“You’re my weakness.” I close my eyes at the admission. Everything Norman said was true. I do care about her just like I care for New Rhone.
“What about Guy Fowler?”
I shake my head. “He’s just a pawn. The Cartel had to send someone after you. The day he asked you out at Taco Shack was planned.”
She gasps. “How’d you know about that?”
“I know everything. I was there—I heard what he said, what you said. You fell right into his trap. The Cartel sent those guys to kidnap you. They were going to do it that night. I got to you first.”
“The men in the forest?”
“I know as much as you. Someone in the Cartel sent them after you. They know who I am because they stole my wallet, but I don’t know how they knew you were there.”
“Why don’t you kill them all?” she asks.
I tilt my head and look into her eyes. “I kill when it’s deserved. I don’t do it on a hunch. I need evidence, and a crime that fits the punishment. The men in the forest were carrying out the Cartel’s wishes. I don’t know the full story, and I acted hastily. I was crazed by what they did.” What I don’t tell her is that I enjoyed their fear, ate it up before I killed them.
“You should’ve told me everything,” Cataline says. “What made you think it would be better to shut me out?”
“The only people who know my secret are the ones who need to. Where it’s life or death. The staff knows I’m Hero, and mostly what I’m capable of, but only Norman knows injections make me that way. Even Carter is painstakingly kept in the dark about the specifics. When I tell others, it becomes their secret. That puts them in danger.” My hands rub together as I clear my throat again. “But that’s not the only reason. I hated the idea of you knowing that I’m responsible for all the bad in your life. If I’d saved your parents like I was meant to, you wouldn’t be here now.” I can’t stop myself from catching the lonesome tear that slithers down her cheek. “I just wanted to give you back what I took. You deserve to be happy, so I kept all the badness away. What I didn’t know was that I’d become the enemy. That in the end, I would be the one to destroy you.”
In a matter of twenty-four hours, my entire life has changed. The world as I know it has changed. There are superpowers, and people who want to steal me again. What’s supposed to be good is actually evil.
Calvin is watching me, patiently waiting for my response. My eyes dart between his as fast as my brain processes information. “I looked up to Hero,” I say quietly.
He steeples his hand over his nose and rubs his eyes. “I never meant for it to happen this way.”
“How could you do this to me while you’re out there saving everyone else?”
“I’ve always kept you safe,” he says, his voice rising. “I kidnapped you to save you. I know everything about you.” He juts his hand toward the door. “Why do you think the kitchen is stocked with your favorite foods? Everything in your closet is your exact size? Books I know you love, I bought for you.”
“I didn’t ask for any of that,” I say, my voice small.
“It was a mistake bringing you here. I thought I could control my urges, but instead I found new ones. I’ve only ever been with prostitutes or desperate women who let me do anything I want to them.”
My throat tingles. “Why are you telling me that?”
“Because you need to understand the kind of person I am. I’m not built for a girl like you. I’ve broken you over and over. And if you stay here, I will continue to.”
The light pouring in is suddenly too bright, and my wrists throb painfully with the speed of my heart. “If I stay here?”
His eyes drift down to my bandaged arms. He stares and stares until I think he’s never going to speak. Finally, he asks without looking up, “Did you mean to do it?”
“At night I’ve prayed for Hero to save me from you. But he’s not coming. Because you are him, and he is you.” I force myself to also look at the wrists I tried to empty. When the knife sliced into my skin, it was a special kind of ecstasy. Watching the blood pour out didn’t scare me. “I don’t even know how I got there. I just remember the feeling.” I blink up to find his eyes back on my face. “It felt more right than anything I’ve done since I arrived.” The look he gives me could almost pass for anguish if I believed he was at all capable of such a thing. “Yes,” I say. “You bent me so hard that I finally broke. But I loved you anyway.”
The stillness that follows is palpable. I understand that I simultaneously love and hate him the way he is simultaneously good and evil. I can’t grasp why that matters, though, because they just feel like words to me now. The only truth I comprehend is that good and bad, love and hate, right and wrong, captor and captive—none cannot exist without its opposite.
“I’m going to give you what you wanted all along,” he says.
My dry eyes blink slowly. Does he know he’s what I wanted all along? Does he know about the crush I had a lifetime ago, when he was something to look forward to each day?
“Your freedom,” he says. “I’ll arrange it.”
My head is light, my body heavy. This is what I wanted. This is what I ran for, what I jumped for. Any concept of love is irrelevant, because I don’t know this man. I know nothing about my hero, and so, I know nothing about myself. He wields that much power over me. Not only did he take my body, my mind, and eventually my heart, but now he’s ripped me of my sanity, of the capability to feel anything.
I don’t know what he expects from me as he watches and waits. Relief? Defiance? Does he think after learning the truth I could love him enough to stay?
“Okay,” I say.
“Okay?”
“Yes. Make the arrangements.”
I can’t expect Cataline to want to stay crushed in my tightening fingers, but to release her feels wrong. It’s the knowledge that I’m what’s most harmful to her that urges me to stand from her bedside. It’s the horror of her loving me that makes me walk out the door.
Norman stands waiting in the study with his hands folded in front of him. “How did it go?”
I nod once. “It’s time for her to go.”
“You’re making the right decision.”
“Somehow I knew you’d say that.”
“Where will you send her?”
“Does it matter?” I ask. “Anywhere that’s not here. Somewhere neither the Cartel nor I can touch her. Let the office know I won’t be in for a while. Carlos will have my undivided focus from now until Cataline’s left the country.”
“I’ll start getting things in order. I do think it’s best I handle Cataline from here.”
I squint at him and cross my arms over my chest. “I’m not an idiot, Norman. Don’t tell me what’s best.”
“Fine, sir. It’s just that she trusts me.”
My nostrils flare. “Why shouldn’t she? You’ve spent the last three months fussing over her.”
“If you go to her with a plan, she might think it’s another trap.”
“I get it. I understand. If not for me, she might be drugged senseless and shoved into the role of Cartel prostitute. But you’re right. I’m the one who trapped her.”
“You’re exaggerating. They only wanted her to get to you. They have no use for her otherwise.”
“Is that so? Tell me more, Wise One. Let’s say their plan worked, and, using Cataline as bait, they got me where they wanted me. Let’s say they killed me. You think their next step would be to send her on her merry way after all she’d seen?”
“It would take a great deal to kill you, sir.”
“So I should’ve taken that chance is what you’re saying?”
“I think there were options you chose to ignore. But it’s too late now, and we have to deal with the mess. In fact, I should go check in on her.”
“Right, go ahead. Run to her room and feed her chicken soup as you wipe her tears.”
“Don’t get defensive when you’ve put yourself in this position. All I’ve done is treat her li
ke a human being. I warned you to be careful.”
“Just go,” I say, rubbing my temples. “I’ve had enough for one day.”
“I’d say we all have. She needs some time to recover, but then I think it’s best she leaves at once.”
“Good,” I say. “Fine.”
When Norman’s gone, I scrub my hands over my face. Cataline won’t let me be. Cataline wild at the window. Frowning when she lost at eight-ball. Hugging my neck after being mistaken for a prostitute.
She haunts me, and it continues for days.
I’m selfish. I can’t watch her go. Norman has his instructions. When the sun rises on the morning of her departure, I’m already on the road to New Rhone.
My parents decided my fate before I was even born. When they died, that fate was sealed. I’m charged with making the world a better place, with serving justice in their absence. As I leave the mansion, it occurs to me that I’m driving away from the only thing I ever actually wanted for myself.
Norman gives me a medium-sized suitcase, but I don’t have anything to put in it. I arrived with nothing, and as I stare into the closet full of expensive pieces, all I can think is that these things aren’t mine.
When Norman finds me in the same place he left me, he tells me to leave my suitcase and leads me up the forbidden staircase. I’ve cut the memory of Calvin as Hero off at the root every time, but now that I’m back in the doorway, it’s proving difficult. I turn my face and inhale deeply as Norman waits. When I’ve collected myself, I enter what appears to be another study. I can’t imagine Calvin picking out the rug with threadbare spots that sits under a large, oak desk. Yellow lamps break up brown leather chairs and wooden end tables. Worn book spines are organized by author. I glance at Norman from under my lashes and then at the phone centered on the desk’s surface.
“For emergencies only,” Norman says. “It takes incoming calls only. Sources around the city alert us to imminent danger. They don’t know too many specifics. Master Parish likes it that way. Demands it, rather,” he says with a hedging smile. “You know me as a butler, but my most important job is to receive calls, investigate their validity, and send Hero on assignment.”
The alarm-like ringing throughout the house that sends Norman running every time makes more sense now. I walk over to a bulletin board covered in newspaper articles and photographs.
“That’s my doing,” Norman says from behind me, and I can hear the smile in his voice. “Master Parish despises it. There isn’t much to show because he insists on limited exposure, but it’s important to me to track our progress and success.”
I finger an article: “Hero Strikes Again? Witnesses claim mystery man lifts overturned car to rescue elderly couple”
“He’s a good man, Cataline. He’s done a lot of good here. As you can see, he loves this city, and it loves him back.”
“His parents did this?” I ask.
Norman sighs. “It’s complicated. Their intentions were good. They meant for him to be an answer. It was their passion for progress, humanity, and their only son that fueled them to perfect that formula. I’m not sure how much Master Parish told you, but New Rhone was only the beginning. They wanted every major city to have its own Calvin.” He shakes his head. “He’d never share the injections, though. He doesn’t think of himself as anyone’s hero.”
“Stop,” I say. The article’s black words blur together. I swallow it back just as quickly because I’m not that girl anymore. And I don’t know the man Norman speaks of.
“There’s a secret door,” Norman volunteers. When I turn, he gestures to the opposite wall. I peer closely but see nothing. Norman demonstrates by tapping a spot on the wall to uncover a hidden keypad. After typing in a code and scanning his thumb, the entire wall rises to reveal a pair of steel doors. It’s an elevator, but more importantly, it’s validation for all the manic searching I did for secret exits around the house.
“Downstairs is Hero’s . . . lair, if you will. It houses his armor, weapons, the security system. It’s completely protected should we ever need it to be. His body is his best weapon and the key to his survival, but he needs his tools as well.”
“Tools?”
“Of course. We never know what he might encounter. Tranquilizer darts, retractable, industrial strength rope, chloroform capsules. Those are just the things he keeps in his belt.”
“Chloroform? Is that what he used on me?”
“Yes. And then I gave you a mild tranquilizer when you arrived.”
“What makes you think that’s okay?”
He shrugs. “I suspect it was a nicer way of knocking you out than whatever the Cartel had planned.”
I cross my arms. “Why are you telling me all this?”
“You must be curious. You know the secret now, so I don’t see the harm.”
“I don’t care what Calvin needs to justify his psychotic behavior.” It’s a lie. I am curious about the downstairs space, which I envision as a dark and dank cave filled with the things of comic books.
“There’s no Batmobile or anything like that,” Norman says, and my eyes grow big. In light of recent events, I’m not entirely sure they can’t read my thoughts. “The car’s in the garage. He drives a high-class vehicle, but there’s not much more to it than your average car, aside from bulletproof windows and some upgrades catered to speed and agility. Much like Master Parish himself,” he murmurs, chuckling.
“Is this funny?” I ask. “I’m sorry, I just—is there some humor in the situation I’m not seeing?”
“Oh, dear, no,” Norman says, rushing to my side. He surprises me with a strong hug. “I don’t find pleasure in any of this. And though you may not believe me, the same is true for Master Parish. He’s not the monster you believe him to be.”
“Then you don’t know him as well as you think,” I say, limp in his arms. “Either that, or your definition of monster needs updating.”
He sniffles in my ear as his chest crackles against me. This old man, who has devoted his life to helping from the wings, is going to cry right here while he holds me.
“You’re a good girl.” His voice splits down the middle. “He just wants to keep you safe. That’s why he took you. That’s why he’s sending you away.”
“He’s not sending me away,” I say, my first flicker of anger returning. I wrestle out of Norman’s embrace and step back. “He’s giving me back something he took. That wasn’t his to take in the first place.” Norman’s face falls. “What’s the next step?” I ask.
“Cataline—”
I squeeze my eyes shut and clench my hands into two solid fists. “The plan, Norman. I’m not free until I’m free. What’s the plan? Where am I going?”
“Sit,” he says with a defeated sigh, gesturing to a chair in front of the desk. He takes the seat next to me and slides a pile of papers into his lap. He shows me a long, rectangular envelope. “Your plane ticket,” he says. “New Rhone is no longer your home.”
I swallow. My head shakes involuntarily. “I’ve never wanted to be anywhere else.”
“You have to go. These people only want you as a means to an end. They have no regard for your life like Master Parish does.”
I look out the window and nod.
“You have a full few days of travel ahead of you. You’ll be staying each night of the next week in a new location to throw anyone off the scent.” He hesitates. “You will pick up a new ticket in each place you land. I can’t tell you your final destination, just that someone will be waiting there for you.”
“It’s that serious? They’d follow me out of New Rhone?”
“We’re not sure, but Master Parish is insistent we take all precautions. Your safety is his responsibility, or so he believes.”
“It’s not.”
“In any case, do not tell anyone of your plans. Carter is fully briefed on the situation. He’ll take you directly to the airport and see to it that you get on the plane safely. He’s been on staff as long as anyone, and he’s
the strongest, most capable man we have.”
“Aside from Calvin.”
“Yes, aside from Calvin. But, uh, he’s indisposed today.”
“Of course,” I say. “I don’t expect another minute of his time.”
He clears his throat. “Very well.” He holds up a blue booklet and passes it to me. “Your new passport.” He averts his eyes when he says, “You’re no longer Cataline Ford.”
My fingers tighten around its smoothness. “What if I don’t agree to any of this?” I ask. “What if I want to be Cataline, and I want to go back to work at Parish Media, and I want to go home and see Frida and live in New Rhone? Why can’t I do that?”
“I suppose you can if you don’t think their threat is serious. But Calvin will always be here. He’ll never leave this city.”
“Then why not kill everyone involved? If he wants to protect me so fervently, why not just wipe out the bad guys?”
“The people of New Rhone love and respect Hero, therefore they let him do what needs to be done. In a way, they protect him too. If he were to start killing recklessly, he’d lose their support. You must understand, without this, Master Parish has nothing.”
I sigh. “I know. The city should be his first priority.”
Norman tilts his head to catch my gaze. “Not only that, but you’ve told me you hated that job and what you really want is to pursue photography.”
I look down at the paperwork in my lap, thumbing the passport open. The picture is the same as the one from my license, which I haven’t seen since before I arrived. But the name next to it is different. Jennifer Dean. “I did,” I say. “I guess I still do.”
“When you stayed with the Andersons, Calvin gave them a stipend for your care.”
My head jerks up. “What?”
“After you left, they were instructed to send you a monthly allowance. Apparently that money never made it to you. It’s all here, some cash, some in a savings account, plus credit cards in your new name.” Another envelope, this one large and heavy, lands in my lap. He gives me the warmest smile I’ve ever received. “Enough to do—well, whatever your heart desires. This is your chance to start over, dear. Live the life you’ve deserved ever since their death.”
Hero Page 21