‘Feeling better?’
She looked up into his eyes. ‘I wasn’t feeling—bad.’
‘Just a little constrained?’ he suggested.
‘Well—’ she bit her lip ‘—a little overwhelmed perhaps. But not sorry or anything like that,’ she said hastily. ‘Don’t for one minute think that.’
He undid the buttons of the shirt and slid his hand beneath it. She trembled then quietened as his fingers roamed over her skin, circling her breasts then stroking her back and the swell of her hips.
Until finally she said, in a grave, deep little voice, ‘That’s so nice, Mike.’
‘It is for me too. In fact making love to you, Sid, is one of the nicest things I’ve ever done.’
‘I didn’t think—’ she stopped then made herself go on ‘—that I had the kind of body men would appreciate.’
‘I gathered that but men can be quite discerning, you know. They can appreciate high, tender little breasts, skin like alabaster, lips like the palest pink coral and hips that are jaunty and as rounded as two perfect peaches.’ He moved his hand below the elastic of her panties.
Although she blushed, she laughed quietly too. ‘You’re waxing lyrical, Mr Brennan. I don’t know whether I ought to believe you.’
‘Believe me, Sid. You’re delicately, tantalisingly and fascinatingly fashioned.’
‘So are you.’ She grimaced wryly. ‘I mean to say, I love the way you’re put together—which is strong and rugged and seems to be like a haven to me, that is. I’m sorry I can’t be more specific—oh, dear, I’m getting into a tangle, aren’t I?’ she said awkwardly.
‘Is this kind of constraint, as you put it, normal?’ she asked directly then. ‘I was so sure I wouldn’t have to be coy or anything like that.’
‘Perfectly. And very appropriate for a girl who was a virgin less than twenty-four hours ago. Nor are you being coy; I don’t think you could anyway.’ He paused and she looked up at him, not sure whether he was teasing her, but his eyes as their gazes locked were serious. ‘Men are a bit different, though, Sid. Once they embark on this, it’s very hard to be constrained. Which means to say—’ his eyes danced suddenly a bit, she thought ‘—that I’m now fascinated by every part of you, that I’m likely to be stricken with desire for you at the oddest times and, well, that’s the nature of the beast unfortunately. I hope you’ll not mind excessively and even see your way clear to take pity on me from time to time.’
He was to demonstrate this to her a day or so later…
‘Is that a fact?’ he said gravely to her one afternoon when she’d been discoursing knowledgeably on the subject of motorbikes-Eglis, Ducatis and the like. ‘I can’t imagine you all dressed up in black leather.’
‘Oh, I don’t think I’d like to drive them!’
‘Just tune them? I’m relieved to hear you say so,’ he murmured. They were sitting on the back deck, he was actually lounging on it, his head propped in his hand, and she was sitting cross-legged eating an orange, wearing shorts and her blue and white spotted blouse. ‘As a matter of fact I can imagine you wearing—not much at all, however.’
Sidonie looked up from the last segment of her orange and discovered that he was watching her in a curiously heavy-lidded way.
‘Mike,’ she said with a tremor in her voice, ‘do you mean now?’
A wicked little glint of amusement lit his eyes. ‘I’m afraid so—I did warn you that this was liable to happen although of course I apologise for the inconvenience.’
She had to smile but then frowned. ‘Is…is there something about me eating an orange…?’ She found herself unable to go on.
‘Definitely,’ he agreed. ‘Particularly when it’s laced with hearing you talk about a 1000cc V twin Egli Vincent capable of doing a hundred and forty miles an hour—the mixture seems to be irresistibly seductive.’
Sidonie raised an eyebrow. ‘Are you sure you’re not simply thinking of a way to make me stop talking?’
He laughed. ‘You can talk all you like so long as you take me to bed quite soon as well.’
But she was curiously lost for words when he laid her on his bed and took her clothes off item by item as if he was truly fascinated by her small, slim body.
Dear diary…I had no idea it would be the way it was. That he could be so sweet and funny—and even patient, I suspect, while I adjusted to it. Which took a bit of adjusting, I have to tell you, not so much him making love to me but the way everything was different, the way he was fascinated by every part of me, or seemed to be, the way everything we did from then on was…coloured by our sleeping together. And when I got more used to it, to him touching me, holding me, saying things to me when we were far removed from being in bed, it started to come more naturally to me too—I probably was terrifically clumsy at it at first but he never seemed to mind. As a matter of fact I got the impression he liked it but I might have been wrong. Then there was the way he made love to me…
‘Mike?’ she said a few days later.
‘Sidonie?’
‘Mike,’ her voice shook, ‘something incredible seems to be happening to me.’
‘Tell me,’ he said very quietly, holding her while his body moved on hers.
‘It’s like—it’s like nothing else that has ever happened to me. It’s like waves flowing up through me that are so nice but although I’ve had a sort of presentiment before…of them, this time…Oh——’ She closed her eyes and arched her body against him. ‘Oh, Mike, don’t let me go…’ she pleaded.
‘It’s happening to me too, Sid,’ he said very quietly and reassuringly but his arms tightened about her and their bodies moved together until they reached a final crescendo.
A long time later when he still held her closely in his arms and was smoothing the damp tangle of her hair and watching her exhausted but radiant face she whispered, ‘I did it!’
‘And beautifully.’
‘I was beginning to wonder—’
He put a finger to her lips. ‘I told you it was only a matter of time.’
‘Well, yes, I know but one can’t help worrying, I mean, one reads things and—wonders, you see.’
He smiled wryly down at her. ‘What one should really do is take the advice of one’s elders.’
She smiled back at him, her eyes alight with love and a little impish glint. ‘I know but I have this enquiring mind. It’s a great cross to bear sometimes. But I’ll tell you what it tells me, and I’d be surprised if I were wrong in this. It tells me,’ she said and slid her arms around his shoulders, ‘that what you do to me beforehand is the secret to it all.’
‘Not entirely,’ he said gravely.
‘Not?’ She opened her eyes at him.
‘Well, in the sense that you have to like what I do to you in the first place.’
She sighed and laughed. ‘Who wouldn’t‘.?’ Then she sobered. ‘I have to thank you——’
‘No, please—’
‘Yes, I do and I’m quite determined so you might as well listen, Mike Brennan. Because you see, when I made the decision to do this, I was extremely ignorant of a lot of aspects of it, and I’m sure that showed—I mean, all I really knew was…that it seemed right to do it, and that I loved being in your arms and it didn’t frighten me at all…what might come, so to speak.’
His lips twisted. ‘Do you think I didn’t know that, Sid?’
‘Oh.’ She looked momentarily downcast but recovered. ‘But did you know that once it was done I felt a little bit inadequate? As well as shy and verbally clumsy and a few other things,’ she said ruefully.
She felt him jolt with laughter but he said gently, ‘I’m afraid to say I did, Sid. I tried to tell you it was perfectly normal, especially for someone like you.’
‘So you did, but what really helped was the way you made me feel—as if you really wanted me—’
‘I did and I do.’
‘Anyway—oh——’ she looked into his eyes ‘—I think I’ll just say thanks. I always did talk too much
.’ And she buried her face in his shoulder suddenly. ‘This, today, and all the other days, is the nicest thing that’s ever happened to me,’ she continued in a gruff, muffled little voice, however. ‘I just wanted you to know in case my…constraint seemed like something else. And, whatever happens, nothing can change it.’
He was silent for a long time then he tilted her face and kissed her. But there was a spark of something oddly sombre in his eyes.
During all this the weather remained unsettled so they were forced to spend an extended stay at the Percy Islands but finally the day dawned when they felt the sunshine might not be a false alarm and they set sail for Island Head Creek on the mainland.
‘What’s there?’ Sidonie asked excitedly, intoxicated by the breeze in the sails and the shush of their bow wave.
Mike grimaced. ‘Nothing.’
‘Nothing?’
‘Well, other than the army.’
Her eyes widened. ‘What do you mean?’
He laughed at her expression. ‘The whole Shoalwater Bay area is an army training reserve which is not conducive to it being a residential area, apart from the fact that it’s miles away from anywhere, anyway.’
‘Do you mean it’s a sort of firing range?’
‘From time to time.’
‘Why are we going there, Mike?’
‘They let you know well in advance if you shouldn’t be there; we’ll be quite safe.’ He took her hand. ‘There are two great natural harbours on this part of the coast—Island Head Creek and Pancake Creek, which is south of Gladstone. They’re both virtually uninhabited and they abound with fish, crabs and oysters as well as having a sort of wild beauty of their own. I think you’ll like Island Head.’
It was to occur to Sidonie that she would like the far side of the moon, if they were there together.
They spent two days at Island Head Creek, which despite it being called a creek was a large body of sheltered water fringed with white beaches or, in some spots, bush-clad, rocky ridges. They were unable to explore the ridges because of the dangers of unexploded shells, but it was off a lovely beach that her swimming lessons commenced…
‘Mike, I might not be the kind of person who takes naturally to swimming—’
‘Nonsense—no one takes naturally to it anyway. Just do as you’re told, Sid, and stop talking otherwise you’ll get a mouthful of water.’
‘But…’ She sank and came up spluttering.
‘I told you,’ he said with a grin.
‘Mike, I can’t even stand here,’ she protested and clung to him like a wet monkey. She was also wearing her red bikini—a mistake, she conceded to herself, since it seemed not to have lost its association with another watery, traumatic occasion.
‘Ah, but I can,’ he said, ‘and do you honestly think I would stand by and let you drown, Sid?’
‘No,’ she said, but crossly, ‘just let me make a fool of myself and swallow half of Island Head Creek!’
‘Not if you do as you’re told,’ he repeated patiently.
She made a disgusted sound then took a deep breath but stopped halfway through. ‘You’re determined to do this, aren’t you, Mike?’
‘I am,’ he replied placidly.
‘You really don’t have to worry about me falling into a pond and drowning,’ she said bitterly.
‘No, I won’t, because by the time you’ve calmed down and let me show you a few things you’ll be well on your way to swimming.’
‘Don’t count on it,’ she warned darkly but he unwound her arms, kissed her wet cheek and placed her on her back in the water with his hand underneath her waist.
‘I think I can do it,’ an amazed Sidonie was heard to say some time later.
‘Told you so,’ her mentor said brazenly and scooped her up in his arms. ‘What you can do now is float. Tomorrow I’ll show you how to breathe.’
It was not long afterwards when they were back aboard Morning Mist that he removed her wet bikini, dried her fresh body and placed her naked on the bed, saying casually, ‘Still cross with me, Miss Hill?’
Sidonie considered, refusing to allow the smile that wanted to curve her lips to surface. ‘You’re a very dictatorial, even hard person sometimes, Mike,’ she said neutrally.
‘So I’ve been told.’ He stripped off his own togs, lay down beside her and started to stroke her body until her nipples unfurled and she began to tremble with desire.
She sighed and moved into his arms. ‘It’s also hard to stay cross with you when you do that, not that I was, really.’
‘Good—’
‘Mike—’ she sat up suddenly ‘—can I ask you something?’
He grimaced and folded his arms behind his head. ‘Fire away.’
‘I didn’t——’ she hesitated ‘—I had the impression that…what happened between men and women would be a lot more dramatic than it really is.’
His eyes danced with sudden devilry. ‘Would you like us to be dramatic, Sid? I take it you mean something like me dragging you by the hair off to my cave—that sort of thing?’ There was a teasing query in his eyes now.
‘Oh, no.’ She shivered. ‘I don’t think I’d like that at all.’ She paused and looked thoughtful.
‘So what did you mean?’
‘I’m not really sure,’ she said slowly. ‘But you often read about it as being full of deep, dark, brooding passion and—things like that. Getting carried away on a blaze of sensuality, against your will kind of thing. Looking into some man’s dark eyes across a room and being set on fire———’
‘Do you mean—’ he touched one of her pale pink velvety nipples ‘—that I don’t set you on fire, Sid?’
She trembled. ‘No—yes, you do,’ she said with an effort.
‘I wonder.’ He looked up at her with a faintly narrowed look.
‘What do you mean?’ she asked after a moment.
‘Nothing-——’
‘No, you can tell me,’ she said earnestly. ‘Because I’ll be perfectly honest and say that I sometimes wonder whether for you I’m a bit like fish and chips as opposed to—’ she gestured ‘—Dover sole. I mean to say,’ she added, ‘fish and chips are nice and…homely, I guess, but Dover sole is—special.’
For a moment his expression was entirely quizzical. Then he said, ‘For me, you are special, so banish the thought of fish and chips from your mind—and do you intend to talk to me and tantalise me at the same time for much longer?’ He brought his hands down and put them about her waist. ‘Because if so, my lovely water sprite, I will have a problem.’ And he moved his hands up to cup her breasts.
‘Mike, I can’t think when you do that,’ she murmured.
‘I know,’ he said softly and drew her down so he could tease her nipples with his tongue. ‘Better still, you can’t talk.’
‘No,’ she conceded a little helplessly. ‘Well, not nearly as effectively as if I were otherwise engaged. In fact you’ve quite managed to distract my thoughts.’
‘Good,’ he murmured and continued paying exquisite attention to her breasts until she was finally struck speechless. Then he laid her on her back and slid his hand between her thighs and caressed the most intimate part of her with a touch so gentle she barely felt it, yet it caused that lovely tide to start to rise in her body and she said his name and opened her arms to him.
‘Sweet Sid,’ he said barely audibly, as he lowered his weight on to her and entered her warm, arching body, ‘believe me, this is pure Dover sole.’
But she found herself wondering later whether that was true, or whether he’d subtly deflected her. And she also found herself wondering what he’d meant when he’d said that he wondered if he set her on fire.
How can he doubt it‘? she asked herself, and jumped as she felt his hand on her knee.
She was sitting cross-legged with her chin in her hands at the top of the ladder that led down to the cabin, watching the sun set and thinking all these serious thoughts; he was standing, she discovered, on the bottom rung so that h
is head was level with her waist, and he could have been there for ages, so engrossed had she been.
‘You’re lost in thought, Sid. Want to tell me?’
She put her hands on his shoulders and smiled faintly. ‘No.’
‘Now you’ve really got me worried—have I done something wrong?’
She looked into his eyes, observed the wicked little glint, and strove for a light note. ‘I feel it in me at this moment in time to—preserve a mysterious silence.’ She slid her fingers through his hair and added, ‘I sometimes miss your red bandanna, Mike.’
He grimaced. ‘Why?’
‘I don’t know. Perhaps it was a symbol that you were more in my league.’ She stopped and bit her lip.
If he observed it he didn’t comment but pointed out to her that she’d thoroughly mistrusted both him and his red bandanna at one stage.
She had to laugh. ‘Well…’
‘Admit it, Sid. You even alerted the local police, after all.’
‘So I did—well, it didn’t actually happen quite like that,’ she protested, then shrugged delicately. ‘And now look what’s happened to me. They’d all be so amazed. I doubt if I would have the courage to ever set foot in Airlie Beach again.’
He said gently, ‘If they could see you now they’d think you were a sight for sore eyes. You’ve blossomed into something warm, golden and lovely.’
Sidonie looked down into his blue eyes and was possessed of a flood of feeling that shook her to the core. She’d been through the stages of liking Mike, of loving him in an almost abstract way, of wanting to see him happy above all and feeling infinitely safe with him. Then she’d discovered the joy of being his lover as he’d initiated her so carefully and patiently, but now she was suddenly possessed of something far deeper and she wondered if this was what being a woman was all about, if she’d finally come to all the knowledge, the joy and the pain that went with the estate. Because, at the same time as she felt an astonishing tenderness for Mike Brennan that was like a physical sensation and caused her breasts to tingle and her insides to melt, she also felt hauntingly sad because one day she was going to have to let him go. And she knew that her body was going to crave him as much as her mind, that she would never be able to separate the effect he had on her again.
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