“In fact, I’ll drop you off,” Faith said. “That way I can use the car while you’re gone.”
Hope grinned. “Sure. Why not?” She crossed to give Faith a hard hug. “God, I’m so glad you’re my sister.”
She felt Faith returning the hug, and when Faith let go, they looked at each other and grinned. “Now go get him,” Faith said.
Hope laughed and started packing. In fifteen minutes she was ready. She hurried downstairs and encountered resistance she hadn’t expected.
Her parents were sitting at the kitchen table, where they usually remained having a cup of coffee and talking after the dishes were done. She’d always been amazed at how much they enjoyed each other’s company. She longed for a husband who would still cherish her company after so many years together. She believed Jake was that man.
“See you later,” Hope said as she breezed past them. She figured she would call them later and tell them where she was.
She only got halfway across the kitchen before her father said, “Hold up a minute.”
Hope saw Faith standing in the corner by the door, her coat on, the car keys clutched in her hand. Her sister’s lower lip was caught in her teeth and a frown furrowed her brow.
Hope turned to face her parents, who were looking at her expectantly.
“What’s the bag for?” her father asked.
“I might be out overnight,” Hope said.
“Where?” her father asked.
“Jake Whitelaw has his niece and nephew for the week, and his baby-sitter just took off. I’m going over there to help out.”
Her parents exchanged a look, and Hope braced herself for the argument she saw coming.
Hope had always believed she’d been lucky in her choice of parents. Not that babies had a choice, of course. But her mom and dad had always made her believe she could be and do and have anything she wanted, if she was willing to work hard enough for it. And they’d always been supportive of her decisions.
Except, of course, where Jake Whitelaw was concerned.
Her father believed Jake was too old and set in his ways for a young girl like herself to mold into a good husband. Her mother believed Jake was too taciturn and forbidding to be a good helpmate through life.
Faith said, “Mom, Dad, for what it’s worth, I think Hope should go.”
Hope shot her sister a look of thanks for the support. But it didn’t silence her parents.
“Are you sure this is what you want to do?” her mother said.
“Do you even know if he’ll welcome your help?” her father said. “Why don’t you call him first?”
“Mom, Dad, I know you have my best interests at heart, but this is something I have to do.” And she wasn’t about to call Jake, because she was pretty sure he would rather rope a buffalo on foot than invite her to spend a week under his roof.
Her parents exchanged another look. Troubled. Worried.
Hope crossed and hugged her mother. “Please trust me to know what I’m doing.”
“We don’t want to see you hurt,” her mother said.
She could see her father feared the same thing, though he would never say it. She leaned over and kissed his cheek. “Please, Daddy. I have to do this.”
“You’ve been making your own decisions for a while,” he said gruffly. “And you’ve done fine. Just be careful. You know we love you.”
“I know, Daddy.” She gave him another hug, aware of the scent of tobacco on his clothes, feeling the love he never failed to put into words.
She turned and followed Faith out the kitchen door.
Hope was silent during the drive to Jake’s ranch, and she felt Faith’s eyes on her, as concerned as her parents had been.
“I can wait while you check with Jake before I drive away,” Faith said as they pulled up to Jake’s kitchen door.
Hope hesitated. It would make a hasty retreat less embarrassing if Faith waited. But it would also make it easier for Jake to send her away. “No,” Hope said. “Jake is too reasonable to turn down the help. Even if it means he has to cope with having me around.”
“Are you sure you love him?” Faith asked. “Are you sure you aren’t persisting because once you’ve made up your mind, you’re too stubborn to change it?”
Hope was silent for a long time. “I’ve asked myself a million times why I haven’t walked away. I know he’s only one man and there are so many others out there.” She turned and looked at Faith, seeing her own face looking back at her, except it wore a kinder, gentler expression than she’d ever seen in her own mirror.
“I don’t understand why I love him,” Hope said. “I only know that without Jake, a part of me is missing.” She pressed a fist against her heart. “It hurts to imagine him with some other woman. It’s agony to imagine spending my life without him.”
Faith smiled. “Then go get him.”
Hope managed to smile back, but her heart was beating hard with anxiety, and there was an ache in her throat as she watched her sister drive away. There was a mud porch in back, and she set her bag on the other side of a pair of boots that had been left at the kitchen door, then knocked loudly. She wished the weather had stayed warm, because then the back door would have been open and she could have yelled out and invited herself inside.
But the weather was frigid, so she stood there and waited for what seemed a very long time.
Jake opened the door holding a howling baby in his arms. A two-year-old boy, thumb in his mouth, had an arm wrapped around Jake’s leg.
“Oh, my goodness,” Hope said as she stepped hurriedly inside and closed the door behind her. “What’s wrong with that baby?”
“How the hell—” He glanced down at the two-year-old, who clung to him as he backed away from the door, and amended, “How the heck do I know? I thought she was hungry, but she won’t eat. I can’t figure out what’s wrong with her.”
“Give her to me,” Hope said. She put the wailing baby up over her shoulder, and she immediately stopped crying.
“I guess she wanted to be upright,” Hope said.
“I already tried that once. It didn’t work for me.”
Hope didn’t know what to say. She shrugged and smiled and said, “Maybe she wanted some female company.”
Jake leaned down and picked up the little boy, who’d been tugging hard on his jeans, before his narrowed eyes focused back on Hope. “What are you doing here anyway?” he demanded.
“I...” Should she admit she knew his housekeeper was gone? But what other reason could she have had for coming? “My sister is friends with Mrs. Hernandez’s daughter. She heard you were here without any help. So, I thought—”
“No,” Jake said.
Hope made a face. “You don’t even know what I was going to say.”
“I don’t need your help. I’m managing fine.”
Hope felt unaccountably hurt. “Fine. Here. Take the baby.” She would walk home if she had to, even if she froze on the way.
Jake had the boy in one arm and had to put him down to take the baby. When he did, the boy began to cry, and when she placed the little girl in his arms, she started howling as well.
Hope heard him mutter something under his breath as she turned for the door.
“Wait,” he said. “Come get this baby.”
Hoped turned but stayed where she was. “If you want my help, you’re going to have to ask for it. Nicely.”
“Damn it—darn it, Hope,” he snarled.
She stayed where she was, her arms crossed over her chest.
“Please, Hope, I need your help. Come get this baby,” he muttered.
She quickly crossed to him and took the crying baby. She laid the little girl over her shoulder again and patted her back. Jake picked up the little boy, who stuck his thumb in his mo
uth and turned to stare at Hope with wide, tear-washed blue eyes.
“What are their names?” Hope asked, as she brushed at the little girl’s soft baby curls.
“You’re holding Becky. This young man is Huck,” he said, wrapping his arms around the little boy.
The baby suddenly gave an enormous burp.
“My goodness gracious,” Hope said, patting the baby’s back. “I’ll bet that feels better.” Hope saw that the baby’s cheek was smeared with what looked like strained peas, then noticed that Jake had a dollop of the same green goo on his temple.
“Did you by any chance feed her a bottle of milk?” Hope asked. “And then not burp her?”
“I gave her the bottle in between trying to get some green stuff in a jar down her throat,” Jake said. “What’s wrong with that?”
“Her stomach filled up with air. You have to throw her over your shoulder every once in a while and burp her.”
“How was I supposed to know that?”
“You grew up in a big family. Didn’t you ever have to take care of a baby?” Hope asked as she headed for the sink to find something with which to wash the baby’s face.
“Colt was the only one of us who was adopted as an infant,” Jake said. “And I had three sisters who fought over the chance to take care of him.”
Hope found a roll of paper towels, dampened one and used it to clean Becky’s face. She met Jake’s gaze and said, “How old were you when you were adopted?”
Jake hesitated, then said, “Nine.”
“What happened to your parents?”
He glanced down at Huck, who was staring up at him wide-eyed, and said, “This isn’t the time for that.”
“You’re right,” Hope said. “It’s time to get these little ones to bed. Where are these two bunking down?”
“Upstairs,” Jake said.
“Lead the way.” Hope followed Jake, trying not to visibly stare at everything. But she was anxious to know more about him, and this was the first time she’d been past his kitchen door.
Jake strode ahead of her, turning on lights as he went. It was definitely a man’s house, the furnishings spare but made of warm wood and leather. There were no curtains on the front windows, but what appeared to be his library had lacquered shutters blocking out the night. There was one bedroom downstairs with a sleigh bed, which she assumed had been occupied by Mrs. Hernandez. And which she hoped to occupy herself.
Jake led her upstairs and she followed, feeling the tension rise as they headed down the upstairs hallway.
“That’s my bedroom,” he said, gesturing with his chin at an open doorway at the top of the stairs.
Hope got a glimpse of a standard bed with an eight-foot Victorian headboard and a dark blue bedspread as she hurried to keep up with Jake.
He stopped at the end of the hall, shoved open a door and flipped on a light switch. “This is where the kids are staying. It’s not as convenient for the housekeeper, but I can hear them if they wake up during the night.”
The room was decorated as a nursery. Before Hope could ask, Jake volunteered the information, “My wife decorated it when we first got married...but the kids didn’t come. Before long I had nieces and nephews, so I left it this way.”
Hope looked at the charming room done in white and yellow and imagined how hard it must have been for Jake to come in here with his brothers’ and sisters’ children—but not his own. She wondered why he and his wife hadn’t had children. She wanted to ask but glanced at Huck and realized this wasn’t the time for that, either.
“Have Huck and Becky had a bath today?” Hope asked.
“Surely they can manage without a bath for one day,” Jake said, setting Huck on the youth bed. He opened the top drawer of a nearby chest and started tossing clothes around.
“When did Mrs. Hernandez say she’d be back?” Hope asked.
Jake stopped what he was doing and stared at her. “She didn’t say.”
“How long did you plan for Huck and Becky to go without a bath?”
Jake pulled out a Batman sleeper and shoved the drawer closed. “They can manage without one tonight,” he said. “I’ll worry about tomorrow come daybreak.”
“Are Becky’s clothes in the same chest?” Hope asked.
“Second drawer,” Jake said as he began stripping off Huck’s coveralls and shirt.
“How did you end up with this baby-sitting job?” Hope asked. “I mean, if you have all these sisters who have so much more experience with babies?”
“I volunteered,” Jake said.
When Hope raised an inquiring brow he said, “I figured it would be good practice.”
Hope flushed when she realized he meant for the children he planned to have with Miss Carter. “Oh. I didn’t realize you were planning a family so soon.”
“I am. I mean I was,” Jake muttered.
Hope smiled. “I suppose you changed your mind when you found out how much work a couple of kids can be.”
“Nope. I’ve always wanted a big family. I’m not too experienced yet, but all it takes is practice,” he said as he snapped Huck into his pajamas.
“I have a suggestion, before you get Huck all snapped into that thing,” Hope said.
Jake looked at her. “I’m listening.”
“You might want to make a visit to the bathroom before Huck goes down for the night. He can brush his teeth and...take care of business.”
“Oh, yeah. Right. Come on, pal. Let’s go.” He set Huck on his feet and the little boy padded into the adjoining bathroom. It was dark enough that Jake needed to turn on the light.
“What happened to change your mind about having a large family?” Hope called out to him. “Did you decide you were too old?”
Jake leaned out the bathroom doorway and said through gritted teeth, “I am not too old.”
“Then why—”
“Amanda told me last week she doesn’t want kids right away.” He disappeared back into the bathroom, but she heard him mutter, “But by the time she’s ready, I may very well be an old man.”
“I love kids,” Hope said. “Considering the fact that twins run in my family, once I marry, I should have a large family in no time.”
Jake leaned back out the doorway, a child’s toothbrush in his hand and said, “I suppose you’re going to say I should have married you if I wanted a family right away.”
She grinned and shrugged. “It’s a thought.” A delicious, delightful thought. She wondered if Jake was considering it.
He disappeared into the bathroom again. She heard the water running in the sink, then heard the toilet flush. A moment later, Jake came out with Huck. The little boy had his arms around Jake’s neck and was leaning his head on his shoulder. Jake’s large hand was cupped around the child’s head.
Hope couldn’t help imagining it was their child who was being held so carefully, so protectively. It would be a shame if Jake never had children to fill this nursery. She wondered why Amanda didn’t want children right away. As far as Hope was concerned, if she were married to the man she loved, the sooner she got pregnant, the better.
“I think this one’s ready to hit the sack,” Jake said. “How’s Becky doing?”
“I found another reason why she might have been crying downstairs. This diaper is soaking wet.”
“There’s a box of disposables on that layette beside the crib,” Jake said. He pulled down the covers and laid Huck in the youth bed, then pulled the covers up under his arms.
“Uncle Jake, read Are You My Mother?” Huck said.
“I can’t even skip pages,” Jake said to Hope as Huck scooted over to make room for him on the bed. “He has it memorized. Colt warned me the kid is insatiable when it comes to books.”
“Children learn faster when you read to t
hem,” Hope said.
“I thought your degree was in business,” Jake said.
“I’ve done a lot of baby-sitting,” Hope replied. “The kids whose parents read to them learn to read themselves at a younger age. I certainly plan to read to my kids...when I have some...which I hope will be soon.” Maybe that was laying it on a little too thick.
Jake ignored her and began reading aloud. Huck followed along, often saying the lines together with Jake and turning the pages.
Meanwhile, Hope changed the baby’s diaper, washing Becky clean with a Wet-Wipe and generously powdering her before she taped on another diaper. She’d read once that blindfolded mothers could tell their own babies by their smell. She couldn’t wait to test the theory on her own babies.
She found a green-and-yellow flowered flannel sack that tied at the bottom in the second drawer and changed Becky out of the cute corduroy overdress and trousers she was wearing into the warm nightgown. She sat in the rocker in the corner and held the baby snuggled against her, the rocker creaking, as she listened to the end of Huck’s story.
“The end,” Jake read at last.
“Read it again,” Huck urged.
“Not tonight,” Jake said. “Time for bed.”
Huck started to whine, and Jake said, “You know the drill. Brush teeth. Story. Bedtime. You need to get your sleep if you’re going riding with me tomorrow.”
“Okay, Uncle Jake,” Huck said, quickly turning over. “Night night.”
“Don’t let the bedbugs bite,” Jake replied, tucking the child in one last time. All of that was done with the sort of vigor she’d expected from a man dealing with a child.
Hope watched, her heart in her throat, as Jake gently tousled the boy’s hair and then placed a tender kiss against his forehead. Her mother would never have called Jake forbidding if she’d seen what Hope had just seen.
Jake turned out the small light over the bed, which left only the lamp by the crib. He turned and saw her in the rocker with Becky. And stopped. And stared.
Hope wasn’t sure what it was she saw in his eyes. It felt like hunger, but there was nothing sexual about it. Yearning, maybe. For his own child?
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