by Beth Orsoff
"Of course." Two days ago I’d felt exactly the same way. "I’ll be in the cabin if you need me."
Trudging back up the hill was enough to wear me out. I went straight to the loft and dozed until I heard Ethan leave. Once he was gone, I went to the office to monitor the radio. It was a useful way to procrastinate. I knew once I actually started writing the script for the documentary I’d really start to panic.
I was scribbling in the log book when Jill and Jake returned. "Sydney, you don’t have to do that. Even volunteers get the day off for national holidays."
"Do the whales know that? Because someone just reported a couple of humpbacks."
"Where?" Jill asked, peering over my shoulder. When I read off the coordinates she said, "That’s close. You should go have a look."
"You can see them from the island?"
She nodded. "There’s an observation area above the sea lion beach."
"Where is that again?" I remembered Jill pointing it out to me on my first day, but I knew I’d never find it on my own.
"Jake can take you there."
We stopped at my tent first so I could grab my binoculars. Brie was gone, but we found Sean and Tony in the clearing tossing a Frisbee. When Jake told them about the whales, they decided to come too. Jake wanted to invite Ethan also, but thankfully he wasn’t around.
The hike to the observation area was slow going, both because we hadn’t yet extended the trail to this side of the island, and because three of the four of us were hung over. Tony was the first to spot the whales—one huge one and another half its size. We all pulled out our binoculars, but the whales immediately dived, so all we were able to see were their giant tails as they sank down into the sea.
We all kept our focus on the ocean, but after a few minutes of staring at nothing but white caps, I leaned back against the rocks and closed my eyes. The sun peeking through the clouds felt warm on my face, and I could hardly smell the walruses and sea lions from this high up. The bird guano was another matter, although I was learning to ignore it.
"Are they coming back?" Jake asked.
"They’re looking for food," Tony told him. "They’ll be back soon."
"You want to play a game?" Jake asked.
"No!" we all said in unison.
"Sydney, you promised," Jake whined.
"When?"
"This morning. You promised if I was quiet you’d play a game with me."
Ugh! "Don’t you know you can’t hold people to promises they make before six a.m.?" Or when they’re hung over and just want to sleep.
"Sydneeeeey!"
"Okay, okay," I said, kneading my forehead to keep my headache at bay. "Later, I promise."
Then Tony shouted, "Look!" as the whales leapt out of the water and crashed down onto the surface, blowing a stream of fluid ten feet into the air.
"Is that one the mommy?" Jake asked, pointing to the larger of the two.
"Probably," Tony said, standing up now. "Humpbacks have been known to nurse their calves for up to a year."
"What’s nurse?" Jake asked.
I wasn’t touching that one. Tony gave Jake a very scientific-sounding explanation, which of course he didn’t understand, so Sean told him, "It’s like when babies drink milk from a bottle, but it comes from the mother instead."
Jake looked like he was about to ask a follow up when a third whale came bursting out of the water and crashed down next to the other two. This one wasn’t quite as large as the mother but was much bigger than the baby. Tony estimated he was close to forty feet long and weighed several tons.
"Is that the daddy?" Jake asked.
"It could be," Tony said.
"You mean father whales don’t just abandon their families for the summer like the walruses do?" For some reason I could not let that one go. If I had to play armchair psychiatrist I’d say it had something to do with my own father abandoning me. Although unlike the walrus fathers, mine didn’t return after a summer at the beach. He did, however, have the nerve to send me a holiday card after over ten years with no contact. I burned it in Blake’s fireplace last Christmas Eve.
Tony set down his binoculars and smiled. "I heard about that."
I assumed he was referring to my conversation with Duncan and Ethan. Although that was equally surprising since I didn’t think Duncan was the type to gossip, and Ethan had no friends. "Who told you?"
"I overheard Ethan complaining to Jill."
"Ethan was complaining about me! That—" I was about to let loose with a string of expletives, but I looked over at Jake and caught myself in time.
"Relax," he said. "No one cares what Ethan thinks."
We watched the whales until they disappeared farther out to sea, then we hiked back down to the cabin. After lunch I packed up my laptop and sat phone and told Jill I was heading back to my tent. It may have been a holiday for everyone else but I still had a screenplay to write.
"No, Sydney," Jake said, grabbing my hand, "we have to play a game."
The kid was relentless. "Later, Jake. We’ve got all afternoon."
"Sydneeey!"
"Jake, leave Sydney alone."
"Mommy, she promised."
"It’s true," Sean said, piping up from the dining table where he and Tony were playing blackjack. "We heard it."
Apparently the bonds of our newly formed friendship extended only to irritating Ethan.
"See!" Jake said to Jill while continuing to tug on me.
Obviously I wasn’t going to get out of it. Plus, it’s not like I really wanted to work on the script anyway. "All right, go get your stupid game."
"It’s not stupid. It’s Star Wars."
"Star Wars is a movie, not a game." Or six movies, if you wanted to get technical.
Jill smiled. "Sorry, Sydney, you’re not that lucky."
Chapter 25
Jake ran up to the loft, and moments later a plastic light saber came flying over the railing, crashing onto the wood floor below. "I’m Luke Skywalker," Jake said, bouncing down the ladder, "and you’re Darth Vader."
"Why am I Darth Vader?"
"We have to duel for Princess Leia," he said, as he picked up the light saber and pointed it at my chest.
"Then I’ll be Princess Leia," I replied, stepping out of striking range. Even Jake would have to agree that my voice sounded a lot more like Carrie Fisher than James Earl Jones.
"You said you’d play any game I wanted, and now you’re taking it back."
"I’m not taking it back. I just want to play a different part."
"Noooo," he whined.
"Then who’s going to play Princess Leia?"
"Mommy. She always plays the princess."
I couldn’t object to that. And it could’ve been worse. He could’ve forced me to play Chewbacca.
"Why don’t you let Sean and Tony guard your light saber while you change," Jill said, grabbing it by the blade before Jake could send a stack of freshly washed dishes crashing to the floor. "I’ll be up in a minute to help you with your costume."
Jill only had to threaten him twice more before he ran up to the loft.
"I suppose you’re going to tell me I have to change too?"
"I’m afraid so," Jill said. "Anything black will do."
That part would be easy. I trudged down to my tent and swapped my jeans and sweatshirt for black pants, a black wool sweater, and Captain Bailey’s black galoshes. When I returned to the cabin, Jake was jumping around the living room in his long underwear with one of Jill’s white button-downs, which reached to his knees, double belted around his waist. Sean and Tony were still playing cards at the dining room table.
"Don’t you guys have something better to do?"
"Not really," Tony said.
"We wanted to see the first female Darth Vader," Sean added, and grinned at me.
"Well, you’ve seen her. You can go now."
"Spoil sport," Tony said, as he pushed back his chair.
"May the force be with you," Sean intoned, s
ending himself and Tony into a laughing fit as they made their way out the cabin door.
"Okay, Jake, let’s get this over with."
"Your costume’s not finished."
I looked down at my all black outfit. "It looks finished to me."
"You need a helmet," he said.
"Sorry, I left all my helmets back in L.A."
"Mommy can make you one."
"You look good," Jill said, when Jake and I joined her in the office.
"Thanks. I was afraid these pants would be tight, but all the hiking around the island must be working." I certainly wasn’t losing weight from my diet.
"I meant you make a good Darth Vader."
"Oh." I wasn’t sure if that was a compliment or an insult. "Don’t you have to put on your Princess Leia costume?" She was still wearing her khakis and flannel shirt.
"No, I’ve got a report I need to finish, so Princess Leia’s going to be hiding on another planet while you two duel to the death."
"Excuse me, but has either of you even seen Episode VI?" I didn’t want to give away the ending if they hadn’t, but they needed to know that Luke doesn’t kill Vader. He only dies because he forces Luke to take his helmet off.
"I meant pretend death," she said. "Come with me."
Jake and I followed her into the kitchen, where she placed a large silver mixing bowl upside down on top of my head. I had to push the rim up just to see. "What’s this for?"
"That’s your helmet," Jake said.
I turned to Jill, who nodded confirmation.
"Isn’t Darth Vader’s helmet supposed to be black? Besides, it’s too big." I shook my head from side to side so the bowl slid around. "See. It’ll fall off as soon as I move." Not to mention I no doubt looked like an idiot with a mixing bowl on my head!
"Well, sometimes we have to use our imagination when we dress up. Right, Jake?"
"Right," he said, and made the "wah" sound as he flipped the switch on his light saber, causing the white plastic blade to glow fluorescent green.
I lifted the mixing bowl off my head and set it on the counter. "Well, I can’t fight without a light saber." I’d hoped I’d found the fatal flaw in their make-believe plan. What was Jill going to substitute—a rolling pin? I’d clobber the kid.
The ever resourceful Jill just pulled the cardboard tubes out of two paper towel rolls and cinched them together with duct tape.
"You’re giving me a cardboard light saber? There’s no way I can win with this."
Jill gave me a quizzical look. "Sydney, he’s six."
Oh right. I was new to this big sister stuff.
Jill packed the paper towel rolls with balled-up scrap paper to keep them from getting crushed, then covered the cylinder with red construction paper, and drew a black handle on one end.
After Jill finished my light saber, Jake insisted I put my helmet back on. I argued that since my hair was dark, I didn’t need one, but ultimately agreed to put it to a vote. I lost two-to-one along family lines. After I twisted my hair into a bun, Jill grabbed another belt and used it to fasten the mixing bowl to my head. When Jake complained that I was missing the cape, Jill returned with a black rain slicker, the arms of which she tied around my neck. Once I donned my sunglasses, Jill pronounced my outfit complete and Jake pulled me outside to the trail.
"We can pretend it’s a walkway on the ship."
"You mean the one in Episode V where Darth tells Luke he’s his father?" I always loved that scene.
"I don’t know," Jake whined.
Jake may have had the better outfit, and definitely the cooler light saber, but clearly I was the bigger fan.
After I followed him down the hill to a small flat area where the wood planks hadn’t yet buckled, he stopped and pointed the light saber at my head. "Release the Princess now, Vader, or prepare to die."
That line didn’t even sound familiar. "Time out," I said, and lowered my paper towel rolls. "What episode are we in?"
"Sydneeeeey! You’re ruining it."
"I’m sorry, Jake, but I need to know my motivation. I can’t play Darth Vader if I don’t know what’s going on."
"We fight and Luke Skywalker kills the evil Darth Vader and saves the Princess."
"You know it doesn’t happen like that in any of the movies, right?"
"Sydneeeey!"
"All right, all right. I’ll just follow your lead."
Jake made the "wah" sound again and raised his light saber, and I raised mine. "Are you going to release the Princess?" he asked.
"No," I said, lowering my voice in my best Darth Vader imitation. I even added some heavy breathing to replicate the sound effects. "If you want the Princess, then you’ll have to kill me to get her."
"Then prepare to die," he said and jabbed me in the chest.
"Ow! That hurt."
Jake stabbed me again, this time in the stomach.
So I raised my light saber and dueled. His plastic saber was stronger than my cardboard one, but I had the height advantage. We were slowly moving down toward the campground when I heard voices behind me. I turned around and found Brie and Duncan heading up the trail.
"What on earth are you doing?" Brie asked, as Jake stabbed me in the arm.
"No fair," I said, turning back to him.
"Release the princess, Darth, or prepare to meet your doom."
"Who are you supposed to be?" Duncan asked, staring at our outfits.
"I’m Darth Vader, and he’s Luke Skywalker. Can’t you tell?"
"I always thought Darth Vader’s helmet was black," Duncan replied.
"We had to improvise," I said, turning back just in time to block Jake’s light saber with my arm. If I was smart, I’d let him kill me now before I was completely covered in bruises, but I couldn’t give up that easily.
"Don’t move," Brie said before she took off running toward the cabin.
The three of us—Jake and I dueling, Duncan offering pointers from the sidelines—had almost reached the turn-off for the campground when Brie returned with Jill’s video camera.
"Oh no," I said, grabbing the plastic blade of Jake’s light saber so he couldn’t stab me with it while I talked to Brie. "You’re not taping this."
"It’s not for me, it’s for Jill," she said, as if that made all the difference.
"Jill’s already seen me in this get-up," I said, keeping my grip on Jake’s blade as he struggled to pull free.
"She said she wants it for Jake’s memory book."
"What’s a memory book?" Jake and Duncan asked simultaneously.
"A lie Brie tells to embarrass me."
"It’s true," Brie said, "I swear. I told Jill she needed to come and see this, and she asked me to tape it for her."
I had to let go of Jake’s light saber to make a grab for the camera, and he took the opportunity to whack me in the legs. "Hey, that hurt!"
"You’re evil, Darth Vader. Nothing you say can save you now."
Fine with me. I lowered my light saber and said, "Okay, I’m done."
"What do you mean?" Jake said. "We haven’t even gotten to the boat yet."
"What boat?" both Brie and I asked.
"When Darth Vader dies, Luke sets him on fire and pushes him out to sea in the boat."
Obviously that wasn’t going to happen. Even Brie backed me up on that.
"I’m not really going to set her on fire," Jake said. "It’s all just pretend."
"Then you can pretend to set me out on the boat too, because we’re not doing that either."
"Sydney, you promised!"
"I did not promise to go out into the ocean in a rubber dinghy." However I did finally agree to let Darth Vader die on the steps leading down to the boat cove just to shut the kid up.
With our agreed-upon ending in place, Jake and I raised our light sabers. I fenced backward, moving us toward the beach as quickly as possible, while Duncan cheered us on and Brie videotaped. When we reached the top step, I dropped my light saber and clutched my chest. "You got
me, Luke."
"Not like that," Jake said. "Luke has to stab Darth Vader."
"Who are you—George Lucas?"
"Sydney!" he yelled.
I sighed, but raised my paper towel rings. "You’ll never take me alive, Luke." Then we clashed light sabers a few more times, and I let Jake stab me in the chest. Unfortunately for me, the kid was strong, and the stairway was still wet from last night’s rain. I reached out for the railing, but wasn’t fast enough. I don’t remember the fall, just the waking up.
Chapter 26
When I opened my eyes Brie, Duncan, and Jake were all standing over me. My left foot was one down from the top step, and my right leg was folded underneath me at the knee. I tried to sit up, but I immediately started sliding.
"Get behind her," Brie yelled to Duncan.
As he took a step down, the heel of his boot slipped on my light saber, and Duncan tumbled forward. Seconds later, he was the one crying out in pain.
Brie immediately abandoned me for Duncan. Between the handrail and Jake’s support, I managed to pull myself upright. My right knee hurt, but I didn’t think anything was broken. We weren’t so sure about Duncan. He was lying on the top landing, flat on his back, with one hand clutching the opposite shoulder.
"Are you okay?" Brie kept asking him.
He didn’t speak. He just kept panting and squeezing his eyes shut.
Then out of nowhere, Ethan came bounding down the metal staircase. "What’s wrong with you?" he yelled to Duncan. "She’s the one who fell."
At the time it didn’t occur to me to ask him how he knew that. I just told him what happened.
"I think I dislocated my shoulder," Duncan finally said between cries of pain.
"How do you know it’s not broken?" Brie asked, still kneeling at his side.
"I’ve done it before," he said through panted breath. "Rugby."
"Jake, go back to the cabin and get us your mom’s first-aid kit," Ethan ordered.
"You can fix a dislocated shoulder with a first-aid kit?" This I wanted to see.
"No," he said. "Your arm’s bleeding."
Jill and Jake met us coming down the trail as the four of us hobbled up. Duncan was out front clutching his left shoulder with Brie glued to his side, and I was limping behind them with Ethan following me.