, carrying the scent of the ocean along with dozens of memories, it seemed. Her parents—her mother especially—loved a party. One of the many reasons Sophia wanted their anniversary to be so special. Birthdays, like all the holidays, were events filled with food and fun and love.
“You were homesick,” Jake said.
“I was,” Sophia admitted, thinking back to that night. “I hadn’t seen Todd in a while. He’d moved to Scottsdale a few months earlier.” Scottsdale—where his perfect girlfriend from the perfect family lived. Not that Sophia had known that.
All she knew was that he’d been a lone bright spot in a dull and somewhat lonely job where she was expected to fade into the background, unnoticed and unheard. It was the Dunworthy rule for “staff,” one Todd frequently broke, offering a wink or a smile when the rest of the family was around and taking time to talk to her when they weren’t.
It had all been so harmless until that night…
“It was almost midnight,” Sophia told Jake. “Todd was the last person I expected to walk into the kitchen, and when he did…” She shrugged. “He asked why I’d been crying, and I told him it was my birthday. He pulled a pie from the fridge. The cook had spent hours making sure every chocolate curl was just right on this masterpiece for a dinner party Mrs. Dunworthy was having the next night. Todd told me to make a wish and sliced right into it.” She gave a mocking laugh. “Seduced by chocolate silk.”
But Todd had offered more than pie. The promise of her birthday wish coming true shined brighter than twenty-three candles on a cake ever could as Todd kissed her. After so many years spent hiding in the shadows, disappearing inside someone she hardly recognized, Todd Dunworthy—Todd Dunworthy—had noticed her. And she’d been blinded by the spotlight of his attention. For him to ignore his family’s blue-blood prejudice to pursue her had to mean he cared…
“He said we had to keep our relationship a secret.” Just for now…until I find the right moment to tell my family, he’d promised, staring into her eyes with such sincerity, such caring. And she’d been such a fool. “And I bought it. I even thought the talk about his girlfriend in Arizona was just that—talk. To keep from raising his parents’ suspicions about us.”
Months later, humiliation still stung inside Sophia as she recalled how wrong she’d been. How she’d foolishly thought Todd might be happy about the baby. After all, they could finally come clean and open up about their relationship. No more waiting. No more secrets. Instead Todd had been furious. His girlfriend had been anything but pretend. She was perfect…beautiful, rich, one of his kind.
Sophia’s hand moved to her stomach as if she could protect the baby from the echo of his harsh words and accusations. Sophia was nobody. Nothing but trouble. Out to ruin his life. Two days later, the Dunworthys let her go with a severance package intended to make sure she and her child
stayed nobodies.
“I still can’t believe I fell for some of the oldest lines in the book. I was so stupid.”
“No, you weren’t. Todd took advantage at a time when you were vulnerable.”
Sophia had to give Jake credit for having the grace to at least look uncomfortable with her words. She’d rather run naked through the town than tell him she was far more vulnerable to him than she’d ever been to Todd Dunworthy.
With Todd, she should have recognized from the start the impossibility of any relationship. The maid and an heir to the Dunworthy fortune? That was something straight out of a fairy tale. But with Jake, everything had seemed so real, so full of possibility…until their relationship turned out to be more of a lie than happily-ever-after.
“Not to worry, Jake. I’ve learned my lesson.”
About trusting the wrong man at least. About wanting the wrong man?
Different story, Sophia thought as he stepped even closer. His T-shirt molded to his torso, defining his broad shoulders, muscled chest and flat abs. Sophia swallowed, wanting nothing more than to press her body against his with the same skin-tight fit.
Jake flinched at the unspoken comparison, but a flicker of annoyance followed, warning Sophia he was getting tired of defending himself. “I know you think I’m no better than Todd, but I’m telling the truth now. When I held you, when I kissed you, that was not part of the job.”
His voice lowered as he spoke, the sudden undercurrent of desire revealing a different frustration. When his gaze fell, her lips seemed to pulse with the memory of his kiss and the need for more than just a memory.
“How am I supposed to believe that,” she asked, her voice softer and more pleading than she would have liked, “when everything about our relationship was based on a lie? A lie you ended up using as—as a get-out-of-jail-free card.”
Her Fill-In Fiancé Page 7