by J. K. Rock
I had a long, difficult relationship with Hannah, but I could have kissed her then for speaking my mind so perfectly. God, I envied that ability.
“Is that so?” Brooke tossed the candy and lip gloss on her bed and stomped Hannah’s way. “Maybe I should get a nerd herd like you.”
Hannah leapt from her bed and glared at Brooke. Rachel, Brittany, and I met each other’s eyes, our expressions basically one version or another of “oh it’s on now.” Nia tossed a silver, leopard-print bikini in Brooke’s underwear drawer and fled.
For a minute, no one breathed as we waited for the volcano formerly known as Hannah to erupt, but a minute passed and then another before she sat back down again. She pulled an oversized jar of taffy from beneath her bed, swirled her hand around for a sour apple one, then casually unwrapped it.
Since Victoria was reading on the porch, there was little chance of getting caught with the outlawed treats…or a fight being stopped.
“Compliments of my nerd herd.” Hannah raised the treat like she was toasting a bride, popped it in her mouth, and chewed. The scent was so strong we could smell it—sweet, tart, and apple-crisp. “Anyone want one? Anyone but Brooke?”
Brittany and Rachel looked at a scowling Brooke, then shook their heads.
“Kayla?” Hannah held the jar out to me. “Plenty to share.”
My mouth watered, and for an instant, I imagined eating one. But taking the treat would mean siding with Hannah and I couldn’t do that. Not if I wanted to keep the rest of my friends. “No, thanks.”
“Suit yourselves.” Disappointment clouded Hannah’s face before she lay back down and tossed a green wrapper over her shoulder.
I blew out a breath. Crisis averted.
Brooke stormed to her bunk. “Whatever.” She uncapped the lip glosses one by one, then threw them aside. “And these all suck.”
“Cameron got your false eyelashes.” I held out the package, and Brooke’s face transformed from pouty princess to YouTube star.
“Thank you, Kayla.” She pulled out a pair and examined them closely before giving me a slow smile. “It’s nice to know I have some true friends.”
I nearly choked on that one, and Rachel had to pound my back. A true friend? Ha! I hadn’t even “liked” her video. And I definitely hated that she’d possibly made out with Nick.
I held up a hand, eyes watering, and hustled out on the porch. My lungs pulled in the pine-scented air. It always cleared my mind and washed away my hurts. Brooke was harmless. I shouldn’t be jealous about her going after Nick. I’d rejected him. Plus, no one knew that I’d liked him. Even Nick hadn’t known that since I’d stopped that near kiss we’d shared three years ago.
I rolled my shoulders and stretched my arms overhead like I did before a swim meet. Tomorrow I’d get up early and do some yoga. The relaxing moves would help my tangled emotions. I gave Victoria a wave she didn’t notice, then finger-combed my messy hair back into a high ponytail with the help of a friendshipbracelet-turned-scrunchy. My hands froze when I spotted a scrap of paper thumb-tacked to the bottom railing between the main post and the first rail.
I stepped closer.
Impossible.
My pulse quickened. It was like the notes Nick and I used to exchange. Had he left this note for Brooke?
My heart squeezed at the thought. Jealousy had me snatching the note free and, after an over-the-shoulder glance at an oblivious Victoria, scrambling down the steps. I sat against the birch tree beside our cabin, its peeling bark scratching through my tank top.
My fingers trembled as I unfolded the note. If it was for Brooke, then I’d tack it back in place and tell her where to find it, as much as that would hurt. But what if it wasn’t for Brooke…? My eyes flew across the writing on the paper square.
How’s your cut?
My hand rose to the faint line across my cheek. It’d mostly healed since our lakeside chicken fight. Was the note about that? And if so, then it had to be for me. From Nick. Although a lot had changed, his right-slanted handwriting hadn’t.
A roar filled my ears.
Nick wrote me a note. Like old times. Like when we used to be friends. Only now we weren’t.
I reread his question, then scanned it again, looking for some deeper meaning, some clue to the puzzle that me and Nick had turned into. Was he just checking in? Feeling guilty about the injury his new “girlfriend” caused? Or was there more?
No way could I solve this mystery on my own. I needed answers, but I didn’t dare ask Nick. What if he was playing some kind of game? Trying to make me think we were cool again when we obviously weren’t. There was only one thing to do, and I raced back to the cabin to do it.
Minutes later I tiptoed alongside Warriors’ Warden. Hopefully they hadn’t skipped their mid-afternoon run with Rob. All seemed quiet until another step sent a frog leaping from the shadows. I clapped a hand over my mouth to smother my scream. Yuck. So gross.
Flattened against the cabin, I inched closer to the porch. No boy sounds spilled from the building—no wrestling grunts, obnoxious burps or hurled insults that slid off their skin like Teflon. No. All was clear. I just needed the courage to leave my note for Nick.
I looked down at the paper and the answer I’d agonized over before finally writing my poetic response: Fine.
Oh. God. It sucked. I sucked. This sucked. What was I doing? Nick was into Brooke. He’d taken her hiking and spent all of his time with her. Yet he’d left me a note. Maybe he felt guilty about the cut his partner gave me? It was probably just a practical question and not romantic at all. So why was I obsessing? I should just throw it away before I turned into that girl—the pathetic kind who read way too much into things. If I walked away now, I could pretend this hadn’t happened.
Only I couldn’t.
The thumbtack pricked my clenched palm. If there was a sign saying “Kayla—don’t!” this was it. But my feet carried me to the space between the spindle and the large newel post anyway. I stared at it for a moment, then swooped down and plunged the tack into my paper. It fluttered in the small breeze coming off the lake, but otherwise, it was fixed to the wood for all to see—or, at least, for someone who was looking for it.
Sweat beaded my forehead. Nick would think I wanted him back, that I was after him like all the other girls. This was a huge mistake. I never should have come. I turned to take it back but froze at a familiar, nasal voice.
“Kayla! We’ve been looking everywhere for you. Why did you run out like that? We’re making friendship bracelets and headbands for my video, and you’re the best at it.”
I stepped in front of the paper and put my hands behind me. If only my arms were long enough to reach down and get back the note. Why were they here near the boys’ cabins?
“Hey, guys.”
“We have to hurry or we’ll be late. The Warrior guys are meeting us at arts and crafts to work on some set pieces for the background.” Rachel pulled her heel up to her back and stood on one leg, released it, and did the same with the other foot. “And why are you hanging around Cameron’s cabin? Thought you weren’t into him anymore.”
“I-uh-um…” Darn. Why did my brain always quit when I needed it most?
Brittany shoulder-bumped me as we headed along the pine-laden path to the arts and crafts building. “Someone’s got a crush,” she sang.
Brooke twirled in the spotlight of a bright sun patch. “Hey that would make a great song title.” She threw back her head and shouted to the sky. “Nia!”
Instantly, her “fan club” popped out from a nearby pine tree, stifling a yawn. The poor girl was probably trying to catch a few Zs in the five-second intervals when Brooke didn’t need her.
“Yes, Miss White?” She withdrew a small floral clipboard from a little knapsack she carried on her back.
I wondered if she earned bonus fan club points for taking this trip with Brooke. What incentives could she have been given to make this hellish camp experience okay for her?
“W
rite down ‘Someone’s Got a Crush’ and let’s meet in the cabin after dinner for lyrics.” Brooke flicked her purple-tipped ends over her shoulder. “And you’re excused. I hope you told the kitchen about my updated diet requirements?”
Nia checked her list. “I’m on my way there right now.”
“Great. Don’t worry if you don’t catch up with us for activities today. I’ll let Victoria know you were doing errands for me.”
“Yes, Miss White. And may I say that you look great today.” Nia smiled so big and bright that I half-wondered if she meant it—or if those bared teeth were the sign of a teenager on the edge.
If Brooke noticed anything unusual, she didn’t say so.
“Never state the obvious, Nia.” Brooke smoothed her khaki mini-skirt and adjusted the low-riding belt that cinched in her off-the-shoulder gauzy white shirt. “Except in my case, of course.”
Nia turned and hurried down the path toward the dining hall. How could the girl be so duped by Brooke? Then again, so were Nick, Rachel, and Brittany. Maybe Hannah and I had Brooke all wrong.
“Now let’s get back to Kayla and Cameron, the remix.” Brooke pointed her designer shades at me before putting them on. They nearly slid off her perfect ski slope of a nose.
“No time!”
I hurried ahead of the group, eyes on my butterfly-embellished sandals. Once we reached the arts and crafts building, they’d get distracted and I’d turn invisible again.
“Oh, so now you’re worried about being late?” Rachel caught up to me in a couple of long strides. She hooked an arm through mine and slowed my retreat. “Where’s the fire?”
“Maybe the heat’s with Cameron.” Brittany skipped past us and made a sizzling sound.
“What does that even mean?” Rachel’s eyes slid my way.
Brittany’s long blonde braids swung as she turned. “Duh. It’s not my job to help you guys get a sense of humor. Sheesh.”
Rachel tapped her forehead. “Of course. Brittany humor…I should have translated…”
Everyone cracked up, though we had no good reason. Maybe it was the warm afternoon sun, the stupid kind of fun you could only have with friends (or sorta friends), or the aroma of glue wafting from the nearing arts and crafts building. Either way, I was a few yards from avoiding their interrogation. I would never complain about lanyard-making again. Out loud.
I stumbled against Brooke when she stopped in front of the door and wrapped her fingers around the handle.
“So what gives? Are you and Cameron a thing again?”
“Hey—did I just hear my name?” spoke a male voice behind us.
I turned and looked up to meet Cameron’s eyes, his teeth appearing in a cocky grin. He shook back his long, toffee-colored bangs. Crap. Where had he come from?
I tried to brush by Brooke, but she blocked my way.
“Oh, look—paparazzi!” I hollered, but she just gave me a knowing look and stayed put.
“What is up with you, Kayla?” Brooke raised her voice as the other Warriors arrived. “Are you embarrassed that we caught you hanging around Cameron’s cabin, waiting for your man?”
“He’s not my man.” I sidestepped Cameron’s arm. My eyes met Nick’s, their gold flecks flashing in the sun. Was he thinking about the note? His intense expression gave nothing away.
“Oh, come on, babe. Don’t be shy now.” Cameron planted a wet kiss on my ear. “So you were waiting for some Cam action. Big deal.”
“Can we please go inside now?” I put my hand over Brooke’s and pulled the door open, beyond caring. Between Nick’s unreadable stare and Cameron’s groping, I wanted out.
And so did Nick it seemed.
He called, “Forgot something,” over his shoulder and took off down the path to the boys’ cabins. My lungs collapsed on themselves. Would he find the note? Oh, God. I needed to get it before he saw it. But how?
I trailed behind the girls and the Warriors, keeping Rachel between me and Cameron. We gathered different-colored strings, patterned beads, and scissors and found a table at the far end of the long room where the activity director, Mrs. Sutton, sat. A large fan whirred in the tall window, doing little to erase the smell of hot glue and paint.
“I can’t believe Nick just bailed.” Brittany folded a blue string over a purple one before twining them through a silver strand. “Someone pass me a sky-blue bead.”
I slid on the bead with tiny painted clouds and resumed my own braiding. It was weird that Nick would ditch Brooke. Maybe he went to write her a note. A romantic one.
“I’m not feeling those colors for my video, Kayla.” Brooke’s strong perfume was like a punch in the nose.
I looked down at the rainbow of colors I’d connected in a complicated zigzag pattern. “Oh. I thought you said your theme was ‘bright.’”
“Not as in color. Everyone knows metallics are in this year. Duh.”
She moved along to hassle the next person in line. My fingers flew as I seethed. How did Nick put up with her? And why didn’t anyone but Hannah stand up to this selfish, bossy chick? There was Diva-ish and then there was just…mean.
Fifteen minutes later, I had a small pile of bracelets in varying widths, patterns and metallic combinations. I laced my aching fingers together and stretched. Even my fingernails felt numb. Definitely time for a mini-break.
I glanced over at a group of young campers gathered around a counselor who folded small bits of paper into origami animals. I smiled, remembering the origami rose Nick had once given me.
Then I remembered.
Nick!
He still hadn’t returned, and every minute away increased the chances that he’d find my dumb note.
“Mrs. Sutton, I’m going to run to the bathroom.” I grabbed my little leather purse.
“Of course, my dear, but hurry. I wouldn’t want you to miss the fun. These accessories will be seen by millions on the Internet.” She grabbed Brooke’s hands. “Thank you for putting my artistry on an international stage.”
“You’re welcome…” I heard Brooke mutter before I raced outside and down a side trail that would bring me behind Nick’s cabin. The detour was longer, but better, since I wouldn’t run directly into Nick.
At the Warriors’ Warden, I snuck a peek inside an open rear window and saw the empty horror of a boys’ cabin. Wrinkled clothes, trail mix, and broken game pieces littered the floor. The walls were covered in pictures of bikini-clad girls and a couple of sweat socks that defied gravity and stuck to the wood. A pile of nearby athletic gear made me cover my nose and gag right through the screen. Beneath the pile, something moved. I swear.
My heel caught on a rock when I stumbled back. I went down, hard.
“Kayla?”
I closed my eyes at that familiar voice.
“You know that trick doesn’t actually make you disappear,” drawled Nick, his tone full of humor instead of sarcasm.
I smiled. Our old joke.
“How do you know I’m not a figment of your imagination?” I opened my eyes and caught Nick’s longing expression before he dropped his gaze. As for me, I couldn’t stop staring. He was so gorgeous. His olive skin had darkened to bronze this week at camp, and his dark brown hair now had strands of gold that matched the flecks in his green/hazel eyes. “Because my dreams are never that good,” he said, his voice as soft as a sigh.
“What?” Had I heard him right?
“Forget it.” When he pulled me up, the feel of his palm against mine sent ripples of awareness through me. My face grew hot. It probably looked as red as the kayak paddles leaning against the porch. Could I be more obvious?
We stood there for an awkward moment, our hands clasped, before he seemed to give himself a shake and slowly let go.
“Is Cameron with you?” A grittiness entered Nick’s voice.
“No. I…I—think I forgot something here.”
“You want some help looking for it?” His face relaxed again into its handsome lines. He shoved his hands in his pockets, hi
s blue T-shirt molding to his lean stomach.
I backed away. “No. I’m good. You should get back to Brooke.”
A hurt look crossed his face too quickly for me to be sure I’d seen it. Nick looked away, then shrugged. “Oh. Okay. Yeah. You’re right.”
“Yeah.” I gave myself a mental kick. I was throwing Nick at Brooke when he’d offered to hang out with me. Idiot. “But I’ll see you later, okay?”
“Sure. Whatever.” Nick turned to go, then abruptly swerved back. “Hey.”
“Yeah?” My heart beat faster.
He stared at me for a long moment, and I remembered when we’d confided everything in each other. When nothing was off limits.
Slowly, he lifted his fingers to touch my face, and I melted. Just melted. My eyelids fluttered. I recalled what being this close to him felt like. I’d relived it enough times in my dreams…
“Your cut is healing okay.” Nick’s voice was dark and serious. Not one bit romantic.
“Oh.” I cranked my eyelids all the way open and tried to shake off my stupidity. He was touching my cheek, for crying out loud. “It’s nothing.”
I stepped away from him, out of his reach, embarrassed at how easily I could fall back into crushing on him. When would I get it through my head that he didn’t want anything to do with me? That I was seeing things that weren’t there?
“Okay. Just…see you around.” He clenched the hand that touched me. Regretting it, I’m sure.
As he walked away, I watched his retreating back and the way his wide shoulders moved with an easy, athletic grace. He’d always been cute in a boyish way. Now he was grown-up and totally hot. Yet there was no point in noticing him like that. He’d moved on and so should I.
I trudged to the front of the cabin to grab the note. Since he hadn’t mentioned it, he must have missed it. Relief and a little disappointment warred with each other.
But when I checked the rail, my note was gone.
My pulse raced faster than my feet as I sprinted back to my cabin. If Nick took my note, he might be thinking anything right now, including that I still liked him. He must have taken the note so his cabin mates wouldn’t discover it. No way was I going back to make friendship bracelets and face him. I’d rather go to the nurse. But first I needed to grab a book. There was nothing worse than listening to Nurse Hammel’s gross-out injury and sickness stories. No thanks.