by S. J. West
“About twenty minutes.” Kaylee looks away from me and back to Julian. “You have a lovely home. Helen showed me around a bit.”
“Thank you,” Julian says with a small smile. “You’re welcome to come here any time you wish to visit.”
“Why don’t we go inside?” I suggest. No pregnant woman should be out in the heat of a Louisiana summer if she doesn’t have to be.
“No, I need to get back to the house and help Ben. That was the main reason I was trying to get in touch with you. We’re having our annual summer block party tonight, and I wanted to invite you and Julian to come.”
I quickly recognize this is Kaylee’s none too subtle way of arranging a meeting between Julian and her parents. Before I can make up an excuse to get us out of having to go, Julian ends up answering for the both of us.
“We would love to come,” he tells her.
“Great!” Kaylee says excitedly. “Why don’t the two of you come over around six?”
“Should we bring something?” I ask.
“Just yourselves. Ben’s cooking enough to feed the whole neighborhood I think,” she giggles.
I instantly doubt he’ll even make enough to just feed me. I will definitely have to eat before we go there. All I need to do is make a pig out of myself in front of the people in Kaylee’s neighborhood. There are some busybodies there that I know for a fact will be watching every move Julian and I make with their super snoopy eyes.
Kaylee hands me her half-finished glass of tea and leans in toward me to whisper in my ear. “He’s gorgeous! I want hot juicy details about this trip to New Orleans later.”
She kisses me on the cheek and says her goodbyes to Julian before leaving. We watch her walk away and witness her struggles as she attempts to pull her pregnant self up into the Durango’s driver’s seat.
Being the gentleman that he is, Julian hurries down and helps her get settled behind the wheel. This chivalrous act definitely earns him some brownie points with my sister.
As Kaylee pulls away, she smiles at me and waves with a wink. Yep, she likes Julian. Although, that might not be saying much. Kaylee likes just about everyone she meets.
“She’s a sincerely nice person,” Julian says as he comes to stand in front of me. “I can see why she’s your best friend.”
“Everyone likes Kaylee,” I reply a bit wistfully.
“You’re a nice person, too, Sarah.”
I look at Julian. He doesn’t seem to understand why I envy Kaylee so much.
“I can never be like Kaylee,” I tell him. “I know how people really feel, and I have a hard time putting blinders on to who they truly are. I’ll never see people through the rose-colored glasses Kaylee was born with. It’s impossible for me to like everyone.”
“You have a slightly cynical view of the world,” he says, looking as though he’s worried about me for some reason.
“It’s my reality,” I reply. “Not all people are good and not all people are bad. I can’t pretend to like someone I have no respect for. I just wasn’t made that way.”
“How do you see me?”
Of course he had to ask me that question. I feel my face flush and have to wonder just how red it looks. Julian begins to smile, so I figure it’s as red as an apple.
“I can’t read you anymore, remember?” I pray that’s a good enough answer, and that he’ll drop the subject.
“But you must have your own opinion of me without relying on your empathic abilities,” he prods. “I want to know what you think of me.”
“If you tell me what you think of me,” I try to bargain, “I’ll tell you what I think of you.”
“Hmm,” he carefully mulls over my offer for a few seconds. “Maybe this discussion would be better left for another time.”
He starts to walk towards the front door, but I put a hand on his arm to stop him. He turns back around to look at me.
“Is it that bad?” I ask, not sure I actually want to hear his answer.
“No,” he says, studying something in the pools of my eyes. “I would just rather have this discussion later. It’s not the right time, Sarah.”
I let go of his arm. Julian hesitates as he continues to look at me before he finally turns around and walks into the house. He leaves the door open, expecting me to follow him inside, but I don’t go in right away.
Is there something wrong with me? Is that why he refused to tell me what he really thinks?
“Meow.”
I look down at my feet and see Viktor looking up at me expectantly. I pick him up and cradle him in my arms. He must have known I needed comforting because he leans his head back, and proceeds to wash my neck with his tongue as I walk into the house and head to the back where the kitchen is located. Julian is telling Helen we’ve been invited to the neighborhood block party.
“She invited me, too,” Helen says.
Thank God for Helen and her cooking skills. She’s standing by the stove, frying up some sausage in a frying pan, and I can smell biscuits already baking in the oven.
“You should come,” I tell her, standing beside Julian on the other side of the kitchen island from Helen.
“I think I would prefer a quiet night at home after all the drama at Mira’s,” she says with a tired sigh. “But you two go have fun. I’m sure this will provide you with the perfect opportunity to show everyone that you’re a couple.”
I, for one, am looking forward to the night ahead. I know Julian will be an attentive suitor, even if it’s just for the benefit of those we’ll be around.
While I eat the lunch Helen prepared for me, Julian excuses himself and goes up to his room. When he comes back down he’s dressed in only a pair of dark blue swimming trunks with a white beach towel draped around his neck.
“Have a nice swim,” I tell him, forcing myself not to openly gape at his body as he saunters half-naked through the kitchen.
He smiles. “Thanks.”
I try my best to pay attention to my food but soon find myself standing by the window, watching Julian dive into the blue water of the pool while I stuff my face with Polk’s sausage and buttermilk biscuits.
Helen comes to stand beside me and we watch Julian swim.
“I think you should tell Julian how you feel about him, Sarah,” she advises me.
“Helen,” I whisper in an admonishing tone, “he can hear you. Super-hearing, remember?”
“He can’t hear me when he’s underwater like that,” she replies. “The water distorts our voices.”
“Do you think I’m nuts?” I have to ask her. “I haven’t known him for that long. How can I be in love with someone I barely know?”
“The moment I saw my John I knew that I would love him for the rest of my life,” Helen tells me. “Sometimes, when the person and moment is right, time becomes irrelevant.”
“I can’t tell him,” I say shaking my head. “I’m not ready to do that yet. I need to know what he feels for me first. It would just be too embarrassing to bare my soul to him and then find out that he doesn’t feel the same way.”
Helen sighs. “I just want the two of you to find happiness. It’s been so long since he was happy. I think all he needs is a little push in the right direction.”
“I’m scared of rejection,” I confess as I watch Julian rise out of the water like some Greek god described by Homer. “I’ll do it eventually,” I promise her. “I just need a little more time.”
“Don’t wait too long,” she cautions, placing a comforting hand on my back. “Jump in and take a chance, my dear. I don’t think you’ll regret it.”
When Julian comes in from his swim, I’m watching Viktor lick the bowl of cold milk I gave him dry.
“I need to go to my apartment,” I inform Julian. “I haven’t been there in a while, and I want to make sure everything is all right. While I’m there, I’m going to go ahead and pack some clothes to bring over here.”
“All the new clothes Helen bought you are yours,” he tells me, looking as if
he’s wondering why I need to bring my own clothing over.
“I know, but Kaylee will get suspicious if I keep wearing new clothes. She might think I’m using you as a sugar daddy or something. I would just feel better wearing some of my own stuff, especially to the block party. It’s not a designer-dress-wearing kind of event. More a shorts and tank top type of thing.”
“Mind if I go with you to your place? I would like to see it.”
I quickly run the state of my apartment through my mind. Do I have any dirty clothes strewn across the floor? Is my bed made? Are the kitchen and bathroom clean? Since I couldn’t sleep well the two weeks prior to Julian finding me, I had used the extra time to clean my apartment until it practically shined. If there was ever a good time for Julian to see my place, it’s now.
“Sure. I would enjoy the company.”
“Let me change,” he says, continuing to walk through the kitchen. “I won’t be but a minute.”
I decide to follow him up to the second floor so I can take off all the black leather I’m wearing. I quickly exchange the heavy boots for my tennis shoes.
Viktor follows me back down to the front door and paws at my leg.
“Do you want to come, too, little fella?”
He leaps into my arms, effectively giving me his answer.
Julian walks down the stairs, dressed in a black polo shirt, jeans, and black loafers.
“Will this do to wear to the gathering?” he asks.
“Yes, that’ll do.” I know he’ll end up having every female at the party drooling into their sodas. “Just don’t smile too much while you’re there.”
Julian looks at me like I’ve said something extremely odd. “And the reason for that is?”
“You’re already going to have all the single and most of the married women there panting after you like dogs in heat. If you smile, you might give some of the older ladies actual heart attacks.”
He chuckles. “You worry about the oddest things.”
I shrug before opening the front door for us. “Just calling it like I see it.”
We take my car to my apartment. Viktor rides in the back seat, looking out the window as we drive through town. He acts like he’s a sightseer. After we park in the parking lot of my complex, he jumps out as soon as I open his door and walks straight up to the door of my apartment as if he already knew where he was going.
When I open the door to my apartment, I do a cursory survey of the interior to make sure I haven’t forgotten some mislaid piece of underwear on the couch or something equally embarrassing. Luckily, the inside is as clean as I remembered.
Julian walks in behind me and does a quick once-over of my place with his eyes.
“Seems small,” he comments worriedly.
“I don’t need much space since it’s just me,” I defend.
“Hmm…”
While I leave Julian in the living room, Viktor and I go to my bedroom to retrieve some of my clothing and other items I might need while I’m staying at the house on Bayou Road. I catch sight of Julian as he leans against the doorway to my bedroom, watching me pack.
“May I come in?” he asks.
“Sure.”
My bedroom doesn’t have a lot in it: a queen-size bed, chest of drawers, small desk where I keep my laptop and school supplies, and a series of black and white pictures of my family hanging along one wall.
Julian walks over to the pictures and begins to look at them. He comes to a standstill when he notices one of my mom and dad hanging directly above my desk. It’s one in which they’re laughing into the camera. It’s a picture I took of them on our last trip to Disney World together.
“Sarah,” Julian says, sounding somewhat dumbfounded by something he sees in the candid photo. “Is that your father?”
“Uh, yeah,” I say, wondering why a picture of my dad comes as any shock to him. “That’s my dad. Why? Does he look so different that you don’t recognize him?”
Julian reaches out and snatches the 11x14 picture from the wall, staring at it with a critical eye.
“It all makes sense now,” I hear him mumble, more to himself than for my benefit.
“What’s wrong? Why do you look so surprised?” I ask.
“I never knew who Clarissa married,” he reveals, a note of awe in his voice as he continues to stare at the picture. “Your grandfather and I just assumed it was some boy she fell in love with from school.” Julian turns around, still holding the framed photo, and looks at me. “Did they ever tell you much about your father’s family?”
“No,” I reply with a small shake of my head. “All they ever said was that they were all dead, just like my mom’s. Why?”
Julian frowns. “His family isn’t dead. In fact, you met his sister last night.”
Now it’s my turn to be confused. “His sister was at Mira’s party?”
“Shael, the alfar queen.”
I feel like a wall just hit me in the face. I have to sit down before I collapse from the shock of it all. Viktor saunters over and leaps up onto my lap. Absently I begin to pet him, feeling the deep purr of his pleasure at my touch reverberating deep within his chest.
I can’t stop staring at the light blue carpet in front of me. I feel dazed and confused by Julian’s revelation about my dad’s heritage. How could my parents not tell me I was part of another race? Couldn’t they have at least left me a note explaining things? Why had they left me so unprepared for a life they knew I would eventually have to deal with?
Julian places the picture of my parents back on the wall and kneels in front of me, forcing me to break the trance I’m in to look at him.
“You’re not just part alfar, Sarah. You are heir to the alfar throne. As far as I know, Shael is unable to have children. That makes you the sole heir as far as Moonshade bloodlines goes.”
“Moonshade?” I ask. “Is that my dad’s real last name?”
Julian nods. “There are five alfar houses. The one your father was a part of is called House Moonshade. I believe they chose that name to honor the magical power of a solar eclipse, which is also part of your house’s crest.”
“So what does that make me?” I ask, still trying to wrap my mind around the implications of being part alfar. “Am I some kind of princess to them?”
“Yes,” he answers simply.
“But I don’t want to be someone that important,” I state rather forcefully. “I just want to be me and stay with you until I die.”
Julian smiles at me wanly. “I’m afraid you’re far too important to the alfar, Sarah. They won’t simply let you slip into the background.” Julian looks down at Viktor. “And he knows that. It must be why he chose to leave the queen and be with you.”
“No,” I say adamantly, shaking my head. “They don’t have to know. Only you and I know the truth. We’ll just keep it that way. We can do what my mom and dad did. Just run off somewhere so no one can find us.”
“Meow!” Viktor’s very vocal protestation almost sounds like he’s accusing me of speaking heresy.
“I think the queen knew who you were last night,” Julian tells me. “She just didn’t say anything openly to you about it. I can’t say I blame her, considering who was at the party.” Julian sounds far too calm and reasonable about all of this. Why isn’t he freaking out about it like I am?
“What if they make me leave you?” I question, steadily becoming more upset. “I mean, can they do that? Will they do that?”
“No, of course they wouldn’t do that.” He’s saying the words I want to hear, but I can tell he’s not completely sure what the alfar might expect from me.
“If they try to give the throne to me, I can abdicate it, right?” I ask, trying my best to think of a scenario where I can at least hope to retain my life as my own.
“I’ve never heard of that being done,” he replies. “But Shael isn’t that old. She’ll remain queen for a long time to come. This isn’t something that you need to worry about right now, Sarah. It’s just some
thing you need to be aware of. I’m sure when the time is right, the queen will contact you and let you know what’s expected.”
My meeting with the queen all makes sense now. The love she felt for me had been real. The connection I felt with her hadn’t just been some sort of alfar thing. It was a family thing, blood speaking to blood.
“So I should just let her contact me first?” I ask Julian, feeling somewhat relieved that I don’t have to do anything yet.
“I think that’s the best course of action,” he says. “But she will contact you eventually. You’re the only living relative she has left.”
I don’t want to be heir to the alfar throne. For one, I don’t know what the hell that means. And two, anything that might separate me from Julian is completely unacceptable.
We sit there in mutual silence for a moment. All I can think about is what it means to be part of the alfar royal family, and Julian, well, I have no idea what he’s thinking about. He just stares at me like he wants to say something, but can’t quite make the words come out of his mouth.
“Is there something else you want to tell me?” I ask, hoping he might want to say something about his feelings for me.
“Maybe later,” is his reply.
I stop myself from sighing in disappointment. He probably isn’t thinking about love anyway. Not after finding out I am what I am. Wait a minute…
“Do you think that’s why it’s hard for you to be around me? Because I’m part alfar?”
The expression on Julian’s face doesn’t change. “I’m not sure.”
“Do you have a natural aversion to the alfar? Is that why my mother kept her relationship with my dad a secret from you?”
“No, I get along with them just fine, but some have powers similar to the witches and warlocks. You could have inherited your empathic ability from your father’s side of the family.”
What a non-answer. “But what does that have to do with the way I make you feel? Is there something else about me that bothers you? Something alfar-ish that I don’t know about?”
“Let me worry about that, Sarah. I told you I would figure out a way to handle it.”