by Rue Volley
I grinned and looked up at her.
“I do… He makes me feel normal,” I said.
“I think that is good,” she said as she shifted in the chair.
I wiggled my fingers and walked to the bed. I sat down on the edge and looked at the floor.
“How are you feeling today, Rue?” she asked me.
I bit my lip and started to move my feet.
“Peaceful,” I said to her.
“Did you enjoy the atrium today?” she asked me.
I looked at her and nodded.
“Yea, I really like it there.”
“Good. It is a beautiful place to think,” she said.
I scooted back on my bed and leaned on the headboard.
“Did you see the boy?” she asked me.
I blushed. Why, I do not know. Maybe it was because I thought about his mouth all the time.
I looked at her and shook my head no.
“He wasn’t there today, only me and Blake,” I said as I crossed my feet.
I thought about Blake crossing his feet and undid mine.
“Did you and Blake talk?” she asked me.
I looked at the ceiling and then back to her.
“Yea, we had a riveting conversation about fish,” I said as I grinned.
“Fish?” she asked me.
“Yea… the ones in the fountain,” I said.
“Oh,” she said as she wrote something down on her paper.
I leaned forward.
“Is fish a bad thing?” I asked her.
She looked up at me and smiled.
“No, should they be?” she asked me.
I leaned back and sighed.
“Sorry, I just thought that you were writing something down about me.”
“Oh, I was.” She held her clipboard up to her face and read to me, “Rue Volley: Showing promise in herself and her ability to converse with a boy intern. Today had riveting conversation about the fish in the fountain.”
I laughed. “Oh that sounds sane,” I said to her.
She lowered her clipboard.
“You should think of yourself lightly,” she said.
I stopped and looked at her.
“What did you say?” I asked her.
“Think of yourself lightly… It’s an old saying, don’t know where it came from, but I always liked it. Reminds me that there are bigger things than myself,” she said.
I relaxed and looked at my hands.
“I like that; I like it a lot,” I said.
Holly stood up and walked to the side of my bed.
“Why don’t you rest some? We can talk again tomorrow, okay?” she asked me.
I nodded to her and she walked to the door and started to turn the handle.
“Holly?” I asked her.
She turned and looked at me.
“Whatever meds you have me on… I like them a lot better,” I said.
She smiled and stepped out of my room.
I got up and walked back to my window. I watched as a bird swooped into a tree and landed in a nest. God, to have a home… other than this place. I needed to get out of there, make my own nest… or maybe I already have one. Who knew… I certainly couldn’t remember. I mean everything had a home. This couldn’t be mine.
I grinned as I thought about Blake. Going home every day, maybe to his own nest. Could I be a part of that? Is he serious? I mean how could he be, right? I was sitting there… crazy girl, flipping out, no memory of who I am. How could anyone like that?
I heard my door open and I looked over. I sat up quickly and the boy turned. You know, the one. I blinked a couple of times and adjusted my shirt. How funny. I was in pajamas, or the equivalent of them.
I scooted on the side of the bed and watched him grin at me. Oh god. He is in my room. I hoped he wasn’t in there to kill me. I swallowed hard and he took a step towards me. I scooted back. He held out his hands and grinned at me. There are those canine teeth, all white and crooked. I got stuck looking at them for a moment.
“Ummm… Hi,” I said as I stared at him.
“Hi,” he said.
“What are you… ah, doing in my room?” I asked him.
Legitimate question, right?
He laughed.
“Oh, you have claimed this as your own, huh?” he asked me.
“Well, I don’t have much of a choice, do I?” I asked him.
He walked to the bed and sat down.
He is right here, right in my face. Oh god.
“You have all the choices you want,” he said to me.
I tilted my head and he kept his eyes on me. I cleared my throat and looked at my hands.
“Do I make you uncomfortable?” he asked me.
Oh god, does he.
I feel my hands tingling and my chest thudding. I would have loved to jump on him and kiss his mouth, but how crazy right? I was just starting to feel okay, just getting to the point where I could function without freaking out.
He reached over and touched my face. I sucked my breath in. I didn’t mean to, it just happened. He grinned again. I shook my head at him and scooted off the bed. I started to pace in the room. I glanced at him and kept wringing my hands.
“I don’t think you are real,” I said.
He leaned back on my bed and tapped it.
I looked at him and placed my hands on my hips.
“What do you want?” I asked him.
He placed his hands behind his head and smiled big. He looked at me and at the bed.
“Oh… oh you have got to be kidding right?” I said.
I continued to pace.
“I don’t even know you,” I said.
He leaned up and looked at me.
“You want to know me though… right?” he asked me.
“Yea, yes I do, but not like that!” I said to him.
He laughed and shook his head.
“Don’t lie,” he said.
“What...? You don’t know me either!” I said.
“I want too,” he said.
I laughed.
“Oh god, these meds are freakin’ me out; maybe I was wrong to tell Holly that I liked them. I mean here you are… and I can’t believe it. I thought about you every moment since I met you in the atrium, but you were not even there! I waited today and nothing… You don’t…”
He grabbed me; I didn’t even see him get off of my bed. He held my face and at first I struggled, but then I relaxed while he stared at me. He leaned in and kissed me softly on the mouth. I relaxed and let him do it. His kiss was so sweet, so real. My head started to feel light and my knees buckled.
He picked me up and laid me on the bed. I looked up at him and he started to take his shirt off. I watched his skin. He looked amazing. I felt my heart flip in my chest. He lay down next to me and cupped my face. I stared into his eyes and waited. If this is all in my head then so be it. I want him to touch me.
He brushed my hair behind my ear and I closed my eyes. I felt his mouth close to mine. I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his. I wrapped my arms around him tightly and just wanted to sink into him forever.
I felt his hand on my lower back; it slid up slowly until it cupped the back of my head. He moaned in my mouth and I wrapped my leg around him. I could feel him shaking; I was too. I had no idea what we were doing, but it felt so right… so real; I could have done it forever. I continued to kiss him as his other hand slid to the front of my shirt. He started to unbutton it. I let him. I just hoped it wouldn’t end.
I got lost in the moment and then heard someone clear their throat.
I opened my eyes with my shirt hanging open, my leg wrapped around one pillow, and the other pillow in my face. I sat up quickly and squeezed my pillow to my chest. Blake stood there and rubbed his hand through his hair. He turned quickly and I just died… died… died.
“Ummm, it’s time to go for meds,” he said.
I looked at the pillow and sighed as I squeezed my eyes shut.
Holy crap. Ho
ly crap. Holy crap. I was not just making out with my pillow, right?
I cleared my throat and took the only road I could. The crazy one.
“Sounds great,” I said as my voice cracked.
“Okay then… Ummm, just come out when… ah, you have your clothes on, k?” he said.
Blake closed my door and I threw my pillow off the bed.
“OMG,” I muttered. Then I crinkled my eyebrows at the fact that I just said that.
Where the hell did I get ‘OMG’ anyway? I’ve never said that, have I?
I stood up and buttoned my shirt up. I brushed my fingers through my hair. I stood there and shook my hands out and sighed really loud. I have to get it together. I mean… Blake is a real possibility right...? Hot boy, was not. Oh god. I might have just ruined any chances I’d had at a shot with normal.
I stepped up to the door and opened it up. I looked at Blake and grinned.
“Okay. Let’s get some meds,” I said all normal.
He grinned and took my hand. I looked down at his hand and kind of felt a sense of relief that he didn’t care that he just caught me humping my bed. Oh god… humping my bed… really? Crap.
Chapter 5
Idiot With Needs
Josh sat straight up and took a deep breath. He scrambled to his feet and grabbed his blades. He started walking, pissed… totally pissed. He kept smacking his blade against his leg. It didn’t hurt, but it should have. He stopped when he heard laughing behind him.
He turned and pointed his blade.
“Not now,” Josh yelled.
Johnathan stood there grinning big, obnoxiously big.
Well, the kind of grin you would like to smack off the face of people sometimes.
“I hate to say I told ya so, but…”
“Johnathan, I swear to god, shut up!” Josh said as he paced.
Johnathan sat down and leaned back on his elbows.
“You saw that, right?” he said.
Josh stopped and looked at him, shaking his head.
“What...? Blake? Yea, you ass, I did,” Josh said tapping the butt of his blade to his forehead.
“I said she liked him, now do you believe me?” Johnathan said as he picked up some leaves and crumpled them in his hand.
“Dude… I saw him, but that doesn’t mean that she likes him. That whole place is in her head. She is just pulling people in that she remembers… Well, she doesn’t remember them; she is just…ahhhh,” Josh yelled out as he sat down and dropped his blades.
Johnathan laughed as he sat up.
“I tried to tell you, but no… You were all like, ‘She doesn’t like Blake… He took advantage of her’,” Johnathan said as he waved his hands around in the air.
Josh looked at him, with his head low. He pointed to him.
“You, I like you better in real life… memory Johnathan is a dick.”
Johnathan grinned as he pushed himself up.
“Hey, I am what you see in your head. This is what you get, maybe you should have liked me better… I wouldn’t even be here if you didn’t bring me.”
Josh pushed himself up and clinched his fists. Rue still lingered on his skin.
He looked at Johnathan and Johnathan shook his head.
“I do not swing that way, dude,” he said.
Josh laughed. “Oh please, if I did like boys… and I do not in that way, you would be the last person I would want to hump.”
Johnathan leaned forward.
“I think that you do like me; that’s where all this anger comes from. Maybe it’s not Rue you are after.”
“Oh for fucks sake… please,” Josh said as he shook his head.
“No really, they say that you are attracted to what reminds you of you.”
Josh looked at him.
“You do not remind me of anything but an ass… Not a good ass even… a bad ass, on a bad day.”
“I agree; I am a bad ass,” Johnathan said as he picked up his blades and put them on his back.
Josh snorted. He didn’t mean too… but the thought that Johnathan was even there taunting him was just ironic in so many ways.
“Shut up,” Josh said as he started to walk. Johnathan followed him.
Josh looked back and shook his head at him.
“What...? Are you like my sidekick now?” he asked him.
Johnathan laughed.
“I am no sidekick… I am the main man.”
Josh stopped and looked at him.
“You?” he asked as he grinned.
“Yea me… why not?” Johnathan asked.
Josh laughed so hard he held his side.
“You are not a, what did you call it...? ’A main man’,” he said as he caught his breath.
Johnathan pulled his blades and stared at him. Josh looked up at him and smiled.
“No… no fighting. I am getting the hell out of here, no more trial crap,” he said.
Johnathan tilted his head at him.
“What do you mean?” he asked.
“Just what I said… I am finding a way out of here.”
Josh started to walk and Johnathan looked at his blades. He let his arms relax and sped up to catch up with him. He leaned over and looked at Josh as they walked.
“You can’t do that,” he said.
Josh shook his head and grinned.
“Bet your ass I am,” he muttered.
“No… you don’t control trial… trial controls you!” Johnathan said as he touched Josh’s arm.
Josh stopped and turned to him.
“Listen… imaginary Johnathan, I am not doing this crap. I am finding a way out.”
Johnathan shook his head at him.
“How do you plan on getting out of here?” he asked him.
“Oh I don’t know… maybe I will just rip a hole in the universe,” Josh said.
“So… you do love her,” Johnathan said as he stared at his blades.
Josh grabbed his arm and dragged him along.
“Yes… I do. Now come on… at least I will have someone to talk to.”
Johnathan crinkled his eyebrows.
“Well, I’m glad that I can come to some use!” he said all sarcastically.
Josh smiled and pulled him along with him.
***
Sam stood there tapping her foot and staring the mirror down in the library. She looked back at Theodore and shook her head at him. Theodore sighed and looked back at the black book. Sam came walking over to him and slammed her hands on the table.
“Where are they?” she asked Theodore.
He looked up and closed the book, keeping it marked with his finger.
“Why do you ask me...? As if I know why it is taking so long?”
Sam sighed and dropped down in the chair; she looked at the ceiling as she leaned the chair back, making an annoying creaking noise.
Theodore closed the book again and looked at her.
“Listen, love, I am sure that Johnathan and Brooke are fine. They had one mission at hand.”
Sam stopped creaking her chair and stared at him.
“I’m going in,” she said as she stood up and walked to the mirror.
Theodore jumped up and flashed to her. He placed his hand on her arm and leaned in.
“Please, Samantha… do not.”
Sam looked at him and saw that Theodore looked truly upset.
It was unlike him. Normally he would wave his hand and allow her to do as she wanted.
She touched his hand and sighed.
“Please, Theodore, you have to trust in my ability. You should have sent me to begin with. Johnathan and Brooke are human, well… Johnathan is partially. Memory is a dangerous place for their kind. We have enough trouble with it ourselves.”
Theodore took a deep breath.
“I would ask that you give them just a little bit more time… Please, I am asking you.”
Theodore tightened his grip on Sam’s arm and she looked at it.
She lowered her head and shook it.
>
“They could be in big trouble; you do know that, right?” she asked him.
Theodore nodded and loosened his grip on her.
“I understand, but I do not think that I can handle anymore loss… I apologize for my emotions.”
Sam hugged him and laughed.
“Oh Theo, I knew you were a softy. I feel the same way! I miss Josh so much, and I am terribly worried for Rue.”
She pulled back from him and he cleared his throat. He waved his hand.
“Yes… just as you said.”
Sam smiled and walked to the door.
“I will give it one more day… that is it. After that I am going in.”
“Agreed,” Theodore said as he watched her walk out of the room.
He looked back at his book and sat down at the table.
He flipped it open and rubbed his fingers on his forehead.
“What is the delay?” he whispered as he peeked at the mirror.
***
Sam flashed home. She had not even bothered with a car. She stopped in the yard and saw Kai standing there, looking at the forest.
“What are you doing?” she asked him.
He looked at her and shrugged his shoulders.
“Thinking about going to Valon.”
Sam walked up to him and put her hand in his.
“Well, that isn’t a very smart thing to be planning,” she said as she smiled at him.
“I just… I want him back. I mean, Rue is gone and he is gone. Sara is in the house all messed up. I just want it to go back to the way it was,” Kai said as he looked back at the forest.
“You go to Valon and you will die. Then what will I do, Kai?” she asked him.
Kai looked at her and grinned.
“You are the hottest girl I have ever seen. I am sure that you won’t have any trouble finding someone,” he said as he bit his lip.
She slapped him on the arm.
“I don’t want just anyone, you jerk!” she said.
He tried to dodge her, but it didn’t work.
“Owww… come on,” he said as he laughed.
Sam stepped in front of him and wrapped her arms around him.
“Listen to me, you stupid boy… I want you here with me,” she whispered.
Kai grinned and looked everywhere but at her.
“Uh huh… sure,” he said
“I do… I want you here,” she said, a little more serious.