by Robin Roseau
“Yes.”
“Good.” I turned, offering my back. “Would you help me?”
I think her fingers trembled, but she worked her way down the buttons. I looked over my shoulder and said, “From past experience, it is traditional to kiss anything freshly exposed.”
And so, she did, eventually kneeling behind me to place a final kiss in the small of my back. Then I stepped forward and let the dress slide downward before stepping out of it entirely. I moved to my closet, now in only my underthings, and hung it up, leaving it where the maids would find it and store it properly. When I turned, Shalendra was watching me. I couldn’t read her expression, so I closed half the distance before I loosened a few ties. “If I complete this process, will you be offended?”
“No.”
And so, working slowly, with her watching me the entire time, I removed everything I was wearing. Then I approached before walking all the way around her, trailing a finger. I took another half circle, ending behind her, then pressed against her back, wrapping around her, my front to her back. She pressed my arms to her. “Shalendra, I won’t be offended if you have changed your mind.”
“I haven’t.”
“Or if you ask me to find nightwear for both of us.”
“Perhaps… later?”
“Later,” I agreed. And then I began on her own buttons.
I undid her buttons and her stays, and then I helped her from the dress. It joined mine, and then her underthings as well. I brought us together again, this time kissing deeply. She wrapped arms around me, and then I took one hand and pushed it down until she was cupping my bottom. She stiffened a little, but then she began to massage, and I smiled into the kiss.
“Have you done this before?” I asked.
“No.”
“I won’t pressure you.”
“You’re not,” she whispered back. “But I don't know what to do.”
“Come.” I stepped away then took her hands and led her to the bed. She was clearly nervous, but she followed, and I set her into the bed, arranging her. “You’re nervous.”
“Can you ignore that?” she asked. “Darfelsa, I want to be here. If I didn’t, I could have left. I really want to stay.”
“Then I will show you, if you’re sure.”
“I’m sure.”
I showed her. This was the first time for me with someone inexperienced. I had been inexperienced with Gretchena, but I had learned – not everything, far from everything – but enough. I was slow, and gentle, and very, very thorough.
In the end, even though she was nervous, she began to shudder, and to whisper my name over and over until she lost her words. And I could feel the pleasures coursing through her.
Then, as she panted her recovery, I climbed her body before lying down beside her, pressed to her side, my hand cupping a breast. She added hers atop mine, but lay with her eyes closed, still catching her breath, her lips parted, her hair awry. I decided she was absolutely lovely like this, and I felt good for having brought this to her.
Finally, she opened her eyes and rolled her head to look at me. “I think perhaps you’ve done that before.”
“Not to you.”
“I don’t think I can move.”
I laughed. “You don’t have to move.”
“I have to…”
“Enjoy,” I said. “Just enjoy.”
“But what about…”
“Maybe later, or maybe we’ll just hold each other. Maybe next time.” I pressed my fingers to her lips, then caressed. “I promised a serious conversation, and we should probably have had it before we did this, but I don’t want to ruin the mood. So you’re going to close your eyes and let me touch you a little more.”
And so she did, and so I did, sweet, simple touches until finally she opened her eyes and turned to look at me again. “I’ve never been in love before.”
“And you’re not now, either. What you’re feeling right now is lust.”
She laughed. “Perhaps.” Then she put on a serious expression. “Can whatever you wanted to talk about wait?”
“It can. It probably shouldn’t.”
“All right.” She took my hand from her breast and pulled it higher, then held it there. “Tell me.”
“Gretchena is in Barrish.”
She stared at me for a minute. “Was this a…”
“A send off? No. Quite the opposite. She came for me.”
“It’s been a year.”
“More. I don’t expect to ever see her again. It was after I sent her away that I asked Mother to invite you tonight. I wanted to be with you, not her. I suppose if I’m being honest, the timing of what we just did might have otherwise been different, but I’d already decided I was looking for opportunity. She didn’t prompt this, she only prompted the timing.”
“Maybe I should thank her.”
“No. She represents my past. You’re part of my present. You’re not my entire present, and I don’t know if you’re my future. But you’re currently my only suitor that will be sharing my bed.”
“What about the woman from Dennaholst?”
“Well, she’s not here, and it’s been months. If she comes, then I don’t know what happens. That will probably depend more on you than on me.” I paused. “I think I was waiting for this, waiting to see if Flame was coming. I didn’t want to wait any longer.” I paused. “I suppose we should have talked about that before I seduced you.”
“No, because I don’t know how I would have felt about it, but now that you have…” She paused. “Right now, I want to be in your bed as often as you invite me.”
“Good. Close your eyes.” I went back to touching, to caressing, to kissing. And we talked, and cuddled. Eventually I pulled the covers up.
We didn’t bother with nightclothes.
* * * *
I woke, and Shalendra’s hands were moving over me. “How long have you been doing that?” I whispered.
“Not long. I didn’t want to grow any bolder while you were sleeping.”
I laughed, shifted a little, and said, “You may be as bold as you desire.”
She needed help, but I was patient, and she was determined, and she learned what I liked. Eventually, we both slept again.
Ressaline Plans
My birthday came and went. I was now 20.
The winter solstice came and went. And that night, in bed, I told Shalendra that I loved her. She cried, holding me tightly, and told me she’d never been happier. In the morning, she looked horrified.
“I scared you,” I finally said.
“I didn’t tell you. Darfelsa, I didn’t tell you.”
I laughed. “I think the tears were your own way.”
But she dropped to her knees in front of me, lowered her head into my lap, and said, “I love you, too. I’ve loved you for a while.”
And at that, there was nothing to be done but steal her clothes and send her back to bed.
I had yet to hear from Flame, but sometime over the winter, I decided she’d forgotten about me.
* * * *
We heard from Allium. Queen Lisdee was, to put a word on it, overjoyed with my proposal. I sat down with Father, Ahlianna, and my staff, and he put it simply. “This is your proposal, and you have the most experience with the Ressalines. What do you think we should do?”
“I should go to Charth, perhaps mid-spring. There’s time to invite Lyeneru and Rosaniya here first. We’ll stay in Charth, but then travel to Ressaline City. Allium will need to come with. If anyone is going to solve the transportation issues, she is.”
“Agreed,” said Father. “Ahlianna?”
“Father, I would like Darfelsa to have similar authority to mine.”
“Handle it,” he said.
“Father, how important is this to us?” I asked.
“If we were just talking about the immediate trade, not that important. But it goes beyond that. We’re setting a framework. And this is also additional experience for you.” He paused, but I di
dn’t think he was done. “And frankly,” he added, “We’re helping our friends.” That made me feel good. “There are selfish aspects to that. Queen Lisdee will remember this, twenty years from now.” He paused again. I could practically see him thinking. “When Ressaline invaded Charthan 15 years ago, I was deeply concerned. I think we all were. Darfelsa, you probably vaguely remember, and I’m not sure how much you do, Ahlianna.”
“I remember the troubles,” Ahlianna said. “But not any details.”
“I was worried this was a sign of things to come,” Father said. “But we know a lot more now than we did then.”
“Ressaline isn’t massing an army for invasion,” I declared.
“No,” he agreed. “They aren’t, and I don’t think we need to worry about it, either. Having a strong friend on our northern border is good for our own security. I don’t worry about anything from Ressaline, which is more than I could have said about Charthan.”
“I don’t understand,” I said.
“Cross-border banditry is a problem on all our other borders,” Ahlianna pointed out.
“Oh,” I said. “I knew that.”
“The only reason we need any military presence along the north border is to handle our own problems,” Father continued. “Helping Ressaline remain strong, especially when it’s good trade besides, is good for us.”
“And good for them,” I said.
“Yes,” he confirmed. “And good for them. And good for the people who will make more money from their goods.”
“I’m going to have more authority than Allium,” I pointed out.
“Yes. But you’ll want to work with her, and as much as makes sense, through her, not around her. She’s the one who is going to solve the problems involved, and you’re going to be there giving her anything she asks to make that happen.”
“I understand.”
“Good. I know you won’t promise anything you shouldn’t, and you already have a good relationship with the Ressalines. So, there is one last question. Who is going with you?”
“That’s why all of us are here, isn’t it?” Renishta asked.
“Yes, Ms. Pelonden,” Father said. “It is.”
“Where Princess Darfelsa goes, I go.”
“And do you know what that implies?”
“Yes, Your Majesty, I do. That’s why we’re going early, to spend time in Charth while it’s still winter in Ressaline City.”
“I’m going,” said Terla.
“And me,” Selzen, Talith, and Tess said together. “I’m not letting my sister have all the fun,” Tess added.
“Sergeant Felist?” Father asked.
“Where Darfelsa goes, I go,” she said, echoing Renishta’s words. “May I draw an honor guard?”
“Smaller,” I said.
“You’ll take a proper escort to our border, and you’ll coordinate with the Ressalines,” Ahlianna said. “Mariya, she doesn’t really need an escort north of the border.”
“I’m going.”
“I know you are. It would also be convenient if some members of the Royal Guard were free to travel into Ressaline.”
“I am fairly certain her entire past guard will want to go,” Mariya said.
“Don’t pressure anyone,” Father said. “If you’re the only one who goes, that is fine.”
“I spent years there without any particular guards,” I pointed out.
“I’m going,” Mariya said firmly. “Please back me on that, Your Majesty.”
“It sounds like she’s going,” Father said.
“Thank you, Mariya.” I paused. “I need advice.”
“You know what to do,” Father said.
“I’m not sure if I should invite Shalendra.”
“Ah. As far as I’m concerned, that is between the two of you. Ahlianna?”
“My opinion is you should make an offer but without pressure. Mother may have another opinion.”
I nodded. “Thank you.”
* * * *
I invited Shalendra to dinner. Later, we retired to the library with a bottle of cognac. I poured for both of us, handed a glass to Shalendra, then sat down, our knees touching. We sipped, and then I took her glass and set both of them aside. I took her hands and looked into her eyes.
“This looks serious.”
“I hope it’s a good kind of serious,” I said. I told her about the mission to Ressaline, what we were doing, and some of the details. In the end, I told her, “We’re going to be gone for months, probably the entire summer. I hope to return by fall, but that plan could change.”
“Oh,” she said.
“I want to know if you would like to travel with us.”
She brightened considerably and nodded frantically. “I thought you were telling me I wouldn’t see you for months.”
“You might quickly grow sick of me.”
“I find that unlikely.”
“I’ll be working.”
“And I’ll be supporting you,” she replied. “If I’m really invited, the answer is ‘yes’. I only need to know when we’re leaving, and perhaps help knowing what to bring. I’ve never been anywhere like that.”
“None of your clothing will be warm enough. Ahlianna and I will loan you some for the travels, and then we’ll buy more for you when we arrive. But I’ll help you.” I squeezed her hands. “But before you get too excited, I need to tell you about something else.”
“You’re going to see that woman.”
“What? No. Well, we might encounter her on the street, but I’ll make sure Allium and Olivia know I’d rather she not be invited to any events I’m attending. Why would you think that?”
“Your tone suggests it’s something I might not like.”
“Well, that part is true.” I told her the rest. She was shocked at first; who wouldn’t be? She was shocked, but she listened and asked fewer questions than I had.
But then she began smiling. I broke off. The smile turned into a grin. “I’m definitely going.”
“You do look good in red.”
“I’ll be so far ahead of any other competition that pops up,” she said, still grinning.
I laughed. “Do you need to think about it or talk to anyone else?”
“No, not about whether I’m going. But I do have questions. You said it won’t be with you.”
“No.”
“A citizen, and someone nurturing.”
“Right. And my staff will also be doing it. You won’t go to the same woman. A woman can have multiple slaves, but only one First Time at a time. It’s too intense, and she needs too much attention.”
“Has anyone else shared your bed since I began doing so?”
“Only if we’re talking literally, but if we’re talking about lovemaking, then no.”
“Who has been in your bed?”
I smiled sweetly. “My sister and mother.”
“They don’t count!”
“I am very careful with my words. You asked about my bed, not about lovemaking.”
“Kisses?”
“Cheek-kisses,” I said. “And you are not the only one I exchange Ressaline greetings with.” Then I told her about the games at my 19th birthday. “We hadn’t met, but how would you feel standing by for something like that?”
“Is that a common occurrence in your life?”
“No. I want to know how you feel about that.”
“How are you going to feel if it’s me?”
“I’m bringing you to Ressaline, where you will be another woman’s pleasure slave.”
“Okay, that’s a fair point.”
“The rules are different there, too.”
“Are you going to…”
“I suppose we should talk about it, but that is probably the expectation.”
She frowned. “What if I told you I wasn’t comfortable?”
“Then I won’t.”
“Really? Even while I’m off doing whatever I’ll be doing?”
“Yes, even then.”
“I want to think about it.”
“Fair enough. I still want you to come.”
She nodded. “I’m going.”
“Good.” I began to smile. “Good,” I repeated. I handed her the glass. “Bring that with you. I’ll show you something we can do with it.” Then I took her hand and led her to my bedroom.
* * * *
We made our plans. Traveling together, Rosaniya and Lyeneru arrived in Barrish. We gave them rooms in the palace. They joined the planning meetings, and I did some socializing, but for the most part, I left it to my staff to see to their social needs.
But there would be changes to the plans, and then more changes. It took a while for everything to sort out, and I had very little influence over events.
Clouds
When fresh clouds appeared on the figurative horizon, I didn’t notice them. It was only when the full lightning arrived that I recognized the storm for what it was.
My life over the winter was filled. Mother let me remove people from my list of suitors, but then promptly added fresh names. I told Shalendra about each one, to her obvious amusement. But then Mother added the first storm cloud, which I’ll come back to shortly.
I had Shalendra, who I saw as often as I could. I had my other suitors, who I was obligated to give time and attention in a variety of public ways. As I had most of my life, I attended every public function at the palace, but now with one or another suitor on my arm. That would actually represent another storm cloud, but it didn’t immediately show itself. Yes, I’ll come back to that as well.
And I had duties. We planned our trip as best we could, but Father and Ahlianna assigned other duties to me as well. I took over many of Ahlianna’s ceremonial duties. Individually, these never consumed much time, but there could be just so many of them. When a new business opened or expanded, well wishes from the royal family were welcome and taken as a good omen. When there was a birth or marriage, Father could send Mother, but many times, he could now send me. These were little things, but I found I enjoyed making this type of appearance. These were happy events, and if people were pleased simply because I wished good tidings, then I helped, at least a little.
Both Ahlianna and Father also asked me simply to “see to” several minor issues. Perhaps I shouldn't call them minor events, but my role was either minor or quickly handled. I’ll mention two.