by Rue Volley
“Nothing to say, huh Josh?” I asked, with as much sarcasm as I could muster up.
He shrugged his shoulders and made the biggest mistake he could of… he grinned.
“What…? What are you grinning about…? I bet you knew! I bet you were the one who told him that Theodore could do it!”
He straightened up. “I did not… Johnathan will tell you that he asked Theodore, without any help from me.”
I turned back to Johnathan. “Is that true?” I asked him.
“Yes it is Rue. Listen I want you to know that I'm doing this for us.”
“Ha!” I blurted out. “No... no, no, you are NOT doing this for US because US did not come up with this crap. YOU did.”
He reached for my hand and I took it from him.
“I don't think so,” I muttered.
“Rue. Why are you so mad?” He asked.
“Because Johnathan... My PARENTS are dead!” I looked around the room. “Yea… that's right. I know it, just because no one wants to say it, doesn't change the fact that it is what it is... and you…” I turned, with my finger pointed at his chest. “Just throw away what you have, like it doesn't matter...”
I started towards the door and looked back at Sam. “Give me a blade.”
She blinked. “What?”
“Give me a damn blade Sam!” I held my hand out… dead serious expression on my face. She pulled the blade from her leg strap, under her pants, and handed it to me. I held it up and then pointed it at all of them, in turn.
“I'm going to the library, or maybe I'm not, my choice…! If I see anybody dressed in white or with glowing palms, I'm stabbing first and asking questions later. So I would suggest that you all back the hell off of me for a little while. Got Me?”
I got a room of nods and I slammed the door behind me.
“Okay, yeah... she's really pissed,” Kai said.
***
I stood on the porch for a moment, looking out at the street. I slipped the blade in the front pouch of my hoodie, and put my shades back on, stomping off, ears up. I made it two blocks, before I actually started to cry. I had to sit down on the curb and I buried my face in my knees. I hit that ‘kid trying to catch his breath part’ when I heard tires pull up in front of me and realized it was Sara's car. She jumped out and came around to me, kneeling down.
“Ohhh, whats going on girlie?” she asked, obviously concerned.
I looked up and saw her pink glittery shoes and had to smile. She pulled my sunglasses down, to reveal red eyes and she sat down next to me.
“Is it boy stuff girl?” she asked, with disgust in her voice.
I sniffled and she wiped a tear that was lingering on my cheek.
“Something like that, I guess,” I answered… so far from the truth.
“Ohh... let’s go shopping!” she crooned.
“What? No, I don't want to…”
She stood up, with me attached to her arm, dragging me up with her.
“I'll tell you, buying something is the best when you got the cries,” she said grinning.
“I… I don't have any money on me Sara,” I said, trying to stop her plan.
“Ohhh… no worries.” She reached in to her car and pulled out a credit card, all shiny and new. “I got a new toy! I guess my Dad feels guilty for being away so much. So... when he got home yesterday, he gave me this to play with. I won't lie, it's good to be out of the ‘baby doll’ category! Honestly Rue, one more doll and I would have buried myself in them and just starved to death, I swear!”
I grinned, it was fake but I had to, it was Sara.
“I told everyone I was going to the library Sara.” Really, I had left my options open.
“I'm not taking NO as an answer. You left me here all summer with nothing to do, now we go play.”
She had a huge grin on her face and waved the card like chocolate at me.
“What the hell, let’s go,” I said, as I got into the car.
We drove to the only hot spot in town for shopping. It consisted of shop after shop, with fun names like “The Dollhouse” and “Tea Party”. Truth was, I avoided these places, I had always gone straight to “Lucy's Last Chance Thrift.” I love the idea of picking up clothing someone else thought was past its importance. Kinda like finding a stray kitty. Plus, it didn't hurt that Lucy always had a great story and cookies, lots of homemade ones, which I ate without protest every time I went in there.
Today is ‘Sara day’ though, so I am letting her lead. We hit the “Dollhouse” first. I stepped in and chimes went off at the door. I looked up and noticed the pink bells chiming. Sara sighed, like she was in heaven and started towards the dress section. I stood still, looking around. The walls were painted like we were in a house, fake windows had been neatly painted with blue sky and hills in them. The clothes were suedo trendy, but looked a little Easter eggish in color. I stopped when I heard a growl at my feet. I looked down to see a small poodle standing his ground. I went to lean down to pet it and it barked at me and trotted to its owner, a petite woman, dressed in baby blue head to toe. I looked up and she had scooped him up, giving him kisses.
I smiled. “Sorry, I think I scared your dog,” I said to her.
“NO… oh no... my Boo Boo here does not get frightened, he just loves his mama.” She kissed him again and then “Boo Boo” started to kiss her lips. I had to look away, because it just… well, you know. Gross.
Sara called out to me, “OMG… lookie Rue!” I turned, as she held up a short light gray skirt that looked like it had strips on, it in an eclectic pattern. It had a tiny ruffle at the bottom. Obviously a mini skirt, not so much my style.
I grinned. “Yea, it's cute, you should try it on.”
“No… I think it would look so awesome on you Rue!”
“Ohh…” I knew I wouldn't win.
She came over and grabbed my arm, herding me towards the fitting room. “Boo Boo” growled at me as I passed him. “I know,” I muttered, just letting him know I didn't think that I had any business being here either. Sara gave me the skirt and piled in five or six more things that she had found for me. She pulled the curtain and I stood there. I looked into the mirror and started to laugh. No matter why Boo Boo growled at me, I looked like a child's nightmare with those ears up. I took my hoodie off and my sunglasses and I started to pull things on, one at a time. Sara wanted a fashion show so I kept getting pulled out to model. I got mostly “Ahhhs.” One “Oh… maybe not” and then of course… the “must have” when I stepped out with the gray skirt on. I looked down at my red chucks.
“I like it with the shoes,” I said as I looked back up, just in time to receive the look of disgust from Boo Boo's mama, but Sara agreed with me, I think she did, just so I would accept it from her.
“Alright, the skirt it is,” I said.
Sara grinned big time.
We paid… well, Sara's card paid at the counter and we headed out to our next stop. Sara turned to me. “Okay Rue… this is the most amazing store in the entire world.”
I had to respond, “The ‘entire’ world?”
She nodded and we headed into “Tea Party”.
I don't know what I expected... well, yes I did. I thought it would be some crazy, over girlie store, with tea tables and stuff. It actually was pretty cool. I think the owner must be a huge Alice fan or does some type of drugs. The walls had black and white spirals on them, painted over purple. The counter was a huge hat and a very large, not so friendly looking, rabbit sat right in the middle of the store. I walked up to it and had to look up. Its eyes were glowing red and it almost looked as if it had fangs. I started to flash to the memory of a blade being slammed into and Sara knocked me out of my memory.
“OMG... RUE… come here!”
Sara said it low so that the other two customers in the store would not hear her. I guess she was afraid she'd be forced to fight. I gave one last look at monster bunny and headed her way. She turned around, holding up the coolest dress I think I have ever
seen. I tried not to stare at it too girl like, but it was hard. It was black and white striped with a big red belt on it. You could barely see outlines of bunnies adorning the stripes of black, they were just a bit lighter. It just hung on the hanger all loose, and the neck looked as if it was cut too big. I had to try it on… had to. I took it and headed for the fitting room. Sara skipped behind me.
I slipped the dress on and adjusted the belt. It hung off one shoulder. I stood there staring at it on me, just shocked that I looked so cute. I stepped up to the mirror and noticed that every rabbit had a top hat on. Sweet.
Sara called out to me, “Well?” I stepped out and her jaw hit the floor.
“Holy crap Rue…! It looks like it was made for you,” she said with way too much excitement.
Truth was, I agreed. I loved it. I had no idea that a dress would seduce me, but it did. I looked at the price tag. It was expensive. I looked back up at Sara.
“This is way too much Sara,” I whispered.
“Get out!” She grinned. “You are getting that dress, period.”
I almost said no but something in me said just do it. This dress cost more than I had ever spent at Lucy's. I turned to go back in to change and Sara stopped me. “Just pull your clothes out Rue, keep the dress on.” I reached in and grabbed my stuff. I had to wrap my borrowed blade in my hoodie. We paid at the counter and we got a bag to put my previous choice in it. I walked out, a believer in how cool this place was… first time ever.
We stepped onto the sidewalk and I immediately noticed that Josh was leaning on the side of the building. Sara saw him too. She has ‘guy-dar’ there are many ‘dars’, ‘radar’ being the main one, but ‘guy-dar’ is Sara's specialty.
Sara stopped and smiled. “Hello Josh!” she said to him.
Josh grinned and pushed himself from the wall.
“Hey… shopping huh?”
I looked everywhere but him, Sara on the other hand stepped right up.
“Yea… just look at what we found for Rue... amazing right?”
Josh looked at me. “I like it,” he added.
I looked at him and grabbed Sara's arm. “Well, we have more places to go, see ya.”
I tried to move us forward, but Sara resisted. “Hey Josh… you wanna come with us?” I had been stopped when Sara tugged at me. I kept my back to him, just waiting.
“Yea, sure… I'll hang out.” I heard him say. I sighed.
I walked on Sara's right side and Josh at her left. I kept catching him looking over at me while Sara just chatted away, about what, I don't know.
“Let’s go to Coffee,” she said, all excited.
Now I heard that and had to agree. “Sounds good, Sara,” I responded.
Sara spotted Coffee across the street and jogged across between traffic. Josh and I stood there watching cars.
“Nice dress,” Josh said to me.
“I thought I made it clear that I would stab a protector,” I said, waving to Sara on the other side. I had a fake grin on my face.
“I'm not wearing white and my palms are not glowing Rue.”
I shot him a look, as he held his palms up to me. I sighed and saw a break in traffic. I started to jog across, but I didn't notice the truck coming at me. I heard a horn blow and felt myself get picked up at the waist, and ran to the curb in a hurry. Josh set me down and grinned at me.
Sara screamed out, “Oh my god! Rue, are you okay?”
I didn't have time to look scared and to tell you the truth, I didn't feel that way either. I looked at her and faked a reaction. “Oh god, yeah, wow... that was crazy.”
Josh stood there waiting for me to thank him. I didn't want to, but I did.
“Thanks Josh,” I said half halfhearted.
Sara decided to award him for his bravery. “Coffee is on me Josh!”
She turned and started for the entrance, Josh and I lagged behind after her.
“You should have let it hit me. My body would have stopped it dead like some sci-fi movie Josh.”
He laughed. “No, I don't think so Rue.”
I laughed. “You don't know.”
We entered Coffee and scanned the room. Every teenager was there as usual. Sara was at the counter hooking us up. I turned to look for a booth and there was the rest of my dysfunctional family, sitting in the one we claimed the last time. I looked at Josh. “Why is everyone here?”
“Well, I called them. I figured that you two would end up here, after your shopping spree.”
“So… you were spying on me?” I asked.
“Well I wouldn't call it ‘spying’ so much,” he said with a smirk on his face.
“Huh... what part of ‘leave me the hell alone’ didn't I just scream.” I had to stop when Sara came up with our drinks.
“Here we go...! Oh look Rue!” She looked towards the booth. “Awesome!” she added.
I took my drink from her and sucked down a quarter of it… causing a brain freeze. I pressed my fingers to my forehead and hissed. Josh leaned in close to my ear. “Glutton for punishment, huh?”
“Oh shut up,” I whispered.
Everyone scooted over and I took a spot next to Sara, across from Johnathan. I had not made eye contact with him yet, I didn't want to. The longer I could be mad, the better. I kept sipping on my drink… not being so aggressive as to bring on another headache.
I looked up and Johnathan was looking back at me. I knew he wanted to talk. I didn't want to hear it. I couldn't imagine what he could say, that would change my mind about just how stupid I thought he was.
“Do you want to go for a ride with me... Rue?”
I looked up and melted. The look on his face was the kind of ‘puppy in the window’ crap I always fell for. “Don't think so,” I said, fidgeting with my drink.
He lowered his voice. “Please?” he added.
Oh crap.
I looked over to see that Josh was in the conversation and I didn't even know it.
“She said No Johnathan,” he said… staring him in the eye.
“I think this is between me and Rue… Josh.” Johnathan had straightened up in his seat.
I bit my lip. I didn't need this.
“Fine… fine, Johnathan… let’s go,” I said.
I stood up and glanced at Josh, who still had his eyes fixed on Johnathan.
“Hey?” I reached down and touched Johnathan's arm. He looked up at me and pushed himself up. “We'll meet everyone at the library after a while, okay?”
No one protested, including Josh, which kinda surprised me. Johnathan reached for my hand and I grabbed my bag… heading for the door. He rushed to open my car door and I let him. He got in his side and started it up. I didn't say anything and neither did he.
We drove in silence until we pulled into Red Woods and parked. I grinned.
“Are you trying to get me in the mood?” I asked.
He turned the key and shut the car off, no music this time. He kept his hands on the wheel and then smiled. “Maybe,” he said under his breath.
“Well, this is cheating,” I said, as I took a sip from my drink.
He reached over and took the drink out of my hand and placed it in the holder.
“Hey! Taking my frap is a dangerous thing Johnathan!” I said with as much anger as I could which wasn't a lot.
“Listen to me Rue…”
I’d never heard that tone in his voice, so I stopped joking.
“Okay Johnathan I will give you one shot to make your case, make it good.”
He sighed and looked out the window
“I don't want you to think that I am a bad person, someone who takes things for granted. Truth is, maybe there was a time when I just didn't care where I was going. I do come from money and things have never been difficult for me, not really anyway. I went to Barrington because my Mother and I don’t get along, we never did. She has always looked at me like I was a stranger, we don't relate at all. As far as Sophie goes, we don't talk either. My Dad is never home, ever. Well, I don
't even know if he is my Dad… but anyway, I don't want that life. I don't, not now, not with you in my life now. After the library I thought about it… I did, but after Mikah, I just know where I belong and it's by your side Rue. I'm going to do it, whether you want me with you or not. I just want to be close to you, even if it's just to help protect you… forever, if you'll let me. Now, you can hate me. I know you would have your reasons… not having your parents has to be awful for you and I don't want you to think that I am just throwing away something you cannot have, when I am trying to give you something more.”
I don't know when I started to cry it wasn't anything but tears running down my cheeks. I reached up to wipe them away and he grabbed my hand and wiped them for me. I looked at him… really did for the first time. I looked past the cute and the hot, and just looked at him. There he was, opening himself up to me, knowing that it might not go his way. I might get out of the car and tell him to go to hell he didn't know, but he was willing to lay it all out for me. Give everything up for me. give his life if he had to... for me.
“Johnathan,” I whispered.
He pulled my hand up to his mouth and kissed my palm. I kept my eyes fixed on him. He leaned towards me and gently put his mouth to mine. This was the first kiss… the one that makes your stomach flip and your head go light. I kept my eyes closed, hoping it would last forever. He pulled me into his lap and I put my head against his chest. He held me close to him, without saying a word. I could hear his heart beating. It wasn't fast. It was slow and steady like an engine. I closed my eyes and let it fill my ears. I could listen to it the rest of my life.
We both jumped when a thud hit the hood. We looked out the front windshield to see Kai and Josh standing there, I got off of his lap and we both got out of the car. Josh stood with his hands in his pockets, looking at me. Kai had to talk, because I think he'd die if he couldn't.
“So we doing this or what Johnathan?” he waited, with his eyes wide open.
Johnathan and I looked at each other and Johnathan confirmed. “Yea… we are.”
He reached his hand out to me and I took it. He squeezed my hand as we watched Theodore and Sam pull up next to us.
Sam jumped out and started to pull a large wall mirror out of the back of the car. She paused. “Why the hell am I carrying this? Come here!” she said with a lot of irritation in her voice. She had looked to Kai and Josh, they walked to her and grabbed it… dragging it out. The edge hit the ground.