He smiled, taking my hand. “So you think wouldn’t have broken your vows?”
“Not for anything.”
“Then, I guess…” He thought for a moment. “Thank you—for not marrying me.”
We both laughed.
“I wouldn’t have wanted that, baby,” he added. “I wouldn’t want you to have married me and been miserable. I mean, you’re miserable now, but if we were married, I’d think it was because you’d married me and—”
“And you’d be right. In ways.”
“Yes, but not because you don’t love me. It’d be because you just love him more.”
A wave of relief rolled over me, easing my isolation. “Yeah. Exactly.”
He nodded. “If he doesn’t come back for you, Ara…”
“Mike, don’t say it.”
“No, I have to. Look, if he doesn’t come back, just… consider me your fallback guy.”
“I’ll never do that,” I said softly. “I’d rather be alone for the rest of my life than ruin yours.”
“And what if we find him, and he says he’s not interested?”
I never thought of that. I’d dreamed him up in my mind to be some saint who was just waiting to come back to me. But what if Eric was right? What if David left me behind when he ran away because he really didn’t care?
“Then we better hurry up and find him. Because I need to know,” I said. “But, even then, I’m not sure I’d ever move on from that, Mike.”
His brows slowly crept up to his hairline. “I am well aware of that, baby girl. But even if that’s the case, you’re going to need a man who understands that.”
“And you need a girl who loves you for the amazing, wonderful, charming, sweet, loving and compassionate guy you are.”
He leaned closer and kissed my cheek. “I have her already.”
What could I say to that? It was true. “Well, in the meantime, if you meet a nice girl and she sweeps you off your feet, please don’t wait around for me. Promise?”
He linked his pinkie over mine. “I promise.”
“Okay.” I grinned, hugging a pillow in my lap as I sat up on my knees. “Now, tell me everything you and David talked about. I need to visit him through your memories.”
Mike laughed. “Okay. Where do you want me to start?”
“Start with how you took it when he said he was a vampire.”
“Okay, well, it wasn’t like the way you did, which, by the way”—he patted my arm—“I’m very proud of you for.”
“Thanks.”
“Any time. So… let’s see.” His eyes dipped in to the past. “I was waiting for the paramedics to bring you in. I’d called my mom and dad to let them know what happened, and after I hung up, the screen went back to the call history. And David’s number was there. So I called him.”
“And he answered?”
“He picked up straight away.”
“Did he know I’d been attacked?”
“No. He answered with ‘Hey, what’s up, Mike?’, so I figured then that he hadn’t heard, or he was pretending not to know.”
“You thought he was guilty?”
“I had my suspicions.”
“Why?”
“I saw the guy that ran off with you, and it’s pretty safe to say he looked just like David.”
“Oh.” Yes, he did; an exact likeness.
“I asked him where he was, and he said he was across town, that he’d been in a meeting, which I know now was with the World Council.”
“What was if for?”
“To request an eighty-years leave of absence.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. They denied him.”
I scoffed. “Figured as much.”
“But he must have heard something in the tone of my voice, because he asked what had happened.”
“What did you say?”
“I was very matter-of-fact. Maybe even a little unfriendly. I just told him you’d been attacked, possibly raped, that you were in General Hospital, and he appeared beside me about ninety-seconds later.”
“Oops.”
“Yeah, oops. My cop brain went into overdrive and I started thinking the depraved prick had attacked you—been standing by to watch his victim suffer, you know, like that case I was working on last year.”
I nodded, not needing any details on that one again.
“Anyway, I did a bit of probing. He didn’t seem to know too much, so I settled down a bit, but my gut was telling me that in some way, maybe even by association, he was to blame. I just wanted to ring his bloody neck the entire time.”
“Did he know it was a vampire attack?”
“No. Not then. He kept asking about your dress—where it was. He wanted to get dogs on it to get the scent. I didn’t know it then, but he actually wanted to track the guy down himself and do any manner of unspeakable things to him.” Mike laughed. “We shared that sentiment.”
I grimaced, trying to find the light humor in that too, but it all just conjured up too many painful memories.
“Anyway,” Mike continued. “When I finally told him the police had it, he just paced the floors. I knew he wanted to kill me; knew he blamed me for letting you get kidnapped. But I blamed myself enough, though, Ara. I didn’t need him adding to it.”
“Did he say he blamed you?”
“No, but he looked at me like he was gonna kill me a few times. If I’d known then what I know now, I would have been terrified.” He laughed.
“Hm.” I imagined David and Mike standing in a room together, one on either side, folded arms, shooting an occasional glare of hatred across to the other. “He would have also been reading your mind, you know, to see if you’d actually done it.”
“Probably.” He laughed. “That was bloody annoying, that mind-reading bull crap.”
“I know. Trust me, I know.” We both laughed easily.
“Anyway, so they brought you out of surgery and wheeled you into intensive care. When the nurse started talking about the laceration on your neck…” Mike’s eyes went dark.
“What? What happened?”
“David covered his mouth,” Mike said, “felt for the wall and just fell back against it. And I guess that’s when he realized it was a vampire attack.”
“What did you make of that reaction?”
“Well, we were all devastated. When they brought you in and Vicki saw you for the first time, she actually fainted. Greg was dealing with her, and I was talking to the doctor. But David just lost it. I didn’t think too much of it at first, just thought maybe he was really devastated, but I knew then, at that moment, that it wasn’t him who hurt you. Except…”
“Except?”
“I wouldn’t listen to my own reason. I was angry, scared, exhausted. And I’d pegged him as guilty, you know, right from the moment you were kidnapped. But to be fair, the guy…” His eyes travelled to the memory. “I wasn’t kidding when I said that guy looked just like him. And I’d only seen his face in a picture on the wall at your school—David’s—but that night at the hospital, when I saw that jaw and those eyes, I pegged him as the kidnapper no matter what fact or sensibility told me. I was gunning for revenge, and he was the one who was going to pay.”
“Did you report him to the police?”
“No.” His fists tightened. “I followed him down to the parking garage. Found him hyperventilating against a wall.”
I covered my mouth.
“I grabbed him by the shirt,” he continued, “spun him around and screamed in his face, demanding he admit it.”
“Did he hurt you?”
“No. He did the opposite. He said it was his fault—told me to kill him, that he did this to you.”
“But he didn’t.”
“I know. But I wanted my suspicions validated, not the facts. I pounded my fists into his face so many times his skull should have caved in, or his skin should have at least come off his bones. It’s lucky he was immortal because, otherwise, I’d be in prison right now.
” Mike looked at his knuckles, at the tiny white dots littering the tops of his hands, grazed now and a little bloody after he hit Eric.
“These were from David?” I ran my fingers over the scars as if maybe some small piece of David might still be in there. “How did you… I mean, how were your hands not broken after? I can’t believe you even managed to make a vampire bleed.”
“Oh, they bleed, Ara, and they feel pain. Granted”—he squeezed his fists, looking off into the corner of my room—“it takes a hell of a lot more to break their skin, said the twenty cracked and shattered bones in my hands, but they do bleed.”
“Yes, but they don’t die.” I cupped his scabbed hand, as if I could make it all better. “I can’t believe you even tried to kill him.”
“I didn’t try to kill him, Ar. But I did beat him until the fury wore off, wondering all the while why he was still breathing—still conscious.”
“Is that when you caught on?”
“Nope. Not even then. I was exhausted, pretty beaten up myself. I just couldn’t hit any more. I sat down beside him, covered in his and my blood, and just cried.”
I pictured it all, seeing the shadows and dark corners of the underground parking garage at the hospital; seeing two guys I loved, almost equally, sitting side by side, both bleeding, bodies and hearts damaged beyond repair.
We stayed silent for a minute, both of us clearly lost in thought: his, a memory; mine, imagination.
“And then what?” I asked.
“Then, he stood up, well, stumbled up, and said it would never be that easy. There was no death for him; that, in his words, God would not bless him with such mercy. I asked him what he meant, and he just stopped limping away, turned back to face me and said, I’m a vampire. That girl is lying in that bed, dying right now, because I exist.”
“What did you say?”
“I wasn’t surprised by this point. I just stood up. My hands were so damaged I couldn’t even feel the wall under them, but I got up and asked him if he’d attacked you.”
“What did he say?”
“He just looked down at his hands and said, It’s as if I did.”
“And then what?”
“Then, he walked away. And I realized I’d just taken my fury out on, and almost killed, an innocent man.”
“I can’t believe you did that.”
He laughed. “No. Me either, and I felt really bad about it. He went and had a feed or something, I guess, then came back an hour later clean but still cut and bruised, and sat by your bed until morning.”
“Why didn’t he heal?”
“I don’t think he was eating enough. He was punishing himself, I figured. In some way, I think he wanted to heal like a human.”
“Like I had to?”
“Yes.” He nodded, sympathy eating his expression. “And I respected him for that.”
“And you talked a lot?”
“It took a while. At first, we bickered a lot, but over time we realized we had a lot in common—mainly you; our love for you, and the fact that we both just wanted what was best.”
“Yeah, except he thought it was best to leave me.”
“No,” he said simply.
“Yes, he did.”
“No. He had no choice, Ara.”
“There’s always a choice.”
“Not in his world.”
“What would you know about it?” I crossed my arms.
“We discussed it at length. He wasn’t even supposed to stay in the hospital as long as he did, and he was actually punished by the Set for not returning to duty when requested.”
“What kind of punishment?”
“It’s okay, Ara.” He touched my shoulder with the palm of reassurance. “They actually just cut his pay for three years.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. When I showed my surprise at that, he said they weren’t all torture and gore.”
I felt my body come back to life again, the ghost of worry sent home for a while. “So, they gave him more time to be with me?”
“A little. They were actually very understanding and compassionate. But he knew he’d have to go eventually—if you didn’t turn.”
“Did you ever think I would turn?”
“Yeah,” he said with surety. “We were actually almost sure of it. But we just had no idea what signs we were looking for or if you’d die first then come back, and his uncle wouldn’t comment; wouldn’t come to see you and check if you were changing. He wanted no part of it.”
“Why?”
“Because if you turned, despite this being an attack, apparently he was worried David might be accused of turning you, or orchestrating the entire attack to that end, and face a pretty gruesome punishment.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah, so he just wanted to stay out of it—told David if you turned that he should hide you and make sure no one ever found you.”
“Really?”
“Yup. And he’d made plans, had passports ready if that was the case. But…” He scratched the top of his knuckle. “We also had to talk about the other option: what would happen if you woke up human or… not at all.”
“Would he have left if I’d not woken when I did?”
He held silent for a long time. “I’m not sure.”
“Would you?”
“No.” He looked right at me. “Not ever. And David made me promise him that no matter what, whether you woke or stayed asleep, I would never leave you. Not for anything.”
“And that’s why you came back here?”
“It was one of the reasons.” He nodded. “But I didn’t make that promise for his sake, Ara. I made it for yours, and I made it to you a long time ago, before we ever even knew David.”
“I know.” I saw that memory as a bright sunny day in my mind. “I guess I just never expected you to actually keep it, especially not after I broke your heart.”
“My heart is fine, okay.” He patted my knee. “I’m still breathing. I still have you. I’ll be fine.”
“Yeah, but so will David,” I said spitefully. “He gets to come in here, turn my life upside down, and then leave the Set—something I begged him to do—without even taking me with him. Do you have any idea how insignificant that makes me feel?”
Mike sat for a second, his lips pressed thin, his thoughts elsewhere. “No, I don’t. I really don’t. But I also don’t think it’s a fair statement to say that David got off scot-free.”
“What do you mean?”
“It hit him pretty hard, you know. As I said, we waited to see if you’d turn. And we had no idea when it would happen. But… when you died and then started breathing again with a full beating heart, he had to face the reality that you couldn’t be immortal. Ever. And there was no way for me to console him. I just… I had to just stand back.”
“Stand back?”
“He cried. Like a damn baby.”
“So, he’d rather I’d died?”
“No. He was overjoyed that you survived. But once that elation stepped aside, the rest sunk in.”
“He didn’t seem too upset that I had to stay human.”
“I know, baby.” Mike took my hand until I looked at him. “But you weren’t there to see him break. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone fall so hard.”
I looked down at my knees.
“He still loves you—”
“But Eric says—”
“Fuck Eric, Ara. Okay, don’t fuck him,” he said firmly, and we both laughed. “But, I’m sure of it, okay. I’m sure he still loves you. So… I know your heart is broken right now and there’s nothing that can fill that empty space he left, but we’re gonna find him. And if he doesn’t want you, he can tell you to your face.”
I rolled forward and lay down with my face in Mike’s lap. “Thanks, Mike.”
“Don’t mention it. Just…” His arm folded around my waist, resting there heavily. “Just do me a favor though: don’t let that Eric shithead force his blood on you again. He shouldn’ta do
ne that to you.”
“He thought he was helping.”
“And what were you thinking?”
I thought back to that moment. “Only about the blood.”
“Hm.” He squeezed my waist absently. “Does it taste awful?”
I shook my head. “It’s actually really nice. You should try it.”
“Uh, yeah, over my dead body.”
“Well, I have a pet vampire. That could be arranged.”
“Oh, so now you’re starting with the death threats.” He tickled my ribs. “It won’t make me love you more.”
“Good, then you don’t need hospitalizing.”
“Not like you do, huh?”
I snuggled against his lap, instead of slapping him, and watched the two on the bed through my mirror’s reflection. The girl looked… almost happy.
“Thanks for calling work for me, by the way. I really hate that job.”
“So quit.”
“I can’t quit. I need the money.”
“Take mine. I’ve got plenty.”
“Mike, stop it.”
“I’m serious.”
“Mike. I’m not taking your money. You know me better than that.”
“Fine. Then what do I have to do to get you happy with your life?”
“You mean aside from bringing David back?” I said, thinking. “Give my students the will to learn.”
“Your wish is my command.”
I laughed. “Yeah, if only. They’re all just snobby rich kids with no talent. Except one: Aaron. When I eventually run classes from home, I’m taking him with me.”
Mike wrapped his arms tighter around me. “Two more years then, and you can afford that piano.”
“Yep,” I said sleepily. “Just two more years.”
7
The wild dance of branches gave warning that autumn was on its way, and the night sky outlined the trees in dark blue, completely hiding the lake across the road. I slipped my car into gear, hopped out and shut my door quietly, feeling an eerie chill on my skin that wasn’t incited by the wind.
The muscles tightened in my neck then, and I turned, seeing a silhouette across the road, unmoving.
“Hello?”
There was nothing threatening about the height or general size of the, what I assumed was a man, but in comparison to me, small and slight, standing on the driveway outside my house with nothing but the moonlight to show the rows of fences along the footpath, his mere presence made me feel suddenly uneasy.
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