by Mari Carr
If anyone was going to have a problem keeping quiet, it wasn’t going to be him. He pulled his T-shirt over his head and dangled it in front of her face. “Maybe you’d better stuff this in your mouth, rose.”
She shot him a dirty look over her shoulder, prompting him to retreat and return with a hard thrust. She cried out loudly.
“Fuck,” she muttered as she took the shirt from him, biting down on the material. Christ, he was never washing that shirt again.
The sound of a radio drifted down the hall from Seth’s room and Sawyer grinned, despite himself. Even after his asinine behavior outside, Seth had his back, helping to drown out what he and Leah were up to.
He began to pound inside her body, taking care not to shake the bed too hard. Gripping her hips, he enjoyed the image of her ass moving toward him. She’d mentioned a few times in the past being unhappy with her weight, but Sawyer couldn’t see why. She had the perfect hourglass shape.
Leah thrashed beneath him, adding her own movements to the rhythm. Within minutes, Sawyer was on the verge of exploding. He reached around Leah’s waist and pressed on her clit. He’d become obsessed with the tightness of her pussy milking him as he came. He needed that sensation as much as he needed food and air and water. She forced more of his shirt in her mouth as her groans grew louder.
The muffled sound of her cries drove him as crazy as her screams.
“Can’t hold on, rose. Come for me. Come with me.”
Her pussy clamped down the moment he issued the invite. His balls constricted, and his cock exploded as he filled her with his come. He’d never taken a woman without a condom before Leah, but he refused to put any barriers between them. Ever.
With his climax, the turmoil of the afternoon seemed to drift away. A few minutes in her arms and his sea legs returned.
He took a deep breath and let the calm descend, relishing it.
After a few moments, Leah’s arms stopped supporting her and she fell forward onto the mattress. He followed her.
She pulled his T-shirt out of her mouth. “I can’t believe I did that.”
Sawyer chuckled. “Might be more correct to say we did that.”
She attempted to dislodge him. He rolled to the side, watching as she left the bed. “I must be out of my mind. We’re in your family’s house. I’m not this kind of girl, Sawyer. How can I look JD in the face again? What if your mother heard? What if she tells my mom?”
Sawyer fought to restrain his mirth when he saw the genuine panic on Leah’s face. “We’re not still in high school, Leah. We’re adults. There’s nothing wrong with what we did.”
She hastily set her clothing to rights. “Your family’s going to think I’m a slut.”
He frowned, rising quickly. “No. They’re not. We’re friends. There’s no reason why they wouldn’t think you just offered me a ride from the airport.”
She raised her eyebrow and gestured to the mussed-up bed.
He chuckled. “Well, I guess they would have thought that. Now they’ll probably assume you’re my girlfriend.”
“But I’m not.”
Sawyer shrugged. “Leah. I don’t have all the answers right now. Does it really matter what other people think?”
“I don’t like deceiving your family.”
Sawyer panicked. If she insisted they call a halt to things now, he wasn’t sure what he’d do. “I’m not finished with you, Leah. I wish I could offer you more, but right now, with my life such a mess, this is the most I have to give.”
She plopped into a chair in the corner tiredly. “I’m not asking for more, Saw. I’m not ready for this to end yet either.”
He breathed a sigh of relief as she looked around his bedroom, her gaze taking in every detail. He followed her visual tour, wondering what she was thinking as she looked at his old football trophies, the posters of cars and bikini-clad girls.
Now that he was moving home to stay, it was definitely time to update the décor. “Guess it’s obvious I haven’t been home much since I graduated.”
She smiled. “It’s a nice room. Big one. I sort of assumed you’d shared a room with Sam.”
Sawyer shook his head. “We did when we were kids. It was fun then. We had bunk beds and all kinds of toys and shit. As we got older, we needed our own space. Good thing there’s plenty of space in this house. Puberty hit Sam hard.”
Leah laughed. “Just Sam?”
Sawyer shrugged, but didn’t respond. “We probably would have killed each other if we’d had to share a room throughout high school.”
“I never had my own bedroom.”
He sat on the edge of the mattress. “Really? You’re an only child.”
“We couldn’t afford more than a very small apartment. When I was little, I slept in my mom’s room with her. As I got older, I claimed the living room so I could have my own space and I slept on the couch.”
He stared at her. “Leah, how did I not know all of this about you when we were younger?”
She shrugged. “I was embarrassed, Saw. Didn’t you ever wonder why I never invited you to my home to play?”
He raised his hands. “I’m a guy, Leah, and obviously not prone to thinking too much or being very observant.”
She laughed. “Maybe, but I can’t let you carry all that weight around. I was really good at shielding certain things about myself.”
He wasn’t sure why, but he was hurt by her deception. “Why wouldn’t you tell me? I didn’t care if you had money or a nice house.”
“Things that mattered when I was a teenager seem silly to me now. I wish I knew why. I think I looked at you and saw so many things that I wanted—a big family, a nice house, a comfortable life. When I was with you, I was able to forget that I didn’t have those things for a little while.”
He could understand wanting to forget. It was a feeling he was becoming far too familiar with.
He gave her a seductive smile. “So, what’s your sleeping situation now?”
She laughed. “Well, I’m not sleeping on a damn couch these days if that’s what you’re asking. Once I got a job at the elementary school, I moved into my own very spacious one-bedroom apartment and spent part of my first paycheck on a slightly used double bed someone was selling at a yard sale.” Her smile grew. “I can still remember my first night in that big bed all by myself. I felt like the Queen of England.”
He shook his head, grinning like a fool at her silly story. He’d taken so much for granted in his life, the roof over his head, the food on the table. Even his family… JD’s health. He’d assumed all those things would always be there for him.
Leah had worked her ass off for every single thing she’d ever owned. A rose in a field of dandelions. JD must have known about Leah’s struggles, known how truly remarkable she was.
Sawyer vowed then and there he’d find a way to make Leah’s life easier for her.
Vicky’s voice called up the stairs. “Dinnertime.”
Sawyer grabbed a fresh T-shirt from his bag and put it on. He held out his hand. “You ready?”
She hesitated, and then took it. “You sure we should let them assume we’re in a relationship?”
He smiled, pulling her closer. “I’m sure, girlfriend. Besides, why would that be such a bad thing?”
“What if they disapprove?”
Sawyer nodded. “That’s a definite possibility.”
Anxiety covered her face, but Sawyer didn’t let her off the hook.
He kept his face straight as he continued, “Truth of the matter is JD will probably look you straight in the eye and tell you, you can do better.”
Leah huffed loudly and punched him in the arm. “God, will you be serious?”
“I am. You can do a hell of a lot better than me, Leah. Shit. As of today, I’m an out-of-work guy living with his parents.”
She laughed, then rubbed her chin thoughtfully. “Hmm. You raise a good point. Wow. Maybe I would be smart to move on. I need to consider this.”
He tugged
her closer. “Yeah, well, don’t think too hard. I may not know much about my immediate future, but I can tell you this for certain. You’re in it.”
She smiled and he thought he saw a light sheen of tears in her eyes. “Sounds good.”
They entered the dining room hand-in-hand. Hers trembled slightly as they discovered the rest of the family seated around the table. Even Sawyer had to admit the Comptons were an intimidating sight when they were all together. It didn’t help that the family appeared to have doubled since the last time he was home.
He pulled her to the empty seat next to his. “Mom, Dad, look who I ran into in L.A.”
Vicky grinned as Sawyer pulled out Leah’s chair for her. “I was wondering where you two met up. Well, I guess I’ll do the introductions considering some things have changed since the last time you were here, Sawyer.”
Vicky started around the table. “Of course, you both know Lucy, Colby and Silas. Leah, I know you’ve met Jody, but Sawyer, I don’t think you’ve had the chance to meet Seth’s fiancée.”
“Fiancée? Wow.” Then Sawyer gave his future sister-in-law a wicked grin. “Well, let’s say I’ve met parts of her, Ma. Her feet mainly.” He was dying with curiosity to figure out how his brother had convinced the lovely brunette to marry him considering the last time he’d seen Jody, Seth had kidnapped her.
Sam snickered as well, obviously recalling the video chat where the brothers had spotted the lovely—and naked—Jody tied to Seth’s bed. As much as Sawyer wanted to hold back, he couldn’t resist laughing with his twin.
“Watch it, Saw,” Seth warned.
Sawyer spotted the opportunity for revenge and filled Leah in on the first time he’d seen Jody.
Seth shook his head, but Sawyer could tell his story wasn’t new to anyone at the table as his other brothers were quick to jump in to add a detail or two. Even JD contributed a bit.
“Leah, I’m going to tell you I always credited you for being a bright girl. Seeing you here with my rascal of a brother has me reconsidering that,” Seth said.
Leah laughed as Sawyer leaned closer to her, whispering, “And here I thought it would be JD warning you away.”
JD, the wily old fox, heard him. “Me? Why the hell, ahem, pardon ladies. Why the heck would I tell her to stay away from you, Sawyer? I figure she’s about the best thing that could happen to you.”
Leah blushed. “Thank you, Mr. Compton.”
JD put his fork down and leaned against the chair. “Blast it all, girl. Vicky and I have been telling you since you graduated from high school to call us by our first names. If you’re gonna start dating our son, I’m going to have to start insisting harder. It’s JD.”
Leah looked uncomfortable. Sawyer decided he’d better lead them to safer waters. “We only ran into each other again a couple days ago, Pa. We’re getting reacquainted.”
“That’s right,” Leah added.
JD nodded. “Dating or not, I’d still like you to call me by my first name.”
She looked at JD and gave his father a friendly smile. “Okay.”
JD narrowed his eyes, his voice gruff, commanding. “Don’t say okay, darlin’. Say JD. Let me hear it.”
“Wow.” Leah looked from JD to Sawyer and back again. “Uncanny resemblance. Never noticed it until now, JayDee,” she added with a blush as she stressed his father’s name.
Vicky laughed. “Didn’t take you long to figure that out, Leah. Sawyer is the spit of his father, and I don’t mean looks-wise.”
Silas leaned forward. “Can we finish the introductions so I can eat? I’m starving.”
Sam took Cindi’s hand. “You both know Cindi, but what you don’t know is we’re getting married. I proposed to her last night, and she said yes.”
Leah squealed with delight. Obviously she was better friends with the ranch bookkeeper than Sawyer realized. Sam wrapped his arm around Cindi’s slim shoulders, and Sawyer was blown away by the true contentment on his brother’s face.
“You’re engaged too? Jesus. Two months ago, you were climbing the ladder to success in New York.”
Sam looked at Cindi. “I finally realized there’s more to happiness than money. Cindi taught me that.”
Sawyer’s mind whirled as he took in all the changes that had occurred since he’d been gone. The last time they’d all been here together had been the night Silas said he was leaving the ranch, heading north to Alaska. Fifteen at the time, Sawyer had been devastated. He’d felt like his family was being ripped apart at the seams. He’d been wrong.
Now rather than departing, they were all running back for a different reason and Sawyer understood what it meant to truly be torn apart. He glanced at his father and wondered how they’d survive without him.
He turned to his twin. “Congratulations, Sam.”
Vicky launched into details of the double wedding they were planning for Seth and Sam and their lovely ladies while JD served the lasagna. For a little while, Sawyer was almost able to pretend that everything was normal.
“Do you still play the guitar, Leah?” Sam asked.
Leah smiled and nodded.
“As I recall, you were really good,” Seth said.
She shrugged. “I’m okay, I guess. I’m afraid most of my strumming happens in the classroom these days. I play a mean Insy Weensy Spider.”
Cindi laughed. “I was hoping we could ask you to play something a little more contemporary at the wedding. You have a beautiful singing voice.”
Leah sobered up. “You want me to perform at the wedding?”
“Of course,” Cindi replied.
Sam looked concerned. “Is that going to be a problem?”
Leah shook her head. “No, not really. I’m flattered.”
Cindi touched Sam’s arm as she leaned toward Leah. “I talked to Jody this afternoon, and we think it would make the wedding really special.”
“Okay. Then I’ll do it. When’s the big day?”
Every voice at the table except his and Leah’s answered in unison. “Weekend after next.”
Sawyer choked on his beer, rising quickly. “In two weeks? Were you even planning to fucking invite me to that?”
His anger resurfaced. It felt like everything in his family was changing, but no one had bothered to clue him in. Everyone was moving forward, heading toward something while he was treading water simply to keep his head above the surface. The feeling of drowning pressed down on him, and he needed air.
“Dammit, Sawyer. You don’t understand.” Sam stood as well, but Sawyer had had enough surprises to last him a lifetime.
He lifted his hand. “No, I guess I don’t.” He looked at Leah. “I’m sorry, rose. I can’t be here right now. I need a minute.”
He could see in her face that she understood. “Alone?”
He nodded. Before anyone else could issue a protest, he left the dining room as the headache he’d held at bay all day unleashed itself on him.
The screen door slammed behind him before he could catch it. He actually paused for a moment, expecting his mom to yell at him. When the chastisement didn’t come, he continued until he reached the edge of the yard.
He took the dirt path that meandered through the woods and led to a small creek, letting the moon light his way. He was overcome with guilt for leaving Leah alone with his family. While they’d be nothing but courteous to her, he knew she’d been uncomfortable going in. Yet another way he’d fucked up his grand return.
He sighed heavily. Tonight had proven one thing. He wasn’t fit to be anyone’s boyfriend—pretend or otherwise. He hadn’t been kidding with Leah earlier. He had no job, no home, nothing to offer a woman except misery and anger. For Leah’s sake, he needed to cut her free and end the relationship before he hurt her. Yet, even as the thought crossed his mind, he knew he wouldn’t.
He picked his way gingerly through the dark woods. His family had looked so content at dinner. Despite all the bad stuff going on, they’d pulled together. Ordinarily, Sawyer would have been a
part of it all, but tonight, he’d felt like an outcast.
He wondered when he’d become persona non grata in his family and how in the hell he could get back in.
Chapter Seven
The next few days passed in a blur as Sawyer threw himself into his chores. His mother was ruling the ranch with an iron fist, keeping his brothers and the hands hopping with wedding preparations. The big event was going to take place in the backyard and he’d spent every waking minute of every day since he’d returned home mending large tents, building an arch, cleaning up the yard and planting flowers.
He’d been cordial to his brothers, though none of them had said more than a few words in passing, usually in regards to whatever task they were working on. He knew he should break the ice, but he was struggling to find the words. Seeing JD so sick was gnawing away at his insides. He was fucking pissed off. Why did this have to happen to his dad? JD was one of the best men he’d ever known and he didn’t deserve this fate, this suffering. It seemed like anger was the only emotion he could manage. He was surly and miserable and, unfortunately, his brothers were catching the brunt of it. He sure as hell couldn’t let JD see how much he was hurting.
Every evening after dinner, he’d sit in the living room with JD and Vicky, watching TV, talking and catching up. After the initial shock of seeing his father’s illness wore off, Sawyer was relieved to discover his father’s spirit was still strong. Most nights the TV ended up on mute as he and JD reminisced about the “old days” or swapped funny stories about stuff that had happened since Sawyer joined the Coast Guard. Vicky always teased them for their ability to tell the biggest fish stories she’d ever heard. One night she declared they were neck in neck in the bullshit race, which prompted them to spin longer and more ridiculous stories. Sawyer had gone to bed that night with sore stomach muscles from laughing so hard.
Leah went back to work the day after they returned to Wyoming. He’d called her to offer an apology for storming out of the dining room. She’d graciously accepted it and they’d called each other a few times since then. Mainly, they talked about their days and she shared cute stories about her students. She clearly had the patience of a saint to work with such young kids day in and day out.