Seeing Lana grin was even better than the thick slices of banana bread Madge kept putting on their plates. They ate until Madge was satisfied…long past the point of being stuffed. Lana told Madge about Killian and her family and about the party they’d abandoned. She told her about Moose Springs and the group’s investments and how she wasn’t getting along as well as she’d hoped.
“You’ve always been a loner, child, and not by choice. Sometimes the more you want to have a connection with someone, the harder it is to make it happen. The best thing to do is sit back and let the world bring your people to you. Isn’t it better to have one or two of the right ones instead of a hundred wrong ones?”
Lana glanced at Rick, worrying at her lower lip. Madge looked knowingly between them. “I think we are who we are, not who we planned on being.”
Then they were told that they absolutely must stay the night. There would be plenty of time to go back to Chicago in the morning.
“I made up Zoey’s bed for you, child.” Madge said. “Young man, you can have the couch.”
“I’d rather sleep on the couch if you don’t mind,” Lana said. “I have a lot of fond memories of that couch.”
“That couch has some questionable memories of you.” Madge patted her head. “I’ll get your quilt.”
“You have a quilt?” Rick asked Lana, chuckling.
“And a pillow. I’ve spent a lot of time in this house over the years.”
“Come on. You too,” Madge said to Rick, grabbing his arm and dragging him through the house. “I’ll get you some night clothes.”
* * *
Lana had learned early that there was never a shortage of sleepwear in the Caldwell household.
The options were endless and endlessly amusing. Holiday socks with jingling bells, pumpkin and scaredy-cat pajama bottoms, more soft flannel and fluffy fleece in bright colors, none of which had any hope of matching.
Rick, quiet and reserved as he was, had settled on a pair of men’s pajama pants that said “BootyTastic.”
“Are you okay in the bedroom?” Lana asked him after Madge went to bed. She kept pinching his bootytastic rear end, which Rick seemed to be taking in stoic stride.
“Feels a long way from you,” he said. “Are you sure—?”
“Madge will come out in fifteen minutes to check on us.” Lana giggled. “Do you want to risk her wrath if she finds me with you?”
“Hmm…good point. You should sneak in after twenty minutes.”
After such a long day and night, Lana was exhausted. Fully intending to go meet up with Rick after Madge was asleep, Lana laid her head down on her pillow. She must have passed out instantly, because the next thing she knew, it was the middle of the night and more than a little chilly. Soft footsteps woke her.
Rick was in the hallway just off the living room, peering at the fuse box.
“Rick?” she called softly. “Is everything okay?”
“The furnace went out,” he told her quietly. “I checked the fuse box, and it blew a fuse. Do you know if Madge has any extra fuses?”
“Her workshop is in the garage. She keeps her tools behind the Harley. I can show you.”
“I’ll find it.” Rick added kindly, “Go back to sleep. I’ll get it going again.”
Knowing he was fixing the heat wasn’t only nice. It was also incredibly sexy. Sexy enough that Lana didn’t go back to sleep. Instead, she snuggled up in her quilt, watching a small light through the mudroom door, showing him moving about in the garage. He returned a couple of minutes later with a small package of multisized fuses.
“That used to be Zoey’s job. When the fuses blew, she would change them out for Madge. It’s hard on her fingers to grasp things that small.”
“My dad has arthritis too,” Rick said absently.
“Does he live in Moose Springs?”
For some reason, it bothered her that she hadn’t met Rick’s father. As he looked for the right size fuse, Rick glanced over at her, looking amused. “Don’t give me the lip, gorgeous. I would have introduced you if my parents weren’t busy playing golf in Florida right now.”
“There wasn’t a lip,” she protested, but maybe there was. And when he shut the fuse box, the furnace once more humming, Rick walked over to her.
He sank down to a knee next to the couch, brushing her hair out of her eyes. Chuckling, he tapped her lip with his thumb. “No?”
“Definitely not. Montgomerys don’t pout.” She poked a finger into his pajama pants. “You really are bootytastic.” She waggled her eyebrows at him.
“I try.” His palm slid over her hip where the hem of her own pants had dipped to reveal her hipbone. He squeezed her gently, as if tempted. Then Rick shook his head. “You’ve had a long day. You need to get some rest.”
Okay, this time, there might have been the tiniest hint of a lip.
“Or I can get you some more banana bread,” Rick added.
Tempting as that was, Lana slipped her hand behind his neck, pulling Rick in for a long, slow kiss. “I like it when you talk banana bread,” she said to him, scooting tight to the back pillows of the couch to make room for him. A low, warm chuckle accompanied his equally warm arm wrapping around her waist, drawing her into his warm, flannel-y form.
“Lana? Tonight at the party…your mom told me some stuff. About you and the company.”
“Yeah? Did she scare you away?” Snuggling in, Lana looked at him. “Mom loves to give everyone a thorough interrogation if they’re interested in me.”
“I’m not scared,” Rick told her. “I just didn’t realize how important to them you are. It’s really huge. Your job…your place in that room tonight. You matter.”
“It’s the family business. We’re all worker bees doing our parts.”
“Are you? Because what it looked like to me was everyone was circling you like the heir apparent.”
Lana didn’t answer immediately. “It’s not for certain. Silas is trying to make a move for the company by discrediting me. Killian was my strongest supporter.”
“And now?”
“Now I have to watch my back. Especially if I don’t want anything bad to happen to Moose Springs.”
Rick tilted his head. “What do you mean?”
“Work is the last thing I want to think about now.” When he simply waited, Lana closed her eyes. “If I tell you, you’ll hate me.”
“Or you could let me decide,” Rick replied quietly. He threaded her fingers inside his, as if knowing instinctively they were starting to shake. “Lana, I’m your person. I have you, sweetheart.”
Opening her eyes, Lana nodded. “Okay. Silas is gathering votes to liquidate the Moose Springs properties and halt construction on the condos. He wants to wait until the Shaws go bankrupt.”
Rick went still.
Swallowing hard, Lana said quickly, “I’ll fix this. I won’t let it happen.”
“Sounds like it’s already happening.”
“Rick, I promise I won’t let it go through. Whatever I have to do, I’ll do it. Please trust me.”
Lana braced herself, waiting for him to get angry. To tell her she was the worst thing to happen to his town. That good intentions had resulted in terrible consequences, and now, even if she helped the town, it was because she had broken it in the first place.
Taking her face in his hands, Rick kissed her instead. A long, slow kiss, his body strong and solid against her. “I trust you, Lana. I love you. How could I not?”
His words were so soft, his touch gentle as he drew her in closer.
“You love me?” she asked in a whisper.
A sweet smile curved his lips. “I was a goner by the time you walked out the door of my pool hall.”
“I love you too.” She’d never said that, taken that risk or that leap before. “We made a mess of this Christmas fling, d
idn’t we?”
Rick didn’t answer, instead pressing the softest of kisses to her temple.
In hindsight, when he lingered, gazing down into her eyes as if trying to memorize this moment…she should have asked him why he was saying these things now. Instead, Lana reached for him, letting Rick’s strong hands take her problems away.
* * *
Rick’s intentions had been aiming toward the seductive, but trying to be quiet so that they didn’t disturb Madge resulted in far more giggles from her than other noises.
As they lay there, Lana and her fuzzy pajamas tucked into his form, Rick realized something very important. It wasn’t that he loved her. Rick had loved Lana Montgomery for a very long time. He had always understood that Lana was made for bigger things than a guy and a worn-down pool hall in a tiny corner of the world. It had just been nice to pretend for a while that what they had would last. But she had places to go, very important things to do. While he could never resent that—because he was so proud of her, he couldn’t see straight—he also couldn’t be a part of it.
Every interaction he’d had so far with her family, in her world, had shown him that whatever this was, it was destined to be short. At least it had been sweet.
He’d kept Jen tied to him, thinking love would be enough to make her accept a small-town life. For her to be happy. But Jen had never been happy, because it wasn’t enough to love someone. You had to have your dreams too. The Montgomery Group was Lana’s future, and she was going to do such amazing things for the world. But she couldn’t do those things in Moose Springs, and not with him pulling her down.
Loving her had been the absolutely best thing that had ever—and would ever—happen to Rick. But he knew what he needed to do. This holiday romance was destined to run its course. Rick wasn’t taking her down, dragging this out, or hurting a woman he desperately loved. No, it was time.
He had to let Lana go.
* * *
The roads were icy that morning. Since they were both used to the slick conditions but only one of them kept getting work emails and updates about Killian on their phone, Rick drove.
Zoey’s grandmother had filled them to the stuffing point before allowing them to leave, causing Lana to feel pleasantly sleepy.
“The only thing better than the milkshakes are Madge’s biscuits and gravy,” she decided contentedly.
“Lana, we need to talk.”
Those words were never good. Lana turned to make a joke, then she saw the way Rick’s hand gripped the steering wheel.
“Ah.”
Two letters, one word. Neither of which did justice to the feeling of utter dread ripping through her right now.
“I need to go back to Moose Springs. Diego’s responsible, but he’s never had to handle a delivery shipment or pay the bills. My landlady’s not going to appreciate it if rent doesn’t get paid. Plus, I don’t want him to be alone on Christmas.”
Rick’s voice was quiet, his eyes locked on the road. Every single muscle in his arm was tensed.
“You’re breaking up with me.” She didn’t even need to phrase it as a question. Lana hadn’t said the words accusingly, but Rick still flinched.
“It’s not because I want to,” he told her, voice lowering to a rough whisper.
“And yet, here we are, full of too many carbohydrates, and you’re about to end things.”
Finally, he looked at her.
“Is there a reason why? Or should we call an end to a good thing and say we’ll still be friends?”
Trying for breezy and light only fell flat. Rick pulled off the road, hitting the hazard lights. “Lana, we both know the reason.”
“It’s because of Silas’s power play, isn’t it? Rick, I swear I’m going to fix—”
He cut her off with a shake of his head. “That’s not why. Am I worried about what might happen? Yeah. But I’ve been worried every day for years about whether my business will keep afloat. If I’m screwing up by not taking tourists’ money. If I’m screwing up with Diego after all. I worry all the damn time, Lana. What’s happening with the group is just more of the same.”
Rick’s hands gripped the steering wheel too tight as he sat there staring out at the expanse of snowy crop fields. “That’s how it’s always been. When you live in Moose Springs, you never have control of what happens to you. You just have to survive what’s constantly being thrown at you.”
“Like me.”
Hazel eyes found hers, despite her attempts not to look at him. “You are the best thing to happen to me. You’re amazing, Lana. Which is why this isn’t going to work and why I’m not going to hurt both of us by dragging it out.”
“I don’t understand,” she said softly. “You told me you loved me last night. I refuse to believe that wasn’t what you truly feel. So how does ‘I love you’ turn into ‘let’s break up’ by the next morning?”
“Your shoes click.”
She had no idea what that meant.
“I never noticed it before.” Rick pressed on in a gruff voice. “I mean, I did. But when you were with your family, every woman’s shoes clicked on the floor. Every man was wearing slacks.”
“You’re ending this because of my shoes?”
“No. I am just starting to realize that we live in different worlds. Your world is a lot bigger and a lot more important than mine. Being with me…your loyalty to my town…it’s costing you.”
“Whatever my mother said—”
“What she said was you might lose control of the Montgomery Group. A multibillion-dollar company. Lana, this is just a holiday fling. I didn’t realize what the stakes were at play. I can’t cost you that.”
“The choices I make in my professional life are my own, Rick.” Lana’s voice caught on his name.
“I know. And I have the choice to make things harder for you or to walk away.”
He made a soft, soothing noise in his throat, as if she were a deer about to shy away. Lana didn’t feel like a deer; she felt like a lion, digging its claws in, desperate not to let something good slip out of her hands.
She didn’t want to lose him.
“We don’t have anything in common, Lana. And this has been so good…” Rick’s voice choked, and he stopped talking. He cleared his throat roughly before continuing. “I’ve loved every minute with you. You make me laugh, and you make everything so much better. But one day, you’re going to wake up and realize the guy at the pool hall in some nowhere town doesn’t wear slacks on a Tuesday.”
“You’re being amazingly insulting to both of us.”
“Sweetheart, we don’t fit. And when you realize it, I don’t want to be a decade in and too far gone to survive watching you walk away. The first time gutted me, but you…I don’t think I’d get over it. You don’t know the damage you could do without even trying.”
Anger flared inside her. “Don’t you think I’m scared too? Rick, I’ve never told a man I loved him in my life. I don’t do flings, because I don’t want temporary. I want real. I want permanent. I want a home and a family and a life with someone. And I thought…”
She stopped midsentence because it wasn’t fair to tell him she’d wanted that with him. Not when she was the one destined to walk away.
“I don’t know what this could have been, but I’m not making another woman miserable by tying her to my side. I won’t go through that again, Lana.”
Lana would not cry. She would not. “It’s not my job to fix what your ex-wife broke. It’s not my responsibility to prove myself because she couldn’t.”
“I know. But it’s my choice to walk away before I get hurt. Before we both do.”
He was doing this with the quiet acceptance of a man who had decided he was beat.
Unable to stop the silent tears from leaking down her cheeks, Lana said in a hurt voice, “You’re not going to fight for us at all
, are you?”
That flash of heat filled his eyes, that determination, that fire she only saw when he was holding her in his arms. “This isn’t what I want, gorgeous. But it’s the right thing to do. I can’t give you what you need. I can’t be what you need.”
“I never asked you for anything. I never wanted you to be anything or anyone other than who you are. I refuse to fight for a man who won’t do the same for me. Either you’re in or you’re out, Rick.”
He didn’t answer, but that was all the answer she needed.
Lana wanted to scream. She wanted to kick him in the leg for being an idiot. She wanted to cry, because he was breaking her heart into a million pieces, and she didn’t think she’d ever be able to glue them back together again in the right places.
But Montgomerys didn’t make scenes. They accepted tough news with decorum and grace. Sometimes the only thing to do was keep her head held up high.
“I’ll arrange for a flight home for you, dearest,” Lana said, because she didn’t know if he had the money saved up to get himself back. Chicago was beautiful during the holidays, but broken up or not, Rick was the best man she’d ever met. The last thing she would do was strand him at Christmas.
Not with someone he was done with.
Chapter 16
The hospital room was silent except for the steady beeping of the vital signs monitor. Lana sat in the plush chair placed next to the side of Killian’s bed, careful to be as quiet as possible. His eyes were closed.
“The surgery to stop the bleeding worked. I guess I’m not dying after all.”
Killian’s Adam’s apple moved as he swallowed hard.
“You almost sound disappointed.” Lana poured him a glass of water from the pitcher at his bedside.
Gone were his impeccable manners, replaced by a hand nearly crushing the thin plastic cup as it shook. He knew he’d badly injured his spine. Reminding him of that wasn’t going to help. Not when unshed tears glistened in his eyes.
Mistletoe and Mr. Right Page 31