by Meg Benjamin
She turned back to the kitchen as the door to the cheese room opened and Ruth stepped through. Warmth pooled in his gut. God, she was lovely.
She glanced up and caught sight of him. And stared blankly.
Liam frowned slightly. Not exactly the reaction I was hoping for. “Morning,” he said.
She seemed to re-collect herself, giving him a fairly warm smile. “Morning yourself. What brings you here? I thought you worked the late shift last night.”
“I did. I slept over at the brewery. Just thought I’d drop by and see if you’d take pity on a man who needed coffee.” He hoped that was suitably light. He was getting a funny vibe from her right now, one he didn’t know how to deal with.
“Sure, any time. Did you try Peaches’s rolls? They’ve got raisins.”
He nodded. “Working on it now.” The silence stretched between them. “I’ve got some news. About the tavern.”
“Oh?” She picked up her own cup of coffee, warming her palms against it. “What’s up?”
“Stanton’s closing it down,” he blurted.
Her eyes widened. “Really? When?”
“Saturday’s the last day. It’s when his lease runs out. Apparently he’s been planning on closing down so that he can concentrate on his new place.” He tried another bite. It was pretty good, but he had a feeling anything he tasted would be like sawdust right now.
Ruth looked genuinely concerned. “That’s awful. What happens to the people who work there? Is he going to hire them for the new place?”
“He’ll hire them if they can afford to wait until the new place is finished in six weeks or so. Except most of them can’t do that.”
“Oh, Liam, that sucks.” She put her hand on his arm. Maybe the whole funny vibe thing was just in his head.
“It’s okay. I can work the brewery for now. I just wish I’d known what was up. I wish all of us had known that. Maybe I wouldn’t feel so pissed.”
“Sit.” Ruth gestured toward one of the café tables. “Have some more coffee.”
Definitely in your head. She seemed fine right now, anyway. “How was your dinner with your ex?”
And just like that, she closed up again, her shoulders stiff, her eyes downcast. Hell. Whatever it was, it was going to be bad.
“We ended up fighting,” she said slowly. “And then I fought with Carol, too. Everything feels like it’s just…closing in. Everybody’s mad.”
Liam reached across the table, placing his hand on hers. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I don’t know much about parenting, but I know it’s tough.”
She looked up at him, chewing on her lip. “She wants to go to California with him, and I don’t want her to. I don’t trust him. He’s likely to forget she’s there and take off for Tahiti or something.”
Liam narrowed his eyes. He wanted to reassure her, but he also wanted to punch her ex-husband in the mouth. “You mean he wants her to live with him?”
Ruth stared up at him with wide eyes. “No. Nothing like that. Just a visit. I mean, I don’t think so…” Her voice trailed off.
He wanted to kick himself. Instead of comforting her, he’d given her something new to worry about. “Has he ever had her stay before?”
She shook her head. “He doesn’t really know anything about her. He keeps wanting her to go shopping. I think he thinks she doesn’t look right. He wants her to dress up.”
“That’s crazy.” Liam leaned forward. “Look, Ruth, Carol is a great kid. Everybody knows that. She’s got her head screwed on right. Maybe this asshole doesn’t appreciate her, but everybody else in town sure as hell does.”
Ruth shook her head. “I just don’t want him to hurt her. I don’t want her to feel like he’s ignoring her because she isn’t good enough.”
“I don’t think she’d believe that.” He frowned. “She’s a very smart kid, Ruth. And she seems to be a good judge of people. Why not let her go? She’ll see what he’s like and maybe come back here knowing he’s an asshole.”
Ruth stared down at her hands, her jaw suddenly tight. “It’s not that simple. I’m afraid of what might happen to her. I don’t think he knows how to take care of her. I don’t know if he’d even try.”
“He’s her father.” Liam shook his head. “I mean, I don’t know him, but what do you think he might do? Abandon her somewhere?”
She looked up at him and suddenly he wished mightily that he’d kept his mouth shut. She looked more angry than frightened. Angry at him, of course. “He’s got no experience taking care of a child. He’s going to turn her over to his PA to take care of, and who the hell knows if his PA is responsible. David’s more likely to have hired her for her boobs than her childcare abilities.”
“What’s a PA?” He assumed she wasn’t talking about a physician’s assistant.
“His personal assistant.” She grimaced, as if she’d tasted something sour. “He’s always got a personal assistant, and she’s always young and cute. That’s what he hires them for.”
Uh-oh. All of a sudden he remembered her ex had cheated on her. Now he had an idea of just who he’d cheated with. “You could ask him what she’s like.”
Ruth’s mouth firmed. “He’d just say she’s fine. He’s not going to admit he’s sleeping with her.”
Liam shook his head, trying to clear it. The line of argument was getting a little murky. “Is that the issue? You think he’s going to turn Carol over to his mistress?”
Ruth pushed herself to her feet, her face grim. “The issue is that I don’t want my daughter to go to California with my asshole ex-husband. That I don’t think he’s capable of taking care of her. That’s the issue, Liam.”
“I’m sorry,” he said automatically. He wasn’t sure what he’d done, but he knew he’d done something. “Have dinner with me tonight. We can talk more.”
She seemed to be taking a deep breath. “No, I can’t. I don’t know what’s happening with David. I may need to talk to him again. And I’m just not up to it right now. I’m sorry. I just… I need some time to get my head straight again.”
She’s sending me away. The thought sent a shiver through his soul. Not this. Not this on top of every other goddamned thing.
He gave it one more try. “You need to relax. Just have a drink with me after work.”
She shook her head. “I can’t. Not right now. I need to figure out what to do.”
He had no idea what to say. He couldn’t tell her not to worry about it—he’d already tried that and it hadn’t worked. Besides, who was he to put down her fears about her daughter? Carol was the most important thing in her life. He’d never believed anything else.
He pushed himself to his feet. Whatever else he did, he couldn’t go on sitting in the warm coziness of the Salty Goat any more. Not when he might be losing a woman he thought he loved.
Correction: he knew he loved.
You were going to lose her anyway. You’re going to Park City, remember? Right then, that was the last thing he wanted to remember.
“Ruth…” he began.
“I can’t talk anymore,” she said quickly. “I’ve got stuff to do. So do you. You’ve got a big move to plan. And now you’ve got the time to do it.”
He took a breath, trying to come up with something to say, something that would make everything all right again. And coming up dry. It was that kind of day. “I’ll give you some space for now. Sooner or later, you’ll work this out. I believe that. Just remember—you can call me anytime you want. I’ll be there.”
Ruth stared at him, her eyes suddenly swimming with tears. “You’ll be there. For now.” Then she picked up her coffee and headed toward the kitchen.
He turned and walked out the door, taking care to close it behind him rather than slamming it as he wanted to.
This had, in fact, been two days in hell. He’d lost his job, his livelihood, and now it looked as if he was going to lose the woman he loved. He wished he could say that he’d been through the worst of it.
But by now he
was afraid to even say that.
Chapter Twenty
Ruth got through the day by keeping her mind carefully empty. She hadn’t done anything wrong. She and Liam had had a disagreement. Worse than that—she and Liam had had a fight, a serious one. But it wasn’t her fault. He didn’t understand the problem, didn’t understand why David was a threat.
She couldn’t have a relationship with somebody who couldn’t see the danger she was facing. And she couldn’t have a relationship with somebody who already had one foot out the door. It was that simple.
But it wasn’t simple at all. Her whole body ached with misery. But she couldn’t think about that. She couldn’t think about anything Liam had said. If she did, she might back down, and who knew what would happen after that?
You have to stay strong, for Carol’s sake. You can’t let your guard down.
She fixed Carol’s supper on autopilot, only half listening to her talk about the customers at the deli that day. The only time she’d been focused on anything except not thinking about Liam had been when Carol wanted to use the slicer. Ruth had focused all her concentration on the way her daughter put on her chain-mail gloves and sliced mortadella with elaborate care. At least it had given her something to concentrate on other than her own idiocy.
Because she was an idiot. When she’d stopped coming up with excuses, she’d had to admit it. She’d gone after Liam for no reason except that he’d tried to be reasonable and she wasn’t ready for that. But maybe that was the point. Maybe she wasn’t ready to let him help. And then she’d driven him off. She’d thrown away the last couple of weeks they could have together.
Her brain kept supplying images of the things she’d done with Liam. Things she’d definitely miss if she’d ended their relationship.
Stop it. You’re making yourself crazy. Crazier. There was no relationship. It was just a fling. Concentrate on Carol.
Of course, concentrating on Carol meant facing the fact that her daughter was still furious. And she hadn’t come up with a better way to explain why she didn’t want her to go to California. Liam’s argument—she’ll see what he’s like and maybe come back here knowing he’s an asshole—kept echoing in her mind.
No. I can’t let her go. It’s too dangerous. I can’t even think about it.
She ran a hand over her face, trying to stave off the exhaustion weighing down her shoulders. She’d sent Liam away for good reason. He wasn’t helping her fight, and she needed to concentrate on her daughter. She couldn’t give David a toehold anywhere. He’d run right over her.
“Mom?”
Carol’s voice penetrated the fog in her mind, and she looked up from the table. “What?”
Carol was staring at her with narrowed eyes, as if she wasn’t sure her mother was functioning the way she was supposed to. Which was no more than the truth. “Can I watch Dad’s show on TV tonight?”
“Which one?”
“The comedy. The one about the family in the sixties.”
Ruth nodded. “That one’s okay.”
“Good. I’m all done with dinner. Can I be excused?”
“Sure.” She glanced down at her own plate. Most of it was untouched. She had no appetite, yet another thing to thank David for. Or maybe she should thank her own stubbornness.
She thought about joining Carol in the living room, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. No way was she going to watch a show produced by a rat bastard.
The doorbell rang as she was loading the dishwasher. Her heart jumped. Liam. Except, it wouldn’t be him. Not after the fight they’d had.
She wasn’t entirely surprised to see David on the front porch. Nor was she surprised to see that he was carrying a box with “Xbox” printed on the side.
Of course, you bought it, you son of a bitch.
He gave her one of his superior smirks. “Where’s Carol?”
“Watching your show. If you want to attach that thing to the TV, you’ll have to turn it off.” She turned away, heading back into the house.
After a moment, David followed.
“If it bugs you that I’m giving her a present, think of it as an early birthday gift.” He didn’t always remember to send Carol a birthday gift, so maybe this was meant to make up for his erratic attention span.
Ruth turned in at the living room entrance. “Carol, your father’s here.”
Carol looked up warily, glancing at the television as if she were a little embarrassed to be caught watching David’s show. Then she saw the Xbox and jumped to her feet. “Wow! Cool!”
He handed her the box. “I figured I owed you a couple of games of Minecraft. I bought you a new copy to go along with this.”
Very smooth, David.
Carol gave him a shy smile. “Thank you. Can we set it up now? Did you bring any other games?”
David gave Ruth a slightly smug look, then turned back to Carol. “Yeah, I brought a couple. We should be able to get it set up and going here as soon as we get your old one disconnected.”
“Right.” Carol switched off the television set, then flopped down next to her game system and began unplugging.
Ruth gave him a flat look. “Can I look at the games, please?”
“Don’t worry. They’re all E rated.” He smirked again as he handed her the games.
She handed them back after a careful inspection. “Fine. I’ll be in the kitchen if anyone needs anything.”
Carol gave her a worried look, but Ruth ignored it. She didn’t have it in her to make Carol feel good about her father’s behavior.
She left them alone until around ten when she went to the living room to remind Carol of her bedtime. Carol was flushed and smiling, sitting in front of the television set with her controller in her hand, until she saw her mother’s face. And then, abruptly, her smile disappeared and she looked wary again. A more obvious case of divided loyalties Ruth had seldom seen.
And once again, fuck you, David. She didn’t want her daughter to be confused. She wanted her to enjoy her life. But she couldn’t make things seem better than they were.
“I want to take the munchkin out to dinner tomorrow night,” David said. “I’ll pick her up around six.”
Ruth fought down her automatic resentment. Couldn’t he at least have asked her first? Why was it always a challenge? “Have her home by eight.”
Carol looked back and forth between them, probably trying to figure out what was happening, and more importantly, whose side she was supposed to be on.
David gave her an easy smile, then turned back toward the living room. “Good night, kid. Thanks for the Minecraft tournament.”
Carol nodded carefully. “Sure. Thanks for the new system. It’s awesome.”
“Glad you like it. See you tomorrow.” He turned without looking at Ruth and headed down the hall toward the front door.
Ruth waited until the door closed, then turned back to Carol again. “Okay, go brush your teeth. I’ll be up to say good night in a few minutes.”
Carol started toward the stairs, then paused. “Was it okay that I played videogames with him? Should I have told him I didn’t want the Xbox?”
Damn you to hell, David Mobley. “It’s okay. It wasn’t your call. I’m glad you enjoyed it. Go get ready for bed now.”
She sank onto the living room couch as her daughter went upstairs. At this point life sucked on so many levels she’d almost lost count. At least the deli is a success. She almost didn’t want to think about that, as if thinking about Peaches might bring down another catastrophe.
You can’t go on like this.
No, she really couldn’t. She needed to take a stand. David had her on the defensive, and she didn’t like it. But she wasn’t going to do anything to make the situation worse. And if that meant letting her ex-husband take their daughter to dinner, she’d go with it.
…
Liam figured there was nothing to be gained by delay. He needed to start planning for Park City, and to do that, he needed more information. The manageme
nt company that owned the Park City hotel had an office in their hotel in Antero. He could go over and talk to somebody who might be able to answer his questions.
Besides, getting information would help him keep his mind off Ruth and what was going on between them. Or not going on between them. He needed to clear his head, just like she needed to clear hers. But he wasn’t ready to give up. That much he knew. He wouldn’t let her throw away what they had.
Assuming he had a choice. What do you have, Dempsey? What can you offer her from five hundred miles away?
He gave a little thought to checking out the job situation in Antero, hanging out at a few friendly bars around town and listening to gossip. He might have been able to get some leads about who’d just gotten a great offer from that new place in Barrington, and who was likely to be down a bartender now that the summer was winding down.
But any Antero job would have to go some distance to equal the one in Park City. He’d be running the place part time along with bartending, getting ready to make the leap from service to management. Another bartending job wouldn’t be enough, not if he wanted to stop spinning his wheels as a part-time brewery assistant.
He did a little asking around anyway, just to see if serendipity could work for him. The result was about what he could have predicted—nobody was hiring, and nobody was quitting. At least, not right now. After a while, he headed for the management company to take his medicine. Park City was it.
The office was at one of the resort hotels, small but upscale. Liam studied the dark wood interior and the slate-topped bar of the cocktail lounge as he walked in. Not all that congenial. But the tips were probably better than he got at Black Mountain. Hell, anything would be better than the tips he was getting right now, given the way they’d gone downhill.
He headed down a hall near the lobby toward Rick Magruder’s office. Magruder was in charge of hiring for the local place. Liam had met him a few times during the application process. If anyone could tell him about the move to Park City, he figured Magruder could. He took a breath and knocked on the doorframe. “Mr. Magruder?”
Magruder glanced up from his computer. “Yeah?”