Those were the plethora of thoughts Jamie operated from at that time. Now…now she could see that those thoughts were dead ass wrong on all levels, but back then it didn’t seem wrong at all. The more Jamie went over the day in her mind, and the subsequent chain of events thereafter, she saw for the first time just how horrendous it all was. What if I had been her? How scared she must have been to go through a pregnancy alone! And the child…shit! But now it was too late. Her tears began to pour down her face as she buried her face into her hands and sobbed.
“The crying and the panicking are starting to get on my nerves, Jamie,” her father calmly stated, finishing off his Cognac, and setting his glass down. “What’s done is done. We can’t take back the last nine years. We just can’t. Rush had no business mingling with that family after that coke head Jacob character, and his antics. No business whatsoever!” he proclaimed. “It was wonderful when that scum went on with his life and joined the NFL, got himself a whole new set of friends, and nobody heard from him. The constant foolishness playing out on every sports channel, and news outlet was inescapable, but at least he was gone. Rush was free and clear of the garbage. But then to go and bed that idiot’s sister…! After the fact? That was dumb and irresponsible.”
“Dad—” Jamie started. But then she realized that no amount of what she had to say would resonate with the man before her.
Her father was of the belief that all his actions—in whatever capacity—were always the right ones. It’s who he had always been, and she had been too busy being Daddy’s little girl to realize the many indiscretions he had committed. At the time it made sense, but now sitting listening to her father go on and on about a child that was his grandchild, with zero remorse made Jamie view him in a whole other light. Yes, she had played her very own part in the fiasco too, but at least she had some feelings about it all. He had none.
What the fuck have I done? she asked herself, as she stared through her father in a daydream-type trance. What the fuck have I done?
“Did you hear me, Jamie?”
“Yeah, I heard you,” she lied. She was done listening to him, and she was done talking to him. “I’m gonna go ahead and grab Greg and head home,” she said, standing. She wanted to make her exit as quickly as possible, but before she could, her father stood and opened his arms for her to walk into. She hesitated briefly. The last thing she wanted to do was to hug him. But then she ended up complying with the gesture and walking into the arms that had always provided her with comfort and love.
When they broke from their embrace, he instructed her to, “Drive safely, and I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
“Okay, Dad,” Jamie responded. She turned to make her exit, not once looking back at him.
Jamie was distraught. Her relationship with Rush was the one that meant the most to her, from childhood until now. He was her sounding board, her go-to, her big brother, and now that had all been demolished, and it was a pain that Jamie was unsure that she could bounce back from. Although she and Rush were technically only half siblings, there was never that title placed on them. But now, in a matter of what seemed like seconds, they were no more. He wouldn’t answer her calls, he wouldn’t respond to any text messages, and Jamie had a feeling that even after he had calmed down, talking to her wouldn’t be the first thing on his list of to-do’s.
~*~*~
Greg looked over at a detached Jamie. “What’s wrong, honey?” he asked, concerned. “Things seemed tense in there tonight.” He reached over to grab her hand into his as they drove toward her house. “You know you can talk to me about anything, Jamie. I’m here for you.”
Jamie sat in silence for a few minutes. She didn’t really know what to say to Greg without divulging too much, and regardless of how chaotic things had gotten, she refused to allow anyone, including her own boyfriend, in that deeply. They were family secrets that needed to be resolved within the family before bringing in anyone that was external to the process.
“I know you’re there for me, sweetheart. I’ll be okay, though.”
“You’ll be okay even sooner if you talked to me,” he insisted. “I’m sure I can help even if it’s something as small as a massage when we make it inside.”
She turned in his direction, and smiled. “I was thinking of going in alone tonight, Greg. I’ve just got so much on my mind, and I just—”
“No worries. I understand. I’ll drop you off and then I’ll just give you a call tomorrow to see how things are. How does that sound?”
“That sounds wonderful. You’re wonderful, and I appreciate you realizing that space to myself doesn’t necessarily mean space away from you. I need someone who understands that.”
“I certainly do,” he responded softly, as his thumb grazed along the side of her hand.
Greg was the sweetest, kindest man that Jamie had ever dealt with. He was a shoe-in for husband material. And she knew that because his boyfriend skills exceeded her expectations. He was a great kisser, an even better listener, and gentle when it came to lovemaking. He was never overly persistent about anything. Whatever she wanted, she need only ask, and he was at her every beck and call. But there came a time where being the soft man wasn’t always the best thing. It was why tonight Jamie needed to send Greg on his way so she could make room for a man that could challenge all her womanly desires. She needed to be fucked into oblivion so that she could venture to a place of numbness. She needed a rough touch, she needed her hair pulled, and her ass spanked. Hell, she wouldn’t even be opposed to being tied the fuck up. She deserved to be punished, and she welcomed it. She didn’t want to feel anything and a good dick-down from a man who knew how to give it to her, was what she craved.
At her front door, Jamie kissed Greg passionately before heading inside to prepare for her escapade. She showered, applied a generous layer of her favorite peach lotion all over her body, and made sure that her full supply of condoms was on deck. She made sure the lights were dim, and that music was softly playing in the background. After everything was set, Jamie headed to her wet bar where she took out a bottle of Patron and poured a double shot. She then chased her drink with lemon-lime RockStar. She had always been a lightweight with the liquor, so a single shot would’ve done the trick. However, she wanted that extra reinforcement, and she got it. Minutes after the final gulp, all the feelings of guilt that tried to infiltrate her conscience were defeated and sent far away.
“Yes,” she said to herself, as the liquor’s effects began to take over. “Ready, set, action…”
An hour later, her company entered the front door. Once the door was closed behind him, she handed him a pair of cuffs and extended her wrists to him. “Cuff me,” she said, smiling wickedly.
“In due time,” her visitor remarked, taking the cuffs from her hands.
Twenty-five minutes later, Jamie was on the plush chocolate and cream carpet on her living room floor, comfortably situated on all fours, and her ass cheeks spread as far as they could go while her lover’s sheathed rod was tucked deep inside her. Soon she lost control in a wave of multiple orgasms as she backed up into her lover with every bit of strength she could muster. She screamed out in ecstasy; all her inhibitions out the door, as she screamed Kenneth’s name through the large space.
“That was sooo amazing, Ken!” Jamie yelled, slowly descending from her high. “If I smoked cigarettes, this would be one of those moments. It’s celebratory, almost,” she confided.
Her partner released an exasperated sigh, and fell onto the floor to gather his strength. “We can’t keep doing this, Jamie. You’re my boss’s daughter—”
“Somehow, I don’t think that would really be an issue for him.”
Kenneth nodded his head slightly, and then shrugged his shoulders. “Well, there’s that, and you’re practically married,” he said. “Being a bad girl isn’t a nice thing,” he said, smiling. “Especially when you have a man who worships the ground you walk on.”
“I don’t want to hear all of that right no
w, Ken. You’re really killing the vibe up in here. And why do that? You like the fun, right?” she asked, sliding her leg up and down his thigh. “Why mess up things? We can be each other’s sometimes pleasure.”
“You’re playing with fire though. And honestly, as much fun as it is, this has to be it,” he confessed. “I mean, I play a lot, but I do like the option to play for keeps, and this ain’t that, Jamie. You know that.”
“I do, Kenneth. But it’s so much fun, though,” she purred, still slightly tipsy. “You have someone, don’t you? You’ve never had a problem with this in all the time we’ve been creeping.”
He smiled at her. “You got me. It’s something like that.”
“I knew it,” she giggled. “So now who’s being bad?”
“I guess that would be us both.”
“I guess it would be. And since that’s the case, then how about one for the road since you’re cutting me off after this?” she posed.
It took Kenneth less than two minutes before he re-dressed his man meat, reached for the handcuffs, and got ready for his and Jamie’s last rodeo.
FOUR
Alika
November 2, 2014
I had just finished pulling my braids into a cute ponytail atop my head, and was ready to embrace the day. When I walked into the living room area from the back of the suite, Rush was on the other side of the room flipping through the channels. I stopped to stare at him in action. I didn’t want to say anything just yet, I only wanted to watch. I couldn’t help myself. He was everything to be not just admired, but desired as well. Without even putting a ton of effort behind his actions, he always managed to make me feel as special as a newborn baby being introduced to its parents for the first time. He had given me the best birthday gift of my life—my entire life. I mean, just when I thought things couldn’t get much better, we went to see Fantasmic! in Frontierland last night, and if there is a stronger word than, ‘magical’, to describe it, please let me know what it is! Who’s ever idea it was to bring forth entertainment where you could witness the forces of good and evil doing battle…it was nothing short of brilliant. I was like a groupie out there watching that show! I don’t even know if I blinked more than twice! It was like watching a movie off of the screen and in living color on the water, at that! On the damn water! I couldn’t contain my excitement, even though a few times I tried to pull it all back so I wouldn’t embarrass myself in front of the man I loved. I might’ve even shed a tear or ten. The best part about it was that Fantasmic! wasn’t the only water show! And even though I couldn’t imagine anything being as beautiful as Fantasmic! I was eager to visit the one at California Dreaming…before seeing Fantasmic! again. After all the excitement of both parks, our plan was to return to Downtown Disney where would shut the night down at House of Blues.
As I gushed over the entire scene in my mind, my eyes never left the man who had made it all possible. The more my thoughts roamed, the wider the smile on my face spread. Minutes later, Rush turned in my direction and smiled upon the realization that I’d been admiring him.
“What, babe?”
“Look at you,” I said, making my way over to him and straddling his lap. I grabbed the remote from his hands and set it aside, then pulled his face to mine. “I need you to give me those lips right now, Mr. Cambridge.”
He smiled, and responded with, “Anything you want.”
When that man smiled at me, my heart fluttered. It was the level of intensity I felt with him that brought about that reaction. In this lifetime that I’d lived, I had never felt anything like it. I kissed him like my life depended on it, while his hands roamed the entire stretch of my back, then around the curve of my ass where he pulled me even closer to him. In that erotic moment, it was appreciation, it was admiration, and it was an overall feeling that I had found the one who had me captured and mesmerized. I couldn’t help but give into the passion of our tongues sliding across one another’s slow and soft. After many, many, long moments, we broke from what felt like a trance. I pulled back slightly, still breathing both his air and mine, and caressed the fine hairs that made up his beard.
“I still can’t believe that you brought me here for my birthday.”
I fought back tears of joy. My reaction to his gesture might’ve seemed juvenile to most, but there I was at the happiest place on earth with the man I adored. And I was there because he’d listened to me back when we first met and I told him that Disneyland had always been somewhere I wanted to go.
“I don’t know why not. I saw the sparkle in your eye when we talked about it. I was dying to make it happen,” he admitted.
“That’s so sweet.”
“And so are you, Alika.”
We grew quiet for a few seconds, I’m sure for different reasons, but then I broke the silence.
“So baby…”
“Yes,” he answered, rubbing his finger along the bottom of my chin.
“I wanna know what’s going through your mind. You’re ninety-eight percent here. I’ve been a part of you for a minute, and in my quest to be all I can be to you, for you, I’ve watched.”
A slanted smile crept upon his face. “Okay…and…?” he said, turning his head suspiciously, and looking at me out of the corner of his eye.
“And I’ve gotten pretty good at identifying when something is wrong. I know that we still have a day left in the celebration, and that it’s probably the reason you haven’t brought up anything, but I need you to tell me.”
“Babe, it’s okay. Let’s just enjoy the last day, and any open items that we need to discuss, can happen after we make it back.”
I gave him a side eye glance, and when he didn’t flinch even a little bit, I decided to let it go. I trusted him to tell me whatever needed to be said whenever he was ready.
“As long as you know that I’m not gonna forget. So don’t go trying to be slick and keep it to yourself.”
“It’s all good, babe.”
Rush never commented in a way of denial, so I knew what that meant. Even though he hadn’t told me yet, I suspected that it had something to do with his family because right before we left for Anaheim, his sister was trying to reach him on the house phone. She called several times, back to back, and each time it was clear that she was attempting to hide the urgency behind her voice. She sounded panicked, and when I mentioned to Rush that she wanted to speak with him…come to think of it…he hadn’t responded.
After I left to get my hair braided and returned back home, it was time for us to head to our trip, so the subject was never broached again. But I would get the truth sooner or later because I hated knowing that something was bothering him and he was going through it presumably alone. Family-related or not, I would be prying because at the end of the day, I was now his family as well.
FIVE
Rush
November 3, 2014
On the flight home from Anaheim, Alika’s excitement was still tipping the scales. It was cute to see her in such a space. She couldn’t say enough about the water shows, the views from our suite’s balcony, the food, and how she wanted to go back in the summer. All I could think about was how much she would regret that statement when we did take the trip in the summer. Disneyland in the summer was not just ridiculously crowded, it was scorching. Fall was much better. We were able to dress comfortably, and the lines weren’t three hours long! But hey, whatever she wanted, I was determined to see that she got it. So if summertime was when she thought she wanted to go, then summertime would be when she’d be there.
There was so much to do when we did finally land. It would be back to business as usual. I had to check in with Oscar to see if he had made progress with finding Janae. Wow. Just thinking about that hits me in the heart with a heavy pang. Nine years lost. If I did find her there was no guarantee that she would want our child to have anything to do with me. Wow, there it is again…my child. I have a child out there in the world that I made with someone. I’d been in so much shock about it that I’d allow
ed my feelings to numb up on me. As anxious as I was, I had no idea where any of it would go, if or when Oscar located her. It could very well be that she’s married by now to someone who has assumed responsibility for Hunter. It could very well be that she hates me to the core and has already prepared for battle should the day ever come where we had to discuss matters as they pertained to our daughter. There was no telling what I was walking into. But what I did know with every fiber of my being was that there would be no man or woman, no time or space that would keep me from seeking her out. If for no other reason than to let her know that when she was of age and wanted answers, where she could find me.
Shit, I sighed. This shit is heavy, was all I could think. It was…heavy as damn concrete. I knew that I needed to gear up for what could possibly be a battle royal.
When we drove through the gates, Alika’s head lifted from the headrest and she looked around as though she was in foreign territory. I chuckled at her as the realization hit her that we were back to our reality. And as if on cue, I immediately went into business mode about all the pending items that needed my attention. I had to have a collective bi-weekly staff meeting, Alika and her assistant manager needed to sit down with their team, and I also had to go over financials with my new business manager, Davis. I was sure that Gigi had an earful for me. She knew not to contact me in Anaheim unless it was urgent, but I was willing to bet my last dollar that Jamie had tried pleading her case to Gigi knowing that Gigi was a direct line to me. Which also meant that Gigi was probably in the know about everything by now. Which also meant that now was probably as good a time as any to fill Alika in.
Rapture 2: a BWWM, Alpha Male Romance Page 3