TRY SOMETHING NEW:
TOYS
Now that the kids are no longer snooping in your room, it might be time to develop a toy collection. I have a red quilted bag that sits beside Ed’s bed and contains a varied assortment of sex toys. Ed was the brave one who purchased my first dildo—yes, I was over forty before I ever owned a sex toy— and I still have the vibrator that Ed and I purchased from a specialty store in Manhattan more than ten years ago.
In the story that follows, Alice did a bit of shopping and surprised her husband, Mario, at a business dinner. But Mario managed to turn the tables, and a wonderful night of bliss ensued.
ALICE AND MARIO’S STORY
“I’m really sorry that I had to drag you to this thing,” Mario said to his wife as they rang his boss’s doorbell.
“Honey,” Alice said, a strange gleam in her eye, “not to worry. You may find you actually enjoy this evening.”
Mario shrugged. “If I do, it will be the first time. John Harper and that wife of his give me a pain in the—Good evening, Mrs. Harper,” he said to the overjeweled, overdressed, and overly made-up woman who opened the door.
“You must remember to call me Roberta, Mario dear,” the woman said, extending a bejeweled hand for him to touch. “I’m so glad you could make it.”
“I wouldn’t have missed this dinner for anything,” Mario said, squeezing his wife’s hand in an effort not to laugh or gag. “And Roberta, you remember Alice.”
“Yes, of course. Come in.”
Mario put his coat and his wife’s jacket in an upstairs bedroom, then joined his wife in the living room. As a jacketed waiter passed, he grabbed a flute of champagne for Alice and one for himself. “Lord,” he said, sotto voce as he handed the glass to his wife. He looked around at all the business types who filled the room. “It looks like this evening is going to be longer than most.” He spent a few minutes pointing out three of the firm’s newest clients and their wives. “I guess I have to go and be nice to the folks with the money.”
Alice leaned close to her husband’s ear. “I just want you to know something before you mingle. I’m not wearing any panties.” Mario’s startled expression told Alice that she had achieved just the effect she had intended.
For a while, Alice had realized that their love life needed a bit of spice. They had had a delightfully creative sex life when they were first married, but over time it had become predictable. A few weeks earlier, she had gotten a wonderfully outrageous idea from a women’s magazine. Then at a neighborhood erotic toy store, she had added her own imaginative twist. That afternoon, she had decided that this was just the evening to try it. And Mario would be able to do nothing about it.
“You’re what?” he said through his teeth, trying not to yell.
“I’m not wearing any underwear. And later …” Alice moved away and quickly involved herself in a conversation with Roberta and a startlingly beautiful woman from Georgia. Out of the corner of her eye, Alice watched Mario get snagged into a discussion of the firm’s latest project. A little while later, Mario stood alone. “Mario, you seem preoccupied,” his boss said, draping his arm around Mario’s shoulder. “You don’t seem to be entirely with it this evening,” he continued, loudly enough for Alice to overhear. “Is anything wrong?”
“No, no,” Mario said, glancing at Alice. “Not at all.”
“That’s good to hear,” Mr. Harper said. “Now go and do your thing.” The older man almost pushed Mario toward two of the new clients.
Fifteen minutes later, Mario seemed to have forgotten Alice’s earlier statement, so she walked up behind him and whispered in his ear, “And I’m wearing that garter belt and stockings you like so much. You know, I can feel the silk of my slip against my bare ass.” Again she walked away.
“Dinner is ready,” Roberta said.
Throughout the first course, Mario cast glances at his wife down the length of the long table, but by the time dessert was served, Mario was engaged in an animated conversation with one of the other women. Alice rose and excused herself, and by the time she returned from the powder room, the guests were all in the living room, chatting.
Alice spotted Mario on the sofa, crossed the room, and settled beside him. “I put my panties back on,” she said softly, “to hold the dildo inside.”
To Mario’s stare, Alice added, “You heard me.”
“What are you doing to me?” Mario moaned softly, moving to a less constrained position. “Harper will fire me if I screw this up.”
“You won’t,” Alice said. “You’re too good at what you do to let that happen. I just want you to know what you have to look forward to later.”
“How could I forget?”
“Oh yes, and it vibrates.”
“What vibrates?”
“The dildo. I got it last week at the Pleasure Palace Boutique, and it’s absolutely silent. It has a remote control, too, and I have it in my purse.” She opened her handbag and showed him the small white plastic control unit. “All I have to do is turn it on and … well, you can imagine what I’ll be feeling.”
Mario’s knees went weak, but then he smiled. It was either fight or play, and he realized which he wanted to do. Before Alice could stop him, Mario had snatched the control unit from her purse and dropped it into his pocket. “Now I’m in control, darling.” He grinned. “Behave or I’ll turn this thing on and I’ll be able to watch you try to resist the humming in your pussy.”
“Hey, wait a minute,” Alice said, reaching toward Mario’s pocket and trying to retrieve the control unit without making a fuss. “That’s not fair.”
Mario reached into his pocket and flipped the tiny switch. He could tell by the change in Alice’s expression that she felt the vibrator’s insistent buzz in her pussy. He flipped the switch off. He grinned. “You know, you’re right. It is absolutely silent. No one else will know what I can do by putting my hand in my pocket. But you will.” He grinned again. “I wonder what the range of this thing is.”
“About fifty feet, it said in the ad.” Then she realized what she had said, and she swallowed hard.
“Good. Now go and be a good corporate wife and mingle. But, as the saying goes, when you least expect it, expect it. Oh yes, and don’t take it out. I’m having too much fun.”
Alice smiled. She was having fun, too. But she also realized that a few more flips of that switch and she would come in front of all these people. And she didn’t usually climax quietly. “Be nice baby, or I’ll embarrass both of us,” she said.
Mario looked down at the huge tent in the front of his slacks. “Me, too.”
The next two hours were torture for Alice and Mario. Each knew what would happen after the party, but they couldn’t leave until at least eleven. Twice, Mario caught his wife’s eye and slipped his hand into his jacket pocket. A quick flip of the switch and he could watch Alice’s body jump. He knew exactly how hot she was and he could almost see her erect nipples through her wool dress. He only left the machine on for a few seconds, but it was enough to keep both of them on edge.
“John,” he said to his boss just after eleven o’clock, “Alice really isn’t feeling well this evening. I’m going to take her home.”
John Harper’s gaze found Alice in animated conversation with his wife. “She looks fine to me.”
Mario reached into his pocket. “It comes in waves.” He flipped the switch and the two men watched his wife suddenly become distracted.
“Of course,” John said. “You must take her home.” As Mario moved across the room, Mr. Harper called after him, “And I hope she feels better.”
Smiling, Mario got their coats and escorted Alice to their car. She laughed as he related the method he had used to convince his boss of Alice’s supposed illness.
“You didn’t,” Alice said as Mario drove toward their house.
“I did indeed.” He arrived at their house and pulled the car into the garage, then closed the mechanical door with the remote switch. “Now,” he said as he grabbed his
wife’s seat belt and used it to hold her tightly in her seat, “let’s stay here for a few minutes.”
“But the house is empty. Why here?”
“Because I want to try an experiment. Don’t move.” He reached into his pocket and pulled out the remote control. “Is that thing still inside you?”
“Yes,” Alice said, watching his hand.
“You tried to use it to drive me crazy, didn’t you?”
“Yes.”
“Well, two can play at that game.” He held the switch in front of her face and, while she watched, flipped it again. “Let’s see how long it takes. I want to watch you come.”
Her eyes lit up. “Oh Mario, that’s cruel.” She felt the hum in her pussy.
“It certainly is, but that’s the punishment you deserve, I think.”
“If you twist the top there, it changes the speed of the vibrations.” Alice was climbing and loving it.
“Really.” Mario slowly twisted the top and Alice could feel the hum change in her pussy. “Maybe you should tell me which speed you like best.”
Alice swallowed hard. She was going to come, but she wanted to put it off as long as possible.
“Trying to hold back?” Mario grinned at Alice’s startled expression. “I know you very well, and you know I love to watch you get higher and higher. I can read your excitement in every line of your body.” He twisted the control rhythmically back and forth. “You’re really having a difficult time holding back, aren’t you?” When Alice remained silent, Mario said again, “Aren’t you?”
“Yes,” Alice said through gritted teeth.
“Well, I want you to come now! Spread your legs.”
Still restrained by her tight dress and her seat belt, Alice parted her knees as best she could. Mario reached between her thighs and tapped his wife lightly on her clit.
She came. She couldn’t help it. Hard, hot waves of climax engulfed her body and she screamed, “Oh God.” Her body writhed as she drew the sensations more deeply into her. Finally, she took the control and turned the vibrator off. “Upstairs. I want you to fuck me good.”
“Oh darling,” Mario said.
The two left a trail of discarded clothing through the house, and by the time they reached the bedroom, they were both naked, except for Alice, who still wore her panties to hold the vibrator inside. She dropped onto the bed on her back and Mario stretched out beside her. He reached between her spread legs and touched the flat end of the vibrator. “Would it feel good if I turned that on again, or would it be too much?”
“I’m not sure.” She grinned. “Maybe you’d better try and see.”
Mario played with the control until Alice’s hips thrashed and her back arched. “My turn,” he said, pulling her panties off and withdrawing the vibrator. His cock felt hard as steel as he drove it into his wife’s drenched pussy.
“More,” Alice yelled as she felt another orgasm building. “Fuck me harder.”
Mario grabbed Alice’s thighs and pushed them upward against her chest. Then, pinning her legs, he pressed against her and plunged his cock into her wide-open pussy. Mario could hold back no longer. “Now!” he yelled as he felt semen spurt deep into Alice’s pussy.
“Yes, now!” she screamed, and they came together.
Later they lay together holding hands. “That doesn’t often happen,” Mario said, “us coming together, I mean.”
“No, it doesn’t.” Alice pulled the edge of the quilt over them. “And it was amazing.”
“I never thought I’d say this,” Mario said, laughing, “but I can’t wait until the Harpers’ next party.”
TRY SOMETHING NEW:
ORDERING FROM CATALOGS
I’ve mentioned erotic toys previously, and in a few stories, couples have played with sexual props. Since money may be a bit easier now that the kids are gone, you may want to consider ordering from a sex catalog.
First, where can you find such catalogs? There are usually advertisements for the larger companies in the back of women’s magazines. As I write this, I’m looking at the latest issue of Cosmopolitan, and there are ads for the Xandria Collection, Adam and Eve, and several smaller companies. In addition, there is a catalog of information included in my book Come Play With Me, and I have gathered a collection of “web pages for shoppers” on my web site, found at http://www.JoanELloyd.com.
Let’s talk about those heavily advertised sexual aids and vitamins for a moment.
A warning: To the best of my knowledge, there are no over-the-counter aphrodisiacs that will make her “unable to resist you,” and no pheromone products that will make you “irresistible to women.” Read all the advertisements with skepticism.
Aphrodisiacs and other types of sex drugs have been the stuff of fantasies since the first cavewoman said, “Not tonight, Og, I have a headache.” Throughout the ages and all over the world, everything from oysters and grapes to animal testicles and powdered rhinoceros horns have been sold and consumed to increase sexual prowess. More recently, fads that have swept the sexual world ranged from aspirins mixed in Coke to green M&M’s. In most cases, if they worked at all, what worked was the power of the mind, not the power of the product.
Many people believe that so-called recreational drugs can increase orgasmic potential. With many drugs, just the opposite is the case. The opiates, opium derivatives like heroin, actually decrease sexual function and can inhibit erections. Some claim that cocaine enhances the sexual experience, but studies have found that this is not the case. A moderate amount of alcohol does induce relaxation, but that’s the only way it affects sexual performance. Marijuana is also relaxing in very small quantities, but in large amounts, it dissociates mind and body and isn’t conducive to good sex. Many say that after smoking grass, they become so laid-back that they can’t be bothered with sex at all. Ed smoked a joint a few times years ago and remembers that he got interested in intercourse, got ready, then forgot why he had been interested in the first place.
Prescription drugs do exist that have positive effects on sexual performance, but none comes without side effects, and such drugs should not be used without the advice of your doctor. One such drug is yohimbine, which has been around for many years and goes in and out of favor with doctors. The most recent studies seem to show that it is effective in about one-third of men with long-term erectile problems, but it seems to have no aphrodisiac effect on men with normal sexual function. Again, talk to your doctor.
Gels and such that are “guaranteed” to prolong your erection do just that. They do it, however, by numbing your penis to dilute the otherwise-overwhelming sensations. If that seems a good idea to you, they appear to be harmless, so give them a try.
I will discuss sexual dysfunction and impotence in the chapter entitled “We’re Not Kids Anymore,” so if you have such a problem, refer to that chapter and then check with your doctor. There are new medical treatments, ones that work. The products available through ads in magazines, however, aren’t worth your money.
But with all these problems in finding a true “sex drug,” the power of the mind mustn’t be overlooked. If you believe you’re the sexiest thing to come over the hill since James Dean or Elizabeth Taylor, then you will be sexier. If you and/or your partner believe that you’re a male or female superstud, you will be. And if you can get your partner to believe that you’ve just given him or her a powerful aphrodisiac that will make him or her incredibly turned on, then it will happen that way.
A suggestion: Give your partner a small glass of colored water or a candy pill and then tell him that he’s just ingested something that will make him unable to resist your slightest sexual desire. If the two of you are into it, it’s a terrific game.
In the back of my issue of Cosmo, there is also an ad for Intimate Treasures, a company that assembles small ads for catalogs and charges a nominal fee for forwarding your name to one or more of the companies listed in their ad. They have catalogs for everything from XXX-rated movies of every description to boo
ks and magazines, toys, and clothing—in other words, anything you and your partner might want to use to spice up your sex life. I’ve sent orders to them and, for the most part, received what I requested. They will send you a listing of their catalogs if you write to Intimate Treasures, PO Box 77902, San Francisco, CA 94107-0902. If you’re a computer person, they also have a site on the World Wide Web, located at http://www.intimatetreasures.com. And yes, it all does come in a plain wrapper.
What can you order? Almost anything, from homemade amateur X-rated videos to lingerie, from extrahigh-heeled shoes to nurses uniforms, from leather restraints to strawberry condoms. The prices range from quite low to exorbitant. But worth it? That, of course, depends on your pocketbook and desires.
How does one order? In most cases, you can order any product by mail, by phone, or by fax. Some even have E-mail addresses for faster service.
Sometimes just looking through the catalog will get the juices flowing. At other times, you can discover new things that can heat up your bedroom. In Craig and Sue’s story, Sue has a real problem with the way she looks, as do most of us as we age. I’ll cover the problems with body image more in the next chapter. For now, we can sympathize with Sue, but we can also delight in how groundless her fears proved to be.
CRAIG AND SUE’S STORY
Craig and Sue had been married for thirty-two years and, after twenty-eight years of parenting, each of their three children was finally in his or her own apartment. Their sons were both gainfully employed. Their daughter, Nancy, was married and a stay-at-home mom with two small children. Craig and Sue finally had the house to themselves, but although they had both been creative in the bedroom earlier in their marriage, over the years they had settled into a comfortable routine of plain vanilla sex once a week or so.
One week, their daughter and son-in-law left their two preschool children with Sue and Craig while they went on a cruise. Upon their return, they stayed for a few days and the six of them had a wonderful time together. The afternoon they left, Sue and Craig stretched out in the living room.
Now and Forever--Let's Make Love Page 13