For Eric's Sake

by Carolyn Thornton

  Brandy wanted to thank Shaw on several occasions for his treatment of Eric. Especially the night before the scheduled court appearance when Eric, sensing the importance of the morning's proceedings, shyly asked Brandy, "Do you think Shaw likes us, Brandy?"

  Brandy had been helping Eric get ready for bed. She pulled his undershirt over his head and smiled at him. "I think he likes you very much."

  Eric's face remained serious as he paused before pulling on his pajama top. "He's been very nice to me." His smooth young forehead puckered into a frown. "Taking me up in his airplane, and letting me go with him to his restaurant and help the chef with all the dinners." His big eyes were round with the importance of the occasion.

  Brandy wanted to laugh at his expression, knowing how Shaw had made him feel by introducing him to the restaurant's burly male chef. Even she had been impressed by the astonishing array of pots and pans and the incredible amount of food which could be served and consumed in a single evening.

  "Do you think Shaw likes us enough to keep us?" Eric's lower lip quivered.

  Brandy scooped him into her arms, unwilling to let him see her eyes. "Of course he does, darling." She sank her teeth into her lip and closed her eyes. At least he did for now, long enough to help her gain custody of Eric. He had even contacted his own attorney about the case, and the attorney had assured Shaw they had every possibility of winning custody.

  But how long would he be willing to keep them after that? Not long, she told herself. That was all she had asked of him, anyway. She could tell it wouldn't be easy on Eric, having first lost his parents, and then losing Shaw just as he was beginning to fill the void in his life where a father had been. Eric was growing attached to Shaw; so was she, she admitted. But how much of Shaw's attentions were genuine? How much of his actions simply came out of respect for the role he accepted when he agreed to stay married to Brandy?

  Some of Brandy's doubts must have seeped through to Eric, because instead of simply accepting her word and bounding off onto another topic, he tightened his grip on her neck and whispered, "I hope he likes us, Brandy, because I like him."

  It was at that moment, as Brandy fought against tears, that Shaw poked his head into Eric's bedroom. "What's this?" He grinned a devilish smile that suddenly made Brandy's heart melt. "Aren't you in bed yet?" He advanced into the room as Brandy and Eric drew apart. "I thought I had a date with somebody in here to finish that story about King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table?"

  Brandy sniffed, hoping Shaw would think she had just caught a cold. "Hurry up, Eric." She held out his pajama bottoms for him to step into. "You want to hear how the story ends, don't you?"

  "Yes, please, Shaw." He looked up, the smile bigger than ever on his face as his eyes filled with hero worship for the man who sat down on the edge of the bed, close enough for Brandy to feel the heat of his body and, if she leaned back, be able to rub her back against his legs.

  "Hurry up, then, Eric," Brandy urged. "Shaw doesn't have all night. He has to get back to the restaurant."

  "Not tonight." He lounged back on the bed.

  Brandy glanced over her shoulder at him, a quiver of excitement running through her at his smoldering green eyes watching her reactions. "No?"

  "No." His eyes left Brandy as Eric bounded onto the bed next to Shaw and found the place where they had finished reading the previous time.

  Brandy hid her surprise. Usually he spent the evenings at the apartment until Eric was asleep, then returned to the restaurant until late into the night. Of course, it was plausible that he could be closing down the place, staying until the last important members of his clientele left; and then he could be working on the accounts until one or two in the morning. She suspected he was spending his nights elsewhere, although once when she had needed to ask where he kept his aspirin when Eric woke up complaining of a sore throat, she had phoned the restaurant and found him there. She decided it was safer not to question why he had decided to stay home that night. He might tell her—or more to the point—he might show her.

  "Well." Brandy got up off her knees and began collecting Eric's discarded play clothes. "I'll leave you two gentlemen alone."

  "Don't." Shaw reached out and snared her wrist. A fire raced through her entire body from the mere touch of his hand. "Come listen to the story with us."

  "Please, Brandy, don't leave," Eric pleaded, sliding down between the blankets as Shaw leaned against the headboard.

  Brandy looked from Eric's eager eyes to Shaw's inviting ones, and felt his thumb gently massaging her wrist. Of course she wanted to stay, but should she? She would be safe enough as long as they had Eric between them, she thought.

  Shaw had Eric scoot over, and he pulled Brandy onto the bed next to him so that he cuddled Eric against one shoulder, and held Brandy on his other side.

  "I'll turn the pages," Brandy offered, hoping she could do so without giving away how much she bubbled inside.

  It took Eric some time to fall asleep that night, and the story was a long one. But Brandy was glad because by the time she had turned to the last page, Eric was sound asleep against Shaw's chest, and she was thinking how nice it was having him hold her close for so long. It would be so easy to love him just because he was so wonderful with children, but she steeled her heart against him. If she let herself fall under his spell, she might not ever want to leave him. She had to do that once she had custody of Eric—this time for Shaw's sake. She had invaded his life. She had no right here despite the legalities. The fact was he did not really want her here. He was merely tolerating her presence until she could win Eric. She would do everyone a favor if she remained uninvolved for the length of her stay. He had already told her he didn't want her to fall in love with him.

  Shaw droned the story to an end and Brandy quietly closed the book, but didn't move from his arms. It felt too nice, and she didn't want to disturb Eric. "I can't thank you enough for taking so much time with Eric," Brandy whispered.

  "I don't do anything I don't want to do." Shaw let the book fall onto his lap and began rubbing her upper arm. "So don't thank me."

  "He's very worried about the court case," Brandy confided, trying to ignore the nervous feeling inside.

  "He shouldn't be, nor should you," he yawned. "Wilgus says we have every chance of keeping him."

  Brandy noted his use of the word "we" instead of "you." She warmed to his generosity.

  "No matter what happens tomorrow," said Brandy, "I want you to know I'm very grateful after all I've done to you. I can't—" she swallowed back her tears and tried again, "I can't find the words to express just how much it means to me—to us."

  He turned his face against her hair, nuzzling against her neck. "Sometimes words aren't adequate in situations like this."

  "I know," said Brandy, her heart pounding at his implications. She realized if she had any sense, she would get up off the bed immediately, but if she did, the thought of what would happen next frightened her. It was safer here, with Eric asleep against Shaw's shoulder. He couldn't do much with Eric in the same bed.

  Or so she thought.

  His hand slipped down her back, snaking between her arm and body to cup her breast, as his lips began an invasion of her senses, tickling and probing her ear and neck and jaw, skipping down to her collarbone and across her shoulder.

  "Shaw!" she whispered, trying to stop him, but not wanting to, as his mouth silenced her protests and her body slipped weakly into his arms.

  Somehow he managed to settle Eric quietly against the pillow as he slid down on the bed, taking Brandy with him, stretching the length of her so that she could not move for being aware of his hard male body.

  "Shaw," she mumbled against his lips, her hands now clinging of their own volition around his neck as her mind struggled for decorum while her body protested against it. "We'll wake Eric. What will he think?"

  "Hmmm," he moved his chest from side to side, like a cobra, getting the feel of her breasts tightly against him, "probabl
y that we're very loving parents."

  Brandy tilted back her neck so that he could reach it more easily with his tender lips. If only that were true. If only she did love Shaw… Her mind protested. That wasn't the problem. If only Shaw loved her…

  She struggled against him while she still had a shred of sanity, before it was too late. She couldn't let him do this—for his sake—because if she gave in to her feelings for him, she would fight to keep him even harder than she had fought to marry him in the first place. That wouldn't be fair to Shaw. He didn't love her. He loved his freedom more. He probably always would. She had bound him to her for the sake of the child. She would not now try to bind him to her for the sake of a one-sided love.

  "No!" She shoved against him, and managed to scramble off the bed. "You don't know what you're doing!"

  "I know perfectly well what I'm doing!" he hissed, his eyes blazing with unfulfilled desire.

  "You don't love me! You just want me!"

  "You bet I want you!" He sat up, sliding his legs off the bed, ready to take up where he left off.

  "But it's all for the wrong reasons," she argued. "Just because I'm nearby and I'm a challenge to get into your bed, not because you have any decent feelings for me. Your male pride has been wounded because I haven't swooned at your feet—at least not to the degree women usually do in your presence," she qualified, realizing she had to take some of the blame for leading him this far.

  "Come here to me," he demanded.

  "No!" She stepped back, her eyes darting to Eric stirring beside Shaw in the bed. She lowered her voice. "You don't own me, Shaw Janus."

  "Have you forgotten you're my wife?"

  "In name only."

  His brows rose at that, his throaty laugh an indication that he was remembering how he had woken up with her the morning after their wedding, even if he could not recall the night of the event. "I seem to recall you married me—for the sake of the child."

  "And I told you before, Shaw Janus, that was all I wanted from you—not the privilege of sharing your bed. If you think you can blackmail me into it, think again. I told you before I will not submit to you, even for Eric's sake. If you don't want to help us, then tell me right now," she stomped her foot for emphasis, "rather than embarrass us in court tomorrow. I don't sleep with anybody in exchange for favors."

  A slight blush crept up his neck, as Brandy realized that was precisely what he had intended by staying home that night. Panic raced through her body, replacing all those tenuous feelings of loving and caring she had felt moments before. Was he so callous that he could try to use Eric's welfare to have his own way? Wasn't she guilty of using Shaw for the sake of Eric?

  "Well?" she prodded, nauseous with the uncertainty of his intentions. "Are you going to help us or not?"

  Eric stirred again beside Shaw, and he turned to look down at the sleeping boy. "You know I'm going to help him."

  She had been so tense about his answer, she almost crumpled into a heap at his words. "No," she sighed. "I didn't know."

  "But don't think," he stood up, facing her like a duelist who had met his match, "that you'll be sleeping in my bed without me much longer."

  Brandy didn't answer his challenging look. It was enough for now to know that he was on Eric's side. She could trust him to fight Eric's battle, she would have to fight her own. Without another word, he stalked out of the room and out of the apartment.

  The court proceedings went smoothly the next morning, easier than Brandy ever dreamed possible. Shaw's attorney, Max Wilgus, had done his research and was able to fight down every point Louis and May Logan made. Outwardly, Brandy's aunt and uncle could be saccharin-sweet, but Brandy knew they were seething. They had expected to meet Brandy, alone, in court. Instead, they found themselves confronted with the austere scowl of Shaw Janus who acted protective and proprietary toward Brandy and Eric. Anyone seeing them together that morning would have thought they were a couple in love, concerned with a child's welfare, hoping to adopt him into their secure nest. Even more formidable than Shaw was his attorney—one of the top lawyers in Atlanta.

  Brandy held her breath when the judge asked how long they had been married, and Shaw answered quite lovingly, "Less than two weeks, sir. The situation did precipitate our feelings for each other, but I have to admit I'm quite glad it did. My wife is rather strong-willed, Your Honor, and it might otherwise have taken me months to convince her to marry me." Brandy kept her eyes on the judge, not daring to look at Shaw. How could he say something like that under oath?

  Shaw's attorney went into a lengthy discourse about his client's background and honorability. Brandy said a silent prayer that her sudden appearance with a husband had given her aunt and uncle no time to investigate Shaw's reputation. She couldn't believe it when the judge finally announced he was giving them custody of Eric—at least for a trial period in which a welfare worker would be checking to see how Eric settled into this new environment.

  Brandy was both happy and sad. It would be some time before they would know for certain if they could keep Eric. She would have to stay with Shaw for a while longer. But how much longer after that could she keep Shaw with her before she would have to give him back his freedom?

  As they were leaving the courtroom a reporter recognized Shaw, and before he could do anything to protect Brandy and Eric from the man, they were being photographed. Shaw muttered under his breath, hustling his family out of the building, "We don't need any publicity. If that picture gets in the paper with the slightest reference to my previous reputation, I swear, I'll sue the paper!"

  "Can they do that?" Brandy asked innocently.

  "Depends on who that reporter works for. If it's the Atlanta Constitution, we're probably safe… but if it's one of those underground gossip sheets, we might have problems."

  "Oh, no," Brandy wailed. Her face filled with fear.

  "You asked for it, you know." He glared at her, no longer the image of the loving husband, as he hurried her into the car with Eric behind him. "Picking me for husband material. I'm going to have a word with Wilgus to see if he can suppress this." He slammed the door shut. "I won't be long."

  Brandy bit at her nails while he was gone. He was right, of course. She should have picked someone more stable, like Wilgus, for a husband. Why did I choose him? she wondered. It was more than the compassion she had glimpsed in him: she had to admit that now. He had many fine qualities she could find to love. She had chosen him because she couldn't consider any other man. She had been attracted to him like a moth to a flame from the first moment she had set eyes on him. She had plowed through all the conventions, trapping him in marriage, because her instincts had told her he would help her—and he had. He was going out of his way to help her and Eric. He was a wall of strength against everything that had frightened her such a short time ago. After his actions today, she was finding it more and more difficult to keep from loving him.

  I won't think about that, she told herself, looking down at Eric, who was beaming. He understood enough to know he didn't have to go home with Uncle Louis and Aunt May, at least not for a while, and that was enough for him. He did not have to worry ahead to the future the way Brandy did.

  Shaw returned and slid behind the wheel. His nut-brown hair was plastered to his forehead from the sweat that had gathered there.

  "What did he say?" Brandy asked, wondering if Wilgus could work magic.

  "He'll take care of it," Shaw assured her.

  Brandy sighed, accepting his word as simply as Eric would have done, and relaxed back in the seat for the drive home.

  Shaw pulled up in front of the apartment building, explaining he had work to catch up on and would probably be late coming in. Brandy slid out of the car as Eric skipped into the lobby of the building.

  "Hey!" Shaw shouted, as Brandy turned to follow Eric.

  She stopped and walked back to the car window, leaning down to hear what he had to say.

  "Come around to my side," he said, and Brandy did as h
e asked. "Don't I get a goodbye kiss? Sort of a thank-you for today?"

  Brandy hesitated, the mere thought of touching him filling her with delight and a dangerous awareness of her own increasing susceptibility to him.

  "I might as well start working on my new image." He grinned. "Don't you think?"

  Brandy smiled, wishing she could impulsively throw her arms around his neck and kiss the daylights out of him.

  "Come on." His raised eyebrows invited her closer. "I can't do anything in broad daylight in a parking lot with you outside of the car and me inside of it. And think what good publicity it'll be if someone comes along."

  He was right, Brandy decided, and he certainly deserved something. She had to admit that she wanted to kiss him. She bent down, her hands on the door intending to give him a peck on the cheek, but as soon as her head came near his he reached out and caught her neck, imprisoning her lips against his own.

  He took his time kissing her, drugging her with the taste of him, teasing her into a response that had her catching her breath and clutching the door to keep from fainting from the weak feeling invading her body.

  He finally drew back and looked at her. Why did they have to be here in the parking lot? she wondered. He could make her want him so easily. "Shaw?" she hesitated.

  "What?" His eyes smoldered as they looked at her, pleased with what they saw.

  Should she tell him what she was thinking? she wondered. Should she try to hide her feelings from him any longer? His eyes continued to hypnotize her. She opened her mouth and whispered, "Try not to be too late tonight?"

  His hand slid from behind her neck to caress her cheek. If she wanted to believe in fairy tales, she could say he was actually looking at her with love at that moment. It's only because that's what I want to see, she reminded herself. He smiled, and his eyebrows rose. "I won't be long."

  She stood in the middle of the driveway looking after him until the car was gone from sight. Was he acting? Or had she actually glimpsed some concern for her in his eyes? Or was she simply clutching at straws because she wanted him to love her? It would be so simple if he did, because she knew now she could give her heart to him, if he wanted it. If he loved her, and she fell in love with him, then Eric would not have to be uprooted again. But could it be she loved him—just for Eric's sake?