by SJ McCoy
Antonio grinned. “That’s pretty much what I told her, but I said I’d ask anyway. I didn’t want to make your decisions for you.”
“Thanks. Have you spoken to Marcos?”
“Yeah. I talked to him this morning.”
“And what did he say?”
Antonio chuckled. “The first words out of his mouth were, hell, no. Then he said to check with you and see what you wanted.”
She smiled. “He really doesn’t feel the need to put family and social stuff first anymore, does he?”
“To borrow his words—hell, no. I don’t know what possessed him when we were kids, but he learned the hard way—and learned the lesson well, that you don’t give up what you know you want for yourself, for what you think other people want for you.”
She blew out a sigh. “I just wished he’d figured it out sooner.”
Antonio smiled. “Me, too, but at least he figured it out. Some people live out their whole lives missing out on what they truly want because they did what they thought was right—and made themselves miserable in the process. You two get another chance—while you’re still young enough. Don’t waste it.”
Molly laughed. “Still young enough? For what?”
Antonio laughed. “Sorry. Babies. I’ve got babies on the brain. Every day I try to talk Mary Ellen into agreeing that we don’t have to wait.”
Molly’s smile faded. “We might still be young enough, but …” She stopped herself. Maybe Antonio didn’t know that Marcos couldn’t have kids. He’d always been a private person. Perhaps he hadn’t told his family. She’d have to ask him before she went talking about it.
“But what?”
She shook her head with a smile. “But nothing.”
“Okay. I should get going. I guess I’ll see you when you two get done holing up and hiding out.”
“Yeah. I guess you will. I want us to have some time to find out who we’re going to be together before we have to figure out who we’re going to be as a couple with the rest of you.”
Antonio got up and smiled. “Okay. I’ll tell Mom, and I’ll tell the others, too. No plans for big gatherings until you give the okay.”
She laughed. “Thanks.”
Once he’d gone, Molly checked her watch. The lunchtime rush would start soon, and she’d wanted to run home before it did. She assumed that Marcos would stay with her tonight. He’d said he should get in at around five, and she’d told Grady that he was in charge of Molly’s again for the weekend.
~ ~ ~
Marcos turned the car off the road into one of the scenic pullout points. He was almost home, and this view had always made him feel like he was home. He needed to take a minute. He wanted to stretch his legs—it was a long drive from Summer Lake—but, more than that, he wanted to get straight with himself before he drove down into town and saw Molly. He wanted to mark the moment. It was an important one—perhaps the most important of his life. It marked a new beginning. He got out of the car and looked out over the valley. He loved Napa. He’d loved his life here, and he sure as hell wished he’d never left it.
From this vantage point, he could see rolling hills covered in vines, row after row. Wine had been his life—it was the foundation of his whole family. He hadn’t missed the wine business, though. He’d lost his passion for it at some point during his marriage—maybe he’d just discovered that it had never been that important to him; it was just what he thought he was supposed to do. Like going back to Italy, taking a wife from a good Sicilian family, having a son. He shook his head sadly. He’d discovered that none of it mattered to him. None of it except having a son—or a daughter—or a whole bunch of them. The discovery that he couldn’t have children had been a blow to his soul. He blew out a big sigh. It wasn’t something he could change. He had to stay focused on what he could change. And the most important thing he could change now was the course of his life—and Molly’s. He knew she still loved him. He knew she was still wary of him. The only thing that would change that was spending time together, showing her, proving to her that this time was different—that he was different.
He got back into the car. He couldn’t prove anything to her while he was up here staring out at the view.
Downtown felt so familiar as he drove through it. He smiled as he passed Antonio’s wine bar, Muse. His little brother had done well for himself. When they were younger, he’d been viewed as the playboy who might not amount to much, while Marcos was the more serious one, the driven one. He shrugged. He was back on track now. He was more relaxed with himself, and he’d found his drive again. This time his goal was to finally make Molly his wife and hopefully have a family. They could adopt a kid. He loved that she was open to the idea. They’d have to talk about it … and he had to stop getting ahead of himself. It’d all come in good time. If he got things right with her.
He passed through town and out the other side, then took a familiar right turn going out a couple of miles until he turned again onto the lane that led to Molly’s dad’s place. Her dad’s family had lived here for generations on a small acreage that they’d farmed. He was surprised that Molly hadn’t moved out and found a place of her own. When he’d asked her about it last weekend, she’d explained that her dad had moved to Arizona a couple of years ago. She’d stayed with him until then, and when he left he’d asked her to take care of the place.
He pulled up in front of the small white rancher. It looked like she’d taken very good care of it. The yard was immaculate with hanging baskets outside the front door. The house looked freshly painted. The vegetable garden was planted in neat regimented rows.
The front door opened and there she was. She looked amazing in jean shorts and a pink T-shirt, her hair falling loosely around her shoulders. The sight took him back to when he was a teenager, all the times he’d come out here to pick her up for their dates.
He smiled and got out of the car.
“You made it.” She came up the path to greet him.
“I did.” He held his arms out to her, and she ran the rest of the way to him and jumped on him, wrapping her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist.
He sank his fingers in her hair and kissed her. “Damn, I missed you,” he said when they finally came up for air.
“I missed you more. I can’t believe you’re here.” She hung onto his neck with one arm and swept the other out over the house and the yard. “I never thought I’d see you in this place again.”
“I dreamed of being here again, with you.”
She unwrapped her legs and slid down to the ground with a smile. “So, how about we make some dreams come true?” She gave him a mischievous smile.
“What are you up to?” he asked. “What kind of trouble have you got on your mind?
She laughed. “I want to recreate some memories.”
He followed her gaze to the shed at the bottom of the yard by the orchard and laughed when he understood what she meant. They’d made a lot of good memories in that shed. When he used to have to have her home by eleven, she’d come back out of her bedroom window, and they’d hang out in the shed, fooling around. They’d almost had their first time in there, he’d be forever grateful to the deer that had come through the yard, scaring them both back into their pants. Their first time had been a few weeks later in his bed, on the family estate when his parents were away.
She was watching his face. “What are you thinking?”
“That I’d love to fool around with you in there again, but that I’m glad our first time didn’t happen in there.”
She laughed. “Me too. I was convinced that deer was my dad coming out.”
“We both were. How is he?”
“He’s happy. He lives in one of those over fifty-five communities. He’s made loads of friends, and he’s involved in all kinds of groups and activities. He has a girlfriend, but he won’t admit that to me.”
“How do you feel about that?”
“I’m happy
for him. He deserves some love.” She smiled. “And so do we. Are you going to come in, or are we going to stand out here talking?”
He went back to the car for his bag and followed her into the house. It was different than he remembered. He’d know this was Molly’s place just by stepping through the door. It had her stamp all over it. It was cozy and welcoming. There were lots of little Molly touches everywhere. An elegant chandelier hung over a rustic dining table. The kitchen was sleek and modern, and there were vases of sunflowers dotted around everywhere. “I always loved your house, and I love it even more now.”
“You do?”
“Yeah. It’s so you.”
“Thanks. I wasn’t sure I wanted to stay when Dad left. I’d been thinking about getting a condo in town, but …” She shrugged. “Then he asked me to stay and take care of it, so I did.”
“You’re not a condo in town kind of girl, but is this where you want to stay?”
She shrugged again. “Yes and no. I’d love a bigger house, more land, but this place has been in the family for generations. I couldn’t give it up, and I can’t let my dad down. He wants me to stay and take care of it—so, I do.”
Marcos nodded. He had visions of buying them a beautiful home, maybe a waterfront estate on the river, but if she didn’t want to leave, he’d live here with her—if she’d have him. He didn’t want to just land himself on her, though. He’d rented a house a little farther out from town. He wanted to spend all the time he could with her, but he wanted it to be a choice, not an obligation. He’d love to come into her life and her home tonight and never leave, but he knew she needed time to figure out if that was what she wanted.
She confirmed his thinking when she asked, “Where are you going to stay?”
“I rented a place near the estate.”
She nodded, looking thoughtful.
“What?” he asked.
“I’m probably getting ahead of myself, but if … if we do … if things work out between us, how would you feel about living here?”
He smiled, more at the fact that she was seeing it as a possibility than at the prospect of living here. “You know I’ve always loved this place.”
She laughed. “Yeah, when it was my dad’s house. It’s not exactly somewhere you’d choose to live, is it?”
“Molly, I’d live in a cardboard box under a bridge if it meant I got to be with you. If our time apart has taught me anything, it’s to appreciate what really matters. A big fancy house and all the material things don’t mean anything when you don’t get to share them with someone you love. And by the same token, a house that you wouldn’t choose for yourself can be a happy home, filled with laughter if you share it with the right person.”
She smiled and went through to the kitchen. “Do you want a glass of prosecco? I managed to find the same one we had at the cabin.”
“I’d love one, thanks.”
Instead of bringing their drinks through to the living room, she beckoned for him to follow her out through the dining room and onto the back patio. He loved it out here. There was a little stone pond with a miniature waterfall surrounded by pavers. There were containers of plants overflowing with flowers and a very neat herb garden. Off to one side was a pergola, shading a table and chairs. “Damn. I don’t remember it being like this out here.”
She smiled. “That’s because it wasn’t like this. This is my labor of love. I’ve built my little sanctuary for my time off. I come out here and read and listen to the water, and tinker with my plants.”
“It’s beautiful. And if I know you, you did it all yourself.”
She nodded happily. “You know me. I can’t just sit around when I’m not working. It took me months—and those pavers are damned heavy, but yes, this is all my own work. Oh, except for the pergola. That was a gammy job.”
He raised an eyebrow, not understanding. “Gammy? What does that mean? That it was no fun?”
She laughed. “Sorry, it’s an acronym. I pride myself on being able to do most things all by myself, but I’m not silly about it. I know some things are beyond me. Those jobs are designated as GAMI jobs. It stands for Get A Man In.”
Marcos shook his head. He admired her—both the way she could fend for herself and her ability to admit that she couldn’t handle everything alone. He didn’t like the idea of her having to get a man in, though. It was unreasonable of him, and he knew it, but he resented any man coming in to help her out—any man that wasn’t him. “I’d like to volunteer myself for any new GAMI jobs that come in.”
She smiled. “Thank you. I’d like that.”
He nodded. “Me too. And the acronym still works. Now instead of just any old man, you can Get A Marcos In.”
She laughed. “Perfect!”
Chapter Ten
Molly woke late the next morning. Marcos had well and truly worn her out last night, or to be fair, they’d worn each other out. She rolled over to look at him, but he wasn’t there. She sat up in bed, her heart racing and then took a deep breath to calm herself. Panic was an unreasonable reaction to the fact that the man had gotten up before she did.
She went out into the living room and smiled at the sight of him in his boxers at the stove, cooking—bacon, and it smelled wonderful.
He turned and smiled at her. “I hope you’re hungry. I was starving, so I raided the fridge.”
“I’m starving, too. What do you want me to do?”
“Pull up a seat and keep me company while I cook. I’ll get you a coffee.”
She stood there staring at him for a moment. This wasn’t the Marcos she remembered. He should be handing the spatula over, relieved that she was up and could take over.
He placed a mug of coffee on the counter in front of her and pulled out a seat at the island. “There you go. How do you like your bacon?”
“Not crispy.”
He raised an eyebrow at her. “Is this okay? Do you mind me taking over your kitchen?”
She shook her head. “I don’t mind, I’m just a little surprised. And, to be honest, if this is an act to make a good impression, I’d rather you didn’t bother. We need to be who we are to find out if we’re still good together.”
He came to her and touched her cheek. “I promise. I will be honest with you about everything—in what I say and what I do. This isn’t ass kissing. This is me enjoying myself and wanting to share it with you. During the years I was back in Sicily, I spent a lot of time at my parents’ house because I didn’t enjoy being at my house. When my mom figured out how useless I was at anything domestic, she taught me to how to cook. Actually, I should say she taught me to love cooking.”
“Wow! I would never have imagined you loving to cook.”
He shrugged and went back to check on the bacon. “It helped me build a connection with my mom again, and it made me feel close to you.”
Molly’s heart melted. “It did?”
He nodded. “I know it sounds soft, but you always loved to cook. You were so good at it, and you enjoyed it so much. When I figured out what I was doing, I found I enjoyed it too. It felt like I knew you a little bit better, understood you a little bit more.” He shrugged again.
She went to him and wrapped her arms around his waist. “That makes me happy. I love that you were thinking about me even then.”
He landed a kiss in the middle of her forehead. “I never stopped thinking about you.”
After they’d eaten, they both showered and got ready to go for a hike in the hills.
“It’s been a long time since I’ve been out on the trails,” said Molly.
“Not as long as it’s been for me. And, if we find we’re too out of shape, we can come back or go into town and get some lunch.”
They weren’t out of shape at all. They walked for a couple of hours, and Molly loved every minute of it. He was such good company—better even than she remembered. It was as if all his sharp edges had been rounded off.
“What are you s
miling about?” he asked when they reached the top of a rise and stopped to admire the view.
“You. I was thinking that I like you even more now than I did back then.”
He put his arm around her shoulders. “That makes me happy. I’ve changed.”
“I know you told me that, but now I’m getting to see it. This is what I meant. Conversations aren’t everything. We need to live the moments together before any of it will be real for me.”
“I know. As you can imagine, a part of me is impatient. I want us to be together right now, get married, start a family and get on with the life we should always have had.”
Molly bit her bottom lip. He wanted to start a family?
“I know I have to wait, to go at your pace. And I’m enjoying this, too. I’m getting to know who you are now, and I like you even more. I love you more than I did then. I loved you with all my heart, but my heart is bigger and stronger—as well as softer—now. It has more understanding and more room for love.”
She smiled. “You say such lovely things.”
“But I know you need more than words.”
She nodded. “I have to ask about one thing you just said.”
“What?”
“About starting a family.”
He nodded slowly. “I know it’s too soon to talk about that, but it’s what I’d like. And you gave me hope when you talked about adopting. Is that something you’d consider?” His eyes were full of concern, and he took hold of her hand. “I suppose the question I need to ask is one I haven’t wanted to.”
“What’s that?”
“Can you even consider a future with me? Would you want to spend your life with a man who can’t father a child?”
She squeezed his hand. “Of course. You’re the only man I’ve ever considered spending my life with. Would I like to have children? Yes. Not immediately, but someday. To be honest, I wasn’t sure I’d ever get married, let alone have children. When we get to the point where we want a family, I’d love to adopt. I don’t think blood is what defines a family. It’s love.”