Tony grabbed Jill under her arms and pulled her up beside him. “Baby, you have no idea.” As she cuddled against him, he felt her hard nipples rub against his side. “You know, I can show you just how much.” He pushed her onto her back. “Close your eyes and pretend to be asleep.” He spread her legs wide apart.
“Hmm,” Jill purred, then made a few fake snoring sounds. Jill and Tony didn’t get back to sleep for an hour.
We all know that it’s hard to con a kid. They are usually smarter than any of us. Since I love stories about children, I thought I’d slip one more in as an example of how difficult it is to get anything past our progeny.
• • •
One afternoon, a six-year-old boy approachedhis mother. “Mom,” be asked, “how old are you?”
“Son,” she explained, “there are some questions that it isn’t polite to ask any woman, even your mother.”
“Oh,” he said. “Okay, how much do you weigh?”
The mother chuckled. “You know, honey, you’ve just found one of the only other questions it’s really impolite to ask anyone.”
“Oh,” he said again.
“You’re full of questions today,” the mother said. “Maybe you have one I can answer.”
“Mom, why did Dad move out?”
“Well son, we decided it’s better for us to live apart for a while. I’ll explain more about this sort of thing when you’re older.”
“Okay.”
As the six-year-old left the kitchen, he was accosted by his eight-year-old brother. “You don’t have to ask her that stuff,” the brother said. “Let’s get her driver’s license. It’s all on there.”
A few minutes later, the six-year-old returned to the kitchen. “Mom, I know everything.”
“You do?” the mother said.
“Yes. I know you’re thirty-three years old and you weigh one hundred and twenty-nine pounds. And I know why Dad left, too.”
“Oh? Why was that?”
“You got an F in sex.”
TRY SOMETHING NEW:
CONTROL GAMES
Many people have fantasies that involve either being in complete control of a sexual situation or giving up control to their partner. The captive of the swashbuckling pirate, the victim of the clever temptress, the prisoner in a dungeon. And these stories aren’t limited to the man wanting control and the woman wanting to surrender. Dominant women figure in both male and female fantasies.
The ultimate control fantasy is the dream rape—a woman being subdued by a handsome, considerate, yet totally overpowering stranger and forced to endure and enjoy all the forbidden things he does to her body. And, during the fantasy rape, she finds she cannot help but become excited. This fantasy rape forms the basis of many of the scenes from books and movies, the most famous being the scene in which Rhett carries Scarlett, kicking and screaming, up the wide stairs to the bedroom.
I don’t intend to get into any psychobabble here about why these exist or whether they indicate some severe problem in childhood. I will say only this: I’ve played both the submissive and dominant roles with my partner and I find both tremendously enjoyable. And I had a well-balanced, healthy childhood.
Irrespective of where they originate, control fantasies exist and can be some of the most erotic to act out with your partner. If you’ve never tried being in complete control, or surrendering complete control, open your mind and read on. Of course, if these fantasies are a turnoff for you and you have no thought of ever trying even a mild version of control, skip to the next section.
What’s the lure of the control fantasy?
The controller is free to do whatever he wants, and/or to “force” his partner to do whatever he wants done to his body.
The controllee is freed from the responsibility of pleasing her partner. She doesn’t have to worry about whether she’s doing the right thing.
A warning: In order to act out any control fantasy, several ground rules must be established from the outset. Control fantasies must never be used to force anyone to do anything that is even mildly repugnant. Period. In order to assure that both parties are in complete agreement, safe words must be used and the rules adhered to at all times by both parties.
A safe word is an agreed-upon word or phrase that means “Stop. Now!” Why, you are asking, can’t one partner just use the word stop? I can tell you from experience that saying, “Stop, please stop,” and knowing that your partner won’t, is wonderfully liberating. It’s another way of reinforcing that you’ve surrendered control.
So decide on an unusual word that will mean “Stop, now!” to both partners—maybe mustard or crankcase. Many couples use two words, red for “Stop now!” and yellow for “Stop for a moment; my foot’s asleep.”
Once you’ve agreed on the safe words, both of you must agree on how they are to be used. The one in control must agree that the use of this word means to stop immediately and that, if it is used, he will do exactly that—immediately and without hesitation or blame. Mutual trust is an imperative. If you don’t trust your partner to stop when you say so, or to say “Stop” when he or she wants to, don’t play.
The one who is to be controlled must agree to use the word if things get the least bit uncomfortable. This isn’t an endurance contest, and the controllee must never let things continue “just” to please a partner. Consider that if you do, or have done to you, something you hate, it will be a long time before you will get into that situation again. So much for the frequency of sex.
An agreement to use a safe word frees both partners. The one in control can now do anything—and I do mean anything—that he has dreamed of, with the assurance that if his partner wants to end things, she will say so. The controllee can allow things to continue just a moment or two longer than she might otherwise, knowing that everything will cease the moment she wants it to. A safe word can be like the sleeping pill you keep next to the bed. You sleep very well knowing you can take it if you need to.
Now that we understand the rules of the game, the next step is to find out whether your partner might be interested in sharing your fantasy. Earlier in this book, I discussed the idea of bookmarking. Slip a bookmark into one of the stories in this section (or any other, of course) and let your partner slowly, in private, adjust to something that might be completely new. Maybe you’ll find that he or she has had a control fantasy for a long time but has never found a way of sharing that with you. You, on the other hand, were willing to take the risk of revealing that you’d like to play this type of game.
Another way to discover such a desire is in the heat of the moment. Let’s say your partner is doing something you particularly enjoy. Say to him, “Don’t stop!” Then, when he does stop, as he will at some point, say forcefully, “I didn’t tell you that you could stop.” You might discover that your partner obediently continues the previous activity. Or your radar might reveal that he or she is suddenly very quiet, or very active, or behaves in a more turned-on way. Take that as a cue that he might enjoy it if you became more dominant from time to time.
Don’t discuss it yet; just consider ways to act on what you now know.
Let’s begin with a simple form of control.
KATHY AND BILL’S STORY
Bill and Kathy had been spending overnights in Atlantic City for many years, although now that they had three teenaged children, they got away only a few times a year. They particularly enjoyed the poker machines and could spend hours sitting next to each other, betting quarters on the outcome of each new deal. They looked over each other’s shoulders as they drew royal flushes and four or five of a kind.
Late one evening, Bill’s machine dealt him the ten, jack, king, and ace of spades and a seven of clubs. “This isn’t a bad hand,” he said, tapping Kathy on the shoulder.
Kathy looked at his screen and grinned. “Not at all,” she said as Bill pushed the hold button beneath the four good cards.
“It would be nice, but it’s next to impossible.” Although he knew it we
ll, he looked up at the payoff list. “One thousand coins. That’s two hundred and fifty dollars.”
“Don’t count your money yet, love.”
“I’m not.” His finger poised over the deal button, he said, “I know it’s a long shot, but how about a bargain? If this doesn’t come in, you are mine to do with what I wish for an hour before we go to bed.”
“Okay, and if it does, you have to buy me the best dinner in town with your winnings.”
“Done,” Bill said, pressing the button. The seven of clubs became the jack of diamonds. “Ah well, at least I have a paying pair.”
They played the machines for another hour, had a few good hands, and finally cashed in and walked out, having lost about ten dollars between them for the evening. “Nightcap?” Bill asked.
“Nah. I had three of those delicious Bloody Marys at the machine. I’m a bit tipsy as it is.”
Bill pushed the elevator button and said, “You know you owe me an hour of servitude.”
“Huh?” Kathy said.
“You mean you’ve forgotten our bet? The royal flush earlier?”
“Oh, right. I didn’t really think you were serious.”
“Well, I am.” The elevator doors opened, and when they were inside, he pushed the button for the third floor. “You belong to me for an hour, starting when we get to the room.” The indicator light flashed 3 and the doors opened. “Think about that. I can make you do anything I want. Or,” he said, pausing, “I can do whatever I want to you.” As they walked down the hall, he pulled the room key from his pocket and handed it to Kathy. “Open it.”
Kathy took the key and opened the door. Bill placed his hand in the small of his wife’s back, guided her inside, and closed the door behind them. In the dark, he dropped his jacket on the chair and knelt in front of his wife. He had always loved his wife’s legs, and now he slid his hand up the outside, feeling the silkiness of her stockings. “You know,” he said, “I’ve always thought you have the most beautiful legs of anyone in the world. I enjoy touching them, licking them, kissing them, especially when they’re covered with your nylon stockings. But I have never gotten my fill. I always have the feeling that you’re in a hurry.” He slid his hands around the back of Kathy’s knees and then slipped his fingers between her nylon-covered thighs.
“I love the way you feel inside of me and I guess I get impatient.” She shuddered and her knees buckled.
“I know you do, but I want you just to stand there. You’re mine tonight, remember? Now spread your legs; I want to touch them.”
Kathy swallowed hard and moved so her feet were about twelve inches apart.
Bill rubbed his fingertips up and down her legs, caressing her calves and knees with his cheek. “God, you feel so good, so sexy.” He felt Kathy tremble. Slowly, he stroked, each time getting deeper between his wife’s thighs, brushing her nylon-covered pussy lightly. “Do you still keep those little cuticle scissors in your makeup kit?” He got up and flipped on the bathroom light, which left the main room with shafts of light and deep shadow.
“Yes,” Kathy said huskily.
“Get them for me.”
Kathy found the scissors and gave them to her husband. “Now, back where you were.” She stood, legs spread, in front of her husband. “You know,” he said, pulling her panty hose down to her thighs, “I love the feel of your legs in stockings.”
“That’s why I wear them. I love it when you touch me like this.”
“But panty hose are the devil’s invention. I can stroke your gorgeous thighs, but I can’t touch the places I want to touch.” He quickly cut Kathy’s bikini panties up both sides. “I want to be able to touch your wet pussy.” He pulled at the front panel and the destroyed panties were in his hand. He dropped them into the wastebasket. “I wonder what man-hater invented these things.” He grabbed the crotch of the panty hose and cut the seam up the center, not quite to the elastic. “That’s so much better. You can pull them back up now.”
“But baby … ”
“No buts. The bet was for an hour, and we have”— he looked at his watch—“forty-nine more minutes.”
Kathy pulled the hose back up over her naked flanks.
“And let’s do this without your skirt.” He unzipped his wife’s miniskirt and tossed it on the chair. As she started to unbutton her blouse, he slapped her hands. “No you don’t,” he said. “I like you dressed.” He chuckled. “Or at least half-dressed.”
Bill knelt on the floor at his wife’s feet and pressed his cheek against her belly. He kneaded her stocking-covered buttocks, letting his hands roam her hips and thighs. He kissed her pubic bone and listened to her moan. “Want me?”
“Oh yes,” Kathy said, grabbing his head and attempting to pull him to his feet. “Let’s do it.”
“Not so fast. Spread your legs wider.”
“But baby …”
“Welshing on our bet?”
“No, but …”
“Spread ’em.”
Kathy widened her stance in her spiked heels until she was almost off balance.
Bill spent the next ten minutes just stroking his wife from the waist down, feeling her tremble with need. “Now,” he said, “to see how you taste.” He used his thumbs to pull the crotch of the panty hose apart, then stuck his tongue out. From his kneeling position, he could flick the tip of his tongue over his wife’s erect clit. “Ummm,” he said, “you taste delicious. And you’re so wet.”
Kathy grabbed a handful of Bill’s hair and tried to pull him closer. “Yes baby,” she said. “So wonderful. But I can’t stand still anymore. My knees won’t hold me up. Let’s lie down so you can fuck me.”
“I want to do it like this,” he said, still fully dressed. His tongue worked over her nub until she was screaming with need. “I like it with you standing up.” He rubbed her buttocks and hips through her tight nylon hose.
“Please,” she begged. “Please.”
“Remember our bet. I still have time,” Bill said, driving her closer to the edge. “I’m going to make you come standing up, mostly clothed, with just my tongue.”
“Oh God,” she yelled.
It took only a few moments until Bill felt Kathy arch her back and clamp her thighs around his face. “Yes,” she screamed. “Yes! Now! Right now!”
Bill kept licking and sucking until he felt Kathy’s body relax. He sat back on the floor, unzipped his pants, and allowed his hard cock to stand straight up in his lap. “Sit here, baby,” he said.
Kathy stared at her husband’s cock, caught in a shaft of light from the bathroom. It was bigger than she had ever seen. She straddled his legs and, still dressed from the waist up, sat on his lap, driving his cock inside her through the slit in her panty hose.
Bill felt his cock slip deep into his wife’s soaked channel. He cradled her buttocks and raised and lowered her body. Up and down she moved on his body until he felt himself coming. “Don’t stop, baby,” he yelled. “Don’t stop!”
She clenched her vaginal muscles and his semen sprayed into her. He yelled loudly as he came, and together they collapsed on the floor.
A few minutes later, Kathy said, “Wow. That was amazing.”
“Yeah, it was,” Bill said.
Kathy got up, stripped off her clothes, and climbed into bed. “You know, we have time to play the machines a bit in the morning. And if we bet like this again, we might just have time for a trip back to the room before we go home.”
Bill climbed into bed beside his wife. “We just might at that.”
This was a very basic, nonthreatening control game, one that anyone can play, since either party can end the game at any time. Kathy didn’t have to go along with Bill’s requests, but because of their long relationship, mutual trust, and complete understanding, they were able to explore a new area of sexuality.
• • •
Patti had her radar up, and her husband, Brad, took a risk. Together, they discovered that they both wanted her to be in control in the bedroo
m.
PATTI AND BRAD’S STORY
“Have you ever made it in public?” Brad asked.
Nancy blushed and her friend Patti giggled. “I don’t believe it,” Patti said. “That question actually embarrassed you. I thought you and Joe were unflappable.”
“We are,” Joe said. “But we have a checkered past. When we were young and foolish, we did some things that we can’t believe we actually did.”
“But at the time,” Joe’s wife, Nancy, said, “it seemed like a good idea.”
The two couples, Joe and Nancy and Brad and Patti, had been drinking assorted microbrewed beers all evening and the talk had gotten increasingly blunt. “Like what?” Patti pressed. “Come on, tell all.”
“No way!” Nancy said.
“But honey,” Joe argued, “these guys are our best friends and we should have no secrets.”
“Now wait,” Brad said. “You don’t have to tell us, but after that blush and the pregnant pause, you must know we’re dying of curiosity.”
“Nancy?” Joe said, squeezing his wife’s hand. They sat on twin sofas in the deserted lobby of the small resort in the mountains.
“I guess,” Nancy said, “but you tell.”
Joe took a drink, then cleared his throat. “It must have been fifteen years ago. It was a costume party, and Nancy dressed in a cop uniform and I was her prisoner. We were actually handcuffed together and everything.”
Patti sensed her husband’s entire body tense, and he gripped her hand so tightly that it actually hurt. Curious about what had elicited this reaction, she decided to ask him about it later. “And …” Patti said.
“Well,” Joe continued, “we took a lot of ribbing. One of the Dirty Harry movies had been on TV then and people kept kidding us with that line. You know, ‘Come on, make my day.’ Anyway, since we were handcuffed, someone dared Nancy to make me do sexy things to her right there in public.”
Again, Patti felt Brad shudder.
Nancy sighed, then picked up the story. “Well, I drank a lot in those days, so I pulled off my panties, hiked up my skirt, and sat down on the sofa. I spread my knees and made Joe eat me out, right there in this couple’s living room.”
Now and Forever--Let's Make Love Page 9