by Nina Park
This time, he seemed spent; he collapsed next to her, rolling to the side just enough that she wasn’t trapped or crushed. She wiggled around until she was under the sheets; if he could afford multiple houses, he could afford someone to wash out the cum stains, and most of the mess had wiped off on the comforter anyway. She thought he might be squeamish or annoyed, but he got right under the covers with her, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her tight against his chest. She gave a happy little purr of a sound, and he laughed, kissing her under the ear.
“Do you like it here?” His voice was nervous, just a little shaky.
She bit back the first answer that came to her head – I like it here with you – and just nodded. She rolled in his arms, putting them face-to-face, then tucked herself under his chin. He seemed a little surprised, maybe taken aback, but after a moment his arms just wrapped around her, pulling her close.
She’d had all kinds of sex with all kinds of emotions, but this might have been the first time she let someone hold her while she slept.
Chapter Eighteen
The house became their unofficial base of operations. Tess made liberal use of the credit card that Milo had given her; she started redecorating the house, and she started rebuilding a wardrobe. She took her time with both; the bedroom came first. The furniture was fine, but all the linens and details just felt wrong. Once, she’d seen a magazine that did a whole bedroom in deep, chocolate brown and light turquoise. She’d loved it more than anything else that she’d ever seen, so she started there. She made herself buy one piece at a time; other, fancier, women could probably set up an entire house with one trip to Ikea, but she wanted to relish the process – and make sure she didn’t make too many mistakes because she was flying by the seat of her pants.
At the same time, she was choosing new clothes, a new wardrobe – it felt like she was choosing a new life. She found herself gravitating to two different sets of clothing. The kind of outfits that fit in at the clubs she and Milo went to every night, looking for leads on Toro, as well as the outfits she needed to dance at Assets twice a week, and the kind of outfits that fit in with the PTA and soccer mom lifestyle she’d be looking forward to in the future. She bought jeans and down vests, maternity clothes, sneakers and fleece lined boots. All the things she’d been torn between laughing at and yearning for when she’d seen them on the street.
She didn’t know quite who she was right now, but it felt like she was dancing between two worlds. Like she was a caterpillar in transition or something like that. It was hard to find the right words for a brand-new feeling.
At the same time, her body was starting to shift in odd little ways. The nausea got better and worse. The first set of jeans she bought were too tight, but the maternity jeans she bought slid off her hips. Her boobs hurt, all the time. Milo particularly enjoyed that, teasing and taunting them when they fucked. And they fucked a lot. Turned out that pregnancy turned her already high libido up until the dial broke off; they fucked on every surface in the house. Couches, walls, counters. The bathroom, the living room, even the guest bedrooms. Fast, heavy, grunting sex, slower and sweeter sex, kinky sex and vanilla, every way either of them could imagine, they had.
She liked having Milo around more and more, but when she started to say something like that, or mention how sweet it was to have him wrap her up in his arms when they went to sleep at night, he went cold and quiet. She didn’t understand why – except she did, she absolutely did. Leaving a life behind was hard. Walking between two worlds was hard. He didn’t know what he wanted, and she didn’t begrudge him that. She hadn’t asked him to make this choice, but he was making it all the same.
He took her to the bank, and she signed a bunch of papers. The bank officer told her that what she’d signed guaranteed a permanent trust for herself and her child, as well as a transfer of the home into her name. He said that everything was irrevocable; the money would be hers no matter what happened. She asked if the money would be enough to send the child to college eventually, and the officer laughed until he realized that she was entirely serious. He’d stilled his face and nodded gravely.
“Yes,” he’d said. “Yes, several times over. No question.”
It felt good. It felt good to know that she’d be safe. That the future she’d feared since the day she’d stepped onto the streets was not real. She was safe. Her child would be safe.
So, she decorated, and she shopped, and she danced at Assets. Milo didn’t come with her, most nights – said he’d take his lap dances in private. He worked other angles, looking for any sign of the drug lord whose life he needed to end to stay alive himself. Tess enjoyed it, especially now that she knew it wasn’t her forever. Making the patrons of the club roll out their tongues and hoot and holler was fun, entertaining. But it wouldn’t hold up for long. She was sure that no one else was noticing the changes in her body, but she could feel the difference. She got tired more easily, her balance was different, and her abs weren’t as strong as they’d been before. She guessed that she could pull this off for a few weeks more, maybe a month. After that, she and Milo would need to work out a different plan.
One night, as she was stepping off the catwalk into the backstage area, Tess saw a familiar face. It took a moment for her to link the face with a name: Alexei. He’d been a high-level goon for Toro, and he was grinning at her now. Tess had spent more than a few nights with him, doing all kinds of kinky shit he’d loved. He was big into costumes; she’d been a naughty nurse and a naughty professor and a student who needed a very good spanking. He’d always thanked her afterward, kissed her, and stuffed a grand between her tits, so it was hard to be annoyed at the costumes, even when they chafed a bit.
He opened his arms to hug her, and Tess laughed, stepping into his arms in her platform heels. He grabbed a handful of ass as he said, “Tess, my love, I thought I’d never see you again!” She peeled herself off, slapping his shoulder in a playful fashion, and grinning right back.
“It’s been a rough few months, Alexei, I’m not going to lie.” She leaned into him, giving him a big smile. “How’ve you been?”
Alexei laughed. “If you really want to know, Tess, we should go somewhere more private. I have some information about our mutual friend which may be information you want.”
Tess’ heart started to beat a little too quickly. Was this going to be the night she and Milo finally got a lead? “Want to come back to my dressing room and catch up?”
He grinned big. “You know me so well. Lead the way.”
She hooked her arm through his and led him through the narrow, dingy halls to the former broom closet that had been transformed into a dressing room for whichever girl was headlining tonight. There was an old stuffed armchair tucked into one corner, and she led Alexei to it, pushing him down into the seat and then dropping sideways into his lap, her legs swung over the arm of the chair. It gave him very little access to her while making him feel like could get to anything he wanted.
“Will you tell me what you’ve heard?”
Alexei laughed, and his grin turned darker. “You’ll pay me first, pretty Tess. It’s been a long time since anyone’s been willing to be rough with me.”
She slapped his shoulder again, and let her expression shift dark and angry. “Toro left me high and dry, Alexei. I’m lucky that one of his competitors didn’t grab me up to use against him or – or worse. I want to know where he is because I need revenge. I want you to give it to me because I need it.”
Alexei’s expression changed as he realized that he might not be getting any part of what he wanted here, and Tess felt a swell of fear as she realized the gentleman absolutely had the capacity to murder her right here in this room. She’d been with Milo too long – forgotten that sometimes the darkness was real and not a game designed to entertain both of them. She was frantically trying to figure out how to get out of the nightmare she’d just manufactured for herself when the door to the tiny room burst inward as if the knob had been kicked off
the door. Milo’s big form filled the door, and then his hand was closing around her wrist, pulling her up and off Alexei’s lap and pressing her behind him. Without saying a word, he reached out and took Alexei by the front of the shirt, lifting the man up and onto his tiptoes. Milo kicked one foot back and slammed the door.
“Everyone here knows she’s my girl, and no one is going to think a goddamn thing of the sound of a man getting beaten in this room. You were going to tell her something, and now you’re going to tell me, and then you’re going to walk out of this room like nothing happened.” Milo’s voice was dark and cold; Tess hadn’t heard him speak this way since the very night he’d broken into the penthouse. She felt something inside of her start to shiver with fear, and she curled up around herself, trying to find a way to breathe. This was the father of her baby; this was part of him, too. And it was terrifying.
Alexei started to speak, and Milo didn’t even let him get the word out. He backhanded the man, then slammed him back against the door again. “Oh, I’m sorry,” Milo said, his voice just as cold. “I forgot. You go ahead and talk.”
Alexei was a stuttering mess; Tess had never seen the man shaken before. “Toro,” he managed to spit out. “He left town. He’s heading south, I guess, to some little shithole town on his way to Mexico. I don’t know where. I don’t know anything else. Just, I wanted the girl to know. To know I’d take care of her if she needed someone to do that.” She saw Milo’s face darken further; Alexei must have seen it too. “I swear, I get it. She’s taken care of. I won’t say another word, I won’t bother her, I won’t bother you. Just, please, let me go?”
On the one hand, it was sad seeing the man so craven and shattered. She was a little surprised he hadn’t pissed himself. But on the other, seeing Milo get so angry, so defensive on her behalf – that gave her all kinds of good feelings. She’d found herself wondering over the last few weeks if he’d really just walk away from her and the baby. He seemed dark and dangerous, and he clearly was, but there was more to him than that. She was absolutely convinced of it. To see that danger turned towards her, protective of her, it made her wet in fascinating ways. This whole pregnancy thing was doing a ridiculous number on her libido anyway, but this was just something extra special.
Milo dropped Alexei, and the shaken man fell to his knees, coughing.
Milo looked at Tess, his eyes still dark. “Get your things, you’re done here.”
There was part of her that wanted to argue; no man was going to boss her around or tell her what was happening to her, pregnant or not. But she liked being under his wing, she found, more and more. She wanted to be protected by this burly man who saw who she was, saw just how tough she was, and wanted to take care of her anyway. Maybe wanted to take care of her more because of it. It wasn’t all the baby; she was sure of that, somehow.
She didn’t need to pick up much. She’d already known that her dancing days were pretty much over; let the next girl use her makeup and costumes – if they fit. She grabbed her bag that had a change of clothes and her personal items and tossed it over her shoulder. She’d expected Milo to take her by the elbow – he just seemed to be in that kind of mood – but he grabbed her hand instead. It was an intimacy she hadn’t expected, but it felt incredible.
“Okay,” she said, and let him take her out of the room, out of the life she’d once loved and now no longer fit who she was, out of the space she no longer wanted to be in.
There was a door out the back of the club which led into the nearby alley. He led her through the dark halls, through that door, and outside. She wanted to pretend like it was a breath of fresh air, but it smelled like garbage and puke, nothing good at all. He made a face and kept holding her hand as he led her farther into the darkness. The smells decreased as they got away from the main roads and into the network of backways that wove through the city. Milo’s speed walking gradually slowed, and Tess finally started to catch her breath. Her libido had kicked into high gear, but she was still tired easily these days. Hormones or something, she’d been told at the one prenatal visit she’d had.
“I’m sorry,” Milo said, but the way his mouth formed around the words, she suspected they weren’t entirely familiar to him. “I didn’t mean to go all caveman like that.”
It was the oddest thing – having him apologizing for something that made her want to drop to her knees and beg for the chance to pull out his cock and suck him off right there.
“It’s okay,” she said. “That guy – he was better than some, but that’s not saying he didn’t earn it.”
Milo nodded without really looking at her. “I shouldn’t have said you were done. That’s—I’m not in your life like that. I can’t make those calls for you.”
She nodded. He was right. “Do you want to be?”
His eyes flicked to her, and then away again. “What do you mean?”
She gave a little shrug, feeling like she was sharing something far too big and important to brush away with that sort of gesture, but not knowing how else to communicate what was in her head. “It’s nice. The house, the clothes, all of it. I like knowing I don’t have to go back to the club. It’s not my place anymore. I’m too old for it, and as much fun as I had dancing, it’s not an industry where a girl gets to grow old gracefully. I want something different than that.”
He nodded, finally shifting his gaze back to her. “I know,” he said. “That’s why — part of why — I’m getting you set up. So, you don’t have to do that.”
“But you could do that with me. If you wanted. You could be in my life like that. In the baby’s life like that.”
Milo went absolutely, completely still. Tess didn’t dare breathe; he looked like he was made of glass, and a stiff wind would knock him over. He didn’t blink, didn’t shift, didn’t so much as whisper. And then, suddenly, he was nothing but motion. Tess scrambled back under the onslaught of his mouth and his hands. He tore at her clothes, thrust his tongue into her mouth, twisted her nipples in his fingers until she screamed, and then he stole that away too. He tore off her bottoms, just shredded them right off her, and yanked out his cock. He pulled her up, pinning her against the wall with his chest, his hands bracing her ass and her thighs. He didn’t finger her to see if she was wet enough to take him, didn’t tease her open; he slammed into her so hard she ached and screamed again, a noise of sheer pain and total delight at how much it hurt. He hadn’t been so rough since that first time in the hotel, when she’d had no choice, and he hadn’t listened to her no. She didn’t want to say no, this time, not really; if she’d thought to arrange it beforehand, though, she was sure she’d be screaming it, so he’d know to go that much harder.
By the second stroke, she was wetter, and by the third, he was moving in her smoothly. He bounced her on his cock more than he rode into her, but she didn’t care; it was incredible, and she was so hungry, so hot for him, so desperate. Her fingernails dug into his shirt, and he made a stark hissing sound as if her nails had dug in. She was aching already, closer than she could imagine.
He could feel her, throbbing, aching around him. He snarled, loud and clear, tearing his mouth from hers for a moment. “You want it, don’t you, you little slut?”
“Fuck, yes.”
“Dressed like this, begging for it. Weren’t you?”
She groaned, fighting to keep herself from slipping straight over the edge into what she was quite sure would be one of the more incredible orgasms she’d ever had in her life. “I was. Fuck. Yes.”
“Can’t fool me. Can’t pretend you didn’t.”
“I did. I wanted this. I wanted you.”
He groaned hard, and she could feel him fighting back as well, all of a sudden. “Then come for me, you filthy little slut.”
She came like he’d pushed a button deep inside her, screaming his name and a long string of curses as he pulsed inside of her. He was quieter than her, but only just. She felt him spasming, spurting so hard that he was already running down her thighs before he’d
even slowed down.
“Fuck,” he murmured into her ear. “Fuck, Tess.”
She smoothed his hair, stroking him softly and whispering in his ear. She didn’t know why his response to something soft had been incredibly vicious and harsh. She loved it, and maybe she didn’t know why, but at the same time, she understood it perfectly.
“I’m here,” she murmured. “I’m right here. Thank you. God, that was perfect. Thank you.”
He clung to her in a way she hadn’t really expected. Soft and sweet and real in her arms. She held him back, gentle and tight.
“Yes,” he said. She didn’t have to ask what he was responding to. “Have to finish this. And then. Yes.”
“Okay,” she said. “Then let’s finish this.”