by Liz Isaacson
The guy he’d hired over the summer had started a lot of it, and Gray was glad he was coming in after the work had begun. Matt Whettstein was a good cowboy, and he’d said Gray could call on him again.
Gray had been back on the farm for six weeks now, and his birthday was coming up in two more. He’d been meaning to tell Elise, but something else always came up. Tonight, it was Gray’s sheer exhaustion. That, and Hunter still hadn’t come in from his evening chores, and Gray was going to have to take the boy’s phone again.
He should never have gotten him the blasted thing in the first place. He’d been sitting out in the barn texting when he should’ve been working.
“I’m gonna head out,” he said to his parents. “I’ll see you later, okay?”
“Goodnight, Gray,” Dad said.
“Love you, son,” Mom added, and Gray took the broom to the pantry and propped it against the wall. He left the granny house and began the short walk back to the farmhouse. They were about a hundred yards apart, and because Gray had done his hills that morning, his calves hurt with every step.
“Hunt,” he called as he entered the back door.
“Right here, Dad.” He looked up from his homework at the dining table, literally a few feet from Gray.
He took in the open math book, Hunter’s notes, and his assignment, and his anger faded. He wasn’t really angry. More frustrated. Tired. Fed up with everything, for a reason he couldn’t name.
“Did you get the hay moved?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Goats fed?”
“Yes, sir.”
Gray nodded. “Almost done here?”
“Two more,” he said.
“Good boy, Hunter,” he said, stepping over to him. He took off his cowboy hat and bent down to kiss the top of his son’s head. “I’m going to go shower, and then it’ll be time for bed.”
“Okay.” Hunter went back to his homework, and Gray went down the hall to shower.
He’d been moving furniture, boxes, and belongings for ten straight days. Even on the Sabbath, he hadn’t found any rest. If he wasn’t clearing out his parents’ stuff, he was receiving deliveries of the new things he’d bought for him and Hunter.
He showered, making the water as hot as he could stand. He breathed in the steam, finally finding some relief from the aches and pains in his body.
He dressed in sweats and walked back into the kitchen, expecting to see Hunter’s backpack ready for the next day, the table cleared, and Hunter gone. Instead, he found his son exactly where he’d left him.
“Those last two problems must be impossible,” Gray said.
Hunter flinched and looked up.
“I’ll take it,” Gray said, holding out his hand.
Darkness entered Hunter’s expression, but he handed over his phone.
“Who are you texting?”
“Phil,” Hunter said.
“Finish your math.” Gray looked down at the phone, and sure enough Phil’s name was at the top. “You aren’t erasing texts, right?” He sat down at the table and looked at Hunter.
“No, Dad.”
“Good, because if you do, you’ll lose this thing permanently.”
“I’m not,” Hunter said, shooting him a daggered look.
Gray ignored his son’s attitude and tapped on Phil’s name. He and Hunter had been texting for a solid twenty minutes. First about their history homework. Gray couldn’t be too mad about that, especially because Hunter had helped Phil with the project.
The conversation had quickly moved on to a girl named Rachel. “Who’s Rachel?” he asked, glancing up.
“A girl in our art class,” he said. “Phil likes her.”
“And you’re going to say something to her tomorrow about him?”
Hunter’s face was turning a dark shade of red. “Maybe. If you keep reading, you’ll see it’s up in the air.”
“Oh, I’m going to keep reading.”
“Dad, I’m not doing anything bad.”
“I get to know who you’re talking to,” Gray said. “And what you’re saying.”
“I’m not saying anything wrong.”
“It’s not you I’m worried about,” Gray said, his eyebrows drawing down.
“You know Phil. He’s not saying anything wrong either.”
Gray returned to the conversation, and he finished it. “No, he’s not.”
“Can I have my phone back?”
“Is your math done?”
Hunter closed his book and said, “It is now.”
Gray was just about to hand the phone back when another text came in—from Molly. “Molly texted.” Gray watched Hunter tense, and he didn’t want to tease his son about the girl. He just wanted to make sure they were being good. He’d gone to the dance the first week of school, and he and Molly had danced three times.
Gray had heard all about it as Hunter told Elise over the phone. Otherwise, he probably wouldn’t have gotten a word.
“Should I read it?”
“I don’t care,” Hunter said, folding his arms. He obviously cared, and Gray’s curiosity increased.
He met his son’s eyes. He held his gaze for several long seconds. Then he handed the phone back. “I trust you.”
“Thank you,” Hunter murmured as he took the phone.
“I still want it plugged in out here.”
“As always,” Hunter said, focusing on the device.
“I’m going to bed in twenty minutes,” Gray said. “You should too.”
“Okay, Dad.” Hunter’s thumbs flew across his screen as he responded to Molly.
Twenty minutes later, Hunter got up and plugged his phone into the charger next to the fridge. “’Night, Dad.” He leaned over the back of the couch where Gray sat, and Gray patted his shoulder.
“’Night, bud. Love you.”
“Love you too.” He took a few steps away. “Oh, what are we doing for your birthday?”
Surprise ran through Gray. “What are we doing?”
“Yeah.”
“Do we normally do something?” He switched off the TV and stood up to face his son.
“I mean, we should,” Hunter said. “I need to get you something too.”
“I can talk to Grandma.”
“Actually….” Hunter looked at his feet for a moment, then looked at Gray. He was getting so tall and so grown-up. He looked like a mirror image of Gray at that age, and he knew how his son’s mind worked.
“You want Elise to take you.”
“Yes.”
“I haven’t told her it’s my birthday. She knows it’s in October, but she didn’t ask what day.”
A frown pulled at Hunter’s eyebrows. “Why haven’t you told her?”
Gray shrugged. “Didn’t want to make a big deal out of it. She’ll make a cake I won’t eat, and I don’t want her to feel bad.”
“She’ll feel bad if she can’t celebrate your birthday with you.”
“Yeah, probably.” Gray nodded toward the hall, and they started down it together. “You told her, then?”
“I mentioned it,” Hunter said. “She wanted to know what you wanted.”
“I don’t want anything,” Gray said, actually horrified at the thought of Elise buying him something. “She doesn’t need to get me anything.”
“Right, Dad,” Hunter said, pausing at his door. “Because that’s going to happen.”
“When did you get so sarcastic?”
Hunter blinked at him. “Sorry, Dad. It’s just…I thought you knew more about girls than I did.”
It was Gray’s turn to blink. “What does that mean?”
“It means, Dad, that you and Elise are like, super serious boyfriend and girlfriend, right?”
Gray swallowed. “Right.” Super serious. Hunter wasn’t far off, and Gray thought of the diamond ring he’d bought a few days ago. He hadn’t even taken it out of his truck yet. He’d been busy, for one. And for another, he had no idea where to put it in the farmhouse. Elise hardly ev
er rode in his truck, as she drove her own car out to the farm when she brought Hunter back in the evenings.
“And you honestly think she doesn’t want to get you something? Girls love to give presents. It’s like, what they do.” He shook his head. “You should tell her, and she’ll make a cake out of meat or something. A meat pie. That’s like a cake.”
“Okay,” Gray said.
“Okay.” Hunter nodded like that was done, and he went into his room, pushing the door closed behind him. Gray stared at the white-painted wood, wondering when his son had started requiring the privacy of a closed door.
So many things had changed in the past year, and Gray felt like he couldn’t keep up.
He also wanted to know what Hunter had said to Molly in the last twenty minutes, so he padded back into the kitchen and picked up the phone. The bulk of their conversation was about Halloween and whether or not they’d dress up.
Hunter had never enjoyed dressing up for Halloween all that much, and Gray wasn’t surprised that he’d gently led Molly to the conclusion that they shouldn’t wear costumes to school.
Gray backed out of the text string and tapped on the one below that. Elise. He looked at the timestamps, and sure enough, Hunter had been texting when he should’ve been working.
“With Elise,” he murmured. Gray had a hard time being upset when Hunter did anything with Elise, because he wanted them to have a strong, healthy bond. They did talk about his birthday, and then Gray read a text that made his blood run cold.
I could just ask him for some money, if you want. See what he says, and maybe he’ll give it to you.
He closed his eyes, but he’d already seen the text. He got transported back in time five or six years, and Hunter’s childlike voice asked him for money. When Gray had asked him what it was for, he’d said Maddie. Maddie needed the money.
And now Elise did too.
He dropped the phone as if it had caught fire. His heartbeat throbbed in every muscle and pounded in his ears. He sucked in a breath, trying to find a thought to latch onto. Everything seemed coated in redness, and he grew angrier and angrier with every moment he stood in the kitchen.
He spun away from the counter with the phone with the horrible texts and hurried into his bedroom, where his phone was plugged in. He picked it up and dialed Elise, his breath coming in short bursts.
“Gray, hey,” she said as if nothing was wrong. As if she’d done nothing wrong.
“Elise,” he said, the name grinding in his throat. He’d never felt so betrayed, and he couldn’t say anything else.
“Is everything okay?” she asked.
“No.”
“What’s wrong?”
“I…I—we can’t see each other anymore.”
A moment of silence came through the line. “What?”
“It’s over,” he said, well-aware his voice was icy. “And stay away from my son.”
“Gray,” she said. “What’s going on? Why are you doing this?”
“I saw your texts with him,” Gray said, his whole world crashing down around him. His anger changed to despair in the blink of an eye, and he needed to get off this call before his voice choked up. “Good-bye.”
“Gray,” she said again, but he hung up. He sank onto the bed, his chest so, so tight. He watched the phone darken, and he felt the same thing happen to his soul.
“I loved her,” he whispered to the empty bedroom. His breath hitched, and his head grew too hot.
The phone rang, and Elise’s name sat there. He couldn’t talk to her again. He didn’t know how. He silenced the phone and turned it over.
He just wanted this day to end. He’d never been so tired, so frustrated, and so hurt. He got into bed and turned off the light, wishing sleep to claim him instantly.
It didn’t, and Gray lay there with his eyes closed, Elise’s betrayal burning through him. After what felt like a very long time, he started praying.
Please shoulder this for me, he thought. I can’t deal with this. I don’t even know how. Why did this happen again? Am I really that blind?
“Please help me sleep,” he whispered aloud before he rolled onto his side, where his tears could fall into the pillow.
Gray didn’t sleep well at all, despite his petitions to the Lord. He didn’t get up and run, and when he met Hunter in the kitchen, his son already had that blasted phone in his hand.
“Ready for school?”
“Yeah.” Hunter shoved the phone in his back pocket. “You didn’t run this morning?”
Gray shook his head. “Rest day.” It wasn’t a rest day, and Gray hated that he’d just lied to his son. He’d gotten up so late that he didn’t even have time to make coffee. “Let’s go.”
Hunter followed him out to the garage. “You don’t look good, Dad.”
“Didn’t sleep very well,” Gray said. And that wasn’t a lie. They got going down the road, and Gray mourned the quick eight-minute drive he’d used to have to get Hunter to school.
“Hunt, I’m going to pick you up from school today.”
“What? Why? Elise picks me up on Fridays.”
“She’s not going to pick you up anymore,” Gray said.
“Why not?”
“She’s just not.”
“Is that why she said she can’t text me anymore too?” Hunter pulled his phone out. “I texted her this morning about an idea I had for your birthday, and she said she couldn’t talk to me anymore.”
Gray’s fingers clenched around the steering wheel, trying to find a way to tell Hunter the truth. He hated this part of breaking up the most. He should’ve never involved his son in the relationship with Elise. He was never dating again, period.
The thought of being alone forever made his chest deflate, though he knew he hadn’t gotten a proper breath since ending everything with Elise last night.
“Dad, what happened?”
“I broke up with her,” he said.
“What? Why would you do that?”
“She asked you to get money.” Gray glanced at Hunter, trying to gauge how much his son remembered about the situation with Maddie.
“She did not.”
“I saw it on your phone.”
“I said I’d ask you for some money so she could take me shopping for your birthday. That was it. Elise didn’t ask me to get money for her.”
“That’s not what the text said.”
“Yes.” Hunter started swiping, and a sob came out of his mouth. “I said, ‘I could just ask him for some money, if you want. See what he says, and maybe he’ll give it to you.’ It was my idea to ask you. It was for a gift for you.” He swiped angrily at his eyes. “You can’t break up with her.”
“I already did.”
“Then undo it,” Hunter said.
“Hunter.” Gray sighed, because now he could only feel doubt and stupidity moving through him. “It’s not that easy.”
“Yes, it is. You call her and you just tell her you made a mistake.”
Gray just shook his head.
“Oh, that’s right,” Hunter said, his voice hard. “You don’t make mistakes.”
“Hey.”
“What, Dad? You don’t. At least you act like you don’t. You always know exactly what to do, and you’re never wrong. Well, guess what? You were wrong.” He folded his arms and looked out the window, still sniffling.
Gray didn’t know what to say. His son’s words stung him, and every time he opened his mouth, his emotions welled in his throat. The closer they got to the junior high, the calmer Hunter became. He wiped his eyes, opening the console to get out a napkin.
Gray pulled up to the school and stopped at the curb. “Hunter,” he said. “Is that really true? She didn’t ask for money?”
“Of course she didn’t.” Hunter threw Gray a death glare. “I think you’ve just been waiting for her to mess up, because you’re afraid.”
“I am afraid,” Gray admitted. But he wasn’t sure he’d been waiting for Elise to mess up. “Maybe
we’re okay, just the two of us.”
“No.” Hunter shook his head. “No, Dad. I love her, and I want her to be my mom. I want her to come live with us on the farm.” Tears spilled down his face again. “Fix it, Dad. Please.” He yanked on the console to open it again. “You bought her a diamond ring. I know you love her too, and you want her to come live with us on the farm too.”
Gray looked at his son, his beautiful, emotional son, and he knew he’d done something very, very wrong. He did love Elise, and he’d literally dreamed of having her on the farm with them. “How do I fix it?”
“Let’s go to her house right now,” Hunter said, pulling in a breath. “I can’t go to school like this anyway.” He wiped his face, and Gray looked out the windshield.
“Dad.”
“All right,” Gray said. “Let’s go to her house right now.”
Chapter Thirty
Elise felt like a satellite floating through space. She was the only one for miles, and she had been for hours. No one knew where she was, and she could take the next exit and quite literally disappear from the Earth.
It was strange how a couple of phone calls could change things so quickly.
First, Gray’s had thrown her completely off her axis. She’d called him back—three times—but he hadn’t answered. Desperate and heartbroken, she had her keys in her hand when the second phone call had come in.
It had been Wes, of all people. Bree’s having the baby, he’d said. She wants you to come if you can.
Elise had the keys in her hand, and she’d simply walked out of her house with nothing but a jacket and her purse. Oh, and her dog. Hutch had been by her side the whole time, and she’d never been more grateful for his presence as she made the trek from Colorado to Coral Canyon.
She’d been driving all night, and she’d only sent one text to Hunter in all that time. He’d said he’d thought of a great gift for his dad—a Keurig coffee maker—and she’d told him she couldn’t talk to him anymore.
She might not understand what Gray had done, but she could respect his wishes. He’d always been so protective of Hunter, and the moment he’d thought she’d taken advantage of him, everything they’d been building for the past nine and a half months had disintegrated.