“Get the fuck the out!”
“Baby...”
“Get the fuck out!! NOW!”
I don’t know if she realized how bad she had just fucked up or if she was listening to my anger, but she walked away without another word or any further argument. As I held my throbbing and swelling eye, I watched her solemnly walk out of the living room and towards the front door. The closer she got to the door, the more weight left my shoulders.
As I heard the door open and close, it was amazing how, even with indescribable pain in my face, I felt the freest I had felt in years.
Simone
“What is this bruise on her leg?”
Blood rushed from my head as I strapped myself into the passenger seat of Omari’s car. While strapping Dahlia into her car seat in the back, Omari continued to question me. “Did you see this?”
I had. I noticed the bruise on Dahlia’s leg that morning as I watched Omari bathe her in her tub. I logged a mental note not to smack her anymore.
“No, babe. I hadn’t noticed. What kind of bruise?”
“I don’t know. I can’t tell. Her little leg is just red and purple.” Suddenly, he was cooing all in Dahlia’s face. It was so hard for me to hide my repulsion. However, I hurried up and fixed my face after hearing him close the back door. Soon, he was climbing into the driver’s seat.
“I’m gone have to ask Tiana about that shit.”
I played dumb. “About what?”
“That bruise on my baby’s leg!” His face was balled up with irritation as he backed out of the driveway. “She needs to watch her more carefully. I don’t play that shit when it comes to my baby.”
I slid my hand on his thigh. “Baby, calm down. A toy probably hit her or something in her crib.”
Omari agreed as jealousy boiled in my stomach.
I couldn’t remember Omari ever being that upset about anything regarding me.
We were on our way to his sister’s house in Indianapolis for dinner. I wasn’t about to nitpick and make the three hour drive unbearable.
However, for the entire two hours and fifty-seven minutes that it took to get to Erica’s house, he talked about Dahlia. He groveled over how little and precious she was, how beautiful she was, how much she looked like Aeysha, yadda, yadda, yadda. He never mentioned how good I looked in my faux leather jogger suit. He never mentioned how good the Chanel No. 5 smelled on my skin. Compared to Dahlia, I wasn’t even in the fucking car.
I zoned out completely. I stared out of the window, putting all of my tension into biting the acrylic nail on my thumb. That feeling of being second best was nauseatingly sitting in the pit of my stomach.
As yet another call from Chance flashed on my iPhone screen that was on silent, the tension became so much worse. Chance had been straight blowing my phone up since he got back to Chicago. I had to think of something fast to get him off of my tail. I couldn’t be attached to him in any way, shape, or form. I thought sending him to Minnesota would work, but he was even too stupid to flip a brick! Who runs through twenty-five grand with nothing to show for it?!
Urgh!
I couldn’t afford to give Chance anything more than what I owed him. I gave Omari the money he needed to set up the blocks on the South Side with Capone. He did give it back once money started to be made, but it was in my savings, which I was not about to touch. If I ever came up in the investigation of Aeysha’s murder, I needed that savings just in case I had to go on the run.
Besides, Chance and I had a deal. I kept my end of the bargain. He wasn’t about to blackmail me because he was irresponsible with twenty-five thousand dollars. He could kiss my ass for all I cared.
I stared out of the window hypnotically, randomly responding to Omari as if I was listening, until we pulled up in front of Erica and her husband’s home. It was beautiful and huge; more than six thousand square feet. Since it was a waterfront home, there was a deeded boat dock in the back that could clearly be seen from the driveway. This was a home easily worth more than a million dollars.
“Wow. This is nice.”
As he pulled into the driveway, Omari replied, “Yeah. Her husband bought this house after he got some gig out here. This motherfucka nice.”
This would be Omari’s first time seeing his sister in about five years. He had never even met Erica’s husband that she married at a courthouse ceremony. Erica was Omari’s older sister and only sibling. They didn’t have the same father. They grew up on different sides of town, because she was raised by her dad, who had an estranged relationship with their mother. Due to constant fights between Omari’s mother and Erica’s father, Erica and Omari had been pretty estranged their whole life. It wasn’t until Aeysha was killed that Erica reached out to him. Now, they were attempting to mend their relationship, especially since Erica was about two months pregnant with Omari’s first niece or nephew.
Erica excitedly opened the door before we could even ring the doorbell.
I was immediately taken aback by her beauty. Her resemblance to Omari was uncanny. She had those signature gray eyes, and her physical appearance was just as stunning as Omari’s. She had such dark and gorgeous features that she looked exotic; almost Indian.
“Hi! Oh my God! I’m so happy to see you!”
Despite Omari carrying Dahlia in her car seat, Erica threw her arms around Omari.
Omari smiled happily. To give them room to embrace, I took Dahlia out his arms and he then was able to wrap his arms around his sister.
I couldn’t help but take in the ambiance of this crib! The twelve foot ceilings were overwhelming. The view of the lake out of the picture window was amazing.
Erica had definitely married well.
“Let me get a picture,” I heard a familiar voice from my past say in the distance. The familiarity hit me so hard that I damn near dropped Dahlia.
I looked up and locked eyes with Tre, who looked disgusted to see me.
Just looking at him brought back awful memories of last year. Looking him in the eyes so vividly reminded me of how I practically begged him to stay with me, to choose me over his wife. Chills ran down my spine as I remembered him literally fighting to get away from me and treating me like a disposable whore ever since.
“Baby, this is my brother, Omari, and his girlfriend, Simone.” Erica was so happy that she didn’t even notice the tension in Tre’s face.
On cue, I smiled and reached out to shake his hand. “Hello, Tre. Nice to meet you.”
“You too,” he barely said. He instantly switched his focus to Omari. His tone totally changed when speaking to him. “What’s up, Omari? I heard so much about you, man!”
Again, no one noticed the tension. Omari was shaking it up with Tre and Erica was busy getting Dahlia out of her chair. But me? Despite a cool exterior, I was boiling on the inside. So this was the wife? This was the bitch that was better than me? This was the bitch that had him treating me like yesterday’s trash?
Unlike my other significant others, Tre wasn’t into social media. He didn’t have a Facebook page, Instagram, or Twitter. Therefore, I wasn’t as able to find out about his wife or how she looked like I did Aeysha. He was always very discreet about his wife, never giving me any details about her. Like Omari, I had done a background check on Tre to find out where he lived. I knew that his wife’s name was Erica, but the fact that his wife and Omari’s sister were one in the same was blowing me away.
After meets and greets, we settled on an antique couch in a large living room. Again, I zoned out. I stared into the sixty inch flat screen that silently played a rerun of Scandal. Like Olivia Pope, once again I was being the good little mistress that kept my relationship with my lover well hidden. I sat there and listened to Tre overtly boast about how beautiful his wife was, how much he loved her, and how perfect their life was. I knew that each word was said with the intention of stabbing me in my broken heart. I should have been able to sit there and do the same. I had finally won. I finally had my own man. But in that living roo
m, I felt like a fifth wheel. The four of them – Tre, Erica, Omari, and Dahlia – they were family and connected by something that only Aeysha would have ever been able to fit in.
“So, Simone,” Erica said getting my attention as she sat beside me. Omari and Tre had started an intense conversation about the NBA playoffs, so I guess Erica was ready to pay me some attention. “This is my first baby, so I want to know from somebody with experience. I know you didn’t give birth to Dahlia, but how is it raising a baby?”
I bit my tongue. I swallowed the disgust. I fought the urge to roll my eyes. I smiled perfectly and said, “Oh I love it. It’s like she’s mine. The circumstances were unfortunate, but she is a good baby. I don’t have any children, so it’s like a blessing in disguise.”
Erica was saying some sappy shit about being pregnant for the first time and how when it was my turn I would love it, but I barely heard her. Tre’s voice overrode hers. I could hear him excusing himself to the kitchen.
I waited a few minutes before asking Erica, “Where is your restroom?”
“Oh, I’ll show you! Come on.”
“No,” I insisted. “I can find my way. Talk to your brother. It’s been a long time. Get as much in before Tre comes back and basketball takes over.”
She gave me quick directions to the restroom. I disappeared down a long hallway and followed the sounds of Tre, who was in the kitchen stirring a pot of what smelled like spaghetti.
“So that’s her?”
It’s like Tre knew I was coming. The sound of my voice didn’t scare, move, or faze him.
He continued stirring the pot while saying, “Get the fuck out, bitch.”
“It’s like that?”
“It’s been like that. Now get the fuck out, before I put yo’ ass out.”
He didn’t scare me, not in his house anyway. I knew that he wouldn’t get loud or put his hands on me with his wife a few feet away.
With a smirk, I said, “She’s pretty.”
“She’s beautiful. Way more beautiful than you.” That’s when his eyes met mine. He looked at me with eyes that dismissed everything I thought I stood for. When I thought I existed, his eyes told me that I was nothing. “Get. The. Fuck. Out.”
His threatening words didn’t scare me away, but the way he looked at me like I was the scum of the earth did.. His dismissive glare brought back familiar feelings that I’d worked damn hard to get rid of.
Omari
“Whad up, Capone?”
I took Capone’s call in the front yard of Erica’s crib. The living room was thick with conversation about relationships, marriages, and babies. Simone was all too involved with the conversation and was way too eager to involve me, so I was happy to have a reason to get the fuck out of there.
It’s not like I didn’t want to marry Simone. It’s not like I didn’t want another baby eventually. But Simone had always been very pressed on both issues. She went from finally being my woman to picking out wedding rings in the blink of an eye. I wasn’t ready for either. I was finally getting my life back on track. I was finally able to look at my baby and not burst into tears with thoughts of Aeysha. I was finally able to fuck Simone without feeling guilty.
A baby and marriage was nowhere in the cards anytime soon.
“Got some bad news for you.”
“Talk to me.”
I braced myself. Capone’s bad news could only be one of two things, both having to do with work. Anything to do with my drugs and bad news had a lot to do with either the police or a nigga robbing us.
“Ching’s case got dropped.”
But I was never expecting that.
“THE FUCK?!”
“I know, man.”
“Are you sure?!” Spit was flying from my mouth and my jaws clinched with fury as I spoke through gritted teeth.
“I swear. That nigga is home. Case was dropped yesterday on a technicality. No body and not enough evidence.”
This couldn’t be real. As I ended the call, sorrow took over me like the day I saw Aeysha’s heart stop beating. I knew that Ching was in jail for killing Ron, but, because he was in jail, I felt like God was making a way for him to pay for Aeysha’s death too. Those bars rescued him from my wrath. Those bars were his protection. Now on the other side of those bars, it was my duty to kill this nigga. No, I wasn’t a street nigga. Capone had to spend months showing me the ropes on this drug shit. But I didn’t need him to show me how to be a cold-hearted killer. Every time I thought about Ayesha being taken from me by anyone’s hands but God’s, being a killa was an instant persona that consumed the blood that flowed through me.
Four
Omari
Two days later, I was in my living room ready to make Ching pay for killing Aeysha.
“You know if we do this, you’re starting a war, right?”
I looked at Capone peculiarly. “We?”
Sarcastically, Capone laughed while licking the swisher that he’d just finished rolling full of the best loud we’d put on the streets since we set up camp on the South Side.
After successfully licking the swisher closed airtight, he told me, “Yea, we. You think I’m gon’ let you do this shit by yourself?”
I smiled on the inside. No matter how young Capone was, he had been loyal than a motherfucka since we linked up.
Since copping from Ching’s connect three months ago, Capone and I had successfully set up a trap house over east on Seventy-Ninth Street. We were flipping about three bricks a week. Mollies sold like crazy. In that three months, I was able to give Simone back the money she loaned me to cop. That was the first thing on my to-do list. Now, I was back to the regularly scheduled program; living, shopping, taking care of my family, and paying off mom’s crib.
Though Capone certainly put in more work in the streets since he was more knowledgeable, he treated me more like his boss then his partner. I guess because I was older than him and put in more bread than him, he gave me that respect.
“Besides, I think Ching foul as hell. He went too far.”
Capone looked at me cautiously. He knew that the subject of conversation was super sensitive for me. Just referring to Ching killing Aeysha set me off. But this kind of conversation was different. I was rectifying the situation, not mourning it.
“I’m riding with you all the way, homie. But are you sure?”
It was no question. Ching had fucked up my entire life, and even my daughter’s. Yes, I was still living, but I was a shell of the man that I once was. I was raising my daughter and living life, but it was all in a daze. All of my unconditional happiness for life was buried with Aeysha. I made good money. I had a beautiful daughter and a loyal woman. But none of that was able to fill a void that I walked around with every day.
If I had to live with this feeling of death every day, then it was only fair that the motherfuckas responsible for it felt it too.
“It’s no question.”
Capone sat back and pulled on the blunt. He stared into the air as if he was letting this all sink in. It was definitely something to meditate on. We were about to go to war with the man we used to work for, with the man that raised both of us.
“Just Ching?”
“Smoke, Black, and Bert too. Ching was in jail when Aeysha got killed, so he had to have one of them niggas do it.”
A noise could be heard in the hallway before Capone could respond. We quickly quieted our scheming until the coast was clear.
Eventually, the rumbling in the hallway stopped, but Capone still leaned in and spoke in a much lower tone. “So how we gon’ do this? You just trying to pop these niggas or what? They can’t be hard to find.”
“No. When I say war, I mean war. I’m going through they spots and taking shit. I’m causing a drought. I’m shooting up blocks… Then I’m killing them niggas.”
Simone
I was pissed. Both Tre and Omari could kiss my ass with their undying devotion to these hoes.
My fingers pounded on the keyboard like stiletto
heels on pavement. I was livid. I typed Tre a lengthy email full of hatred towards his smug ass, his “precious wife”, and their bound to be funny looking bundle of joy.
Further irritation began to make my blood boil as Chance continuously blew my phone up, as he had been doing for the past few days. He was getting restless. I figured it was time to do something.
Just as I clicked the send button in the Gmail window, I heard the ADT system chirp, signaling that the front door was opening. I broke my neck to leave the computer desk in the office and get to the window. Sure enough, Capone was leaving.
I marched out of the office and down the hallway. Rage was flowing from me so much that my skin felt hot with anger.
This was never going to end. He was always going to love Aeysha. She would always be a permanent fixture in our relationship.
“So, you’re willing to go to jail for her?”
My words shocked Omari, who was sitting coolly on the couch clicking through the Comcast channels.
“What are you talking about?”
“Ching! You’re about to kill him, Omari! Are you serious?!”
Instead of anger, I showed him hurt. I showed him a distraught woman that was tired of playing second to a woman that wasn’t even there anymore.
With tears in my eyes, I stood in the entryway of the living room portraying a broken heart rather than a vengeful killer. “You’re willing to kill Ching and end up in jail for the rest of your life?! What about me and Dahlia?! What are we suppose to do? What if his boys try to retaliate and kill you? What if I end up like Aeysha?! Did you think about that?!”
His heart went out to my tears. He stood from the couch and walked towards me as I stood in the entryway wiping away my distressed tears that were cloudy with Estee Lauder foundation.
When he tried to put his arms around me, I smacked his arms away.
“No! Tell me that you aren’t going to kill him. Promise me!”
Secrets of a Side Bitch 2 Page 4