Daring to Trust

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by Trisha Wilson


  She had already spread the blanket on the ground and she took the basket from him once he reached her. “Go ahead and sit down; stretch out or whatever you need to do.”

  He sat down, with his broken leg stretched out in front of him, and then he patted the blanket. “Your turn.”

  Suddenly, she looked at him, and said, “I have a question for you.”

  “Shoot.”

  “Has there been someone else since you’ve been gone?”

  Stunned she even had to ask, he looked at her, “Of course, there hasn’t been anyone else! Why would you even think that? It’s always only been you!”

  “Well you were gone for a long time. What else am I supposed to think, except that there was another woman involved?”

  “I’ve been working since the day I left, one case right after another. This is the first time I’ve even taken off work. I worked seven days a week, thinking it would keep you off my mind. I even worked all of the holidays so some of the other guys could spend them with their families. Even if you tell me to go away and never come back, there’ll never be anyone else for me but you. You gotta believe me!”

  She whispered, “I believe you.” Then, she cleared her throat, and added, “You’re still my husband but I feel like I don’t know you anymore.”

  Wishing things were

  different, he assured her, “I’m still the same man you married. I’d like to think I’ve grown up a lot in the last four years. Will you let me prove it to you?” Remembering the man from the diner, he asked, “Or have you found someone new?”

  ****

  Julia couldn’t believe the nerve Mark had! Shoving her left hand in his face, she demanded, “Do you see this ring? This is the ring you gave me on our wedding day; I have never taken it off. I’m not the one who walked out on our marriage!”

  He rubbed his hand down his face, and gazing toward the water, sighed, “This ain’t getting’ us anywhere, Jules. I was referring to the man I saw you sitting by at the diner.”

  Puzzled, she began, “The man—,” then she remembered, “Oh you mean, Bryan? That was business.”

  He snapped his head back to look at her, “Business? Aren’t you still teaching?”

  He could be so dense sometimes, she thought. “Yes, I’m still teaching the secondgraders. I was meeting him about a rental property.”

  “Oh. Why did you move out of that little apartment we lived in together?” he asked.

  “Ellen’s business became slow, with the economy and it just seemed to be the best option at the time. I moved in with her to help her avoid having to sell her house, and to help me forget about you.”

  “Oh. Did it work?”

  “Yes. She still has her house.”

  “No, I meant were you able to forget about me?”

  Somberly, she answered, “No, I don’t think there’s any cure for that.” Remembering the food, she brought the picnic basket in front of her and started pulling the items out. “Do you still like bologna sandwiches? I made you one the way you used to eat them, with tomato, lettuce and mayonnaise on wheat bread. I brought chocolate chip cookies for dessert. I hope that’s okay.”

  He responded, “That sounds great, but you didn’t have to bring any food. Your company is all I was looking forward to.” Suddenly, he snapped his fingers, seeming to remember something, “I’ll be right back.”

  She watched him hobble to his jeep and get something out. When he turned around and she saw the calla lilies, she felt her heart catch in her chest. He remembered, she thought in wonderment. After he handed them to her, she said, “Thank you, Mark. They’re beautiful.”

  “Not as beautiful as you,” he remarked. Blushing, she looked down and stuck her nose in the flowers.

  Changing the subject, she asked, “So, where do we go from here?”

  He looked at her, with love shining in his eyes, “Honey, I’ll do whatever you want me to do to make this right. If you want us to go to counseling, I will. If you want us to begin again, I’ll happily chase you again. So, you tell me.”

  Feeling a tear trickling down her cheek, she told him truthfully, “Mark, I just don’t know how to trust you again. How do I know that you won’t walk out if times get tough, again? I needed you, and instead of holding me or assuring me things would be okay, you walked out. I know I shouldn’t have said what I did and I’m sorry. I was hurting and I took it out on you. I thought you’d be back after you cooled off.”

  “I’m here now. I know things are not the same. Just give me another chance, and I promise I’ll never leave you again, no matter what obstacles come our way.”

  She wanted so bad to believe that things could be as they were before. She just wasn’t sure if her heart could take him leaving again. With tears in her eyes, she looked at him, longingly. “I need some time to think. I just don’t know. Can you give me a couple of days?”

  “Sure, that’s not a problem. I ain’t going anywhere. Just call me whenever you feel like talking some more.”

  They packed up the picnic supplies and left, each going their separate ways.

  ~Chapter 6~

  Several days had passed,

  and Mark still hadn’t heard back from Julia. He decided he needed to sweep her off her feet, or at least try. That Friday evening, he pulled up in the driveway of Ellen’s house, and walked up to the door. He had gone to the local doctor the day before and he had been released from the crutches. They had made him a cast he could walk in; it wasn’t comfortable but it was better than those detestable crutches. After he rang the doorbell, Mark noticed Julia’s SUV wasn’t sitting in the driveway. Wow, he thought, a few weeks off work and my brain has gone to mush not to notice even the small details.

  Ellen answered the door, “She’s not here,” before he even had a chance to say anything.

  “Do you know when she’ll be back?” he asked her, as politely as he could manage.

  “Nope.”

  Slowly, he said, “Okay….do you know where she is?”

  “Yup.”

  Sighing, Mark asked, “Will you tell me where she is?”

  “Why?” Ellen asked.

  “Because I want to see her. Would you please tell me where I can find her?”

  “What if she doesn’t wanna see you? Did you ever think of that?”

  Giving up, he headed back toward his jeep, saying over his shoulder, “Never mind. I’ll find her myself.”

  So quietly that he almost didn’t hear her, she said, “She’s at her parents’ house for a few days.”

  ****

  Julia had went to her parents’ for a few days, to clear her head and maybe figure out what she was going to do. They had a pond around back, and she always got some of her best thinking done there. Sitting on the bank, she had her feet in the water when she realized she hadn’t called Bryan back about renting that house. Pulling out her cell phone, she punched in his number. After he picked up, she said, “Bryan? This is Julia Turner. I’m sorry I haven’t called you sooner about that house. Is it still available?”

  He laughed on the other end, “Sure it is. I’ve been holding it for you. I knew you were interested in it.”

  Breathing out a sigh of relief, she said, “Thank you so much! Is tomorrow a good day to sign the papers?”

  “Sure. I’ll meet you at the house. I’ve got some business to take care of tomorrow afternoon, so is eight in the morning too early for you?”

  “That’s fine. I’ll see you then,” she said and hung up.

  After putting her phone back in her pocket, she heard someone call her name. She turned around and saw Mark coming toward her. Once he drew closer, she asked, “What are you doing here?”

  Sitting down beside her, he said, “Ellen said I could find you here. I hadn’t heard from you and wanted to see you. Do you want me to leave?”

  “No, it’s fine. Where are your crutches?”

  He glanced down at his leg and replied, “Doc released me from ‘em. He gave me a walking cast yesterday
.”

  “Oh.” Curious, she questioned, “Are you going to tell me what happened to you?”

  “Just another day at the office,” he answered.

  She pinned him with a look, “Were you undercover?”

  “Yes, but Jules you don’t want to hear about it.”

  She narrowed her eyes, “I asked, didn’t I?”

  Leaning back on his elbows, he proceeded to tell her, “I was undercover in this drug ring near Nashville. My cover got blown. I still don’t know how, but Greg, my partner, is looking into it. Well, after they discovered my real identity, they locked me in this room and beat me, daily. One of the men, Big John, was the one who done the majority of the beating. If it weren’t for Greg finding me when he did, I doubt I’d be here. I was in the hospital for a couple of weeks. I don’t remember much about those last few days before I was rescued.”

  Gasping, Julia covered her mouth, “Oh my. Are you okay now? I mean, was there any permanent damage?”

  Chuckling, he tapped his forehead, “I still got my noggin’; I reckon that’s the important thing. All I could think about, though, when I was in that room, was you. The thought of seeing you again kept me going.”

  Fighting back tears, she whispered, “I’m glad you’re here.”

  He cleared his throat, “Thanks, I’m glad you feel that way.”

  Deciding to tell him, she said, “I’m going in the morning to sign the papers on that rental house. Do you want to come with me?”

  He smiled, “I’d love to. I’ll pick you up. What time?”

  “I’m meeting Bryan at eight.”

  Hearing her name being called again, she turned around to see her mom waving at her from the back door. “I need to go see what she needs.” After she put her flip-flops back on, Mark followed her up to the house.

  Reaching the door, she asked, “What is it, Mom?”

  Janet pointed to the dining room table, “Oh I was going to tell you supper’s about ready. Mark, would you like to stay for supper?”

  He glanced at Julia, “I don’t know if that’d be a good idea.”

  For the first time, she smiled, saying, “Stay. I want you to.”

  ****

  When Mark saw Julia smile, he felt like the sun had finally come out after four years of it being dark. Returning the smile, he said, “Thanks. I’d love to stay.”

  It was only after they’d all sat down to eat, before her dad seemed to notice he was there. William stood up and pointed at him, but looked at Julia, “What’s the meaning of this?”

  Softly, Julia said, “Dad, please. I want him here.”

  Her dad sat back down, sputtering, “Pretty bad when a man don’t have say-so at his own kitchen table.” Looking square at Mark, “After we eat, you and me, young man, are gonna have a chat.” When he saw Julia begin to object, he added, “In private. And you, young lady, can like it or lump it. It’s high time somebody set this boy straight.”

  Julia looked at Mark, with an apology in her eyes. He just shrugged, “It’s okay. I deserve it.”

  Hearing him, her dad boomed, “Darn right, you do!”

  Once they ate a good meal of meatloaf, mashed potatoes, green beans, corn on the cob and cornbread, Janet brought out a peach cobbler. “Who wants a piece?”

  Mark rubbed his belly and laughed, “If I eat another bite right now, I’ll bust. It was delicious, thank you.”

  Julia agreed, adding, “Not right now, Mom. Save me a piece and I’ll eat it later.”

  Mark didn’t know why but he had the urge to call Julia’s dad, Santa. He had the beard, the loud voice, even the belly. Smiling to himself at that thought, he heard Santa say, “None for me now, dear. I’ve got some business to take care of.” William got up and tapped him on the shoulder as he passed, “Come on.”

  He glanced at Julia, and she mouthed, good luck. Mark just winked at her in response and followed her father out of the room.

  They went into the den and William pointed to an armchair, “Sit.” After they got situated, her father glared at him, and began, “So before we start, Matt told me a little about what happened to you but I want you to tell me all of it.”

  Mark stared at him a moment, unsure if he’d heard right and definitely shocked her dad would care about that, especially after how he’d walked out on Jules. He decided just to tell him the shortened version, just as he had told her. When he finished, her dad asked, “How’d they find out who you were?”

  Shrugging, Mark answered, “I don’t know, sir. My partner, Greg, is looking into it.”

  “But you’re not in any danger being here?”

  “No, sir. They’re all in jail awaiting trial.”

  “Alright, then. I just wanted to make sure my baby girl wasn’t in the line of fire with you suddenly back in the picture.”

  Ah, Mark thought. There it was. He hadn’t been concerned about him. Good old dad had just been worried about Julia, which is as it should be. Doesn’t he know that I wouldn’t have ever come back here if there was any chance of them finding him and getting to her?

  Clearing his throat, Mark stated, “Sir, I know I was a cad walking out on Julia. I’ve regretted my actions ever since. There hasn’t been a day that has passed I haven’t wanted to come back.”

  William roared, “Then why didn’t you?”

  “Honestly? Because I didn’t feel like I deserved her anymore. I wasn’t here for her when she needed me, so why shouldn’t I stay away? Plus I felt guilty, and didn’t figure she’d even want me here.”

  “Guilty? Because you weren’t here when she lost that baby?” William asked.

  “Partly. If I had been here, then maybe I could’ve gotten her to the hospital in time and maybe she would’ve still been pregnant.”

  Gently, her father said, “Son, there was nothing you could have done any differently, except you should’ve stayed when you did get home, instead of leaving at the first chance you got.”

  Hanging his head in defeat, Mark sighed, “Maybe you’re right. Maybe not. Guess we’ll never know, will we?”

  “So are you sticking around this time or just visiting?”

  “I don’t plan on going anywhere, unless she tells me to get lost,” Mark promised.

  “Well, let me tell you something, Son. If you ever hurt my baby girl again, I’ll skin you alive, ya hear me? Last time, I was madder than a wet hornet and wanted to hunt you down so bad. You better be lucky my wife likes you a little, she kept stopping me.”

  Knowing he absolutely didn’t want to get on his bad side, Mark chuckled, “Understood, sir, loud and clear.”

  Her dad looked at him and said, “Go on, get outta here. I’m done with you.”

  Mark got up to take his leave, saying, “Yes, sir. It was good seeing you again, sir.”

  He made it nearly to the door when William stopped him, “Mark. By the way, it is good to have you back, even if I do still want to pound your head into the ground.”

  Laughing, Mark shook his head, threw his hand up in acknowledgement and walked out the door.

  ****

  The next morning, Julia was ready and waiting when Mark picked her up at her parents’ house. Once she got in his jeep, she told him where the house was and they headed in that direction. Bryan was already there when they pulled up. She introduced Mark, and Bryan started going over the rental agreement. Then, he looked at them both and asked, “So are both of you going to be living here?”

  Julia laughed nervously, “No, just me.” Then, she glanced at Mark, adding, “For now, anyway.”

  A few minutes later, she had the signed contract in one hand and the key in the other.

  Mark raised an eyebrow, “Well looks like you’re ready to move in, since he left the utilities on. You can always go Monday and have them switched to your name.”

  Excited, Julia threw her arms around Mark’s neck, “I know!” When she realized what she’d done, she pulled back, saying, “I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.”

  Mark laughed,
“No, don’t be sorry. I enjoyed it. Come here,” and he pulled her close again. He tilted her chin up and leaned in for a kiss.

  The kiss was so tender that Julia’s heart ached for all the time they had been apart. Oh, how she had missed him.

  ~Chapter 7~

  After two weeks had

  passed, Mark believed he and Julia were getting back on the right track. They were spending every day together and talking, just like old times. It had been a long time since he’d been this at ease. He hadn’t thought it possible, but he loved her more now than he had back then. He thought she was beginning to trust him again, but he couldn’t really be sure. Currently, they were walking around the softball field at the high school, holding hands.

  She asked him, “I haven’t asked you this since you’ve been back, but how are your parents doing?”

  His parents had retired to Florida shortly after he and Julia had gotten married. “They’re doing good. Dad took up golf and Mom joined a book club.”

  Julia laughed, “I thought the reason they wanted to retire is so they’d spend more time together.”

  Joining in her laughter, he said, “I know! Go figure, right!”

  She pointed to the middle of the field, “Remember the night you pulled your truck in there and parked it on the pitcher’s mound. We lay down in the truck bed, talking and looking at the stars.”

  Laughing, he said, “Yes, I remember that. I remember your dad wanting to tan my hide when I finally got you home, too!”

  “Oh Daddy’s just a big cuddly bear. He wouldn’t have hurt you.”

  Shaking his head, Mark said, “I still can’t believe we fell asleep and the sun coming up the next morning was what woke us.” Remembering, he asked, “Do you remember how we drove everyone crazy with our special code? We could talk about everything in a crowd, and no one ever knew what we were saying. I’ve missed that.”

 

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