by Sarah Morgan
‘I thought Phil’s heart was going to stop, along with the patient’s.’ Nikos was captivated by her sweet smile and her frank adoration. She was deliciously uncomplicated.
And she had a fabulous body.
‘Phil is a very cautious person.’
Nikos pulled her into his arms, feeling the immediate response of his body as her softness pressed against him. ‘You need cautious people in this business.’
‘To counter people like you?’ Her eyes teased him. ‘You’re not cautious, are you?’
‘If you’re asking if I know what I want, then the answer is yes.’ Nikos lowered his head and took her mouth, tasting honey and temptation. ‘At the moment what I want is you, in my bed, naked.’
‘My bed.’ She trailed a finger over his rough jaw, her breathing slightly faster than it had been before the kiss. ‘We’ve only ever made love in my bed. It’s been six months and we’ve never once been back to wherever it is you live. Do you realise that?’
Yes, he realised that.
‘Your place is closer.’ Smoothly he steered the conversation away from that particular topic. ‘I’m hungry. What do I have to do to get some of your delicious cheese on toast?’
Her arms slid round his neck. Affection. Warmth. ‘I would have thought you were sick of eating cheese on toast in my room. Are you sure you wouldn’t rather go out to eat?’
‘I want to have sex, then eat, then have sex again,’ Nikos purred, backing her against the wall and feeling the volcanic response of his body. ‘And then have sex again. We’d get arrested for that in a restaurant.’
She was giggling, breathless—her eyes slightly shocked. ‘Nikos, this is ridiculous. We always end up in my single bed in the nurses’ accommodation. We’ve been together for six months. It’s time to stop behaving like hormonal teenagers.’
Nikos brought his mouth down on hers, but his brain refused to be as easily distracted as his body.
Six months?
Surely that wasn’t possible.
‘Nikos?’ She dragged her mouth away from his, laughter and love in her eyes.
Love?
Nikos stilled. When had that happened? And why hadn’t he noticed?
Mentally, he retreated. ‘I like sleeping in your single bed.’ She was getting too close. He curved his hand over her bottom, knowing what had to be done, but finding it surprisingly difficult. Usually, ending a relationship was easy. ‘You have a choice. Either I go for a ten-mile run or I take you to bed. Which is it to be?’
The sexual tension reached almost unbearable proportions.
‘That’s a tricky choice.’ Her breathing was shallow. ‘It isn’t safe to be on the streets of London at this time of night.’
‘Good decision.’ Nikos kissed her again and reached for his jacket. As he urged her out of the door, he pondered on the best way to tell her that the relationship was over.
CHAPTER ONE
‘I STILL can’t believe he’d just dump you, Ella. Why would he do that?’
Ella stared straight at the long slender boat nestling quietly against the bank of the river, appalled by the discovery that her grip on her self-control wasn’t as firm as she would have liked it to be. ‘Obviously he didn’t like me enough.’ And even now, after four long months of no contact, she found it hard to believe that she wasn’t going to see him again—that the connection she’d thought was there hadn’t existed for him.
Helen made a disparaging noise. ‘Ella, you told me he barely let you out of the bedroom for the six months you were together. He liked you.’
‘He liked the sex.’ Ella watched as a kingfisher dived into the water, a flash of iridescent green and blue, searching for breakfast. ‘Men don’t turn every sexual encounter into happy ever after, you know they don’t. Women mate for life, men mate whenever the opportunity presents itself.’
But somehow she’d allowed herself to forget that fact.
She’d romanticised a relationship that had been based on physical chemistry and, worse than that, she’d trusted a man.
‘Change the subject,’ she said flatly. ‘I need to just forget him and move on.’ Which was what he’d done, wasn’t it?
‘How can you forget him? Ella, you’re pregnant! What are you going to do?’
Ella clutched her tiny suitcase and stared at the long, slender canal boat. She’d learned a long time ago that if you focused hard enough, it was possible to hold back tears. So she stared. And gradually the flood levels of emotion subsided. The hot stinging in her throat became a dull ache and the pressure behind her eyes eased. It was OK. She was going to be OK. And so was the baby. She’d make sure of it.
‘I’m going to stop crying over a man who doesn’t deserve it. And while I’m deciding what to do about my life, I’m going to live in this place. I didn’t know it was possible to live on a canal boat. I love it.’
The dark green paintwork gleamed in the sunshine and brightly coloured fresh flowers tumbled from boxes set along the low, flat roof. Ella leaped from the bank to the boat, landing on the polished wooden deck.
‘Why did you pick this? You can’t live in this isolated place.’ Helen glanced nervously up and down the deserted path that ran alongside the sleepy, overgrown canal. ‘You’re a city girl. You like bright lights and people around you.’
‘I want something different. I’m tired of that life.’
‘Well, this is a bit extreme. When you said it was a canal boat, I thought it would be in a marina or something—not just moored in the middle of nowhere. You’re going to have loads of weirdos wandering along here.’
‘I like it.’ Ella watched as a duck glided past, followed by her family of six fluffy ducklings. Her eyes misted. It wasn’t all bad. She was going to have a baby. ‘Aren’t they sweet?’
‘Yeah—if a nutter happens to come stalking you, they’ll be the perfect weapon. You can pick one up and yell, “Duck.”’
‘Very funny. Are you coming aboard?’
‘I don’t know why you can’t carry on living in my spare room.’ Helen followed more cautiously onto the boat. ‘I love having you.’
‘I can’t live with you for ever. I’ll use this as a base while I decide what to do.’ Ella unlocked the doors at the bow of the boat. ‘It’s so peaceful here.’
‘Ella, you’ve been crying yourself to sleep for the past four months. You don’t need peaceful!’
Without responding, Ella ducked down into the long, narrow sitting area. Dark green sofas were piled with contrasting cushions and the polished wooden floor gleamed in the sunlight. She could imagine herself curled up on the cushions in the bow of the boat, a cold drink in her hand.
Alone.
The sudden stab of pain took her by surprise and she dug her nails into her palms.
Alone was fine. Until she’d met Nikos, that had been her life choice.
And she wouldn’t be alone for long, would she? Soon she’d have the baby. They’d be a family…
Helen was looking round doubtfully. ‘Do you realise that we’ve only seen one other person since we arrived? And that was a man on his own, walking a dog. This is not a suitable place for a woman.’
Ignoring her, Ella wandered further down the boat, trying to be positive as she explored her new surroundings. ‘The bedroom is cosy.’ She dumped her suitcase on the floor. ‘I’ll unpack later.’
‘Who did you say owns this place?’
‘One of the consultants at the hospital—he’s gone to Australia for six months with his family. One of the conditions of living here is that I have to water the plants.’
‘Ella, please…’ Helen plopped onto the side of the bed. ‘Just think about what you’re doing.’
‘I’m getting on with my life.’ Ella knelt on the bed next to her and looked out of the window at the overhanging trees that brushed the still surface of the water. ‘It’s so calming here. I can wake up every morning gazing at that.’
‘Crying. Talk to me, Ella. Tell me how you’re feeling.’
Like he’d taken a scalpel to her heart.
‘I’m fine,’ Ella said brightly. ‘No morning sickness, no swollen ankles, no—’
‘I’m not talking about the pregnancy—I’m talking about the way you feel inside. You shut everyone out, Ella. You always have.’ Helen spread her hands in exasperation. ‘Did you do it with him? Didn’t you tell him how you felt?’
‘He knew.’ And that was why he’d ended it. For her, the relationship had been more than the hot sizzle of sexual attraction. He’d wanted shallow and she’d waded in deep. ‘You want to know how I feel? I’ll tell you. I feel as though I’ve been broken into a million tiny pieces. I’ve stuck the pieces back together and so far it’s all holding, but I don’t feel like me any more.’
‘Is that why you’re planning on living in the middle of nowhere?’
‘I need space to work out what I want. And it’s cosy here.’ Ella looked out at the trees spilling over the path and listened to the mellow sound of ducks. ‘I’ll be all right. I’m a paediatric nurse—at least I already know how to pick up a baby and change a nappy.’
‘I’m not worried about your ability to change a nappy.’ Helen swatted a fly. ‘I just don’t want you to be single.’
‘There’s nothing wrong with being single. Single can be a lifestyle choice, you know. We single women earn our own money, we buy our own homes, we—we…’
‘We what? We have sex with ourselves? Hug ourselves when we’re miserable? Fix the car when the engine won’t start? Sounds great.’ Helen recoiled as she noticed a spider lurking in the corner. ‘Sorry, I know it isn’t politically correct to admit it, but I’m not ready to turn into a spinster yet and neither are you. Buried under all that insecurity, you’re an old-fashioned girl. The man made you pregnant. You have to tell him about the baby.’
‘No, I don’t.’ Strengthened by a core of steely determination, Ella lifted her chin. ‘He didn’t want me, Helen.’
And she would do everything she could to protect her baby from the emotional agonies she’d suffered as a child.
‘He didn’t know you were pregnant. And you don’t know why he walked out.’
Oh, yes, she did. Ella closed her eyes. Shut out the images. ‘He had another life. A life he didn’t tell me about.’
‘That bit is bizarre, I agree.’ Helen frowned. ‘I still find it hard to believe that the guy is seriously a billionaire. I’ve never actually met a real live billionaire before.’
‘And to think I used to make him cheese on toast.’ Ella slid off the bed and walked back through to the living area of the boat. ‘Must have been a real letdown after Michelin-starred restaurants. No wonder he left. I was probably giving him indigestion every night.’
Helen followed her. ‘Perhaps not telling you about the money was some sort of romantic test.’
‘Stop endowing him with thoughtful, sensitive qualities.’ Ella tugged open a cupboard and found plates and mugs. ‘Nikos was a selfish, driven, work obsessed male who only wanted one thing.’
‘Well, at least he was jolly good at that one thing.’ Catching Ella’s eye, Helen subsided with a shrug. ‘Sorry—but I just don’t see why the money would make him walk out. It doesn’t make sense. God, this is frustrating. Don’t you want to talk to him?’
‘There’s nothing to talk about. He lied to me and he left. He didn’t even have the courage to tell me face to face—just sent me an email telling me that he was going back to Greece and that our relationship was over.’
Helen winced. ‘I hate email. Did you ever reply?’
‘No. Because that was the day I went to the doctor about being sick. Hard though it is to believe, it hadn’t even occurred to me that I might be pregnant.’ Ella rolled her eyes, embarrassed by her own stupidity. ‘While I was in the waiting room I flicked through a celebrity magazine. And there was a four-page spread on Nikos.’ Heart pounding, she broke off and pressed her fingers to her temples. She still couldn’t actually believe it had happened to her.
Helen slipped her arms around her. ‘I don’t know what to say. I’m really sorry.’
‘So am I,’ Ella said wearily, extracting herself from the hug. ‘But that’s life, isn’t it? I should be grateful that I found out what sort of man Nikos is before the relationship went too far. At least this way it’s only me that gets hurt.’ Better now, before the baby was born.
Funny how protective you could be about a person who hadn’t even arrived in the world yet.
‘But if he turned up, you’d talk to him, right?’
‘He won’t turn up.’
‘How can you be so sure?’
Ella was silent for a moment. ‘Because he’s married.’ Saying the words made her wince. She felt ashamed, even though she knew she had nothing to be ashamed of. Another woman’s man. ‘I suppose that’s why he didn’t want emotional attachment. He already has one. His wife’s name is Ariadne. And she must have the tolerance of a saint to keep taking him back after all the affairs he’s had. All the time he was in London, he had a wife back home in Greece.’
Realising that Helen hadn’t actually responded to her confession, Ella turned and found her friend staring at her in appalled horror.
‘Married?’
‘Yes.’ Ella gave a twisted smile. ‘Don’t look so shocked. I feel bad enough as it is.’
‘How do you know he’s married?’
‘I’ve seen his wedding photos. They were plastered all over that same celebrity magazine that told me he was a billionaire. She’s very pretty. They obviously got married very young.’
‘Why didn’t you tell me this before?’
‘Why do you think? I despised myself for having an affair with a married man. I’m hardly going to boast about it, am I?’
‘I’m your best friend! And I can’t believe you’re only telling me this now. The rat. Oh, Ella…’ Helen sank down onto the sofa and drew in several panicky breaths. ‘I—I wish you’d told me this before. If I’d known…Oh, my God, what have I done?’
‘You haven’t done anything. It’s me who—’ registering Helen’s dramatic reaction, Ella frowned, puzzled. ‘What are you talking about? What have you done?’
There was a long, painful silence while Helen just gazed at her, wide-eyed with guilt and trepidation. ‘You have to understand that I had your best interests at heart…’
‘Now you’re making me nervous.’ Ella felt a sinister tingling in her nerve endings and dread seeped through her veins as she watched her friend’s face turn pale.
‘I didn’t know he was married. I thought the pair of you were just being stubborn and that you could work it out if you’d only get together.’
Ella stared at her, her heart pounding. ‘Helen…’
‘I wrote to him,’ Helen confessed, her eyes glistening with tears. ‘You’re my best friend and I’ve been listening to you crying your heart out every night for four months. I was furious with him and I thought if he knew about the baby…’
‘You told him about the baby?’ Ella felt the colour drain from her cheeks. ‘Helen, no!’
‘I’m so sorry.’ Helen was crying openly now, her hands over her face. ‘It was the wrong thing to do. I see that now. But you can be so stubborn and so can he, and the two of you seemed so in love. I thought that if I could just get you together, you’d be able to sort it out. I thought I was helping—I wanted you to be happy…’
‘What have you done?’ Breathing like someone in the last stages of labour, Ella struggled to think straight. ‘What if he comes? If you told him about the baby…’
‘But perhaps it will be a good thing if he comes. You’ll talk and—’
‘Helen, he’s a married man and as far as I’m concerned that’s the end of it! A man can’t have two families!’ Saying the words was agony. ‘How could you do this? How could you interfere with my life?’ Distraught, Ella’s voice cracked and Helen rubbed the tears from her own face.
‘I didn’t know he was married! You’ll never for
give me, I know, and I wish I could turn the clock back. It’s just that for your whole life you’ve been screwed up about men and I thought I was helping.’
‘I know I’m screwed up about men!’ Ella’s voice was hoarse. ‘I’m completely dysfunctional when it comes to men, I admit it. And I’ve been proved right, haven’t I? He lied to me, Helen. He lied about his wife, about the fact he’s a billionaire—all lies. I don’t think he said a single honest thing to me. And no conversation is going to change that. That sort of deception is not an accident. And if he does walk through that door, the only thing he’s going to get from me is a black eye.’
‘Perhaps you’d better give me one, too. I deserve it.’ Helen rummaged in her bag for a tissue and blew her nose. ‘I hate to say this but we’re due at the hospital. We’re both on a late shift. Do you want to call in sick? The new paediatric emergency department will probably fall apart if you’re not there, but I can make excuses.’
‘No way.’ Ella closed her eyes for a moment. She couldn’t afford to lose her job. She had a baby to support. And, anyway, they needed her at the hospital. ‘I’ll be fine. Management have refused Rose’s request for extra staff yet again and the place is so busy.’
‘It’s the hot weather.’ Helen looked out of the window at the blue sky. ‘The tourists will already be on the beach, hitting themselves with cricket bats and being stung by wasps.’ She bit her lip and turned back to her friend. ‘I’m sorry, El.’
‘Forget it. It’s done.’ Numb with shock, her mind in a spin, Ella stared sightlessly out of the window. ‘You go. I’ll lock up here.’
Helen hesitated, clearly torn between going and staying. ‘Ella…’
‘Just go.’
He wouldn’t come, Ella tried to reassured herself as she listened to the soothing lap of the water against the sides of the wooden boat and tried to stay calm. He was married. He probably already had children. She’d been a convenient distraction while he’d been in London, nothing more.
Greek or not, he wasn’t going to care that she was pregnant.
It was over.
His emotions threatening to overwhelm him, Nikos glanced around the waiting room of the paediatric emergency department, aware that some sort of response was expected from him. Never before had it been this difficult to concentrate on work. His stress levels mounting with every second that passed, he dutifully scanned the neat rows of small red seats, the colourful play area and the bright murals that livened the walls. ‘You have a separate entrance for the children?’