Forfeiting Decency

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Forfeiting Decency Page 20

by Rachel Schneider


  I JERK AWAKE, HEART pounding from a fear I can’t place.

  Kip stirs next to me, eyes bleary as he opens them. “Are you okay?”

  I quickly take inventory of my body, deducing that I’m fine. “I think it was a bad dream.”

  He wraps an arm around me as I lie back down. “You don’t remember it?”

  Shaking my head, I say, “No. Not really. It’s more like a feeling.”

  “Night terror,” he says, concerned. “Have you had them before?”

  I shake my head. He tucks me into his side, brushing his fingers through my hair until I fall back to sleep.

  “DO YOU HAVE A…” I attempt to read Kip’s handwriting and guess, “Front set of semi-micro phallic brake pads?”

  The man on the phone laughs. “Do you mean semi-metallic?”

  I squint at the sloppy letters. “I think so.”

  “It has to be semi-metallic. Let me check.” I hear his fingers jumping across a keyboard as he checks their database. “We do have them in stock.”

  “Great. I’ll be there in fifteen to pick them up.”

  I hang up and peek my head over the railing at Kip working below. His head is tilted back as he gulps water from a bottle. Since Janine fired me for taking a self-appointed weekend off, I’ve been working as Kip’s secretary. At first, I refused. Kip in everyday life has control issues, so I expected Kip in work mode to be ten times worse, but he somehow finds a balance that works.

  “They have them in stock. I’m going to run and pick them up. I’ll be back in a few.”

  “Thank you. I think I left the keys in the ignition.”

  I give him a look. “Did stealing cars not teach you anything? It’s only four blocks, so I’m going to take the bike. It’d be the same amount of time considering I’d have to search for a parking spot anyway.”

  “Okay, babe. It’s rush hour, so be careful.”

  I roll my eyes. “It’s not any more dangerous than making me bike up a sheer cliff.”

  “At least you know what to avoid on the bike trail. You can’t avoid moving vehicles.”

  “Say that to my elbows.”

  “Love you,” he says, smiling at my insolence.

  I can’t help but smile back. “Love you, too.”

  Shrugging on a light jacket, I pull it over my hat as I mount my bike. The temperature has started dropping considerably at night, and the wind shear is no joke. I wave at Julie through the window of the shop next door and she waves back. Marty and Julia have been super amazing for business. Marty is a car fanatic and apparently has tons of car fanatic friends who he sends Kip’s way. It’s a bonus that Kip prefers to work on rebuilt muscle cars. He’s been super busy, working long days, but Kip doesn’t complain. He’s happy to be doing what he loves and actually breaking even.

  I’m pedaling across the next intersection when a guy on a motorcycle cuts from traffic, nearly killing me as he swerves into the bike lane. I have to ditch my bike, barely escaping death as I stumble over my feet. I cuss and give him the middle finger even though I know it’s useless. I flip my bike over and notice the front rim is bent from where I hit the curb. An SUV stops beside me and something about it makes me uneasy. I’m already taking steps away from it when the back door opens and a man makes eye contact with me as he gets out. I try to scream, but he covers my mouth, wrapping both arms around me as I kick, and shoves me into the back seat before anyone can hear me.

  I kick any and everything I can make contact with, bowing my body away from the hands trying to tame me. The hand covering my mouth muffles my attempts to scream. I bite down and taste blood, and it makes me want to vomit, but I don’t let up.

  “Fucking bitch,” the man yells, pulling his hand from my mouth.

  I spit, trying not to swallow the liquid. There are three men, but I can barely see past the rush of adrenaline screaming for me to get free.

  “Stop resisting. This is just a warning.”

  Yeah, okay.

  Two hands manage to get hold of my forearms, and I know it’s the first step to losing this fight. There’s no way I’ll be able to use my upper body as long as he has control of my arms, and by the look of his stature, I’m not going to be able to break free.

  “Landry,” the man says, halting my movements. “What do you want me to do with her?”

  My head is in the lap of the man I bit as his hands hold down my arms beside my head. Another man finally traps my legs beneath him by sitting on them, and I’m officially rendered useless.

  It’s then I notice Landry sitting opposite us, watching everything unfold with a devilish smile on his lips. “You’re not going anywhere, so you might as well conserve your energy.”

  “Why are you kidnapping me?”

  He adjusts his suit, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. “I never understood that term. You’re an adult. Shouldn’t it be called adultnapping?”

  I jerk my arms from the man holding them and he lets me go. “Are you trying to be cute? If you’re going to abduct me, at least pretend to be serious about it.”

  His smile grows. “You’re too cheeky for your own good. My presence alone should be enough to scare you. This guy?” he says, pointing a finger at the guy on the left of me. “He’s made men bigger, more powerful than you piss their pants.”

  “Sounds like you’re sexist.”

  “This Guy” smiles but doesn’t look away from the door. “Not many women get caught up in this business. Besides, I like to make women wet in an entirely different way.”

  I gag. “I bet it took you all night to come up with that one.”

  Landry redirects the conversation back to him. “Have you made any progress on the deal we made?”

  “God, can you stop calling it a deal? It implies that I have a say when I so obviously don’t.”

  “Fine,” he says. “Have you made any progress in securing the money that’s going to save your ass? Better?”

  Unfortunately, no. “I’ve looked into it.”

  He looks at me, dubious. “You’ve…looked into what?”

  I shrug. “It.”

  “That’s not very reassuring, Kaley.”

  “It’s not? I was so sure it would pacify you.”

  He smiles big. “If you hadn’t already screwed me out of business—literally—I might actually consider taking you on a real date.”

  “I didn’t know I wasn’t allowed to work at Hudson’s. If I had known you only allowed escorts who worked for your company to solicit men, I obviously wouldn’t have done it.”

  “But you did. If you wouldn’t have requested payment after we slept together, we wouldn’t be in this position.”

  “Maybe if you were a better lay I wouldn’t have charged you.”

  My insolence must have pushed him too far, because he motions to “That Guy” and before I know it, there’s nothing I can do to protect myself from the back of his hand hitting my face. The blow knocks me to the floor of the SUV, way harder than I had predicted it would be, and a low throb engulfs the side of my face.

  I blink to rid my eyesight of the blurring. “I thought you said this was going to be a warning.”

  Landry comes into view, leaning over to get a better look at me. “This is considered a warning,” he says, using a finger to push a few strands of my hair back. “I told you the night I approached you with this offer that things could go very bad for you if you didn’t cooperate. This is just a taste of it.”

  “You don’t want to do this,” I say, hoping I find a redeeming quality inside him.

  “This is strictly business. If I let you get away with working business out from under me, other girls will think they can do it too.”

  I sit up and ignore the way the world tilts on its side. “What more do you want from me?” I say, hating the pleading in my voice.

  Landry folds his hands in front of him, placing them against his stomach. “You can always come and work for me.” My silence is enough of an answer. “Kip won’t let you?�
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  “He doesn’t even know. I haven’t told him anything.”

  “You created this mess, Kaley.” He looks down at me, repentant. “At least now you know I’m an equal opportunity employer.”

  I let out a snort. “So noble of you.”

  Landry laughs. “I have to say, your attitude is a nice change from the normal gang bangers we deal with.”

  “Thanks for the compliment. I’ll be sure to leave a review with your HR department.”

  He smiles and I can’t think of anything I hate more. “I was skeptical when he told me, but I’d have to say your father was right, you are very feisty for such a pretty girl.”

  Oh, yeah. My father.

  “That Guy” kneels on the floorboard next to me, and something inside me wants him to hit me. I’m angry and disappointed in myself. I just want to feel something other than uselessness.

  “The only way you could make a girl wet was if you threw a million dollars into the nearest body of water.”

  He smirks as he pulls on a pair of leather gloves. “You’d be the first to jump in.”

  “You should do what you do best,” I say, smirking right back.

  “And what’s that,” he says, leaning over me. It’s intimate in a strange way, and I hate that the other men are witnessing it. If I’m going to face off my attacker, I at least want to do it with dignity. Landry’s presence is especially looming as he watches.

  “Stand on your tippy-toes and suck Landry’s dick.”

  It’s in this millisecond of a moment that I know I’m seriously convoluted and completely fucked up. As I watch him rear his hand back, I feel victorious and I keep my chin jutted out, defiant. I want this and it sickens me.

  PRESSING AGAINST THE SWOLLEN area of her lip, she doesn’t flinch from the pain. She does it again, but harder this time. The reflection looking back at Kaley in the mirror doesn’t show a hint of pain as she digs her finger into the skin. Blood trickles from the cut and the metallic liquid coats her tongue. She holds her hands under the faucet and splashes the water on her face, taking a moment to watch the blood rush to the drain.

  The door to the apartment opens and Kaley is amazed by the lack of response from her heart. When Landry finally dropped her off at the apartment, it was close to midnight and the apartment was empty. She felt guilty for not immediately calling Kip, knowing he was probably looking for her, but there’s a part of her that was hoping he’d be gone a little longer.

  “Justin’s on his way.”

  Out of the corner of her eye, she sees Kip and Lilly enter the living room and Kip spins in a circle, running his hands through his hair. “And he called Lance?”

  Lilly nods. “He left a message but hasn’t been able to get in touch with him.”

  Kip sighs, looking up from the ground, and he and Kaley make eye contact through the gap in the bathroom door. “Kaley?” He closes the distance to the bathroom in two short strides and pushes the door in with his hand. “Oh my god.” His eyes widen in horror, landing on the mess of her face. “Kaley, what happened? Oh my God.” His hands shake as he searches for a place to put them, settling on her upper arms. “Oh my God,” he repeats. “We need to get you to a hospital.”

  She pulls away from him, but he doesn’t acknowledge her desire for space. “What hurts the most?”

  Lilly squeezes her way into view and her gasp is loud against the bathroom walls. “I’ll call 9-1-1.”

  “No,” Kaley stops her, placing a hand over her movements. “No police.”

  Everyone takes a moment to let Kaley’s words sink in. Kip gives her an incredulous look. “What are you talking about? You need a hospital.”

  “I’m fine. Just…no police. They can’t help.”

  “Kaley,” he says, trying for calm. “You’re scaring me.”

  She takes a deep breath, trying to be understanding of his panic but not finding it within her. “I just want to take a shower and go to bed.”

  Wiping a hand across his mouth, he keeps it there, forcing himself to keep it shut.

  Lilly places a hand on his arm. “Kip, she’s in shock.”

  It takes him a moment, but he releases the tension in his jaw. “Okay,” he says, voice much calmer. “We can take a shower.”

  “By myself, Kip. I want to take a shower by myself.”

  His emotions flitter across his face too fast for Kaley to keep up, barely registering one before another masks it. “I’m not going anywhere. I don’t know if you have a concussion or some type of head injury. The last thing I’m doing is leaving you alone.”

  Kaley reins in her annoyance. “All I’m asking for is a few minutes.”

  He’s already shaking his head, torn by her irrational behavior.

  Since the pleading doesn’t work, Kaley changes tactics. “This isn’t a negotiation. I’m telling you to leave.”

  “Kaley, it’s not going to happen.” He looks her up and down, coming to some sort of a conclusion. “What are you hiding from me?”

  When she doesn’t reply, he reaches for the hem of her shirt and she slaps his hand away. “Don’t touch me.”

  His head snaps back in surprise, hurt mixed with disbelief, and it fuels his suspicions. Snatching the material between his hands at her collar, he stretches the hem at her throat, tearing the material apart.

  “Kip,” she yells, trying to stop him.

  But he’s on a mission and ignores her failing attempts to stop him as he rips the shirt in half. The image of Kaley’s body sends his back against the door, a whole new level of shock forcing him backwards. Bruises cover half of Kaley’s chest and abdomen, the marks ranging in size with no rhyme or reason to their position.

  She snaps, humiliation marring her cheeks. “Are you happy?”

  He swallows, unable to look away from her marred body. “Did they—did they touch…”

  She turns away from him, not wanting to hear the rest of his sentence to dispute the question. Shouldering out of the now ruined T-shirt, she turns on the showerhead and steps under the cold water. The bathroom door opens and closes, signaling Kip’s departure. She stands in the shower for so long, the water runs from hot to cold, and her body starts to protest. Sliding to the floor, she lets her head rest against the tiles, sighing in relief as she closes her eyes against the spray of water. Her muscles appreciate the break.

  Her body jerks awake before her eyes do, and it takes her a moment to blink against the light, figuring out where she is.

  “You’re fucking freezing,” Kip says, cradling her to his chest.

  She doesn’t fight it simply because she’s too tired to. Her body shakes uncontrollably in his arms, but she doesn’t actually feel the cold against her skin, numb. Kip lays her on the bed, wrapping the blanket around her, piling as much material on top of her as he can. He sweeps her soaking wet hair off her face, wiping a towel over the strands to dry them.

  “Look at me,” he says, leaning over her. When she doesn’t comply, his hands tighten on the pillow under her head. “Kaley, look at me right now or I’m taking you straight to the hospital and you won’t have a say in the matter.”

  She manages to meet his eyes, but her mind remains devoid of thought. His eyes implore hers, searching for answers she won’t give him.

  “Just tell me what I can do,” he says, voice trembling.

  Closing her eyes, she rolls away from his stare. “There’s nothing you can do.”

  She can feel his presence still looming over her, but she just wants to go back to sleep. She recalls the many times she wished to feel something, begged the heart in her chest to beat once out of rhythm, and now all she wants is for it to remain still. It could stop and it wouldn’t matter to her. It makes her feel smug, like she won, beating life at its own game.

  Kip wakes her every two hours, making sure she’s coherent before going to back to the couch for sleep. He keeps his distance, his tone removed of all emotion. Each time bothers her more than the last and she repeatedly fights the desire to bite
his head off every time he shakes her awake. She just wants to be left alone, and his detachment only adds to her growing anger.

  By the time morning comes, she’s exhausted. Rolling over, she swallows back nausea, an unsettling feeling taking root in her stomach. Her heart begins to beat rapidly, and she fights bile rising in the back of her throat. Rushing to the bathroom, she heaves over the toilet, but nothing comes up. She sticks her hand in her mouth, forcing herself to puke, and immediately breathes in relief when something of substance comes up.

  She’s brushing her teeth when she hears voices outside the apartment door.

  “…completely insane,” Kip says.

  Lilly replies. “You don’t know anything yet.”

  “She looks at me like I’m the enemy, like I’m the one who did that to her.”

  Justin’s voice joins. “She’s hiding something.”

  “Why though? What is it she doesn’t want me to know?”

  “It could be anything. They could have told her they’ll hurt someone she knows or hurt her worse than what they already have.”

  “You don’t understand,” Kip says, voice pained. “She shouldn’t be standing.”

  “It sounds like she’s in shock. We need to be patient, let her open up on her own. Kip,” Justin says, emphasizing his point. “Don’t push her.”

  “I haven’t, but I’m running out of—”

  Kaley turns off the running water of the sink and their conversation comes to a screeching halt. Kip appears seconds later with her favorite pair of pajamas in his hands. She takes them and dresses, ignoring the way he watches her every movement.

  “I’m going to go for a walk,” she says, finally meeting his eyes.

  His body sags. “Kaley, you can’t.”

  “I’m going,” she repeats.

  He clenches his teeth and the tops of his ears turn red. “You’re not going anywhere, unless you want to go to a hospital, and then I will drive you.”

  “You don’t own me,” she sneers.

  His face morphs, eyes becoming harsh with anger. “Are you trying to kill me? Do you have any idea how hard it is to see you like this?” When she doesn’t reply, he places his hands on her shoulders and makes her face the mirror. “Look at yourself,” he says. “This isn’t okay.”

 

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