by Erin Trejo
“I’m think I’m gonna throw up.”
“No, you’re not. You’re fine,” he reminds me in a soothing tone. “Breathe angel.”
His soft words make my heart leap. No one has ever talked to me like that. I’ve always been whore or slut, never angel. I blink back the tears building in my eyes as my hand grips Nuts’ harder. He stops walking and steps in front of me, taking my face in his hands.
“You’re fine. You are beautiful. No one here will judge you, Cherry. It doesn’t matter if you walk around here naked covered in marks, they aren’t like that. My family is good people.” His eyes are so sincere. I nod once before he wipes the stray tear that managed to escape. Lowering his hands, he takes a step back.
“Nathaniel!” The woman squeals before Nuts has the chance to turn around. The smile on his face is pure happiness. He winks at me once more before turning and grabbing his mom into a hug. He pulls her closely and holds tight. I’m jealous. I’m jealous of the way they are bonding. I’ve never had that. I can see the love they share though. So, why is Nuts even part of the Soulless Bastards? His world couldn’t be anymore opposite than ours.
Chapter 23
Nuts
“I’m so glad you’re here,” my mom coos as she holds on tightly. I pull back and kiss her cheek before shaking hands with my dad.
“This is Cherry. Cherry, this is my mom, Ruth, and my dad, Doug.” I grab Cherry’s wrist and pull her toward them. My mom goes in for a hug which startles Cherry. She isn’t used to that kind of affection, but she will have to get used to it around here. My mom is a very loving person.
“It’s nice to meet you. I couldn’t believe that Nathaniel brought someone here. He never brings anyone here.” My mom seems to be floating on cloud nine with those words.
“It’s nice to meet you too,” Cherry says shyly.
“Is Cherry your given name?” my mom asks. The thought never occurred to me that it might not be her real name, but then again, I’ve only known her as Cherry.
“It is,” Cherry says softly, her cheeks turning pink. Fuck, I love when she blushes like that.
“Well, that’s a very beautiful and unique name. Let’s get you two settled in. Your father and I are going into town later if you’d like to join us,” Mom says happily. She grabs my arm and wraps it around hers before doing the same to Cherry. I can tell Cherry’s uncomfortable. The point of this time was for her to relax not feel worse. I pull my arm free of my mom’s and nod at Cherry. She takes the hint easily and lets her go. I move to stand next to her, wrapping my arm around her waist.
“Breathe, angel,” I whisper in her ear. Cherry takes a deep breath.
“Nathaniel, I trust you to show her where you will be staying. We are going to head out and give you two some time to settle in. I’m so pleased to meet you, Cherry.” Mom smiles at us both.
“You too.”
“Come on.” I pull Cherry along as she stares up at the staircase and then at me. The awe is evident in her eyes. I know this isn’t what she’s used to. It’s not what I’m used to anymore either.
“Ask me,” I say when she doesn’t move. My tone may be a little harsh, but I don’t like to be looked at the way she’s looking at me either. I’m not some rich kid snob like most are. That’s part of why my parents didn’t say a word when I moved out. They knew me. They knew from a young age that I didn’t want this kind of lifestyle.
“It’s so different, Nuts. Why? Why the drastic change? I mean, I knew you came from money, but damn,” she asks finally walking behind me up the stairs.
“Truth for a truth?” I ask her over my shoulder. Cherry stops walking, her body immediately becoming rigid when I add, “Nothin’ major at first.”
Cherry chews that bottom lip of hers and I swear all I want to do is kiss her.
“Ok.”
“It wasn’t really drastic for me. I never wanted to be handed anything. When I was younger, I hated it. I wanted to earn what I had. At first my parents didn’t understand it, but over time they knew how important it was to me to earn my way in life.” I shove open the bedroom door and lead Cherry inside. She stops and gasps when she looks around the room.
“Is your mom still alive?” I ask her. Cherry takes a deep breath but looks away from me.
“She was the last time I saw her,” she responds as she walks toward the bed. She sits on the edge and looks at her hands.
“You’re safe here. Whatever you say doesn’t go any further than me. You know, that right?”
Her head tips up and those bright eyes study me. I can see the questions swirling in there even before she opens her mouth. “What do you see in me?” she asks as if the thought alone boggles her. It amuses me slightly but then again, I know the life Cherry has led.
“Secrets. Heart. Hope. I can see a lot in you, Cherry. You don’t like to give in to anyone. You’re stubborn and hardheaded. You’re a lot like me, if you think about it. You don’t want things handed to you that you didn’t earn. You hold a lot of your emotions inside of you. I want them, Cherry. I want to earn everything you give me.”
She stands slowly from the bed and walks toward me with her eyes misting as her lip trembles. Her hands wrap around my waist, her face nuzzling into my chest.
“You’ve earned far more than I could ever give you,” she says into my chest, her voice muffled as she hides her face and secrets from me. Her shoulders heave with a heavy breath and all the weight and pain she carries around every day.
I nuzzle my face into her hair in inhale deeply. “I don’t think so. I’ve earned this hug. I earned that kiss, and one day I will earn your heart.”
As I cocoon her in my arms, I feel her body shake. Her sobs don’t surprise me. Cherry is very emotional and rightfully so. She has lived in a world of hell, but she still stands up and straightens her spine. She holds her head high and keeps moving forward. The difference now is that I want to walk next to her. I want to hold her and help her stand tall, especially when she feels like she can’t. I want to lead her down that path to happiness.
Chapter 24
Cherry
“It’s a damn shame to cover all that sexy,” Nuts says as he grins up at me from the towel laid out on the beach. He looks absolutely breathtaking as his tanned skin glistens in the sunlight and the light bounces off of his hair, sand dusting his legs.
“I might have showed it off if I didn’t look like I was attacked by a vampire.” I laugh. Nuts doesn’t. His face remains stern. “It was a joke, Nuts. Laugh with me.”
“I want a name, Cherry.”
I look away quickly before sitting next to him. “Truth for a truth?” I throw his words back at him before I look over.
He looks over with the hint of a smile on his face. “Go for it, sweetheart.”
“When I was little I wanted to be mermaid. It was the only thing I ever wanted. I think I was twelve when my mom traded my body for drugs. I kept my eyes closed the whole time. It hurt so badly, but I kept picturing myself as a mermaid and swimming away one day. I tried to kill myself when I was fourteen. By then I was already hanging around the clubhouse with my mom. Blu protected me for the most part. I remember him coming into my room at the clubhouse when I’d stay there. He gave me a mermaid doll that night. He said that whenever things got too hard, he was there for me. He told me that I never had to do anything I didn’t want to, and once I was old enough to legally be away from my mom, I was welcome to stay.” I blow out a breath as Nuts holds my gaze.
“And you stayed,” he states.
I nod my head before I start again, “It was all I’d ever known. I spent so much time watching my mom be the whore she was, I kind of followed in her footsteps. Blu let me have a safe place to do it, but he never wanted that for me.”
“Blu was a good guy. I’m glad he looked out for you, but I’m here now, Cherry. I want to do that for you.” His hand comes to cup my cheek. I lean into his touch enjoying all the warmth that surrounds me.
Nuts is a different
type of guy. He isn’t your typically biker. He is rough and I know he can handle himself and the club, but his heart’s in a different place.
“Of all the places you could have chosen, why Soulless Bastards?” I ask.
Nuts chuckles slightly before he says, “Would you believe it was convenient? My parents don’t live far from the clubhouse. I always saw the guys around so I tried it.” Nuts watches me closely with a slight smile on his face. He leans in slowly and presses his lips to mine.
“I’d say I deserved this,” he whispers against my lips.
His warmth is something I could get used to. I love the feeling that I get when he’s with me. His hand snakes around my neck, holding me to him. His tongue strokes my bottom lip so sweetly that I open and let him in. He kisses me soft and gently. I’ve never been kissed this way. Nuts’ fingers dig into the back of my neck so deliciously that I never want him to stop. My hand comes to rest on his chest, a groan escaping his throat. A deep rumble vibrates through him as he breaks our kiss.
“If we don’t stop now, I might never stop,” he growls against me.
“Don’t stop. Please, Nuts,” I beg him.
He smirks and pulls away, shoving to his feet. He holds his hand out to me, which I take quickly. Nuts pulls me to my feet leading me toward the ocean.
“You’re gonna swim for me first, little mermaid.” He winks as I laugh.
“You have no idea what you’re up against.” I wiggle my eyebrows at him. Nuts stops and looks at me intently.
“Is that a challenge, darlin’?”
“What are you wagering?” I ask, playing into his game.
“That’s a tough one. What did you have in mind?” he says sweetly.
“You. The wager is you,” I tell him. Nuts eyes look brighter in the sunlight. My heart picks up with that smile on his face.
“Game on, sweetheart.”
Chapter 25
Nuts
With her arms wrapped around my neck, I couldn’t be happier. She feels too perfect in my arms. I would give her anything she’d ask right now. Her lips skate over my skin, her fingers traveling over my body. I shiver from her touch as we stand under the warm water of the shower. She won our bet. Not like I fought that hard. I wanted her to win. I wanted her to have something she wanted for a change. Now we stand lost in each other’s touch in the shower. In a perfect reality, this would my dream.
“We should wait, Cherry,” I whisper against her neck. My dick is as hard as ever. I don’t know that walking away would be an option, but for her, I would make it happen.
“You lost,” she says sucking the flesh of my neck into her sweet soft lips. I groan trying to keep myself under control.
“You’re right,” I agree, backing her against the shower wall. I kiss her like there might never be another time to do it. I kiss her like it’s the last breath I’ll take. I lift her in my arms and hold her tightly. “But not in the shower, baby,” I mumble against her neck.
Cherry wiggles her body trying to get closer to me. I want her as close as possible, but I don’t want to rush this with her. I can’t take back our first time, but I can for damn sure make sure it feels like heaven for her.
I reach down and shut the water off while her lips keep moving. The moans and groans falling from my lips keep coming. With her wrapped tightly in my arms, I walk us into my bedroom. I lay her on the bed, watching the way she lies there dripping wet and waiting for me.
“Damn, Cherry,” I say as I lick my lips ready to devour every curve, dip, and valley of her body. “You remember what I said to you about bein’ mine?” I ask her. Her eyes dance with lust at my question, but that sparkle is what pulls me in.
“I remember.”
“What did I say to you?” I ask her gruffly, grabbing my dick and stroking it while she watches.
“That I’m yours and only yours,” she replies breathlessly.
I nod my head as I step up to the end of the bed. “I meant it. No one else. No other man gets to be inside of you, touchin’ you, kissin’ you,” I tell her.
She watches me as I kneel on the end of the bed, lifting her legs over my shoulders. Her breaths come in pants that turn me the fuck on. “Say it,” I growl as I lean down, running my tongue through her wetness.
“Nuts!” She screams my name as she lifts her hips toward my face.
“Say it, darlin’,” I growl once more.
“I’m yours. All yours. No one will touch me. I promise.” She cries as I suck and lick at her. Her body arches giving me better access as I take what I want from her. She tastes like pure perfection. The way she molds to my lips is like nothing I’ve ever felt before. I suck her clit until I feel her shaking around me. I know she wants to come, and I’m about to let her. I slide my tongue through her wetness plunging it inside of her. Cherry comes in a wave of pleasure. She screams my name and rocks against me. I lick my lips and climb up her body as it shudders beneath me.
“You’re mine,” I growl before letting her taste herself on my lips. She moans into my mouth as I reach between us. Grabbing my dick, I gently tease her. Cherry bucks her hips trying to get me inside of her. I give her what she wants. I slowly push into her, her mouth leaving mine. She parts her lips and tilts her head back as if to savor every last piece of me. Lowering my head, I kiss along her jaw. She is perfect. She is everything I thought she would be and more, and now she’s mine. No man will ever touch what’s mine. No one will ever come close to her the way I am right now.
“Nuts.”
My name leaving her lips makes my body come alive. Everything in me wants to take her rough and hard but I know whatever happened to her still lingers in the back of her mind. It’s all still too fresh.
“You want more?” I ask as I kiss her neck softly.
“More. So much more,” she purrs.
I grin against her giving her what she wants. I thrust a little harder, grind a little deeper. She moans and claws at my back. It’s more than I thought it would be. I pictured my first time with Cherry in my head all the goddamn time, but this, this is beyond my wildest dreams.
“Come for me, Cherry.” I lick up her neck feeling her pussy clench around me. Her panting comes faster and I know she’s almost there. I wanted to draw this out for as long as possible but feeling her this close, there’s no way.
“Come, baby. Cover me in you.” I thrust a little faster as she clenches a little tighter. That’s when I feel it. Cherry loses all control, coming roughly. I follow behind her, filling her with everything in me. I drop my head into the crock of her neck, kissing her gently as we both fall apart. Her scent intoxicates me. I never want to move from this spot, but when I hear her little stomach grumble, I smile.
“Hungry, baby?” I ask, kissing her neck once more before I pull back and look at her. Tears fill her eyes and it breaks my heart.
“Did I hurt you?” I ask concerned.
“No. You made me feel alive.”
Chapter 26
Cherry
The weekend flew by. I was shocked at how well I got along with Nuts’ parents. They were both so sweet. They didn’t judge me at all. I was worried that they would say something to Nuts about the marks that were visible, but they didn’t. I’m sure they will later on to him, but they didn’t say anything in front of me.
“What’s the look?” Nuts asks.
I sit across from him at the restaurant just watching him. He’s so different and not something I would have thought I’d like but I do. I like that he treats me differently. I like that he isn’t like the rest of them.
“Nothing. I’m just…happy.” The words leaving my mouth don’t sound right. I startle myself when I say it, but Nuts grins like a crazy man.
“Who made you happy?” he asks as if he doesn’t know. I can’t stop the smile that crosses my face.
“You did. I can’t thank you enough, Nuts.”
He grins and shakes his head before he says, “Don’t thank me. There’s nothin’ to thank me for. I want y
ou, Cherry. That includes the bad with good, yeah?”
How can he want me? He won’t after he knows what my brother has been doing to me. He will hate me. He will look at me with the same disgust that Justin does. No, no one will ever want me like that. Not when they know the truth.
“Talk to me,” he says pulling me from my thoughts. I pick at the food on my plate suddenly not as hungry as I was.
“There’s still a lot that you don’t know about me.” I say softly.
“I know that. We’ll work on it.”
I jerk my head up and look him in the eyes. He wants this to work so badly, but it won’t. It can’t. Even if I desperately want the same thing.
“We can’t work on it, Nuts. Some secrets are better left in the dark. Some will never change,” I tell him. I don’t miss the hint of anger in my own voice either. I don’t want to hurt him, not after what he and I shared this weekend, but what else can I do? I have to stop this before it gets too far.
“Don’t pull this shit with me, Cherry. Me of all fuckin’ people. Don’t you dare.” He narrows his eyes at me and it’s all I can do not to cry. I don’t want to hurt him. I really don’t. But I feel as though I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place. What choice do I have? Either push him away now or have him push me away when he finds out.
“My life isn’t your life, Nuts. You see me daily, but behind the scenes, it’s ugly. It’s a horrible place that you don’t belong,” I tell him. Admitting what Justin has done to me for years would be so easy, but I can’t do that to him. I won’t put him on Justin’s radar and I won’t hurt him that way. Justin has made threats more than once. I’ve never trusted his intentions which is another reason why being on birth control is a must for me.
Nuts sits still for a long time before shoving out of his chair. It tumbles to the floor behind him as his hands clench at his sides. His nostrils flare and his eyes are wild. I’ve pissed him off pretty well.